and I'm glad you don't feel bad about what Mrs. Shreffler said because she says shit like that all the time to everybody, she's someone who you can never take seriously. XD
and what are you on? Welbutrin isn't doing shit for me XD
if anything I should feel like shit that you're happy because I did nothing but drag you down from that rightful throne of over-the-top joy that you're sitting on now XD
Elora, I can't even bear to think about you anymore. You really have hurt me far beyond what anyone else could have done. I don't even want to be your friend, because just thinking about the shit that I was put through just for the hope that it wasn't all a lie makes me sick.
But right now, with the way you've been acting for the past few days, you don't care, do you? Your life is just "far too perfect" for anything, especially the feelings of others, to affect you in any way.
I wish I had never talked to you in the first place. I wish I could go back in time and punch myself before I ever did it.
Now all I can do is pray and pray that my utter hatred dies down eventually so I can start living totally free again. Like I used to.
I'm running away from negetivity because after the past two years I can't swallow any more of it. Is there any justice in what I'm doing? No. Do I care that I hurt you? Yes. I care a lot.
But if I stay just as I was, letting things get me down, letting things affect me, I'll end up completely wasting away.
Selfish? Yes.
What's going on inside my mind, heart, and body...is something that NO ONE knows. Not one single person can even imagine the complete and utter turmoil that has been constricting my soul for six hundred days. Think about it. A magnetic pull on all sides by a slew of different forces. Two of those forces are as strong as the world's will to exist. The others are weak, but they're still there. Completely ripping me apart.
It's like To Kill a Mockingbird. A complete loss of innocence. When this started, I was a child. Now I'm completely soiled, and I'm not even an adult. I'm still a child. An immature, mangled child
( ... )
I will be honest with you in saying that I could not do much better than you. You were pretty awesome for the most part <3
Just saying, Im tired and its really early and my apostrophe key isnt working and I was thinking about it only because VH1 plays only romantic songs at this hour of the morning XD
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and I'm glad you don't feel bad about what Mrs. Shreffler said because she says shit like that all the time to everybody, she's someone who you can never take seriously. XD
and what are you on? Welbutrin isn't doing shit for me XD
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I'm not being bitter, either. Not this very second, anyway. E>
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I don't think I even knew what it was to be happy until you first spoke to me, my dear. *hearts hearts less than three, fuck you LJ!*
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Elora, I can't even bear to think about you anymore. You really have hurt me far beyond what anyone else could have done. I don't even want to be your friend, because just thinking about the shit that I was put through just for the hope that it wasn't all a lie makes me sick.
But right now, with the way you've been acting for the past few days, you don't care, do you? Your life is just "far too perfect" for anything, especially the feelings of others, to affect you in any way.
I wish I had never talked to you in the first place. I wish I could go back in time and punch myself before I ever did it.
Now all I can do is pray and pray that my utter hatred dies down eventually so I can start living totally free again. Like I used to.
Reply
But if I stay just as I was, letting things get me down, letting things affect me, I'll end up completely wasting away.
Selfish? Yes.
What's going on inside my mind, heart, and body...is something that NO ONE knows. Not one single person can even imagine the complete and utter turmoil that has been constricting my soul for six hundred days. Think about it. A magnetic pull on all sides by a slew of different forces. Two of those forces are as strong as the world's will to exist. The others are weak, but they're still there. Completely ripping me apart.
It's like To Kill a Mockingbird. A complete loss of innocence. When this started, I was a child. Now I'm completely soiled, and I'm not even an adult. I'm still a child. An immature, mangled child ( ... )
Reply
Just saying, Im tired and its really early and my apostrophe key isnt working and I was thinking about it only because VH1 plays only romantic songs at this hour of the morning XD
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