My gawd you are definitely running around in circles. My problem is I worry constantly if I’m going to be late. I try not to think to far into the future. That’s bc for me things always seem to change from day to day. You are to hard on yourself, I could say relax and take some time for yourself. But I know that is easier said then done. 🤗
My habitual way of life is very *in the moment*... I don't want to live in the future OR the past, my preferred time is **now**, really. I have old posts about how I don't like planning because it feels like a waste of energy when everything changes mid-stream... that trying to predict how "things will go" just seems like a fool's errand.
Yet, here I am... planning ahead as my job. And it turns out I'm pretty good at it.
But I also am figuring out that maybe.... I don't like this feeling of being on a treadmill where I very rarely get to enjoy today because I am too busy planning things way down the road.
Ooooooooo yes indeed. Welcome to my entire state of being :/
I have such a hard time with this. Though, for you it's how you get paid! And I think it's good to be good at this planning/thinking ahead. Even if your plan gets ruined, usually the pieces of the plan make good rafts for getting through Whatever Actually Happens.
But then, it's no good to miss out on the present because of this skill either!
I also have caught myself accidentally tsk-tsking people who are in a bit of a crisis moment and trapped in getting through now and I'm all high-and-mighty thinking they should be planning ahead and feeling like that's "natural" just because I do it all the time now for work and have gotten better and better and getting further and further ahead and getting those plans to work out (even if I have to turn them into rafts! Which definitely happne!) even though I know how HARD it is to change your time-mindset from being a past-thinker, present-thinker or future-thinker to one of the other timestamps. Like... when you're TRYING... it can feel impossible because whatever time-frame you're living in/thinking about most, is always OVERWHELMING. Period
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Same! My sister is not a planner-aheader....she was late to her own wedding! Because she's one of those that flies by the seat of her pants, and then I guess sort of reacts as things happen. Which is the kind of person she is...as you describe, it would be monumental/overwhelming for her to change her time-mindset. And likewise, building a Plan A and B and C and B-2 and B-3 and so on comes as naturally as breathing for me, and for me to NOT do that and just....LET stuff happen to me, and then react...is horrifying!
Helplessness DOES live in the present, that is why I hate it so very much! Anxiety is better lol
As someone late to their own wedding themselves.... (but my partner and I were late together... does that count for something?) I must admit am generally firmly set in the present and it causes me HUGE anxiety to worry about punctuality. Like... TREMENDOUS amounts of anxiety during the weeks, days, and hours to the event... even something as simple as a doctor's appointment. Two days ago I had an appointment I made 3 months ago for a 20 minute appointment. I probably spent 20 hours in 30 second snippets over the last 3 months WORRYING about/REMINDING myself to be on time for that appointment. (note: I was 3 minutes early by their clock! 5 minutes by mine
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That GIF is GREAT!!!
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Yet, here I am... planning ahead as my job.
And it turns out I'm pretty good at it.
But I also am figuring out that maybe.... I don't like this feeling of being on a treadmill where I very rarely get to enjoy today because I am too busy planning things way down the road.
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I have such a hard time with this. Though, for you it's how you get paid! And I think it's good to be good at this planning/thinking ahead. Even if your plan gets ruined, usually the pieces of the plan make good rafts for getting through Whatever Actually Happens.
But then, it's no good to miss out on the present because of this skill either!
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Helplessness DOES live in the present, that is why I hate it so very much! Anxiety is better lol
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I do that all the time.
LOL you act like this is a single isolated incident? sis plz
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