Marriage

[gabbrgrrl]

He asks me "Do you like our life?" and "Are you happy

Comments

[bellajellybean]

*hugs* It's hard work to keep a marriage going, and it's even harder if you're the only one doing any of the work. :(

[amphitrite27]

This is always a hard decision, and its one that I think any sane couple thinks about, since having people in our lives whether family, friends, coworkers, spouses is work

[gabbrgrrl]

I don't get the feeling he's "self-care"-ing, more that he's just selfish.

He asked me ONE TIME to make sure to close the bathroom cabinet door because he was banging his head on it (he's much taller than I). Every morning, I make sure before I leave the bathroom that it is closed.

I reminded him of that the other night. He conceded that it's true - that those things just go out of his head.

It's one of those things that I am just frustrated about right now. It's not really something that's divorce worthy LOL

[amphitrite27]

I just have a different perspective I think on some of the house frustration issues, as I have spent the last decade always living with people, usually people that I am not dating (although now I'm living both with other people and someone I'm dating

[amphitrite27]

I also really recommend NVC (nonviolent communication) for situations like this. NVC is based on the idea that people may have trouble communicating the need behind a request, which may make it harder for someone to fulfill that need. NVC is also based on the assumption that most people want the people around them to be happy (which I think is true), but that either our requests don't match our needs (because we make jumps in our heads between needs and actions that may not be the right jumps) and that our method of requesting is less an invitation (which makes most people want to help) and a demand (which shuts most people down

[adazzledim]

I wish I had words of wisdom for you, but the best I can do is commiserate. My hubby? Freaking unemployed and still finds time *every* day to play Halo. Hasn't worked since May, is at home alone all day, and never lifts so much as a finger around the house. And I still have to come home and make dinner. While I'm seven months pregnant and struggling to stay on top of it all. So, yeah. I know we love them, and they can be wonderfully sweet, but why do we have to put up with their shit? Let's run away together. (I had planned to take this in a different direction and end with a thought about how I love him anyway, but then I started thinking, and - well, you see where it went.) :-/

[gabbrgrrl]

I do think you're pretty cute...

[adazzledim]

Tease. :-P