Comments | gamurai: I get emotional

gamurai

I get emotional

Jul 06, 2009 12:41

I am not sure where imagined slights and disdain end and real slights and disdain begin. I'm not sure if i've always been like this, but i have a hard time sorting through my interactions with people to seperate the real from the imagined. The more intimate the connection to a person the more small turns of phrase or actions will leave me ( Read more... )

Comments 15

heapha July 6 2009, 04:44:32 UTC

no one is up all the time.

There are two types of people in the world, ones who rely on themselves to be pepped up, that will retreat when down and are able to eb and flow their own emotions seperate to external influences and those who need the constant reinforcement from others, feeding of the mood around them and the emotions of those in proximity. I am in the second catagory.

I think you are the same, you are around stressed solicitors.... and thus you sense the stress and it mirrors in you, if you are around happy people you feel up having that emotion mirrored. Probelm with our kind is that it can be very draining to be out of control all the time, handing the control of your emotions to those around you and you just have to be careful who you let guide your rollercoaster. Take a break out, meet up with someone light and fun and soon you may feel a weight lift off your shoulders.

gamurai July 6 2009, 11:30:26 UTC

I thought you've been chilling out on extended lunch breaks?
Who is still consistantly light and fun at our age?

heapha July 6 2009, 12:41:49 UTC

my life is just one extended lunch break - no I have been retreating into fantasy land... I may one day get to the point where I write some of the daydream senarios into stories but for now I can stare into nothingness and be anywhere I want.

ange_tarantism July 6 2009, 04:53:47 UTC

Welcome to the world of working. I wish I could tell you that it gets better.

Best I can tell you is the game was awesome last week and I had a heap of fun. It had riddles and good amount of combat and funky imaginative ideas that kept us guessing.

metaphor123 July 6 2009, 05:30:45 UTC

I concur. I love creepy. Not 'that guy on the bus looked like a total pedo' creepy, but fantasy creepy. Good game.

heapha July 6 2009, 05:47:53 UTC

hey aren't YOU that guy on the bus?

(jokes)

gamurai July 6 2009, 11:17:10 UTC

Thanks. It means a surprising lot at the moment to hear that at least i can write an ok roleplaying game :p See you tomorrow

sad_frog July 6 2009, 07:08:28 UTC

It's interesting how people seem so confident. You just see people act, and you don't see the doubts and insecurities they go through to get to that action. I tend to assume everyone else knows what they're doing. This is an aspect of you I wouldn't have picked.

I don't have any advice though. I just hope it gets easier for you, as you learn your way around this particular workplace and have more positive interactions and fewer shit ones. I know I feel much better in my job these days, even though it was a minefield of fear and uncertainty to start with.

gamurai July 6 2009, 11:24:39 UTC

"This is an aspect of you I wouldn't have picked" Because of my rugged outdoorsy emotionless exterior?
By the way have you had a chance to watch the 7th seal?

sad_frog July 6 2009, 11:29:06 UTC

Something like that.

I was just thinking about it today. I haven't watched it yet, because I've classified it as something I need to pay attention to, and mostly I've been watching things while I sew. It's high on my to-do list.

sim_puyo July 6 2009, 08:32:17 UTC

It reminds me of the interns on scrubs that cry in the cupboards. Everybody does it. Lucy did it. Lucy's interns do it.

So many jobs are ridiculously hard. You're in good company.

I think Tanith is right. A lot of seemingly confident people go through the same kind of self doubt - you just don't see those bits.

You're learning a lot. I have a lot of respect and sympathy for anyone who's in a position where they are stretching themselves and learning a lot. I think it's very healthy for your brain capacity.

Plan to have a holiday?

gamurai July 6 2009, 11:22:57 UTC

I think being able to crawl into an enclosed space to cry is a throw back to the time when my parents arms were a safety net for any of lifes hardships.

No plans for a holiday as yet. My unusual uni session times mean that it is often hard to arrange to go away when normal uni breaks. But will see. Maybe even another 3 day trip somewhere like the hunter valley

sim_james July 6 2009, 13:20:08 UTC

If you can name the things that you want to excel at during your day, and at the end of the day say whether or not you have met your expectations about those things, then your self worth will not rely so much on the expectations and beliefs of others.

Ultimately, you're the person you have to answer to. There's no need to trust the opinions others have of you over your own self-knowledge. You can do it!

Your emotions are there for a reason. They help you to understand what's going on in your head. Signs that you do not like people being inconsistent with you, or that you recognise V as a person who supports you and makes you stronger. Emotions, even negative ones, are not chains that trap you; they're instruments of your growth and change.

I hope this week is ncrementally better than last week was!