Third Sting [Video]
[When the feed clicks on, one animated, highly irritated ninja becomes audible.]
-ESTS? FOR DAMN VESTS? I GOT MY ASS KICKED FOR VESTS?
[There's something small and equally animated flapping its long noodly arms at him. Its head is smooth as an eggshell and so is the rest of it. It is wearing what looks like several layers of vests of various exotic origins.]
BUT my dear boy, you look--just fine! And why wouldn't you? Now the world can seeeee, myyyyy, veeest-- [He seems to be trying to go into this song.]
OI! SHUDDAP! ... Geez, that's like... the third time...
We've been over this repeatedly. If you don't believe us, we'll prove it.
[Naruto grumbles a bit when Soifon mentions 'proving it' and then shoots a glare towards Suigetsu.]
...Can't believe you recorded ALL OF IT, y'know...
[There's a distinct snicker from off-camera and then a Cheshire grin leans into the frame.] If I didn't work so hard, we wouldn't have proof, right?
[The spindly man clicks his touge doubtfully.] Proof of WHAT? The boy falling and skinning his KNEEEE?
Better get your glasses, gramps. [There's a chuckle and a click cuts off whatever the alien might have been about to say -- tape's a-rollin'.]
-----------
[Naruto let out a quiet whine. All is well until the small, distinctly poisonous creature deciedes to snap and bites Naruto on the hand.] ... CRIKEY! IT BIT ME!
I told you to leave it alone.
-----------
[The Guide's view switches to show Naruto in his Croc Hunter gear bent over a hooped rope on the ground. He looks around subtly before covering the trap with some leaves. As he stands and dusts himself, he looks around as if confused for a second.] ...Ehh, where did...? [After a second of deciding, he smiles and steps over. Suddenly, the forest ground erupts upwards as the trap is sprung and Naruto is pulled into the canopy. His hat falls to the ground as he's dragged out of sight.] DAMMIT! OI! SOIFON-TAICHOUUU!
[Lazy sound of clapping from off-screen.] Well, at least you caught something.
-----------
[The view switches again. This time the Guide is shaking and looking up a hill. Rocks of various sizes are tumbling from all sides, and a familiar, blond-headed ninja is rushing down the hill as fast as he can, one hand lifted and clutching the hat on his head.] OI! RUNNNN! I THINK... I THINK I BROKE THE MOUNTAIN AHHHHH!
Uzumaki, what did you do this time?!
[He runs past the Guide's position followed by all those rocks before there's some shouts from off screen before everything finally seems to settle.]
-----------
[The Guide's view switches yet again. This time the group seems to be in thick underbrush. There are some bushes shaking violently up ahead and some strange noises. Naruto creeps into view and looks at the camera.] Think that's the Largefoot? Only one way to find out, y'know! [And he grins before darting ahead and diving into the bushes. Everything goes deathly quiet until Naruto emerges, ghostly pale as he rushes away.] W-WE SHOULD... GIVE 'EM SOME PRIVACY! [And as he runs, he's followed by 3-4 hideous looking aliens who don't seem to pleased about having their night out interrupted.]
[There's a lengthy blank silence before one of the onlookers offscreen bursts out laughing.] Bets on his chances of surviving this one?
-----------
[When the Guide's view changes, the group seems to be near a freshwater river. Naruto is on his knees at the riverbank, hunched over and splashing some water on his face. Some driftwood drifts over towards him, and he looks up at it, except it's not driftwood.] ... Sorta looks like one of those animals the guy on the videos was always wrestlin' with... [He leans closer, squinting when all of a sudden the jaws of the GIANT ALIEN CROC thing fly open and snap down, trying to take Naruto's head off. All the creature gets, thanks to ninja reflexes, is Naruto's prized hat. He blinks as the animal dips underwater.] Hey... HEY! WAITAMINUTE! COME BACK HERE! [And then dives in to recover his hat. The water is churned up in some furious splashing and cursing by a familiar, raspy voice.]
[There's an impatient sigh.] He's caused us to lose enough time. We're moving on.
-----------
[Finally, the Guide clicks over one more time. The setting is a clifftop. All seems fine until the Guide shakily jerks over to show the creature itself. The Juswaldian Largefoot. It's arms seem to be held over its head, and the Guide pans up to show a flailing Naruto held in the creature's grip.] LEMME GO, DAMMIT! HEY! HEEEEY! [And the creature turns towards the cliff, gives a terrifying roar, and then flings Naruto off the cliff.] Aaaa... ahhhh... AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
And that, ladies and gentlemen -- definitely karma. [A small click of metal as the Guide's set down, and then Suigetsu steps into view, swinging his sword, eyes on the Largefoot.] I call first strike!
I went after him last time. It's your turn. Besides... [There's a flicker of movement, and suddenly the Largefoot is flying towards the Guide. Soifon's standing where it used to be, foot outstretched.] You're too slow.
[There's a boom and a crackle. The Guide quickly shifts over to show Naruto standing at the edge of the cliff. His clothing is be smoking a bit and his hat is gone. He points towards the creature and growls.] Oi! The hell was THAT for!
-----------
[The clips fades to black as the battle begins. Once again, the three hunters and their employer are on the Guide's screen.]
[Suigetsu's smirking and shaking his guide casually in the egghead's face.] You got all that, gramps? We could even make a copy.
[The employer is still, save for his noodly arms waving idly in random directions. Suddenly, he springs forward, eye to eye with Naruto.] But the BOY didn't actually get hurt, now did he? HARassed, perhaps, but wounded he was NOT. And now, I'll have an oooouuuuutfiiit that looooooks--
We know.
[Naruto reaches out and grabs the man by the collar and shakes him vigorously.] THE HELL? I WAS INJURED! DIDN'T YOU JUST WATCHHHH?!? WE GOT YOU THE STUPID PELT!
[The employer gasps, tearing himself away from Naruto's grasp. He dances back a few steps, arms flailing, before jabbing a finger at Naruto.] How, DARE you. The pelt is not 'STUUUpid', it is rare! Collectible! Stylish! Now that IT IS mine, the GALAXY can... ♫See my vest, see my vest, made from real Largefoot chest♫--
[A chorus of "SHADDUP!" "Can it, Gramps!" and "Shut up," sound before the Guide's feed mercifully shuts off with the bonus negotiations still (futily) underway.]
((OOC: Naruto, Soifon, Suigetsu, and egghead employer. Please note that this is backdated to the day before Naruto's party!))
-ESTS? FOR DAMN VESTS? I GOT MY ASS KICKED FOR VESTS?
[There's something small and equally animated flapping its long noodly arms at him. Its head is smooth as an eggshell and so is the rest of it. It is wearing what looks like several layers of vests of various exotic origins.]
BUT my dear boy, you look--just fine! And why wouldn't you? Now the world can seeeee, myyyyy, veeest-- [He seems to be trying to go into this song.]
OI! SHUDDAP! ... Geez, that's like... the third time...
We've been over this repeatedly. If you don't believe us, we'll prove it.
[Naruto grumbles a bit when Soifon mentions 'proving it' and then shoots a glare towards Suigetsu.]
...Can't believe you recorded ALL OF IT, y'know...
[There's a distinct snicker from off-camera and then a Cheshire grin leans into the frame.] If I didn't work so hard, we wouldn't have proof, right?
[The spindly man clicks his touge doubtfully.] Proof of WHAT? The boy falling and skinning his KNEEEE?
Better get your glasses, gramps. [There's a chuckle and a click cuts off whatever the alien might have been about to say -- tape's a-rollin'.]
-----------
[Naruto let out a quiet whine. All is well until the small, distinctly poisonous creature deciedes to snap and bites Naruto on the hand.] ... CRIKEY! IT BIT ME!
I told you to leave it alone.
-----------
[The Guide's view switches to show Naruto in his Croc Hunter gear bent over a hooped rope on the ground. He looks around subtly before covering the trap with some leaves. As he stands and dusts himself, he looks around as if confused for a second.] ...Ehh, where did...? [After a second of deciding, he smiles and steps over. Suddenly, the forest ground erupts upwards as the trap is sprung and Naruto is pulled into the canopy. His hat falls to the ground as he's dragged out of sight.] DAMMIT! OI! SOIFON-TAICHOUUU!
[Lazy sound of clapping from off-screen.] Well, at least you caught something.
-----------
[The view switches again. This time the Guide is shaking and looking up a hill. Rocks of various sizes are tumbling from all sides, and a familiar, blond-headed ninja is rushing down the hill as fast as he can, one hand lifted and clutching the hat on his head.] OI! RUNNNN! I THINK... I THINK I BROKE THE MOUNTAIN AHHHHH!
Uzumaki, what did you do this time?!
[He runs past the Guide's position followed by all those rocks before there's some shouts from off screen before everything finally seems to settle.]
-----------
[The Guide's view switches yet again. This time the group seems to be in thick underbrush. There are some bushes shaking violently up ahead and some strange noises. Naruto creeps into view and looks at the camera.] Think that's the Largefoot? Only one way to find out, y'know! [And he grins before darting ahead and diving into the bushes. Everything goes deathly quiet until Naruto emerges, ghostly pale as he rushes away.] W-WE SHOULD... GIVE 'EM SOME PRIVACY! [And as he runs, he's followed by 3-4 hideous looking aliens who don't seem to pleased about having their night out interrupted.]
[There's a lengthy blank silence before one of the onlookers offscreen bursts out laughing.] Bets on his chances of surviving this one?
-----------
[When the Guide's view changes, the group seems to be near a freshwater river. Naruto is on his knees at the riverbank, hunched over and splashing some water on his face. Some driftwood drifts over towards him, and he looks up at it, except it's not driftwood.] ... Sorta looks like one of those animals the guy on the videos was always wrestlin' with... [He leans closer, squinting when all of a sudden the jaws of the GIANT ALIEN CROC thing fly open and snap down, trying to take Naruto's head off. All the creature gets, thanks to ninja reflexes, is Naruto's prized hat. He blinks as the animal dips underwater.] Hey... HEY! WAITAMINUTE! COME BACK HERE! [And then dives in to recover his hat. The water is churned up in some furious splashing and cursing by a familiar, raspy voice.]
[There's an impatient sigh.] He's caused us to lose enough time. We're moving on.
-----------
[Finally, the Guide clicks over one more time. The setting is a clifftop. All seems fine until the Guide shakily jerks over to show the creature itself. The Juswaldian Largefoot. It's arms seem to be held over its head, and the Guide pans up to show a flailing Naruto held in the creature's grip.] LEMME GO, DAMMIT! HEY! HEEEEY! [And the creature turns towards the cliff, gives a terrifying roar, and then flings Naruto off the cliff.] Aaaa... ahhhh... AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
And that, ladies and gentlemen -- definitely karma. [A small click of metal as the Guide's set down, and then Suigetsu steps into view, swinging his sword, eyes on the Largefoot.] I call first strike!
I went after him last time. It's your turn. Besides... [There's a flicker of movement, and suddenly the Largefoot is flying towards the Guide. Soifon's standing where it used to be, foot outstretched.] You're too slow.
[There's a boom and a crackle. The Guide quickly shifts over to show Naruto standing at the edge of the cliff. His clothing is be smoking a bit and his hat is gone. He points towards the creature and growls.] Oi! The hell was THAT for!
-----------
[The clips fades to black as the battle begins. Once again, the three hunters and their employer are on the Guide's screen.]
[Suigetsu's smirking and shaking his guide casually in the egghead's face.] You got all that, gramps? We could even make a copy.
[The employer is still, save for his noodly arms waving idly in random directions. Suddenly, he springs forward, eye to eye with Naruto.] But the BOY didn't actually get hurt, now did he? HARassed, perhaps, but wounded he was NOT. And now, I'll have an oooouuuuutfiiit that looooooks--
We know.
[Naruto reaches out and grabs the man by the collar and shakes him vigorously.] THE HELL? I WAS INJURED! DIDN'T YOU JUST WATCHHHH?!? WE GOT YOU THE STUPID PELT!
[The employer gasps, tearing himself away from Naruto's grasp. He dances back a few steps, arms flailing, before jabbing a finger at Naruto.] How, DARE you. The pelt is not 'STUUUpid', it is rare! Collectible! Stylish! Now that IT IS mine, the GALAXY can... ♫See my vest, see my vest, made from real Largefoot chest♫--
[A chorus of "SHADDUP!" "Can it, Gramps!" and "Shut up," sound before the Guide's feed mercifully shuts off with the bonus negotiations still (futily) underway.]
((OOC: Naruto, Soifon, Suigetsu, and egghead employer. Please note that this is backdated to the day before Naruto's party!))