Fall Until You Hit Bottom, PG, Dean & Sam

[geminigrl11]

This has been kicking around in my folder for a month or so, undergoing endless tweaking. (Poor words. I never let them catch a break).

It's been beta'd by my ever faithful trio, Faye, kaly, and Tyranusfan, but as usual, I played with it quite a bit after they sent it back. (Isn't that sad, that I need three for not even 2000 words? Thanks, guys,

Comments

[estei]

Oh, Gem.... I was so excited to see your name pop up on my flist! This just broke me. It's so visceral and gritty and painful.

Sam’s limp in his arms; not like he’s hurt, but like he’s empty. Like every part of him has given out, given in, and that’s worse. So much worse.

“Sam.”

There’s no answer, and Sam doesn’t even flinch, just lays there like a toy with the stuffing pulled out. This is so perfect, I don't even have words to describe it. The imagery and the sadness are so vivid and poignant. The desperation, on both of their parts, is so clear. You make Sam shine so much through Dean's point of view.

I love this, even though it broke my heart :)

[geminigrl11]

Sorry I broke you *offers glue and packing tape*

I'm so glad you liked it! And this: "You make Sam shine so much through Dean's point of view." is about the best compliment EVER.

*hugs* Happy New Year, hon!

[ash48]

Well, this just broke my heart into tiny little pieces. Beautifully written. I could feel Sam's pure despair. And Dean's. It makes it so much worse that Dean's not only dying but going to hell.

Thanks for sharing - even though it's left an ache in my heart.

[geminigrl11]

The Hell part makes it unbearable. To lose each Dean at all would be the worst kind of pain for Sam, but knowing he's suffering eternally so that Sam could live...would be wretched.

Sorry for the ache. But glad you enjoyed. :)

[ewanspotter]

Oh, boys. *clings to the fictional characters*

Lovely and bittersweet. Nice job.

[geminigrl11]

*clings, too* Despite the words above, I am also clinging to the desperate belief that Kripke gets them OUT of this.

Thanks so much!

[iamstealthyone]

Poor, broken Sam. It really would be horrible for him to lose Dean. *hugs him*

Nicely done.

Favorite lines:

for a year, Sam’s been trying to stop a slow-motion train wreck with only his two bare hands

Awesome description.

just lays there like a toy with the stuffing pulled out

Good analogy.

Sam, who’s shaking like he’ll never be warm.

Oh, Sam.

“Don’t ask me to be okay with this. It’ll never be okay.”

*hugs him*

[geminigrl11]

*hugs him, too* The brother pain is just wrecking me this season. I wouldn't even be able to function, if I were them. We need happy closure!

Thank you for commenting.

[phantomas]

Beautifully written.
thank you :)

[geminigrl11]

Thank you, too. :)