Okay, so I totally didn't just try to brush my teeth with handsoap just now. Totally didn't. But wouldn't that be funny if I did? Haha, oh yes. o-o ( Read more... )

I couldn't give a flying fart in space about "Brokeback Mountain."

*cough*... that is all.

Morningwood said of themselves "[we're] like a Monster Truck having sex with a Bond Girl." Best. Discription. Ever.

Damn it all. I need a job. I need to finish this design thing I'm working on. I need a cookie. Blah.

Is it wrong that I feel wholy weird realizing that people born in 1987 are 19 now? *feels Old, but not really*

I'd sprout wings ( Read more... )

My inner goth just wet its self... http://www.vampfangs.com/

This made my night...
"You can call me Aaron Burr from the way I'm droppin' Hamiltons."

Good lord. (Hamilton's on the $10 bill.)

Okay, man, I need to listen to Cake more often. How sad is it that I didn't know they covered "I Will Survive"? Damn.

Well, it's happened... I've applied to so many places that I have no idea where I applied. Crap. Should have made a list of names and dates, yes I should have. Did I? Oh no, that would have been sensible.

And none of them have the decency to call me and go "Ooh, Interview?" Blah.

Bitch, bitch, whine, whine.

"W'don't you throw those keys first?"
"I can't hear y'all.."
"Why don't you throw those keys first?"
"I can't hear y'all.."
*fast walking* "Why don't you throw those keys first?"
"Why don't you give me $250? I'm from San Francisco, baby, I don't know how y'all work 'round here."

That, ladies and germs, just passed under my window mere seconds ago. ( Read more... )

(So, okay, I wasn't tagged by anyone... I'm just starting my own game. Nyaah.) [Masterfully stolen from one qcjephGround Rules: The first player of this "game" starts with the topic "5 Guilty Pleasures" and people who get tagged need to write an LJ entry about their 5 Guilty Pleasures as well as state this rule. In the end, you need to choose the next 5 ( Read more... )

Ahh, you have to find amusement where you can, kiddos. You really do. Today's penis enlargement offer comes from one, "Capriciousness V. Jaundice." Now that's a name you can really turn your dick yellow to...