[douchevina]
MAGICAL GIRL RACKET DON
by gottis_chan
Momoko isn’t sure why she believes the talking, bouncing tennis ball on her bed. Maybe it’s because it is talking. And bouncing. On her bed. It makes no sense, but neither does the fact that she has followed the balls orders and has just now been saying a few random words:
“The Dinosaurs Fear Me!”
As she says that, strange things happens: Her pink dress disappears and instead she is now standing in a white shirt with blue details, a short tennis skirt, tennis shoes and socks, and some ribbons and trinkets here and there, among everything a set of pink sweat bands. She has a broche in the shape of a peach on her chest and tennis ball ear rings in her ears.
“What’s going on?!”
“You’re the magical girl Racket Don now, Momo-chan,” the ball pipes up. “And as I said, time is of the essence! An evil mad man is out trying to destroy the town, and he’ll stop at nothing before he achieves his true goal!”
Momoko considers this thoughtfully.
“I’m hungry.”
It almost looks like the ball face faults.
“Excuse me?!”
“I’m hungry. He isn’t gonna destroy the burger places is he? He can’t do that, he just can’t, you know?”
The ball - whose real name is Ryuzaball, but since Momo doesn’t know this it seems pretty strange to mention it, so therefore I won’t - nods, rolling around uncomfortably.
“He’s going to attack the people who makes the hamburgers, Don, and you have to stop him! There is only you! You alone can save our world!”
Momoko listens with half an ear. As long as she gets some food, it’s all right.
*****
Shuuko, with baby Kaoru in her arms, stands in the doorway, waving her little ones off as they’re heading to school. She isn’t quite sure why, but Momoko has seemed a little distracted today, she hasn’t even responded well to Ryoma’s taunts. Which is all well and good, that means Shuuko doesn’t have to punish them, as the house hasn’t been wrecked, but it still bothers the nervous young mother, as I’m sure you can tell. If it were your daughter who went from talking her mouth off at every instant and then turn quiet and almost… intelligent, wouldn’t you be worried?
And then we have the strange ball Momoko is holding. It’s just like a regular tennis ball, but Shuuko swears that when Momoko had thrown the ball through the house - and it had hit Grandpa Tezuka’s head of course - the ball had said: “OUCH!” But that couldn’t be, of course.
“Fuu~shuu,” Baby Kaoru says.
****
They meet up with Kirihara half way to school. Momoko doesn’t like Kirihara. He’s loud and bossy and always fighting with her nii-san. Nii-san doesn’t like Kirihara either, but he does, kind of, Momoko guesses it’s a boy thing and she’ll never understand the finer ways of boy barbarism. Nor does she particularly want to.
THEN IT HAPPENS!
Poor little Momoko doesn’t realize that everything is about to change. She doesn’t realize that when the ground shakes and she and her brother fall down on their knees. She doesn’t realize that when Kirihara is swallowed up by a dark hole that suddenly appears where there used to be a… well, a hole in the ground, yes, but one that leads to the sewers, not to… nothing.
All she realizes is that this is bad, this is very bad, and a strange man stands before them, a huge racket in his hand, and Momoko just knows he has just smashed a huge tennis ball in the ground to cause the quake.
And how does she know this?
Maybe because the huge ball is still there, embedded in the ground.
Or maybe it’s just her feminine intuition speaking. For the sake of her honour, we’ll go with that.
The strange man laughs, and it’s an evil laugh that chills Momoko to the bone.
“I am Sasabeus! I come from the Net-a-verse and you’ll be sorry you ever crossed my path, you sad little Earthlings!”
He takes a few steps closer. And closer. And closer. He swings his racket over his head, around and around and around.
“You,” he barks, pointing at Ryoma. “You have something I can use! You have the ‘MADA’! I’ll take it, and then I’ll be superior!”
“Mada mada da ne,” says Ryoma.
The racket swings.
And swings.
Ryoma’s eyes widens and he falls to his knees.
“M… M… Da… ne…” he croaks, before falling forward, eyes glossed over and he hits the ground with a loud ‘thump’.
Oh no! Our poor little Momoko! She has witnessed the evil Sasabeus rob her brother of his ‘Mada’! The poor little girl stares, eyes wide and tear filled and her long, black braids are tousled around her shoulders. She has never been this scared in her entire life. And her big brother who’s always been there for her can’t help her now! What’s a girl to do?
Why, it’s Ryuzaball to the rescue! Momoko stares as the ball bounces up and down, piping out in its small voice:
“The words, Momo-chan! Remember the words!”
The words? The words? Momoko struggles, tries to remember the words, and why should she remember the words anyway?
Then the words come to her and she screams:
“The Dinosaurs Fear Me!”
And lo and behold, our heroine transforms. She is now Magical Girl Racket Don, and with a pink, peach shaped racket in her hand she bravely steps up to face Sasabeus.
Even though she has no idea what she’s doing, but for her honour’s sake, let us pretend that she does.
“You’ve done something with my Nii-chan,” she roars. “You shouldn’t have done that, you shouldn’t have! Now I’m gonna have to show you how you should treat people younger than yourself, you big bully! I will not stand for people who are rude and make people fall into holes like you do, I will not tolerate that you step on my brother’s catch phrase like it doesn’t mean anything at all, I will not…”
“Are you done talking yet? My ears are starting to bleed.”
Racket Don frowns, gripping her racket harder. How rude of that guy... You shouldn’t do that, you really shouldn’t.
Our sweet little heroine is too caught up in being miffed over her speech being cut short however, and she makes herself an easy target as Sasabeus starts to swing his racket back and forth, balls appearing as he smashes them towards Racket Don.
The girl looks up just in time to avoid being hit, and she jumps out of the way, and boy, can she jump now, high, high up in the air. Unfortunately for her, the balls Sasabeus throw at her can go high, high up in the air as well and she tries to dodge them as well as she can.
Then she is hit by one!
She falls to the ground!
And another ball zones in to finish her off!
Is this the end? Will our sweet little Racket Don die, smashed under a gigantic Tennis Ball? Will the evil Sasabeus succeed?
No. This isn’t the end. Because something unexpected happens. A strange cackle is heard and from the hole-that-was-a-sewer-and-now-is-something-else-but-who-cares-about-that-anyway He appears! He’s clad in mustard yellow. He has black paint around his eyes. His very, very red eyes. And he is handsome. Dashing. Cool. Dangerous. He makes Momoko’s heart stop for a second as she stares and stares and stares.
He whips the ball away, and flashes Momoko a devil-may-care smile. “Get going, beat him!”
And from the depths of her very being, the words form. Her pink peach shaped racket glows and she screams:
“PEACH COLOR SUPER SPECIAL!!!”
And a large peach emerges from the peach shaped racket, and Racket Don smashes the peach right in the face of Sasabeus. He screams, oh, how he screams, writhing in agony as the pink fruit slowly melts him away until all that remains is a word, written in golden letters:
“MADA.”
The word floats calmly through the air, lands on Ryoma’s baseball cap and then sort of melts into it. Into him. Ryoma stirs, moans, and Racket Don sighs in relief. He’s going to be all right.
“Are you crazy or something,” the Ryuzaball roars, bouncing up and down, looking like its ready to pop a vein. “You couldn’t have been slower! Or sloppier! Look at the mess you’ve made here! What kind of magical girl are you?! You’re supposed to be saving the town, not destroy it! You…!”
And on and on the ball goes with the somewhat weird coaching, but Racket Don hears it not, as she has only eyes for the dashing curly haired stranger in the mustard yellow.
“Who… Who are you…?”
“I’m Redeye Ball! I’ll always be there to help you when you need it, Racket Don!”
And with a cackle he disappears.
Momoko, long after she’s transformed back to her regular self, can’t help but dream:
“Redeye Ball… He’d look delicious on a burger…!”
THE END
by gottis_chan
Momoko isn’t sure why she believes the talking, bouncing tennis ball on her bed. Maybe it’s because it is talking. And bouncing. On her bed. It makes no sense, but neither does the fact that she has followed the balls orders and has just now been saying a few random words:
“The Dinosaurs Fear Me!”
As she says that, strange things happens: Her pink dress disappears and instead she is now standing in a white shirt with blue details, a short tennis skirt, tennis shoes and socks, and some ribbons and trinkets here and there, among everything a set of pink sweat bands. She has a broche in the shape of a peach on her chest and tennis ball ear rings in her ears.
“What’s going on?!”
“You’re the magical girl Racket Don now, Momo-chan,” the ball pipes up. “And as I said, time is of the essence! An evil mad man is out trying to destroy the town, and he’ll stop at nothing before he achieves his true goal!”
Momoko considers this thoughtfully.
“I’m hungry.”
It almost looks like the ball face faults.
“Excuse me?!”
“I’m hungry. He isn’t gonna destroy the burger places is he? He can’t do that, he just can’t, you know?”
The ball - whose real name is Ryuzaball, but since Momo doesn’t know this it seems pretty strange to mention it, so therefore I won’t - nods, rolling around uncomfortably.
“He’s going to attack the people who makes the hamburgers, Don, and you have to stop him! There is only you! You alone can save our world!”
Momoko listens with half an ear. As long as she gets some food, it’s all right.
*****
Shuuko, with baby Kaoru in her arms, stands in the doorway, waving her little ones off as they’re heading to school. She isn’t quite sure why, but Momoko has seemed a little distracted today, she hasn’t even responded well to Ryoma’s taunts. Which is all well and good, that means Shuuko doesn’t have to punish them, as the house hasn’t been wrecked, but it still bothers the nervous young mother, as I’m sure you can tell. If it were your daughter who went from talking her mouth off at every instant and then turn quiet and almost… intelligent, wouldn’t you be worried?
And then we have the strange ball Momoko is holding. It’s just like a regular tennis ball, but Shuuko swears that when Momoko had thrown the ball through the house - and it had hit Grandpa Tezuka’s head of course - the ball had said: “OUCH!” But that couldn’t be, of course.
“Fuu~shuu,” Baby Kaoru says.
****
They meet up with Kirihara half way to school. Momoko doesn’t like Kirihara. He’s loud and bossy and always fighting with her nii-san. Nii-san doesn’t like Kirihara either, but he does, kind of, Momoko guesses it’s a boy thing and she’ll never understand the finer ways of boy barbarism. Nor does she particularly want to.
THEN IT HAPPENS!
Poor little Momoko doesn’t realize that everything is about to change. She doesn’t realize that when the ground shakes and she and her brother fall down on their knees. She doesn’t realize that when Kirihara is swallowed up by a dark hole that suddenly appears where there used to be a… well, a hole in the ground, yes, but one that leads to the sewers, not to… nothing.
All she realizes is that this is bad, this is very bad, and a strange man stands before them, a huge racket in his hand, and Momoko just knows he has just smashed a huge tennis ball in the ground to cause the quake.
And how does she know this?
Maybe because the huge ball is still there, embedded in the ground.
Or maybe it’s just her feminine intuition speaking. For the sake of her honour, we’ll go with that.
The strange man laughs, and it’s an evil laugh that chills Momoko to the bone.
“I am Sasabeus! I come from the Net-a-verse and you’ll be sorry you ever crossed my path, you sad little Earthlings!”
He takes a few steps closer. And closer. And closer. He swings his racket over his head, around and around and around.
“You,” he barks, pointing at Ryoma. “You have something I can use! You have the ‘MADA’! I’ll take it, and then I’ll be superior!”
“Mada mada da ne,” says Ryoma.
The racket swings.
And swings.
Ryoma’s eyes widens and he falls to his knees.
“M… M… Da… ne…” he croaks, before falling forward, eyes glossed over and he hits the ground with a loud ‘thump’.
Oh no! Our poor little Momoko! She has witnessed the evil Sasabeus rob her brother of his ‘Mada’! The poor little girl stares, eyes wide and tear filled and her long, black braids are tousled around her shoulders. She has never been this scared in her entire life. And her big brother who’s always been there for her can’t help her now! What’s a girl to do?
Why, it’s Ryuzaball to the rescue! Momoko stares as the ball bounces up and down, piping out in its small voice:
“The words, Momo-chan! Remember the words!”
The words? The words? Momoko struggles, tries to remember the words, and why should she remember the words anyway?
Then the words come to her and she screams:
“The Dinosaurs Fear Me!”
And lo and behold, our heroine transforms. She is now Magical Girl Racket Don, and with a pink, peach shaped racket in her hand she bravely steps up to face Sasabeus.
Even though she has no idea what she’s doing, but for her honour’s sake, let us pretend that she does.
“You’ve done something with my Nii-chan,” she roars. “You shouldn’t have done that, you shouldn’t have! Now I’m gonna have to show you how you should treat people younger than yourself, you big bully! I will not stand for people who are rude and make people fall into holes like you do, I will not tolerate that you step on my brother’s catch phrase like it doesn’t mean anything at all, I will not…”
“Are you done talking yet? My ears are starting to bleed.”
Racket Don frowns, gripping her racket harder. How rude of that guy... You shouldn’t do that, you really shouldn’t.
Our sweet little heroine is too caught up in being miffed over her speech being cut short however, and she makes herself an easy target as Sasabeus starts to swing his racket back and forth, balls appearing as he smashes them towards Racket Don.
The girl looks up just in time to avoid being hit, and she jumps out of the way, and boy, can she jump now, high, high up in the air. Unfortunately for her, the balls Sasabeus throw at her can go high, high up in the air as well and she tries to dodge them as well as she can.
Then she is hit by one!
She falls to the ground!
And another ball zones in to finish her off!
Is this the end? Will our sweet little Racket Don die, smashed under a gigantic Tennis Ball? Will the evil Sasabeus succeed?
No. This isn’t the end. Because something unexpected happens. A strange cackle is heard and from the hole-that-was-a-sewer-and-now-is-something-else-but-who-cares-about-that-anyway He appears! He’s clad in mustard yellow. He has black paint around his eyes. His very, very red eyes. And he is handsome. Dashing. Cool. Dangerous. He makes Momoko’s heart stop for a second as she stares and stares and stares.
He whips the ball away, and flashes Momoko a devil-may-care smile. “Get going, beat him!”
And from the depths of her very being, the words form. Her pink peach shaped racket glows and she screams:
“PEACH COLOR SUPER SPECIAL!!!”
And a large peach emerges from the peach shaped racket, and Racket Don smashes the peach right in the face of Sasabeus. He screams, oh, how he screams, writhing in agony as the pink fruit slowly melts him away until all that remains is a word, written in golden letters:
“MADA.”
The word floats calmly through the air, lands on Ryoma’s baseball cap and then sort of melts into it. Into him. Ryoma stirs, moans, and Racket Don sighs in relief. He’s going to be all right.
“Are you crazy or something,” the Ryuzaball roars, bouncing up and down, looking like its ready to pop a vein. “You couldn’t have been slower! Or sloppier! Look at the mess you’ve made here! What kind of magical girl are you?! You’re supposed to be saving the town, not destroy it! You…!”
And on and on the ball goes with the somewhat weird coaching, but Racket Don hears it not, as she has only eyes for the dashing curly haired stranger in the mustard yellow.
“Who… Who are you…?”
“I’m Redeye Ball! I’ll always be there to help you when you need it, Racket Don!”
And with a cackle he disappears.
Momoko, long after she’s transformed back to her regular self, can’t help but dream:
“Redeye Ball… He’d look delicious on a burger…!”
THE END