fic: elegance, in three parts.
Title: elegance, in three parts.
Rating: PG-13
Pairings/Characters: G-Dragon/Seung Ri/TOP
Notes: MY FIRST FORAY INTO BIG BANG FANDOM. :( Pairing is slightly off for a G-Ri comm, but let's face it, G-Ri is my real Big Bang OTP. :) Any and all TOP/Seung Ri moments written for xs0xelectrikkx and any and all GD/TOP moments written for perv.
Summary: It took a lot of waiting and wanting and refusing for this.
1. from the outside looking in
TOP eventually gets himself used to the fact that he’s not the only Seunghyun anymore, that now he’s TOP most of the time, actor and idol extraordinaire, and only Choi Seunghyun sometimes, when he’s with the rest of Big Bang and there’s another person with the exact same name living in extremely close capacity with him.
The best (and sometimes worst) part is that Lee Seunghyun is young and like most young people, has the energy to go with it. In a lot of ways, Seung Ri is absolutely adorable - he’s earnest and hard-working and has the youthful charm to back up all his ways. In short, TOP really likes Seung Ri (it’s almost impossible not to, after all), but he won’t deny that it causes some confusion because of their shared name.
Sometimes Jiyong or Youngbae or Daesung will call, “Seunghyun!” and TOP will turn around expectantly, only to see their group’s maknae cheerfully bouncing over, asking, “Yes, hyung?”
Jiyong takes an immediate liking to Seung Ri when they first meet, but then again, Jiyong is kind of childlike himself in so many ways. Seung Ri’s good for Jiyong though, TOP can’t deny him that. No one else quite understands Jiyong’s stupid pranks quite like Seung Ri, or even goes along with them delightedly (again, like Seung Ri).
However, the worst part is when TOP finds himself with somewhat less than orthodox feelings towards Seung Ri, all those bright smiles finally getting to the thump-thump of his heart, until he can really say that, yeah, he’s taking his beatboxing cues from his heart.
But he firmly tells himself over and over again that it’s wrong and it’s not what he was brought up to think and Seung Ri’s only a child - what he should be doing is dating lots of girls and getting into all kinds of unsavory trouble. So TOP learns to keep his mouth shut because he would rather quit and never step on a stage again than to have Seung Ri look at him, horrified, and never speak to him again. As the group’s oldest, he decides, at least this much is up to him.
And maybe it’s because he’s the oldest of the group, and he’s got some kind of duty to perform, but TOP finds himself watching over the group anxiously, feeling useless when he can’t do anything and particularly proud when he can.
What makes him feel the most useless (and the worst) is seeing their group’s maknae, with the sweetly devilish grin and the forever good intentions, develop a terrible, overwhelming, and completely obvious-to-everyone-but-the-actual-object-of-his-affections crush on Jiyong.
Damn, he thinks, when he sees the first telltale signs - when he sees the way Seung Ri’s eyes always flick up to Jiyong’s first for approval, when he sees the smile that always lights up when Jiyong’s nearby - and with that last thought, he realizes that the reason why Seung Ri’s symptoms seem so familiar is because Jiyong has that same exact effect on everyone; because they are similar, in the way that what they both want the most is for Jiyong to look back at them too.
And then, TOP really wants to bang his head on a nearby flat and preferably hard surface because damned if he’s going to let this happen to him, because if one band member wasn’t bad enough, now there’s two.
Jiyong’s harder though, because Jiyong’s a flirt, and TOP would almost rather that Jiyong and Seung Ri just go out or make out or do something, if for the sole reason that he wouldn’t have to see Seung Ri’s wince when Jiyong’s new favorite of the week doesn’t happen to be him, but rather TOP or Youngbae or Daesung or all three.
In a way, they’re all selfish and on that road to self-destruction, TOP realizes, because try as he might, there’s always something that Jiyong and Seung Ri have that he’ll never get - only Jiyong’s too indecisive and Seung Ri too serious and he himself too afraid.
When Jiyong stands too close, or slings a friendly (and sometimes more than friendly) arm around his waist, TOP tries not to think too much of it. When Jiyong’s got himself curled around Seung Ri, mouth so close that Seung Ri’s practically swallowing his words, TOP tries to squash that feeling of jealousy, repeating good for you over and over in his mind.
When Seung Ri comes to TOP for comfort, hands hesitant and shaking, kisses unpracticed and so sweet they make TOP’s teeth hurt, he doesn’t say anything.
It’s because, he maintains, because he refuses to let himself ruin this by wanting it, there isn’t anything to say - no comforting words to repeat, no promises to make.
2. such great heights
Seung Ri’s charm point, it’s decided, is his charm. Even if Seung Ri wasn’t young and cute and absolutely adorable, it’s his quirks and naturally charming self that completely disarms everyone. Luckily, Seung Ri is young and cute and absolutely adorable, and before long, the term ‘maknae’ isn’t even just used as a title anymore - it’s a name he’s built for himself.
But sometimes, even Seung Ri tires of being the cute and charming one, his own faults made all too clear on that one episode of KM Idol World, when TOP-hyung is chosen over him by the pretty Junsuh-noona. At times like that, it doesn’t even matter that he was chosen over Jiyong-hyung and Daesung-hyung, or that there are countless fans who probably would choose him over TOP-hyung - TOP-hyung is older and more mature and handsome in a way that Seung Ri will never be.
Despite having the same name, Seung Ri just can’t help but think that there would be no way the two of them could ever be mistaken, because TOP-hyung is always so composed and mature and maybe that’s why Jiyong-hyung likes him more. Or maybe it’s because Seung Ri doesn’t understand rapping and beatboxing and that kind of music like TOP-hyung does, or because Seung Ri had always just been thisclose to not even making Big Bang, or because if Seung Ri was Jiyong-hyung, he would probably like TOP-hyung better too.
When Jiyong kisses Seung Ri for the first time, all Seung Ri can think is oh God am I even doing this right, what if Jiyong-hyung doesn’t even like me, what if this is all wrong, what if what if oh God. But all his fears are cast away because it’s Jiyong who pulls away and looks apologetic, who twists his fingers with Seung Ri’s and whispers, sorry maknae, I’m sorry before Seung Ri can even form a coherent thought and tell him that it’s okay! It’s fine! He’s been waiting for this for a long, long time, and he’d just like it if it could happen again, preferably many many agains.
But Jiyong-hyung keeps repeating his apology and Seung Ri’s never been that good with words, especially around Jiyong-hyung, and, well, he assures himself that it doesn’t hurt a bit when Jiyong-hyung wrinkles his nose at TOP-hyung from across the table, a generation of inside jokes he’ll never quite get.
And the thing is that Seung Ri’s selfish. Seung Ri wants to know and he wants to be included and this has grown way out of proportion for Seung Ri.
He won’t deny that he’s always had a bit of an idol crush on TOP-hyung - because TOP-hyung’s a fairly good actor and a fairly good singer, even though he doesn’t like doing it, and attractive in the way that Seung Ri admires most and more or less a lot of the things Seung Ri has always wanted to be. The best (and maybe the worst as well) part of their relationship is that Seung Ri is always on edge, because what he wants is to be able to be on par with TOP-hyung.
In a fit of boldness or stupidity or stupidity-caused boldness, it’s Seung Ri who kisses Jiyong next - but wait for it, that’s not the stupid part - it’s Seung Ri who kisses Jiyong next, yeah, and it’s Jiyong who kisses him back, yeah, maybe he’s given up, but it’s also Seung Ri who’s got a hold on TOP’s hand, palms damp when he rests them on either side of TOP’s face to kiss him too, but it’s also Jiyong who doesn’t mind, who wants them both (and if it’s for Jiyong-hyung, Seung Ri doesn’t mind sharing, not one bit).
3. when the center holds
What Jiyong loves the most is being able to call “Seunghyun,” and having two heads turn around.
Rating: PG-13
Pairings/Characters: G-Dragon/Seung Ri/TOP
Notes: MY FIRST FORAY INTO BIG BANG FANDOM. :( Pairing is slightly off for a G-Ri comm, but let's face it, G-Ri is my real Big Bang OTP. :) Any and all TOP/Seung Ri moments written for xs0xelectrikkx and any and all GD/TOP moments written for perv.
Summary: It took a lot of waiting and wanting and refusing for this.
1. from the outside looking in
TOP eventually gets himself used to the fact that he’s not the only Seunghyun anymore, that now he’s TOP most of the time, actor and idol extraordinaire, and only Choi Seunghyun sometimes, when he’s with the rest of Big Bang and there’s another person with the exact same name living in extremely close capacity with him.
The best (and sometimes worst) part is that Lee Seunghyun is young and like most young people, has the energy to go with it. In a lot of ways, Seung Ri is absolutely adorable - he’s earnest and hard-working and has the youthful charm to back up all his ways. In short, TOP really likes Seung Ri (it’s almost impossible not to, after all), but he won’t deny that it causes some confusion because of their shared name.
Sometimes Jiyong or Youngbae or Daesung will call, “Seunghyun!” and TOP will turn around expectantly, only to see their group’s maknae cheerfully bouncing over, asking, “Yes, hyung?”
Jiyong takes an immediate liking to Seung Ri when they first meet, but then again, Jiyong is kind of childlike himself in so many ways. Seung Ri’s good for Jiyong though, TOP can’t deny him that. No one else quite understands Jiyong’s stupid pranks quite like Seung Ri, or even goes along with them delightedly (again, like Seung Ri).
However, the worst part is when TOP finds himself with somewhat less than orthodox feelings towards Seung Ri, all those bright smiles finally getting to the thump-thump of his heart, until he can really say that, yeah, he’s taking his beatboxing cues from his heart.
But he firmly tells himself over and over again that it’s wrong and it’s not what he was brought up to think and Seung Ri’s only a child - what he should be doing is dating lots of girls and getting into all kinds of unsavory trouble. So TOP learns to keep his mouth shut because he would rather quit and never step on a stage again than to have Seung Ri look at him, horrified, and never speak to him again. As the group’s oldest, he decides, at least this much is up to him.
And maybe it’s because he’s the oldest of the group, and he’s got some kind of duty to perform, but TOP finds himself watching over the group anxiously, feeling useless when he can’t do anything and particularly proud when he can.
What makes him feel the most useless (and the worst) is seeing their group’s maknae, with the sweetly devilish grin and the forever good intentions, develop a terrible, overwhelming, and completely obvious-to-everyone-but-the-actual-object-of-his-affections crush on Jiyong.
Damn, he thinks, when he sees the first telltale signs - when he sees the way Seung Ri’s eyes always flick up to Jiyong’s first for approval, when he sees the smile that always lights up when Jiyong’s nearby - and with that last thought, he realizes that the reason why Seung Ri’s symptoms seem so familiar is because Jiyong has that same exact effect on everyone; because they are similar, in the way that what they both want the most is for Jiyong to look back at them too.
And then, TOP really wants to bang his head on a nearby flat and preferably hard surface because damned if he’s going to let this happen to him, because if one band member wasn’t bad enough, now there’s two.
Jiyong’s harder though, because Jiyong’s a flirt, and TOP would almost rather that Jiyong and Seung Ri just go out or make out or do something, if for the sole reason that he wouldn’t have to see Seung Ri’s wince when Jiyong’s new favorite of the week doesn’t happen to be him, but rather TOP or Youngbae or Daesung or all three.
In a way, they’re all selfish and on that road to self-destruction, TOP realizes, because try as he might, there’s always something that Jiyong and Seung Ri have that he’ll never get - only Jiyong’s too indecisive and Seung Ri too serious and he himself too afraid.
When Jiyong stands too close, or slings a friendly (and sometimes more than friendly) arm around his waist, TOP tries not to think too much of it. When Jiyong’s got himself curled around Seung Ri, mouth so close that Seung Ri’s practically swallowing his words, TOP tries to squash that feeling of jealousy, repeating good for you over and over in his mind.
When Seung Ri comes to TOP for comfort, hands hesitant and shaking, kisses unpracticed and so sweet they make TOP’s teeth hurt, he doesn’t say anything.
It’s because, he maintains, because he refuses to let himself ruin this by wanting it, there isn’t anything to say - no comforting words to repeat, no promises to make.
2. such great heights
Seung Ri’s charm point, it’s decided, is his charm. Even if Seung Ri wasn’t young and cute and absolutely adorable, it’s his quirks and naturally charming self that completely disarms everyone. Luckily, Seung Ri is young and cute and absolutely adorable, and before long, the term ‘maknae’ isn’t even just used as a title anymore - it’s a name he’s built for himself.
But sometimes, even Seung Ri tires of being the cute and charming one, his own faults made all too clear on that one episode of KM Idol World, when TOP-hyung is chosen over him by the pretty Junsuh-noona. At times like that, it doesn’t even matter that he was chosen over Jiyong-hyung and Daesung-hyung, or that there are countless fans who probably would choose him over TOP-hyung - TOP-hyung is older and more mature and handsome in a way that Seung Ri will never be.
Despite having the same name, Seung Ri just can’t help but think that there would be no way the two of them could ever be mistaken, because TOP-hyung is always so composed and mature and maybe that’s why Jiyong-hyung likes him more. Or maybe it’s because Seung Ri doesn’t understand rapping and beatboxing and that kind of music like TOP-hyung does, or because Seung Ri had always just been thisclose to not even making Big Bang, or because if Seung Ri was Jiyong-hyung, he would probably like TOP-hyung better too.
When Jiyong kisses Seung Ri for the first time, all Seung Ri can think is oh God am I even doing this right, what if Jiyong-hyung doesn’t even like me, what if this is all wrong, what if what if oh God. But all his fears are cast away because it’s Jiyong who pulls away and looks apologetic, who twists his fingers with Seung Ri’s and whispers, sorry maknae, I’m sorry before Seung Ri can even form a coherent thought and tell him that it’s okay! It’s fine! He’s been waiting for this for a long, long time, and he’d just like it if it could happen again, preferably many many agains.
But Jiyong-hyung keeps repeating his apology and Seung Ri’s never been that good with words, especially around Jiyong-hyung, and, well, he assures himself that it doesn’t hurt a bit when Jiyong-hyung wrinkles his nose at TOP-hyung from across the table, a generation of inside jokes he’ll never quite get.
And the thing is that Seung Ri’s selfish. Seung Ri wants to know and he wants to be included and this has grown way out of proportion for Seung Ri.
He won’t deny that he’s always had a bit of an idol crush on TOP-hyung - because TOP-hyung’s a fairly good actor and a fairly good singer, even though he doesn’t like doing it, and attractive in the way that Seung Ri admires most and more or less a lot of the things Seung Ri has always wanted to be. The best (and maybe the worst as well) part of their relationship is that Seung Ri is always on edge, because what he wants is to be able to be on par with TOP-hyung.
In a fit of boldness or stupidity or stupidity-caused boldness, it’s Seung Ri who kisses Jiyong next - but wait for it, that’s not the stupid part - it’s Seung Ri who kisses Jiyong next, yeah, and it’s Jiyong who kisses him back, yeah, maybe he’s given up, but it’s also Seung Ri who’s got a hold on TOP’s hand, palms damp when he rests them on either side of TOP’s face to kiss him too, but it’s also Jiyong who doesn’t mind, who wants them both (and if it’s for Jiyong-hyung, Seung Ri doesn’t mind sharing, not one bit).
3. when the center holds
What Jiyong loves the most is being able to call “Seunghyun,” and having two heads turn around.