I know how that can be... not the exact situation.
My dad is slowly going deaf due to him working in a factory and not using ear plugs long long ago. I constantly have to stop myself from getting annoyed when I have to repeat myself 20 times because he can't hear what I'm saying and when I do lose my temper I feel like such a tool because I know it's not his fault.
Yeah... Isn't it strange how something can be at once really amusing and heartbreaking at the same time?
When my grandmother was going downhill fast, her kids would make jokes about her not remembering anything, and at least she doesn't remember that her brother died in WWII (hell, probably doesn't even remember WWII or Vietnam or Korea or anything...) or pretty much anything unpleasant that has happened in her life.
Then they'd get very quiet and change the subject.
The only explanation I can think of: Humans are weird.
I'm sorry you and your dad have to go through this. No matter the incarnation, it sucks.
When my dad has the seizure that marked the beginning of his last week, it severely affected his capacity to talk. (And he used to love to talk.) He knew he had little time left and he couldn't say anything that he wanted to, to give us all that closure. The only thing he could do was look at us and nod in agreement or shake his head, or laugh when something was funny. So we each had to have our private time with him and say for him what we knew he wanted to say, and he would nod, and he cried the whole time, and you could see the pain in his eyes of not being able to get out even a final "I love you".
I'm so sorry your dad has to go through Parkinson's. And it's natural for you to feel so frustrated over it. I'm not going to get all clichéd on you, though. Just... *hugs*
As weird as it sounds, I know exactly how your dad feels. If you've ever done any serious hallucinogen, you understand wanting, needing to be able to express yourself but not making your mouth say the words you mean...it is super frustrating, and it takes the patience of a saint to be there for the person having difficulty talking.
Maybe you feel guilty about thinking it's a lot of work to understand and deal with your dad...don't forget to give yourself credit for the fact that you do.
Comments 4
My dad is slowly going deaf due to him working in a factory and not using ear plugs long long ago. I constantly have to stop myself from getting annoyed when I have to repeat myself 20 times because he can't hear what I'm saying and when I do lose my temper I feel like such a tool because I know it's not his fault.
Reply
When my grandmother was going downhill fast, her kids would make jokes about her not remembering anything, and at least she doesn't remember that her brother died in WWII (hell, probably doesn't even remember WWII or Vietnam or Korea or anything...) or pretty much anything unpleasant that has happened in her life.
Then they'd get very quiet and change the subject.
The only explanation I can think of: Humans are weird.
I'm sorry you and your dad have to go through this. No matter the incarnation, it sucks.
Reply
When my dad has the seizure that marked the beginning of his last week, it severely affected his capacity to talk. (And he used to love to talk.) He knew he had little time left and he couldn't say anything that he wanted to, to give us all that closure. The only thing he could do was look at us and nod in agreement or shake his head, or laugh when something was funny. So we each had to have our private time with him and say for him what we knew he wanted to say, and he would nod, and he cried the whole time, and you could see the pain in his eyes of not being able to get out even a final "I love you".
I'm so sorry your dad has to go through Parkinson's. And it's natural for you to feel so frustrated over it. I'm not going to get all clichéd on you, though. Just... *hugs*
Reply
Maybe you feel guilty about thinking it's a lot of work to understand and deal with your dad...don't forget to give yourself credit for the fact that you do.
Reply
Leave a comment