fanfic: "a writer's viewpoint" [gossip girl, dan/blair]
Title: A Writer’s Viewpoint
Summary: “He has a realisation that night, on his way home back to Brooklyn - that it’s him and Blair that would make the classic love story.” Blair/Dan drabble, post 4x17
Rating: U
"Oh for Christ’s sake, Humphrey -“
He has a realisation that night, on his way home back to Brooklyn - that it's him and Blair that would make the classic love story, not him and Serena.
--
It goes like this. Detached, sensitive, intense dark-haired boy meets the beautiful golden shining princess of a world he'll never understand or fit into. against all odds they fall in love and move away to his world, the genius writer with his sparkly sunshine angel-muse by his side..
He's deluded, he knows it. He's not really the deep, compelling person he sees himself as, he's awkward and judgemental and just plain Dan Humphrey, and Serena isn't an angel. And if he's completely (painfully) honest, the way he idealised her and she worshipped him would probably prompt most literary scholars to brand their relationship as fantastical and mismatched from the beginning; they’re more of a subverted Angel Clare and Tess Durbeyfield than anything else.
That's not to say he doesn't love Serena, because he does - he loves her so much it hurts his head and heart to even think of her. She's all-consuming and hypnotising. She's his muse. And he's her advisor, her one and only confidante, her saviour--
--there he goes again. Losing himself in that fairytale land of stunning blonde princesses and lost writers who have their happily ever after for ever and ever, always ignoring fat, glaring problems like our parents are married and i'll never fit in/you'll never accept me.
---
It goes like this. Clever outcast meets the beautiful golden shining princess of the world that mocks him and ostracises him. against all odds they fall in love, but tragedy strikes and a misunderstanding (the name georgina still hurts them both) leads to them separating, finally finding each other again when it was too late. the writer had grown up and the princess had gotten bored, and although they still cared for each other very much they never again were quite 'in love' the way they were before.
That's more like it.
---
Him and Blair, on the other hand... they’re a classic. Benedick and Beatrice, Darcy and Elizabeth, heck, Seth and Summer. The wars of wit, the initial hatred, the teen geek and the teen queen. It’s them. They’re the rootable beta-couple.
But he loves Serena, not Blair. God - Jesus - he's not anywhere even close to liking Blair, let alone loving her. Serena's irresponsible and troublesome, she’s stunning in that way, and, Christ, she needs him. Blair... Blair's clever and strong and, besides, he hates her.
Serena's flighty. Serena will never feel anything for too long. Blair's devoted and loyal and oh-so vulnerable because the one man she'd do anything for treats her like crap, and and -
But Blair's the queen bee, the bitch, and they can’t stand each other. So there. They have nothing in common, clearly.
Nate, you, Aaron, you, Gabriel, Carter, Tripp, Nate, you, Colin, you, Nate, you, Ben - and plenty of others in between.
For Blair, it’s just been Nate, Chuck, the British guy, more Nate, Chuck and more Chuck. You know which of the two would be loyal to you in the long run.
She's a cold, soulless snob. And besides, ‘long-run’? There’s not going to be a ‘run’ in the first place.
---
they're sitting in the back closet of Chuck's love suite for Raina and she's fighting back tears, her large brown eyes deeper and more full of repressed emotion than he ever expected of her. suddenly he understands her, he understands her too well -
They're opposites.
- both have lovers more outgoing and charismatic than they'll ever be, lovers who like to frequently fly away and forget you then click their fingers when they need you again. He deliberates whether to comfort her or not, what to say, what to do, and instinctively he slowly starts to covers her tiny hand with his. She snatches it away after a beat, as if she momentarily forgot that she’s Blair Waldorf and he’s Dan Humphrey.
She hates him--
She kissed him.
---
Fine, he admits. He and Blair are perhaps similar people. But that's it. On paper they make the perfect love story, but reality’s reality.
He’s not in love with her and she’s not in love with him. She belongs with Chuck, and he with Serena.
But she isn’t happy with Chuck.
---
She isn’t happy with Chuck.
It’s a thought that’s unexpectedly been plaguing him for weeks, and he’s still mulling over it now. The very mention of Chuck’s name always seems to bring about a tense, almost worn-out look in Blair’s eyes as if the pain he’s causing her is just too exhausting for her to bear anymore - that, he thinks, is no way the look of a happy person. And he’s not sure why it bothers him so much, but the more he thinks about it, the more sick it makes him to think of her crawling back to him again.
Not to mention he’s probably a rapist, he bitterly reminds himself, a dull blow of memories flooding back to him, memories of rooftops and bruises on his little sister’s wrists.
And right then it suddenly hits him. It’s not Serena who’s wounded and tortured and in desperate need of a saviour - it’s Blair.
Not only that, but the only time he’s ever really seen her truly relaxed, content, is when she’s watching movies or at an art gallery opening; in other words, when she’s with him.
Could it be that - no, no, no...
Dan Humphrey makes Blair Waldorf... happy.
He tries to laugh, but it comes out forced and empty.
--
"Oh for Christ’s sake, Humphrey -“
She seizes his collar and hauls his body forward, pressing her lips against his before he has time to respond. An overwhelming scent of delicate, powdery perfume engulfs him and he can’t help but draw her in closer, gingerly pulling her petit frame into his, overcome by the faint taste of champagne diffusing from the sudden soft lips on his. Her hands rapidly wrap themselves round his neck, her soft hair brushing his cheek. It’s only the feel of the expensive lace of her dress beneath his fingertips that reminds him this is Blair Waldorf and he should not be enjoying this, and despite how distinctly weird this is, he can’t help but think how this isn’t actually too bad...
Apparently she has the same disconcerting thought because she suddenly leaps away from him, an unreadable expression gracing her features. They’re both speechless, his mouth still hanging open both from shock and attempting to respond to her kiss. Before charging into her room with a swift slam of the door, she abruptly presses a chaste kiss on his cheek, leaving him almost dizzy with shock and confusion.
He, Dan Humphrey, kissed Blair Waldorf. And enjoyed it.
And if he’s not mistaken, she enjoyed it too.
--
He has a realisation that night, on his way home back to Brooklyn - that it's him and Blair that would make the classic love story, not him and Serena.
-------
Notes: So, this was just my take on Dan’s thought process after the kiss that would eventually lead him into the state of mind he had in 4x18. He totally likes Blair, and I really think she’s in denial too! *waves Dair pom-poms*
About the Tess/Angel comparison to Serena/Dan - both couples have timing as an issue (Serena telling Dan about Georgina too late, Tess telling Angel about Alec too late, etc), both couples idealise each other too much which contributes to their eventual breakdowns and both let their different social classes get in the way of their relationship, only in SD’s case the man is poor and he has a disdain for the rich, hence the “subversion”. As you can see, I’ve thought about this way too much xD