Wise Up Part A-3
Title: Wise Up Part A 3
Author: Reddress11
Summary: Wedding day. Addison and Mark have their final talk. Derek has to face a few truths and finally grow up. If you want earlier chapters so you know what’s going on? Go to the link “Reddress11” under the picture. They are in descending order. Thanks for reading and please review.
Dream
Mark slid off her top and heatedly pushed Addison up against the counter top. Pulling at his jeans Addison hurriedly tried to rid him of his clothing.
Running his tongue along the bottom of her jaw, he whispered in her ear, “I love you.”
His hands slid up her skirt and pushed down her panties. In one swift movement he lifted her onto the counter and spread her legs.
Kissing her neck, he moved towards her chest. “I love you Addison. I only want to be with you.”
With her eyes closed and her head back, she loudly moaned as he slipped into her. With each thrust she curled her fingers into his wavy black hair.
“I never loved her the same way. I should have been never left you.”
As he reached in between their bodies and roughly rubbed her clit, her breathing became erratic until all of her muscles finally tighten around him. Cuming, she breathlessly answered, “I love you too Derek.”
Pushing his head back from its resting place on her chest she smiled into his dark blue eyes. “Don’t wake up Addison.”
“What?”
Derek leaned up and kissed her, “I said, don’t wake up. Just stare here with me.”
BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP
Addison’s eyes flew open. Looking around she tried to focus on the room and remember where she was. Trying to sit up, she couldn’t move as Mark wrapped his arm around her waist. Looking over and seeing Mark’s face buried into a pillow she quickly looked down at herself and patted down her body. Finding that she was still fully clothed she breathed a sigh of relief, “Thank god.”
Addison smiled as she looked at Mark; he looked peaceful. Removing his arm from her waist she briefly kissed his cheek. In response Mark groaned and rolled over. Crawling out of bed Addison grabbed her jeans and boots. Turning at the door she looked one last time at Mark and whispered, “Goodbye. I hope you find happiness.”
Walking into the kitchen Addison quickly called for cab service and then checked her messages. There were two from Derek and one from his mother.
Message
Addie dear, it’s your favorite mother in-law, Anne. Derek told me that you’re in Seattle. That’s wonderful; I’m flying in for the wedding around noon. I guess I try to get a hold of you again after I’m settled. I can’t wait to see you; it’s been what… a month? Talk to you soon.
“So how was it?”
Pulling up a chair she answered, “It was a typical bachelor party.”
“Did anything happen?” The tone of Callie’s voice made it apparent as to the real question she wanted to ask.
“I said goodbye.”
“Goodbye, to whom?”
“Mark.”
Silence fell over the room, “Oh. Did you make the right decision?”Addison thought over last night and the look on Mark’s face.
“I think so.”
“You think so?”
“I didn’t want to… but it was right.”
“Did you love him?”Rubbing her eyes she answered, “Like crazy, but it wasn’t enough.”
“What do you mean it wasn’t enough?”
“I love him but I don’t want to spend the rest of my life with him.”
“Did you tell him that?”
“In so many words.”
“What did you say?”
“It wasn’t what we said it was more what both felt and knew.”
“And what was that?”“Love; when I fell asleep with him I felt love.”
“Mmm… you felt love?”
“And loss, but it wasn’t unbearable. It was just… loss.”
As Addison stared at the wall, oblivious to the world outside her own mind, Callie cocked her eyebrow, “And what did you know?”
Shifting her focus back to Callie, “Know?”
“You said that you both felt and knew something. So what was it?”
“We both knew that it was over.”
“And…”
“And what?”
Callie sighed as she patiently attempted to lead her, “Why was it over?”
“I told you, because we both knew that I didn’t love him enough.”
Rushing the conversation to drive home her point, Callie continued, “Why? Why didn’t you love him enough?”
“I wasn’t willing to walk away and forget.”
“Forget what Addison?”In silence neither of them said a word. Both knew as they held eye contact the reason that Addison couldn’t start over with Mark.
“Nothing has changed Addison. You’re coming full circle to the reason that you first came to Seattle. You’re not fully there yet but you’re past half way.”
Sitting up a little Callie continued, “You said that you felt love with Mark, what kind of love was it?”
“An addiction; Mark was an addiction that I couldn’t let go. I kept thinking that if things were different; if the circumstances changed it would work.”
Callie was by no means an expert on relationships but she did know what love felt like. Callie had, like most, experienced both love and infatuation. Both feelings she knew could be tremendously powerful: lead someone to do things that they never thought they would. But no matter how all encompassing infatuation and love were they nothing compared to the addictiveness of hope. Over the past three years of their friendship, Callie had seen Addison experience all three emotions. Callie, unbeknownst to Addison, knew what her friend’s weakness would forever be.
“Hope Addison. Hope is the reason that you haven’t moved on. Your addiction isn’t the idea of Mark and happiness with him. Your addiction is the idea that he can fill that void; maybe help dissipate that nagging feeling of hope that’s been with you all along.”
She didn’t know why she all of a sudden was annoyed but Addison sarcastically answered, “So that’s what it is?”
“Don’t get that tone with me.” Holding her stomach, Callie pursed her lips together, “I may be pregnant and you may be my doctor but don’t think I won’t smack some sense into you. You’re not mad at me, so don’t pretend that you are. You’re made life, Addison. The only question is why?”
“You said I’ve come full circle, but to tell you the truth I feel like the only thing I’m circling is the drain.”
Standing up Addison firmly set her hands on her hips and began pacing the room, “Hope? What the hell? What am I hoping for? I’m drying up here and I think that hope is long gone.”
“You’re not as dry as you think. Don’t try to play the realist with me Addison Montgomery. You are a dreamer, masquerading as realist, who is trying to make herself into a pessimist.”
Stopping, she confusingly looked at Callie, “What the hell does that mean?”“It means you’re still looking for that fairytale but you don’t want to admit it. Just because things weren’t perfect doesn’t mean that it still can’t be wonderful. The white horse and happily ever after is over rated. Open up those big blue eyes of yours and stop chasing your tail. You know what you want. You have always known. You just weren’t always been able to have it. People make mistakes and things aren’t always the way we planned or envisioned they would be. You’re good person and you deserve to have that dream. So don’t ignore that feeling; move past hope already and do something about it.”
Grabbing her bag, Addison answered, “Maybe I will.”
Shooting her a doubting look Callie answered, “Right… sure you will.”
“You don’t think I will?”
“Addison, I love you like a sister but you are just as scared today as you probably were sixteen years ago.”
“I am not scared.”
“Then prove it to me. The only drain that you’re circling is the one that keeps sucking all rationality out of your mind. Stop talking to me about what you think you wanted and go get who you’ve always loved. Go make your own fairytale.”
“We need to talk.”
“About what?”
Walking into his office Burke knew where their conversation was heading and he wasn’t sure if he was up to the challenge today.
“About yesterday; what the hell was that?”“Sex Cristina, we had sex. Good sex if I remember correctly.”
“That’s my point. We’re not doing that. We don’t do that.”
“Since when have you been a stickler for commitment and sex only in relationships?”
“Since I was left at the altar by someone who clearly didn’t want to be with me.”
“It’s not wanting, Cristina. It’s more like I couldn’t.”
“You couldn’t? Fine, that’s just great. But do me a favor, no more sex. It just complicates things.”
As she moved to leave the room he answered, “I don’t like to see you with other people.”
Pissed she answered, “You don’t like the fact that I’m fucking other people?”
“No.”
“Well I’m not the one who made that decision to walk away. So I don’t really care how you feel about what I’m doing.”
“I don’t want to always have to be fighting you for the driver’s seat. In Our entire relationship I had to push you to commit. I’m not interested in convincing someone that they should be with me. I’m Preston Burke, I don’t need to beg.”
“Then don’t.”
“I just can’t help myself with you.”
“Burke… Preston, you don’t have to beg. I might be, well whatever the hell I am, but I don’t want you to beg. I just needed space and room to think. I needed you to love and appreciate the fact that I just couldn’t go there. Not then.”
“What about now?”
“It seems to me that I’m already there now.”
“And where is there?”
Walking up to him, she inhaled the scent of his aftershave, “With you, waiting for you to ask me to commit. I’m waiting for the opportunity to commit to you.”
Looking down he answered, “Marriage?”
“No, companionship. You said that needed me to commit, now I’m asking you a favor. Don’t make me marry you when I won’t take that step.”
“Why won’t you take that step?”
“Because marriage is a finalization. It means that we’re legally bond to each other. And I don’t want to feel connected to you through a piece of paper. I want to know that I’m with you because I want to be. I don’t want obligation, just trust.”
Thinking over it for a few moment he answered, “What about my need for that piece of paper?”
“I guess you need to trust that someday I’ll give that you. But someday isn’t today. I don’t know when it will happen. Can you accept that?”
Burke thought for a moment. If he didn’t he’d be miserable and if he did he would be right back where he started two years ago. In the end though, he figured that it was better to start from the beginning than to move on and accept the loss.
“Okay.”
Sliding on her heels, Addison anxiously awaited for him to arrive. Derek had promised that he would pick her up and give her a ride to the church. However, after last night and her refusal to go home with him she wasn’t sure if he would even want to see her.
As the door bell sounded Addison calmed herself. She had made her decision, she would leave the same way that she had came: alone and reconciled.
Opening the front door Addison was slightly surprised to not see Derek but instead his mother.
“Ann?”
Hugging her, Ann replied, “Hi Darling. I know, a little bit of a surprise. Did you get my message?”
“Yeah, but I thought that I’d see you there.”
“Oh, well Derek was a little preoccupied and he asked if I could come and pick you up.”
“Okay?”
On the way to the church, Ann practically talked Addison’s ear off.
“Nancy was just so upset that she couldn’t make it. And Julia, well she told me to tell you that you better come out to Connecticut to visit. So do you think you’ll be able to in the next couple of months?”
Starring out the window Addison had zoned out briefly, “What?”
“Connecticut, Julie, do you think you’ll be able to get away in a few months and visit your nieces and nephews?”“Oh- I guess. I mean of course, I’ll try to find the time to visit Julie and the kids.”
“Your nieces and nephews,” Ann corrected.
“Do I still count as their Aunt? I mean you know I love them, but Derek and I have been divorced for almost three years.”
Reaching over Ann patted her leg, “Addison, divorce or not you are not escaping this family. Once you’re in, you’re lifer; sorry.”
Smiling, Addison softly offered, “Thanks that means a lot to me Ann.”
“So are you seeing anyone?”
“A… no. I was for a while but it just wasn’t going to work out.”
“He wasn’t your type?”
“No, he was. There was just always something missing. Pete was a nice guy but it seemed like the entire relationship I was always waiting for the other shoe to drop.”
“And did it?”
“You know… no. But by that time it didn’t matter. I just realized that it wasn’t him it was me. I was the one who didn’t want to the relationship to succeed. It sounds crazy but for some reason, anytime I date I’m always waiting for something to go wrong. And when it doesn’t, I end it.”
“I don’t think it’s crazy, dear. Why shouldn’t you be waiting? You had dream, then the other shoe did drop and it was over.”
Still looking ahead Addison answered, “R-I-G-H-T.”
“So why did you come back?”
“Callie Torres is an old friend of mine and she wanted me to deliver her baby.”
Copying her tone, Ann replied, “R-I-G-H-T. So what’s the real reason that you came back?”
“I just told you.”
“Addison Forbes Montgomery- Shepherd, don’t lie to your mother. And yes, I said Shepherd and mother because as we covered before, you were always and will always be part of this family.”
“I came back to say goodbye.”
“To whom?”
“Mark.”
“Ah… Mark. And why did you say goodbye?”
“We didn’t end things very well the last time I saw him.”
“What happened?”
Shifting uncomfortably in her seat Addison thought if there was any way that she could avoid the question.
“Addison, tell your mother. You know I won’t judge you.”
“I tried to say goodbye and explain to him why I was leaving and he didn’t take it too well.”
“Why?”
“I told him that I was leaving so that I could start over and have a family. Then he asked why. He wanted me to stay here and start over with him. He wanted to have a child together.”
“And you said no, why?”
“He wasn’t ready.”
“And?”
“And I wasn’t ready to have a child with him. I didn’t want to hold him back and I didn’t think I could do it.”
“Do you love Mark?”
“I do, I really do love Mark. I know that’s weird telling you, but I did.”
“So why won’t things work?”
“I love Mark, but I don’t want to spend the rest of my life with him. I don’t think I could give him all that he needs.”
“Why?”
“I’m not ready to give him everything he needs.”
“Not ready or don’t want to?”
“I don’t want to.”
“And what is it that he needs?”
Addison again looked out the window. She didn’t want to have to say it, so she hoped that her silence would speak louder than words.
On cue, as well as any maternal mother, Ann knew exactly what Addison was thinking, “Derek. It’s Derek that’s the problem. He’s always been the problem in that relationship hasn’t he?”
When Addison still didn’t make eye contact she continued, “He wanted you to forget about him, right? Move on?”
Still starring out the window, Addison answered, “Yeah. I know sounds silly but it’s just something that I’m not willing to do.”
Driving into the church parking lot and parking the vehicle, Ann turned to Addison, “It doesn’t sound silly to me at all. When you are still in love someone, the way you are with Derek, you never get over it and you can’t walk away.”
“I never said that I was still in love with Derek.”
“Call it a mother’s instinct, then. Or, it could be the fact that you said that you came back to say goodbye, but you didn’t mention Derek.”
“What if I’ve already said goodbye to Derek?”
“Addison, I know you both all too well. I know that you were hurt and running after he did what he did to you: both times. But things between you too are never over. When two people were meant to be together they always find their way back to each other. You and Derek do always seem to be starting from the beginning.” Leaning in she finished, “And I guess that’s my point sweetheart. There always been beginnings for you two but never a definite end.”
Getting out of the car and walking away, she finished, “You think about that.”
A/N: Okay this is the second part to Part A’s ending. And if you haven’t already guessed this is the Addek ending. I know right now it seems like things are moving slowly, but don’t worry it’s all the buildup. Hang in there with me fans, I know you’re going to wonder what the hell I’m doing but if you’re an Addek fan I promise all will end well in Part A. Other than that, Maddison people, I will be updating really soon, no worries. As for other character’s involvement I try to put other story lines in. I apologize if you’re not interested in the other ships I use. Most often I use other ships to highlight and mirror what is happening, already been, or possibly going to take place in Addison’s love life.
Music: I Can’t Make You Love Me: Bonnie Raitt
Walking into the church Addison was prepared for an ending. With thirty minutes until the wedding, the pews were slowly filling up.
“Addie dear, come sit down.”
Patting the seat next to her, Ann motioned for Addison to sit near her.
“Great right up in front,” Addison thought to herself.
“So are you ready?” Derek questioned as he patted Mark’s back.
“A… yeah, I mean yes. God did you feel like this before yours?” Mark asked as his face contorted into a painfully nervous expression.
Derek smiled and thought back on his wedding with Addison. “No- I was pretty relaxed. But I mean come on, I marrying was Addison. I was set for life. If you feel the same way about Izzie then things will be fine.”
“Things will fine?” Turning away from the mirror, the look on Mark’s face clearly stated that Derek’s advice was not appreciated considering its source.
“You two are divorced.”
“I still made the right decision when I married her.”
“But you’re divorced.”
“The point isn’t whether or not we’re divorced right now. I knew at the time that I married her that I was doing the right thing. I was crazy in love with Addison. If you feel the same way about Izzie, then marry her.”
Lost in thought, Mark nodded his head and turned back to the mirror. The mentioning of Addison posed more questions then what he could deal with at the moment.
Clearing his throat, Derek tried to come off as indifferent, “So how was last night?”
“It was great. Thank you for doing all of that.”
“No, I wasn’t talking about that.”
Straitening his tie in mirror Mark had hoped they wouldn’t have to go there.
“It was fine.”
Now Derek was nervous. Like a scolded child he looked down and shifted uncomfortably, “Did-did you talk?”
“Yeah, a little.”
In Mark’s mind he quickly wished that ,“Yeah, a little,” would be enough to satisfy Derek’s curiosity. He didn’t want to have to talk about it. He knew how Derek felt and he was pretty sure that Derek knew how he felt. Pandora’s Box, of lost love and longing was not something that Mark could open before hi s wedding. Out of respect for his sanity, Mark had thought that Derek would know that, and drop the topic.
But apparently childlike jealously trumped respect on Derek’s list of priorities today.
“That was it?”
“Yep, that was it.”
“Did she say anything about…” tapering off Mark knew what he was asking.
Sighing, he had to repress the urge to turn around and pick a fight. Was he serious? Was Derek seriously asking him to define Addison’s feelings? This was his wedding day; Derek wasn’t clueless to how Mark felt about Addison. He knew that today would be a struggle for him. Mark needed his best friend. Not Addison’s jealous ex husband.
He tried to hide the annoyance in his voice but he failed,“No, she didn’t say anything about you.”
“Oh,” a little disappointed Derek turned and sat down; not quite sure what to say.
Still fixing his tie Mark tried not say anything but before he could stop himself it slipped, “If she wanted be with you she would. ”
“What’s that suppose to mean?”
“Exsactly what I said, just let go Derek. I’m sorry, you’re my best friend but you really fucked things up.”
“What?”
Frustrated that he had to spell it out for him, Mark gave up on his tie and yanked it loose.
“You made the right decision? Why did you even bother? You fucked everything up with her.”
His voice escaladed as he continued, “Why did you even start with her? From the beginning I knew you would do it.”
In a defensive tone he answered, “Do what?”
“Do what you always do, Derek. It was always the same with you. You’d be so commited in the beginning and then just when things got a little complicated you’d run; leaving whomever you had pledged undying love for devastated.”
“Who are you talking about?”
“Every woman you’ve ever dated.”
“What do mean every woman?”
“I’m talking about all of them; Addison and every female before and after her. I mean god, you left Addie, for Meredith; I’m shocked that didn’t last either. And why didn’t last Derek? Please, do tell.”
Derek ignored his question and moved on to his own accusations, “What about you? Who the hell are you to talk to my relationships? You can’t commit to anything. Giving hundreds of random women a few hours in bed with you doesn’t exactly make you the commitment guru.”
Trying to lower his voice Mark answered, “I never made promises that I knew I wouldn’t keep. I’ve never lied about who I am.”
But Derek wasn’t about to calm himself. Mark had pushed and Derek was more than ready to push back.
“What… so that makes you exempt from judgment? Avoidance doesn’t make you an honest person; it just means you’re a coward. You couldn’t even commit to this friendship. Fucking your best friend’s wife doesn’t exactly say that have my best interests in mind.”
Mark ran his hand over his facial hair and sighed, “God, you’re never going to let that go are you?”
“Why the hell should I?”
Sarcastically he continued, “I’ll tell you what… when you and Izzie have your first rough spot, I’ll do you a favor. I’ll screw the love of ‘your life’, in your bed, on favorite sheets and then ask you why can’t get over it.”
“The love of your life? Oh, that’s great. Who the hell do you think you’re talking too? Don’t try to play the victim with me. I was there. I know you and I know what happened.”
“What are saying, that I didn’t love her?”
“I’m saying you don’t love her. You love the idea of her. Don’t talk to me about fucking over a best friend, because you screwed me over from the beginning.”
“From what beginning?”
“You knew that I loved her. Everyone loved her. But you had to have her. At least I was man enough to walk away and give you a chance. I thought you would be the better man. I thought you’d be what she needed. Some idiot I was, I’ve seen dogs treated better.”
Now even more defensive, Derek fired back, “What about you? You cheated on her too. Don’t blame me for your fuck ups and don’t lecture me on ruining things with her. You think I don’t know? You think I don’t think about it every day? I didn’t just wake up yesterday and decide that I was an idiot and I wanted her back. I’ve loved her for years. Sure, I’ve made mistakes. But who hasn’t? Things aren’t over with her and me, yet. So don’t push me because they are with you. You lost her because you couldn’t handle the responsibility of loving someone more than yourself.”
Instantly Mark changed his tone, he stopped yelling and plainly stated, “See, that ‘s where you’re wrong. You can’t lose what you never had. And she was never mine. She loved you. She wanted you. That’s my point.”
Now pointing at him, Mark continued, “Things never worked between you two because you were never able to look past what you wanted. So just let her go, Derek. If you can’t be there day in and day out, and love her more than yourself than don’t even start with her. Don’t make promises that you can’t keep.”
Derek was furious, “Let her go? You’re one to talk about letting things go. It’s been sixteen years, Mark. And it’s never going to happen between you two. You know it, I know it, she knows it, and hell even Izzie knows it. It’s your wedding day. You’re getting married in twenty minutes and you’re still hoping that she’ll walk through that door any second and give you an excuse to not walk down that isle.”
Mark waited to respond. Derek’s honesty stung. For moments, all he could do was stand there and let silence hang in the air.
Shrugging his shoulders, he sincerely admitted, “You’re right, I am. I can’t help it. I’m always going to be waiting for her. The difference is, I respect that we can’t be together. I love her enough to let her go. I know she’ll never love me back the same way. I want her be happy and if it can’t be with me than I want the best for her. I love her regardless of the fact that I can’t be with her, not in spite of it like you.”
By this time both men were almost sure that their voices had carried out into the hall. Furious, both looked disheveled, as if they were ready to do more than talk out their differences.
“Shit, what am I suppose to do Mark? Pretend that I don’t love her and I don’t want to be with her? Forget all of that history? Let her be happy with someone else because I might hurt her again?”
Mark was true to his word. He wanted the best for Addison. Although he loved Derek like a brother, he wouldn’t watch him repeat history and destroy her, just to fulfill his own need.
“Yes, be an adult for once and do what’s best for her. Not for yourself. That’s love, Derek. It’s not endless unfulfilled promises. It’s action.”
Then, to show his seriousness and make his point, Mark sternly turned back the mirror and continued working on his tie.
Addison shifted in her seat. It was ten minutes until the service began and for some reason she couldn’t keep still. It was almost as if she had forgotten something and all she could do was try to place what was missing.
“Is something the matter?”
Madeline covered Addison’s hand.
“What is it? You’ve been twisting that program in your hands for the past five minutes.”
Looking down, Addison wasn’t aware that she had been doing anything at all with her hands.
“I feel like I forgot something; like I need to do something.”
“Did you leave something at the house?”
“No, that’s not it.”
Opening the door, Derek wasn’t sure whether or not he was surprised to see Addison.
“Hey… what’s going on?”
Pushing the door open a little she answered, “I need a moment with Mark. Do you mind?”
Derek was a little confused. Had she come to stop him?
“A… yeah, sure. No problem.”
Letting her in Derek watched as Mark and her made eye contact.
“I’ll go see if they’re ready yet.”
Watching Addison smile at him as he closed the door, Derek hoped that he wasn’t shutting the door on his future.
Addison ran her hands over her hair and smoothed out her dress. With a small smile she approached Mark.
“I thought you might want to cash in your favor.”
Although her statement was a little ambiguous, Mark knew exactly what she was talking about.
“I can’t seem to get my tie strait.”
His hands were shaking as she walked over and covered them with her own.
“I got it,” she whispered.
Mark let out a ragged sigh, “Give me a reason.”
“She’s beautiful and a great cook. Izzie has an amazing sense of humor. She’s a kind and generous-“
Mark again covered Addison’s hands, “That wasn’t the reason I was talking about.”
With her head down, Addison knew he was starring at her; waiting for her response.
Quietly, she answered, “I know.”
He let go of her hands, and listened to her continue, “You’ll have adorable children… and she loves you very much. She’s waiting for you.”
“I need you, Addie.”
Finishing, she ran her hands over his shoulders; smoothing out wrinkles.
Looking up, there were tears in her eyes, “Well here I am. You can do it, Mark.”
“I don’t know if I can, without you.”
She touched the side of his face and smiled, “Don’t you see? You don’t have too. I’m only a phone call away. Good friends are forever.”
After a few moments without words, he spoke first, “We would have had a beautiful little girl or boy. We would have been happy. I would have loved you forever.”
Wiping her eyes Addison answered, “In another life.”
He bushed his thumb over her cheek bones, “Why not this one?”
“Because, there is beautiful woman out there dressed in white,” Addison’s voice cracked, “And she’s waiting for, you. She waiting to make all of your dreams come true.”
Mark’s eyes began to water as tears ran down her face.
“Not all of them,” he softly replied.
“But the important ones,” she answered.
“What about you? What about your dreams?”
Addison laughed a little and wiped her cheeks, “The jury’s still out.”
“I’m getting married, Addie.”
Her vision blurred as tears spilled out onto her skin, “I know.”
Both wrapped their arms around each other and just held one another for moment.
Addison dug face into Mark’s shoulder, “I just can’t give you what you want. I’m sorry, Mark. I wish I could but it wouldn’t be fare to you.”
Mark buried his face in her hair and breathed in her scent for the last time, “There’s someone out of there for you. He’s arrogant, self- centered and a pain in the ass. But he’s also a dreamer and an eternal optimist. He loves you very much. He always has. He just hasn’t always been aware of it.”
Sniffling, she answered, “Someone famous once said you can never go home.”
Mark laughed a little at her absurdity, and let go, “Then don’t. Stay here in Seattle.”
When Addison looked up at him, her blue eyes seemed to glow,” I’m not talking about LA. He’s home. Where ever he is will always be home for me.”
Mark brushed a strand of hair behind her ear, “Well whoever they were, they must have never been in love.”
“You think?”
“I tell you what I know. I love you and there will always be a place in my life for you. I know he isn’t good enough for you. But I don’t think anyone is, Addison. If he makes you happy then do it. Take the chance.”
“I don’t know if I can waste another sixteen years of my life on someone who might leave me again.”
Mark leaned in and kissed her on the cheek. Lingering he answered, “When you love someone enough, you’ll waste forever. If only just to spend one more minute with them.”
“You know what I know Mark?”
“What?”
“You’ll be a wonderful husband. Izzie’s a lucky woman. I know you’ll be happy.”
A knock sounded on the door.
“Um… it’s starting.”
Mark tried to discretely wipe his eyes, “I’ll love you forever Addison.”
“Dido.”
Standing next to Mark at the altar, Derek cleared his throat, “Everything’s okay?”
Glancing sideways, Mark ran his tongue over his lips as if they were dry, “I hope you two are happy together. Do what’s best for her.”
Derek felt a wave of relief wash over him, “Thanks, I will.”
As the wedding procession started Derek searched the crowd for Addison. Sitting next to his mother she looked beautiful in a scoop neck, aqua, Chanel dress. When she smiled back at him his stomach tightened. His previous feelings of relief washed away as Mark’s request rang in his ears.
“Do what’s best for her not for yourself.”
A/N: This is Mark and Addison’s last real talk. Although she doesn’t end up with him in this one, I thought it was only fitting that they have their last talk and finalize things. Up next Addison and Derek have a steamy encounter and Derek thinks about what’s best for Addison. Also next chapter Callie will defiantly have the baby. And Mark and Izzie will have a moment. Thanks for reading and the Maddison update will be really soon.
I Can’t Make You Love Me
Turn down the lights
Turn down the bed
Turn down these voices
inside my head Lay down with me
Tell me no lies
Just hold me close,
don't patronize
Don't patronize me
Cause I can't make you love me
if you don't
You can't make your heart feel
something it won't
Here in the dark
in these final hours
I will lay down my heart
And I'll feel the power
but you won't
No, you won't
Cause I can't make you love me
if you don't
I'll close my eyes
then I won't see
the love you don't feel
when you're holding me
Morning will come
and I'll do what's right
just give me till then
to give up this fight
and I will give up this fight
Cause I can't make you love me
if you don't
You can't make your heart feel
something it won't
Here in the dark
in these final hours
I will lay down my heart
And I'll feel the power
but you won't
No, you won't
Cause I can't make you love me
if you don't