Tragedy.

[futurobrillante]

Notes: This is unmber 41, tragedy, from my previous batch of sentences. I just had to write it. I had to. Be warned! Angst, angst, angst! Sex! Violence! Angsty!pilots! Let's put the rating at at least an R, here, kids. I'm not even kidding. X-posted to

Comments

[i_am_girlfriday]

Ack! I just got home and I REALLY NEED TO UNPACK! But you've gone and posted fic and I am fighting the urge. Okay, I am just going to put sheets on the bed, then I'll climb in for a read and (probably?) a cry. It's all your fault if I'm late and wearing wrinkled clothes to work tomorrow.

[futurobrillante]

Hee.

Please don't be late 'n wrinkled tomorrow. =]

Take the time to read the fic carefully. Forwards, and backwards.

[i_am_girlfriday]

I did as instructed. I think the forwards and backwards structure was an excellent choice. The sentence promt is so ugly that you just wonder how our pilots got to that point. By working backwards you suspend the tension that much longer and really make the reader work for resolution.

I think you're on to something with the pursed lips. It's like everyone can sense what's coming. Kara is going to get her heart broken and it makes me wonder what happened to Lee's. The way Kara operates with Lee and abuse is scary. She won't take shit from just anyone--just the people who are supposed to love her most. It's awful and I wish she didn't have such a high tolerance for pain.

I like the you incorporated concepts from some of the other stories (Lee and Helo as drinking buddies and Lee being even more subborn than Kara...)

G'Night!

[futurobrillante]

I think it sort of worked because you first hear it from the ending to the beginning, but then from the beginning to the ending provides an entirely new look at it.

I've personally always kind of been a little apprenhensive of how Kara operates with Lee in general (she won't take ANYTHING from most, but from him she will - she changes around him), and I think that if it ever got to the point of Lee being... well, like he is in this story, she'd put up with it for awhile, because that's just how she is with him. I can easily see that whatever there is between them being almost fatal.

The Lee and Helo being drinking buddies concept just totally delighted me when I thought of it, so I sort of HAD to put it in something, haha. And, lucky me, it actually fit in with this one...

Thanks for reading and commenting. =]

[nebakanezer]

Okay so NOW I am late for work. I mean late to *start* work. But I couldn't help myself.:) There are so many beautifully eloquent parts to this. It's interesting (in a very good way) and very complicated (again, in a good way) This especially;

He was a man consumed, and she was the only one with the power to turn both the rage and the tenderness on and off. The first time she realized that she possessed that power, she was absolutely terrified.

I've only read it once, but I will come back again. I just had to tell you.

Can I friend you?

[futurobrillante]

Yes! By all means friend me. I like friends.

I'm glad you liked it. It was meant to be complicated, I think.

By all means come back as often as you like. Read it forwards, and backwards.

[latteaddict]

Finally got a chance to read this (in both directions). It's very clever and really, really painful. Thank goodness Kara has Helo or else I would be more afraid for her

[futurobrillante]

But with your story it's like Lee has finally slipped over the edge and he no longer has any boundaries or limits - I hope Lee never gets to this place in the series.
Me too. But, somehow, though obviously we all wish he won't... Kara'd be just the person (the only person?) to push him enough. I think he has a nasty little tendency to bottle things up inside him, which can provide for some bad feelings and resulting actions. And we already have seen that he really does have the ability to lash out after keeping quiet - I'm thinking of the scene in the beginning of the mini, in which the first conversation he has with his father in two years is really just Lee exploding with anger over Zak's death. We've seen him get mad at Kara, too, and it's not usually pretty. And, as you said, he's obviously not at all shy about hitting her.

It has to be more than the fact that she loves him. I seems obvious that it is tied up in her abusive childhood and her issues with trust.I think she tends to take what she feels the deserves, out of guilt and

[fadingphantom]

Sigh... I'm terrible, I thought I had reviewed this, but I came back to reread it and I obviously haven't. I think I was kind of reviewing it in my head while I was reading so it felt like I had or something. doh