Heroes fic: How You Sleep (2/12?)
Title: How You Sleep - Chapter Two: Starting Over (2/12?)
Series: Heroes
Pairing: Mylar
Rating: R
Warnings: Mpreg! BS science! Fairly dark! Consent issues!
Summary: After being doused with the complete formula, Mohinder copes with a lingering side effect as he and everyone around him try to rebuild their lives and their trust.
Prologue | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10
Settling into a facsimile of a normal life with a decent diet and plenty to do made things easier. The house was a musty mess, and together Mohinder and Maya cleaned it from top to bottom, wiping down even the walls. Mohinder felt grateful for all the hardwood flooring, as worn and bleached and cracked as it was in some places, given they couldn't get a vaccuum. It took three days, but they cleared out the dust and grime in each room, with the exception of the garage, which they agreed to close off as a health precaution. Unfortunately, a rainstorm showed that other areas of the house had leak problems, and they had to wait until the end of the week for a tube of caulk that the grocery store had luckily stocked as a special item.
They did retrieve the rake from the garage and cleared the leaves from around the house, though in some areas it might as well have been mulch. They discovered chains and a plank from a fallen swing under a tall oak tree in the front yard, and on the right side of the house they found a working hose that Maya suggested they use to wash the siding. On the opposite side of the house, they uncovered two tiny windows along the ground, peeking into a basement. They'd missed the door leading down to it in the side of the staircase. The door blended into the wood paneling and had lost its knob. Thankfully the basement wasn't horrifically moldy like the garage, but it held no surprises, only a water heater.
Into the second week, Mohinder felt he had been right-- with the place tidied up, it was more comfortable, lack of furnishings aside. Plus they were able to get some small entertainments like books and playing cards from the grocery store to keep their minds occupied when not busy with chores or discussing the future. At the same time, it occurred to Mohinder that all of it was near-pointless, especially talks about preparations for the baby. They had no idea how long they'd be in this house. The fear of being discovered hovered over them always.
They communicated with Rebel using the email account he'd set up for Mohinder, and while their mysterious benefactor would say little about what else he was doing to fight against the government, sometimes he would mention Peter and Matt. That was how Mohinder found out that Daphne was alive after all, only wounded-- and how later he learned that those wounds killed her anyway.
Mohinder knew little about her, really only that she had superspeed, she used to be a thief, and Matt was insistently in love with her. He'd had little problem with her staying in the apartment, given all the other people who'd stayed there and that he'd secluded himself to the loft most of the time he was not in his taxi.
Still, he remembered when Matt reintroduced them after Pinehearst and Primatech burnt down, how she'd stared at him with raised eyebrows and pursed lips. Eventually she'd reached out to shake his hand, saying, "Can't say I don't know Arthur had a habit of latching onto people who were down and out." Mohinder had always wondered if she actually wanted to give him another chance or if she just made an effort for Matt's benefit. Now he'd never find out.
He wished he could talk to Matt and see how he was coping with her death. After watching Matt turn those soldiers on one another and become subsequently hostile, Mohinder feared how quickly he could be set off. But there was no way to contact his friend, and Rebel did not answer questions about him.
@ @ @ @ @
They'd lived in the house for about a month when the grocery delivery boy came for the fifth time. Already Maya had developed a flirty rapport with him, coming out onto the porch to say, "Ah, you've come to see me again?" as the young man approached with bag-laden arms. Mohinder may have felt jealous if he wasn't so wary about a virtual stranger coming to their sanctuary. He watched cautiously as he hung their wet laundry on a line at the side of the house, thinking of the car keys and emergency stash of money (courtesy of Rebel) sitting on a shelf just inside the basement door. But as before, the boy stayed only a minute or so and left, his van kicking up dust on the road.
Maya called to Mohinder from the porch. "I broke our essentials rule," she said. She held up a bottle of wine. "It was cheap, though!"
Mohinder finished pinning the last sheet and picked up the basket. "That's not exactly a good idea for me."
Maya waved her free hand dismissively. "Once upon a time, women drank and smoked all the time when pregnant. Half a glass won't hurt." Mohinder followed her inside and she went on. "You are allowed one little hurrah while you watch out for fish and coffee and litter boxes and yadda-yadda."
They ate dinner-- a chicken breast and half a can of mixed vegetables each-- and then Mohinder carried the couch out onto the porch. ("Isn't heavy lifting a no-no?" Maya teased, carrying the wine and two plastic cups.) Daylight had nearly vanished behind the trees as they sat together. Maya poured him half a cup and a full one for herself.
"Shall we make a toast?" she asked.
"To not getting caught again?"
She smiled a little. "How about to the future?"
"I think that's called wishful thinking, not a toast," Mohinder said. At her frown he quickly added, "But, yes, it's better to remain optimistic."
She shook her head but "clinked" their cups. "To what lies ahead."
"To what lies ahead," he repeated.
As they discussed the possibility of more repairs to the house, Mohinder sipped his wine, but Maya drank hers down. She was on her second cup before Mohinder had halved his portion.
"Take it easy," he said.
She laughed, tipping the cup all the way back and swallowing. "I am."
"You don't need to be drunk if we get ambushed."
"I think you're just jealous," Maya replied, poking his stomach.
He smiled. "Perhaps a little."
"But you remain health-conscious!" she said, watching a stream of wine fill her cup again. "That makes you a good parent."
Mohinder thought of Molly, left with his mother in India. He'd called her once since Pinehearst. "I suppose we'll see."
Maya stared into her cup. "It would help if you gave yourself a chance." She glanced up at him. "Are you still afraid you're a monster?"
"Do you feel any differently about leaving me at Pinehearst?"
"Of course I don't, but I think with these circumstances--"
"These circumstances don't change the past."
"No, but they help set our path for the future."
"It's hard to imagine a path that mitigates murder."
She said nothing for a while and finished her third cup. She poured herself more. "I don't even know how many people are dead because of me."
"You didn't have control. Stressors--"
"How do you know that?"
Mohinder let out a laugh, because of course Maya would never hurt anyone on purpose. She turned her face away from the dark yard into the light coming from the window behind them. Mohinder couldn't hold the haunted gaze in her dark, pretty eyes, and the lips he knew to be soft and delicate took in a harsh breath.
"We were stopped at the border coming out of Mexico," she said quietly. "They were 'fake police,' militia men. They had guns, and I was scared, and I felt the death coming. I held it at bay with all I had. Alejandro... He tried to grab me, but Sylar stopped him. He told me to keep driving. He told me not to think about those men. I could have reached for Alejandro, but I didn't. I wanted to get into America, to get you to help me. Sylar told me not to think about those men, so I let my power go. I drove away. I let them die."
Mohinder had never heard any of this before. He struggled for something to say.
Clear tears ran down her face. "So if you are still a monster, is there hope for me?" she asked. "You were scared like I was, but you had your serum, your chemicals, things that changed you. But I have always been me." She turned her body toward him. "I was scared of you, but I know you want to do good, and if you can't, then I don't know that I..."
He carefully set his cup on the ground and touched her shoulder. "It's alright," he said. "Maya, you--"
"I forgive you, I do. If I can't forgive you, then how..." Suddenly she dropped her cup, wine spilling onto the porch, and her face fell into her hands. Mohinder murmured more attempts at comfort until she lifted her head again, staring at him strangely. He barely managed a protest as she cupped his face and pulled his mouth to hers. Surprised and flustered, he didn't move.
"Hm," Maya said, disappointed, as she pulled away and rested her head on his shoulder. "Definitely no pheromones."
Mohinder chuckled awkwardly.
"It's too bad," she said, wiping the tears from her face. "When I was little, I used to fantasize about a home like this, you know. A big, pretty life with a handsome husband and beautiful children. And I even wanted Alejandro to live with us." She sniffed and laughed a little. "I learned very fast the chances of having that life, but when I came here, after... when you invited me to live with you, you reminded me of that, of what I wanted to be..." She trailed off, then took in a deep breath. She interlocked their fingers. "I thought I could start over."
@ @ @ @ @
Mohinder wasn't sure of the time when he roused Maya and helped her upstairs into her bed. As he lay in his own, on top of the sheets in the summer heat, he turned on his side to stare out the window at the dotted black sky. He didn't think he deserved Maya's forgiveness; he didn't even know if she really felt that way sober.
He had difficulty imagining that she'd intentionally killed anyone. Reflexively, he wanted to blame Sylar's influence, but he knew all too well that a person's final decision was his or her own. Still, could he ever see Maya as beyond redemption, when she'd reacted so strongly to Mohinder's crimes? When coping with a power like she had would clearly affect her judgment?
A pale arm wrapped around Mohinder's waist and held him tightly against a cool body. "If only I had such favor," a low voice rumbled against the back of his neck. Mohinder managed only a cringe before another arm pushed under his shoulder to wrap around his chest. "Hard to get?"
"I don't want you here."
Sylar's warm breath moved to Mohinder's ear. "Not even to save you from Nathan's thugs? I could do it so... efficiently. Maybe I'd be nice and bring Maya along too."
Mohinder gritted his teeth. "You'd leave her behind as a decoy. Or just for fun."
Sylar chuckled. "We think so alike."
"I'm not a psychopath."
"Well, not anymore, I guess. But see, isn't that interesting? Maya gets the emotional and mental distress sympathy, but what do we get? Weren't you mentally unwell? Wasn't I? You read the Company file. 'Inclusion of foreign DNA into subject's genome has corrupted his mind.'"
"You killed before foreign DNA was even an issue."
"Hm. Everyone makes mistakes."
"As if you ever really felt remorse," Mohinder spat. "When you had the chance to start over, you rejected it."
Fingers played in his hair. "You can't say I didn't try. I gave you what you wanted."
Mohinder pulled his arms closer to his body, one hand fisting in the pillow case. "It shouldn't have happened."
"Is that what you tell yourself?" The hand at Mohinder's waist rubbed lightly at his stomach under his shirt. "What you'll tell the child?"
"I won't tell it anything."
"So you'll lie? A wonderful parenting basis."
"As if you would know."
Sylar chuckled, nuzzling Mohinder's neck. "I know how to take care of what I want," he murmured. "If I knew you were here, wouldn't I come get you?"
"You're dead."
"But if I wasn't, would you give in to me to keep the child safe?" He pulled Mohinder tighter against him. "You can fight, but you know I can fight so much more effectively." Teeth grazed Mohinder's skin. "After all, I wouldn't want someone taking my things."
"I'm not your thing."
"Yet here we are," Sylar said. The hand on Mohinder's stomach moved down, brushing the trail of hair leading to his groin. "And don't talk as if you don't want me, like those occasional fantasies don't mean anything. They wouldn't make you feel so sick otherwise."
Sick and wrong. This baby shouldn't exist. There shouldn't be any proof of the warped emotions Mohinder kept to himself, proof that he'd eventually acted on them. And as Sylar's hand moved from Mohinder's stomach to his thigh, curling around the scarring burn from Bennet's taser, Mohinder thought about that electricity shooting through his body, lighting up his vision, and blowing out his brain. And after that had been the plane crash, the pain still crushing his reinforced body as he hit the walls. Maybe it had all been too much. Maybe the endless worrying was for nothing. Maybe he'd gotten lucky.
Sylar scolded him lightly. "What an awful thing to wish!" His hand slid back upwards to Mohinder's waistband. "But you know it's just fine." The hand slipped beneath the fabric and curled around Mohinder's penis. Mohinder closed his eyes and pressed the side of his face into the pillow. "You could never get away from me, Mohinder, and now you never will."
@ @ @ @ @
Mohinder opened his eyes. The sky was a dusty blue, still a ways from sunrise. The temperature had gone cool, but he could take no pleasure from it with his erection straining against his pants. He laid there and tried to ignore it, but after a while he gave up. He got out of bed and went into the bathroom, turning on the shower. He forced himself under the icy spray.
Sylar may have been dead, his ashes carted off to who knew where with the Primatech rubble, but still Mohinder did not want to give in to him. He tried to push back against those few secret memories, clear his head, let himself feel only the chill of the water, but the cold only seemed to exaggerate how hard he felt. Mohinder turned the knobs until the water ran hot, and he pressed his forearm against the stall wall and ducked his head. He took himself in hand, trying to think of Mira, of Maya, of some pretty, pouty stranger, but Sylar's phantom warmth swirled with the sudden steam, filling Mohinder's lungs with each breath. He came quietly with a violent shudder and opened his eyes to watch the filthy evidence run down the drain.
He scrubbed his hair and his body, but spent the last twenty minutes of the shower on the floor with his arms around his legs and his face tucked into his knees.
@ @ @ @ @
The house had no television, but after checking Mohinder's email, he and Maya would spend a little time glossing over the news, looking for any hints about the hunt for specials that would fill in Rebel's blanks. Of course, the operation was covert, so speculation remained their primary tool over the passing weeks.
Then one evening they found themselves watching a news clip regarding leaked video of alleged American citizens taken prisoner and loaded onto a military plane. Mohinder watched the hooded orange figures file on board, but he could not pick himself out among them. The bald man who'd abducted him-- Danko, Rebel had called him-- was easier to identify. Mohinder had mentioned the plane crash to Maya, but she still watched the video with a hand over her mouth. When the clip ended, she expressed hope that investigation from the media would help stop the abductions.
The following evening took a turn for the worse, as they discovered that as they'd watched the prisoners clip, Matt had been in Washington, DC with a bomb strapped to his chest. Another video showed Matt surrounded by a SWAT team and a bomb squad. Mohinder had a moment of horror, that Matt had really snapped, until the camera zoomed in for a moment at the terrified look on his face. Mohinder suddenly realized this must have been a contingency plan for the round-up video. The government had the opportunity to stress that no rights had been violated, because these people were criminals, domestic terrorists.
The scene changed as Nathan appeared, looking convincingly shocked. The cameras were too far away to capture what he and Matt shouted at each other, leaving Mohinder to wonder wildly what was happening. Maya leaned over the table as she watched, her hands tightly gripping the edge. Finally, Nathan reached over to Matt, yanked something from the contraption strapped around the other man's chest, and followed up by punching him out cold.
The video flashed back to the reporter in the studio. "The terrorist suspect was then taken into custody. Senator Petrelli declined to comment on his heroic actions."
Mohinder slapped the laptop closed in disgust. "Yes, a fine, upstanding American." How could Nathan participate in such a horrible ruse?
There were no reports for weeks after that, until one day they read an article about a press conference in which Nathan accused the president of being soft on terrorism. "I know a way to bring real purpose back to the White House, back to this country," the article quoted, "and I promise you that when the President agrees to meet with me, when he agrees to shake my hand, real change will come to this country, and nothing will ever be the same."
"What is he up to?" Maya asked. "The President must be cooperating so much already. How much worse can he make this?"
Mohinder reflexively wrapped an arm around the small mound of his stomach. "I don't know. I can't even understand how he could take all of this so far, especially with Peter."
They tried to get information from Rebel, but instead of a vague or dodging reply, they received no reply at all.
@ @ @ @ @
Everything abruptly changed the next day. When they checked the news sites, they discovered that the meeting between the President and Nathan had been attacked, though by who the Secret Service would not disclose. But the most important thing was the press conference they watched as it streamed live later. Peter stood beside Nathan as the senator addressed the reporters.
"This incident only strengthens my argument about our nation's security issues. However, despite this incident, I have spoken with the President about my proposed overhaul, and he agreed to do what he can to supply the necessary resources in the interest of making our great country and its citizens safer..."
"What is happening?" Maya asked.
"I think... it's over?" Mohinder replied, unable to believe it himself. But there Peter stood, looking positively content, and as he and Nathan left the podium, Mohinder could see Angela and Matt waiting for him in the wings. Then the video switched to talking heads, and Mohinder closed the window.
"Well... what do we do now?" Maya asked. "We can't just go home. Our things were taken. Our apartments have probably been rented to other people. I don't think I have a job anymore."
"We're still okay here," Mohinder said, still trying to process that they could now leave the house without fear. "And if we're not being hunted, I'm sure Rebel will contact us soon. We'll figure it out." Unless something had happened to their benefactor before Nathan's about-face.
But there was nothing to worry about. Two days later, Rebel sent an email reply, telling them to watch for a package. It arrived by FedEx in the afternoon, and they opened it in the dining room, finding a prepaid cell phone, more cash, and a letter.
MOHINDER AND MAYA:
SORRY FOR THE RADIO SILENCE. I GOT CAUGHT UP IN A BAD SITUATION. BUT AS YOU PROBABLY SAW ON THE NEWS, WE'RE ALL IN THE CLEAR. :)
I KNOW YOU'VE BEEN WORRIED ABOUT YOUR FRIENDS, SO THE PHONE IS TO CALL PETER PETRELLI. HE'S BEEN STAYING WITH HIS MOM. I KNOW THE NUMBER IS UNLISTED: 212-555-9256. I'M SURE HE CAN FILL YOU IN ON EVERYTHING.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT NATHAN PETRELLI'S PLAN FOR RE-ESTABLISHING EVERYONE IS YET, BUT LET ME KNOW HOW I CAN HELP. YOU CAN STAY IN THE HOUSE AS LONG AS YOU NEED.
ENJOY FREEDOM, AND GOOD LUCK WITH THE BABY!
- REBEL
"You'd think he'd finally give us his name," Maya said.
"I suppose it's a precaution in case he has to help people like this again," Mohinder suggested.
"Don't even say that! This is not something I want to relive." She glanced at him. "Ah, no offense."
Mohinder laughed. "Well, I will miss your cooking."
She perked up, remembering. "I better finish dinner." She'd dropped what she was doing when the package arrived. "Why don't you call Peter now?"
Mohinder already had the phone in his hand. "That sounds excellent." As she pushed through the door into the kitchen, he called after her. "You're not going to use garlic this time, are you?"
She called back with a wry laugh, "I do not want to clean a mess like that again."
Mohinder blushed and dialed the number in the letter. He was barely sure what to say, what to ask, and felt even more off-kilter when Angela coolly answered. She at least seemed vaguely pleased that he was alive, and told him that Peter wasn't home-- he was with Nathan-- but she was willing to tell him about the story behind the meeting with the President. It turned out Nathan's flight had been exposed to Danko, and he became one of the hunted (a thought that did not arouse any sympathy in Mohinder). The person who wanted to meet with the President was actually a shapeshifting Sylar, who'd been working with Danko.
Mohinder felt like all the blood left his body, cold except for a persistent warmth in his abdomen. "Sylar... Sylar is alive?" You could never get away from me.
"Well, I haven't finished," Angela replied briskly. "We went to stop him-- myself, my sons, Claire, and Noah. Nathan got them to stop the meeting at the hotel, and he and Peter pursued Sylar after that, but he got away and tried to get to the President by impersonating his advisor. Unfortunately for Sylar, Peter had acquired his shapeshifting earlier. I imagine it was quite a shock when the President turned out to be my son. Regardless, Peter tranquilized him, and well, we certainly couldn't keep him around. We burned the body."
Mohinder felt a headache coming on. "So you had him alive, but then you..."
"Peter wanted you to see," Angela said, "but we didn't know where you were, of course, and time was of the essence."
"No, I understand," Mohinder said, pressing his hand to his head and staring down at the swell of his stomach. "It just wasn't something I expected to hear."
"Well, it's sorry business that's finally over with," she replied. "All of it. On that matter, Nathan is working on pulling everyone's lives back together. It's only proper to invite you to stay here until we can get back your belongings and arrange things as they were."
Her voice sounded hardly concerned. This was mostly likely Peter's invitation. Still, Mohinder felt comfortable staying in Iowa with Maya until all was back in order. "Oh, I- I couldn't--" he tried.
"Peter is very eager to see you," Angela interrupted. "And Nathan wishes to share his deepest apologies."
Mohinder almost choked on his own incredulity. What exactly did Nathan expect to say to just smooth everything over? But he did very much want to see Peter and Matt again. "Maya Herrerra is here with--"
"We'll be happy to accommodate her as well," Angela replied, sounding bored now.
"Thank you very much," Mohinder said. "When should we--"
"Give me your number and I'll call you back with arrangements," she said. Mohinder rattled it off, and she went on. "I expect we'll have you on your way in a couple of days. I will speak with you again soon, doctor."
They exchanged goodbyes. Mohinder set the phone on the table and placed his hand on his stomach as he tried to convince the uneasy feeling in his shoulders to go away. Maya came in then, carrying two plates of pasta.
"What's the matter?" she asked, quickly setting down their dinner and kneeling at his side. "Is it the smell? Do you need the trash can?"
He was fine. He had to be fine. So Sylar had been alive, had been capable of re-entering Mohinder's life. Now he was dead, for certain, with witnesses. The revelation was just another reason to be grateful Peter urged Mohinder to go out on on his own and find safe quarters.
"What did Peter say?" Maya pressed.
"It was his mother, and it wasn't anything." Mohinder smiled for her. "I'm just feeling tired and relieved."
She smiled back. "I can sympathize," she replied, taking her seat. "So what did she tell you?"
He hesitated. "I didn't get many details. Maybe you should wait until you can hear it from Peter."
"When will he be here?"
Mohinder shook his head. "I mean when we get to New York. Angela Petrelli has invited us to stay."
"Oh." Maya looked away awkwardly. "I didn't know you expected me to come with you."
Mohinder rubbed the back of his neck. "Oh, no, I'm sorry for being presumptuous. I just thought... You said you didn't have anywhere to go, so it made sense. I'd feel odd just leaving you here."
Maya shrugged and poked her fork around her dinner. "I'll be fine. I'd feel odd abandoning this house after all the work we put into it. Besides, I want to talk with Rebel about what he thinks he can do for me."
"The Petrellis can help get your old life back, all your things..."
"My life in New Jersey wasn't anything special," she said. "I wasn't even there that long." The corner of her mouth quirked up. "I didn't have all that many things anyway."
"I see."
"And I don't know any of your friends, Mohinder. I would feel strange." She laughed a little. "And I'm not all that eager to meet the man responsible for treating us like rats to be drowned, even if he had a change of heart."
"I understand," Mohinder said. "Then I suppose I'll be out of your hair soon."
"You know that's not how I feel about our time here."
"I know, but... I can't thank you enough, Maya," Mohinder blurted out. "I didn't deserve kindness from you at all. I'll always be grateful."
He thought she was going to scold him for prostrating himself, but instead she said, "Well, it helps that you're an excellent washmaid." He couldn't help but laugh, and it helped his mood lift a little. Maya reached across the table and placed her hand over his. "We can move on to something better now," she said. "Believe that. I think this baby is a challenge from God, Mohinder. I know you will meet it."
Series: Heroes
Pairing: Mylar
Rating: R
Warnings: Mpreg! BS science! Fairly dark! Consent issues!
Summary: After being doused with the complete formula, Mohinder copes with a lingering side effect as he and everyone around him try to rebuild their lives and their trust.
Prologue | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10
Settling into a facsimile of a normal life with a decent diet and plenty to do made things easier. The house was a musty mess, and together Mohinder and Maya cleaned it from top to bottom, wiping down even the walls. Mohinder felt grateful for all the hardwood flooring, as worn and bleached and cracked as it was in some places, given they couldn't get a vaccuum. It took three days, but they cleared out the dust and grime in each room, with the exception of the garage, which they agreed to close off as a health precaution. Unfortunately, a rainstorm showed that other areas of the house had leak problems, and they had to wait until the end of the week for a tube of caulk that the grocery store had luckily stocked as a special item.
They did retrieve the rake from the garage and cleared the leaves from around the house, though in some areas it might as well have been mulch. They discovered chains and a plank from a fallen swing under a tall oak tree in the front yard, and on the right side of the house they found a working hose that Maya suggested they use to wash the siding. On the opposite side of the house, they uncovered two tiny windows along the ground, peeking into a basement. They'd missed the door leading down to it in the side of the staircase. The door blended into the wood paneling and had lost its knob. Thankfully the basement wasn't horrifically moldy like the garage, but it held no surprises, only a water heater.
Into the second week, Mohinder felt he had been right-- with the place tidied up, it was more comfortable, lack of furnishings aside. Plus they were able to get some small entertainments like books and playing cards from the grocery store to keep their minds occupied when not busy with chores or discussing the future. At the same time, it occurred to Mohinder that all of it was near-pointless, especially talks about preparations for the baby. They had no idea how long they'd be in this house. The fear of being discovered hovered over them always.
They communicated with Rebel using the email account he'd set up for Mohinder, and while their mysterious benefactor would say little about what else he was doing to fight against the government, sometimes he would mention Peter and Matt. That was how Mohinder found out that Daphne was alive after all, only wounded-- and how later he learned that those wounds killed her anyway.
Mohinder knew little about her, really only that she had superspeed, she used to be a thief, and Matt was insistently in love with her. He'd had little problem with her staying in the apartment, given all the other people who'd stayed there and that he'd secluded himself to the loft most of the time he was not in his taxi.
Still, he remembered when Matt reintroduced them after Pinehearst and Primatech burnt down, how she'd stared at him with raised eyebrows and pursed lips. Eventually she'd reached out to shake his hand, saying, "Can't say I don't know Arthur had a habit of latching onto people who were down and out." Mohinder had always wondered if she actually wanted to give him another chance or if she just made an effort for Matt's benefit. Now he'd never find out.
He wished he could talk to Matt and see how he was coping with her death. After watching Matt turn those soldiers on one another and become subsequently hostile, Mohinder feared how quickly he could be set off. But there was no way to contact his friend, and Rebel did not answer questions about him.
@ @ @ @ @
They'd lived in the house for about a month when the grocery delivery boy came for the fifth time. Already Maya had developed a flirty rapport with him, coming out onto the porch to say, "Ah, you've come to see me again?" as the young man approached with bag-laden arms. Mohinder may have felt jealous if he wasn't so wary about a virtual stranger coming to their sanctuary. He watched cautiously as he hung their wet laundry on a line at the side of the house, thinking of the car keys and emergency stash of money (courtesy of Rebel) sitting on a shelf just inside the basement door. But as before, the boy stayed only a minute or so and left, his van kicking up dust on the road.
Maya called to Mohinder from the porch. "I broke our essentials rule," she said. She held up a bottle of wine. "It was cheap, though!"
Mohinder finished pinning the last sheet and picked up the basket. "That's not exactly a good idea for me."
Maya waved her free hand dismissively. "Once upon a time, women drank and smoked all the time when pregnant. Half a glass won't hurt." Mohinder followed her inside and she went on. "You are allowed one little hurrah while you watch out for fish and coffee and litter boxes and yadda-yadda."
They ate dinner-- a chicken breast and half a can of mixed vegetables each-- and then Mohinder carried the couch out onto the porch. ("Isn't heavy lifting a no-no?" Maya teased, carrying the wine and two plastic cups.) Daylight had nearly vanished behind the trees as they sat together. Maya poured him half a cup and a full one for herself.
"Shall we make a toast?" she asked.
"To not getting caught again?"
She smiled a little. "How about to the future?"
"I think that's called wishful thinking, not a toast," Mohinder said. At her frown he quickly added, "But, yes, it's better to remain optimistic."
She shook her head but "clinked" their cups. "To what lies ahead."
"To what lies ahead," he repeated.
As they discussed the possibility of more repairs to the house, Mohinder sipped his wine, but Maya drank hers down. She was on her second cup before Mohinder had halved his portion.
"Take it easy," he said.
She laughed, tipping the cup all the way back and swallowing. "I am."
"You don't need to be drunk if we get ambushed."
"I think you're just jealous," Maya replied, poking his stomach.
He smiled. "Perhaps a little."
"But you remain health-conscious!" she said, watching a stream of wine fill her cup again. "That makes you a good parent."
Mohinder thought of Molly, left with his mother in India. He'd called her once since Pinehearst. "I suppose we'll see."
Maya stared into her cup. "It would help if you gave yourself a chance." She glanced up at him. "Are you still afraid you're a monster?"
"Do you feel any differently about leaving me at Pinehearst?"
"Of course I don't, but I think with these circumstances--"
"These circumstances don't change the past."
"No, but they help set our path for the future."
"It's hard to imagine a path that mitigates murder."
She said nothing for a while and finished her third cup. She poured herself more. "I don't even know how many people are dead because of me."
"You didn't have control. Stressors--"
"How do you know that?"
Mohinder let out a laugh, because of course Maya would never hurt anyone on purpose. She turned her face away from the dark yard into the light coming from the window behind them. Mohinder couldn't hold the haunted gaze in her dark, pretty eyes, and the lips he knew to be soft and delicate took in a harsh breath.
"We were stopped at the border coming out of Mexico," she said quietly. "They were 'fake police,' militia men. They had guns, and I was scared, and I felt the death coming. I held it at bay with all I had. Alejandro... He tried to grab me, but Sylar stopped him. He told me to keep driving. He told me not to think about those men. I could have reached for Alejandro, but I didn't. I wanted to get into America, to get you to help me. Sylar told me not to think about those men, so I let my power go. I drove away. I let them die."
Mohinder had never heard any of this before. He struggled for something to say.
Clear tears ran down her face. "So if you are still a monster, is there hope for me?" she asked. "You were scared like I was, but you had your serum, your chemicals, things that changed you. But I have always been me." She turned her body toward him. "I was scared of you, but I know you want to do good, and if you can't, then I don't know that I..."
He carefully set his cup on the ground and touched her shoulder. "It's alright," he said. "Maya, you--"
"I forgive you, I do. If I can't forgive you, then how..." Suddenly she dropped her cup, wine spilling onto the porch, and her face fell into her hands. Mohinder murmured more attempts at comfort until she lifted her head again, staring at him strangely. He barely managed a protest as she cupped his face and pulled his mouth to hers. Surprised and flustered, he didn't move.
"Hm," Maya said, disappointed, as she pulled away and rested her head on his shoulder. "Definitely no pheromones."
Mohinder chuckled awkwardly.
"It's too bad," she said, wiping the tears from her face. "When I was little, I used to fantasize about a home like this, you know. A big, pretty life with a handsome husband and beautiful children. And I even wanted Alejandro to live with us." She sniffed and laughed a little. "I learned very fast the chances of having that life, but when I came here, after... when you invited me to live with you, you reminded me of that, of what I wanted to be..." She trailed off, then took in a deep breath. She interlocked their fingers. "I thought I could start over."
@ @ @ @ @
Mohinder wasn't sure of the time when he roused Maya and helped her upstairs into her bed. As he lay in his own, on top of the sheets in the summer heat, he turned on his side to stare out the window at the dotted black sky. He didn't think he deserved Maya's forgiveness; he didn't even know if she really felt that way sober.
He had difficulty imagining that she'd intentionally killed anyone. Reflexively, he wanted to blame Sylar's influence, but he knew all too well that a person's final decision was his or her own. Still, could he ever see Maya as beyond redemption, when she'd reacted so strongly to Mohinder's crimes? When coping with a power like she had would clearly affect her judgment?
A pale arm wrapped around Mohinder's waist and held him tightly against a cool body. "If only I had such favor," a low voice rumbled against the back of his neck. Mohinder managed only a cringe before another arm pushed under his shoulder to wrap around his chest. "Hard to get?"
"I don't want you here."
Sylar's warm breath moved to Mohinder's ear. "Not even to save you from Nathan's thugs? I could do it so... efficiently. Maybe I'd be nice and bring Maya along too."
Mohinder gritted his teeth. "You'd leave her behind as a decoy. Or just for fun."
Sylar chuckled. "We think so alike."
"I'm not a psychopath."
"Well, not anymore, I guess. But see, isn't that interesting? Maya gets the emotional and mental distress sympathy, but what do we get? Weren't you mentally unwell? Wasn't I? You read the Company file. 'Inclusion of foreign DNA into subject's genome has corrupted his mind.'"
"You killed before foreign DNA was even an issue."
"Hm. Everyone makes mistakes."
"As if you ever really felt remorse," Mohinder spat. "When you had the chance to start over, you rejected it."
Fingers played in his hair. "You can't say I didn't try. I gave you what you wanted."
Mohinder pulled his arms closer to his body, one hand fisting in the pillow case. "It shouldn't have happened."
"Is that what you tell yourself?" The hand at Mohinder's waist rubbed lightly at his stomach under his shirt. "What you'll tell the child?"
"I won't tell it anything."
"So you'll lie? A wonderful parenting basis."
"As if you would know."
Sylar chuckled, nuzzling Mohinder's neck. "I know how to take care of what I want," he murmured. "If I knew you were here, wouldn't I come get you?"
"You're dead."
"But if I wasn't, would you give in to me to keep the child safe?" He pulled Mohinder tighter against him. "You can fight, but you know I can fight so much more effectively." Teeth grazed Mohinder's skin. "After all, I wouldn't want someone taking my things."
"I'm not your thing."
"Yet here we are," Sylar said. The hand on Mohinder's stomach moved down, brushing the trail of hair leading to his groin. "And don't talk as if you don't want me, like those occasional fantasies don't mean anything. They wouldn't make you feel so sick otherwise."
Sick and wrong. This baby shouldn't exist. There shouldn't be any proof of the warped emotions Mohinder kept to himself, proof that he'd eventually acted on them. And as Sylar's hand moved from Mohinder's stomach to his thigh, curling around the scarring burn from Bennet's taser, Mohinder thought about that electricity shooting through his body, lighting up his vision, and blowing out his brain. And after that had been the plane crash, the pain still crushing his reinforced body as he hit the walls. Maybe it had all been too much. Maybe the endless worrying was for nothing. Maybe he'd gotten lucky.
Sylar scolded him lightly. "What an awful thing to wish!" His hand slid back upwards to Mohinder's waistband. "But you know it's just fine." The hand slipped beneath the fabric and curled around Mohinder's penis. Mohinder closed his eyes and pressed the side of his face into the pillow. "You could never get away from me, Mohinder, and now you never will."
@ @ @ @ @
Mohinder opened his eyes. The sky was a dusty blue, still a ways from sunrise. The temperature had gone cool, but he could take no pleasure from it with his erection straining against his pants. He laid there and tried to ignore it, but after a while he gave up. He got out of bed and went into the bathroom, turning on the shower. He forced himself under the icy spray.
Sylar may have been dead, his ashes carted off to who knew where with the Primatech rubble, but still Mohinder did not want to give in to him. He tried to push back against those few secret memories, clear his head, let himself feel only the chill of the water, but the cold only seemed to exaggerate how hard he felt. Mohinder turned the knobs until the water ran hot, and he pressed his forearm against the stall wall and ducked his head. He took himself in hand, trying to think of Mira, of Maya, of some pretty, pouty stranger, but Sylar's phantom warmth swirled with the sudden steam, filling Mohinder's lungs with each breath. He came quietly with a violent shudder and opened his eyes to watch the filthy evidence run down the drain.
He scrubbed his hair and his body, but spent the last twenty minutes of the shower on the floor with his arms around his legs and his face tucked into his knees.
@ @ @ @ @
The house had no television, but after checking Mohinder's email, he and Maya would spend a little time glossing over the news, looking for any hints about the hunt for specials that would fill in Rebel's blanks. Of course, the operation was covert, so speculation remained their primary tool over the passing weeks.
Then one evening they found themselves watching a news clip regarding leaked video of alleged American citizens taken prisoner and loaded onto a military plane. Mohinder watched the hooded orange figures file on board, but he could not pick himself out among them. The bald man who'd abducted him-- Danko, Rebel had called him-- was easier to identify. Mohinder had mentioned the plane crash to Maya, but she still watched the video with a hand over her mouth. When the clip ended, she expressed hope that investigation from the media would help stop the abductions.
The following evening took a turn for the worse, as they discovered that as they'd watched the prisoners clip, Matt had been in Washington, DC with a bomb strapped to his chest. Another video showed Matt surrounded by a SWAT team and a bomb squad. Mohinder had a moment of horror, that Matt had really snapped, until the camera zoomed in for a moment at the terrified look on his face. Mohinder suddenly realized this must have been a contingency plan for the round-up video. The government had the opportunity to stress that no rights had been violated, because these people were criminals, domestic terrorists.
The scene changed as Nathan appeared, looking convincingly shocked. The cameras were too far away to capture what he and Matt shouted at each other, leaving Mohinder to wonder wildly what was happening. Maya leaned over the table as she watched, her hands tightly gripping the edge. Finally, Nathan reached over to Matt, yanked something from the contraption strapped around the other man's chest, and followed up by punching him out cold.
The video flashed back to the reporter in the studio. "The terrorist suspect was then taken into custody. Senator Petrelli declined to comment on his heroic actions."
Mohinder slapped the laptop closed in disgust. "Yes, a fine, upstanding American." How could Nathan participate in such a horrible ruse?
There were no reports for weeks after that, until one day they read an article about a press conference in which Nathan accused the president of being soft on terrorism. "I know a way to bring real purpose back to the White House, back to this country," the article quoted, "and I promise you that when the President agrees to meet with me, when he agrees to shake my hand, real change will come to this country, and nothing will ever be the same."
"What is he up to?" Maya asked. "The President must be cooperating so much already. How much worse can he make this?"
Mohinder reflexively wrapped an arm around the small mound of his stomach. "I don't know. I can't even understand how he could take all of this so far, especially with Peter."
They tried to get information from Rebel, but instead of a vague or dodging reply, they received no reply at all.
@ @ @ @ @
Everything abruptly changed the next day. When they checked the news sites, they discovered that the meeting between the President and Nathan had been attacked, though by who the Secret Service would not disclose. But the most important thing was the press conference they watched as it streamed live later. Peter stood beside Nathan as the senator addressed the reporters.
"This incident only strengthens my argument about our nation's security issues. However, despite this incident, I have spoken with the President about my proposed overhaul, and he agreed to do what he can to supply the necessary resources in the interest of making our great country and its citizens safer..."
"What is happening?" Maya asked.
"I think... it's over?" Mohinder replied, unable to believe it himself. But there Peter stood, looking positively content, and as he and Nathan left the podium, Mohinder could see Angela and Matt waiting for him in the wings. Then the video switched to talking heads, and Mohinder closed the window.
"Well... what do we do now?" Maya asked. "We can't just go home. Our things were taken. Our apartments have probably been rented to other people. I don't think I have a job anymore."
"We're still okay here," Mohinder said, still trying to process that they could now leave the house without fear. "And if we're not being hunted, I'm sure Rebel will contact us soon. We'll figure it out." Unless something had happened to their benefactor before Nathan's about-face.
But there was nothing to worry about. Two days later, Rebel sent an email reply, telling them to watch for a package. It arrived by FedEx in the afternoon, and they opened it in the dining room, finding a prepaid cell phone, more cash, and a letter.
MOHINDER AND MAYA:
SORRY FOR THE RADIO SILENCE. I GOT CAUGHT UP IN A BAD SITUATION. BUT AS YOU PROBABLY SAW ON THE NEWS, WE'RE ALL IN THE CLEAR. :)
I KNOW YOU'VE BEEN WORRIED ABOUT YOUR FRIENDS, SO THE PHONE IS TO CALL PETER PETRELLI. HE'S BEEN STAYING WITH HIS MOM. I KNOW THE NUMBER IS UNLISTED: 212-555-9256. I'M SURE HE CAN FILL YOU IN ON EVERYTHING.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT NATHAN PETRELLI'S PLAN FOR RE-ESTABLISHING EVERYONE IS YET, BUT LET ME KNOW HOW I CAN HELP. YOU CAN STAY IN THE HOUSE AS LONG AS YOU NEED.
ENJOY FREEDOM, AND GOOD LUCK WITH THE BABY!
- REBEL
"You'd think he'd finally give us his name," Maya said.
"I suppose it's a precaution in case he has to help people like this again," Mohinder suggested.
"Don't even say that! This is not something I want to relive." She glanced at him. "Ah, no offense."
Mohinder laughed. "Well, I will miss your cooking."
She perked up, remembering. "I better finish dinner." She'd dropped what she was doing when the package arrived. "Why don't you call Peter now?"
Mohinder already had the phone in his hand. "That sounds excellent." As she pushed through the door into the kitchen, he called after her. "You're not going to use garlic this time, are you?"
She called back with a wry laugh, "I do not want to clean a mess like that again."
Mohinder blushed and dialed the number in the letter. He was barely sure what to say, what to ask, and felt even more off-kilter when Angela coolly answered. She at least seemed vaguely pleased that he was alive, and told him that Peter wasn't home-- he was with Nathan-- but she was willing to tell him about the story behind the meeting with the President. It turned out Nathan's flight had been exposed to Danko, and he became one of the hunted (a thought that did not arouse any sympathy in Mohinder). The person who wanted to meet with the President was actually a shapeshifting Sylar, who'd been working with Danko.
Mohinder felt like all the blood left his body, cold except for a persistent warmth in his abdomen. "Sylar... Sylar is alive?" You could never get away from me.
"Well, I haven't finished," Angela replied briskly. "We went to stop him-- myself, my sons, Claire, and Noah. Nathan got them to stop the meeting at the hotel, and he and Peter pursued Sylar after that, but he got away and tried to get to the President by impersonating his advisor. Unfortunately for Sylar, Peter had acquired his shapeshifting earlier. I imagine it was quite a shock when the President turned out to be my son. Regardless, Peter tranquilized him, and well, we certainly couldn't keep him around. We burned the body."
Mohinder felt a headache coming on. "So you had him alive, but then you..."
"Peter wanted you to see," Angela said, "but we didn't know where you were, of course, and time was of the essence."
"No, I understand," Mohinder said, pressing his hand to his head and staring down at the swell of his stomach. "It just wasn't something I expected to hear."
"Well, it's sorry business that's finally over with," she replied. "All of it. On that matter, Nathan is working on pulling everyone's lives back together. It's only proper to invite you to stay here until we can get back your belongings and arrange things as they were."
Her voice sounded hardly concerned. This was mostly likely Peter's invitation. Still, Mohinder felt comfortable staying in Iowa with Maya until all was back in order. "Oh, I- I couldn't--" he tried.
"Peter is very eager to see you," Angela interrupted. "And Nathan wishes to share his deepest apologies."
Mohinder almost choked on his own incredulity. What exactly did Nathan expect to say to just smooth everything over? But he did very much want to see Peter and Matt again. "Maya Herrerra is here with--"
"We'll be happy to accommodate her as well," Angela replied, sounding bored now.
"Thank you very much," Mohinder said. "When should we--"
"Give me your number and I'll call you back with arrangements," she said. Mohinder rattled it off, and she went on. "I expect we'll have you on your way in a couple of days. I will speak with you again soon, doctor."
They exchanged goodbyes. Mohinder set the phone on the table and placed his hand on his stomach as he tried to convince the uneasy feeling in his shoulders to go away. Maya came in then, carrying two plates of pasta.
"What's the matter?" she asked, quickly setting down their dinner and kneeling at his side. "Is it the smell? Do you need the trash can?"
He was fine. He had to be fine. So Sylar had been alive, had been capable of re-entering Mohinder's life. Now he was dead, for certain, with witnesses. The revelation was just another reason to be grateful Peter urged Mohinder to go out on on his own and find safe quarters.
"What did Peter say?" Maya pressed.
"It was his mother, and it wasn't anything." Mohinder smiled for her. "I'm just feeling tired and relieved."
She smiled back. "I can sympathize," she replied, taking her seat. "So what did she tell you?"
He hesitated. "I didn't get many details. Maybe you should wait until you can hear it from Peter."
"When will he be here?"
Mohinder shook his head. "I mean when we get to New York. Angela Petrelli has invited us to stay."
"Oh." Maya looked away awkwardly. "I didn't know you expected me to come with you."
Mohinder rubbed the back of his neck. "Oh, no, I'm sorry for being presumptuous. I just thought... You said you didn't have anywhere to go, so it made sense. I'd feel odd just leaving you here."
Maya shrugged and poked her fork around her dinner. "I'll be fine. I'd feel odd abandoning this house after all the work we put into it. Besides, I want to talk with Rebel about what he thinks he can do for me."
"The Petrellis can help get your old life back, all your things..."
"My life in New Jersey wasn't anything special," she said. "I wasn't even there that long." The corner of her mouth quirked up. "I didn't have all that many things anyway."
"I see."
"And I don't know any of your friends, Mohinder. I would feel strange." She laughed a little. "And I'm not all that eager to meet the man responsible for treating us like rats to be drowned, even if he had a change of heart."
"I understand," Mohinder said. "Then I suppose I'll be out of your hair soon."
"You know that's not how I feel about our time here."
"I know, but... I can't thank you enough, Maya," Mohinder blurted out. "I didn't deserve kindness from you at all. I'll always be grateful."
He thought she was going to scold him for prostrating himself, but instead she said, "Well, it helps that you're an excellent washmaid." He couldn't help but laugh, and it helped his mood lift a little. Maya reached across the table and placed her hand over his. "We can move on to something better now," she said. "Believe that. I think this baby is a challenge from God, Mohinder. I know you will meet it."