uh... you have an interesting subject matter here, but you aren't making a very good case for yourself. things like 'Hearing people are a bunch of stubborn jerks.' is just emotionally-charged opinion, not really bringing across anything in your... thesis...
i have to get to bed, but i'd be glad to help later. You are probably going for something like 'Hearing loss causes an unjust level of bias in many audiocentric social situations' rather than just a lot of complaining. you want to make a couple paragraphs that explain that in a way that theoretically wouldn't be offensive, unless that is the goal of the assignment, as it'd be easier to get the point across to the audience if you aren't insulting them. (I would think you would prefer that a hearing cashier that read this change her attitude about deaf people rather than throw it away and just feel offended by you.)
or if the assignment is just to be offensive, you could probably work it up to be even more offensive. like compare hearing people to the WW2 gestapo or something, or
I agree with Joe: I like the idea but you can be more convincing. For example, you could say, "If a store trains its cashiers to understand and use a few basic signs, deaf people will feel welcome and will therefore be more likely to shop at that store," to convince a business owner. Or to persuade a cashier: "Have you ever tried to help a customer, only to realize that she was deaf and you couldn't communicate? You can avoid feeling embarrassed in the future by taking just a little time to learn sign language."
If you want to be persuasive you should assume the best about your audience and write from that perspective. Tell them that they might not realize that they are prejudiced but that they can take a few simple steps to be more friendly to deaf people.
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i have to get to bed, but i'd be glad to help later. You are probably going for something like 'Hearing loss causes an unjust level of bias in many audiocentric social situations' rather than just a lot of complaining. you want to make a couple paragraphs that explain that in a way that theoretically wouldn't be offensive, unless that is the goal of the assignment, as it'd be easier to get the point across to the audience if you aren't insulting them. (I would think you would prefer that a hearing cashier that read this change her attitude about deaf people rather than throw it away and just feel offended by you.)
or if the assignment is just to be offensive, you could probably work it up to be even more offensive. like compare hearing people to the WW2 gestapo or something, or
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If you want to be persuasive you should assume the best about your audience and write from that perspective. Tell them that they might not realize that they are prejudiced but that they can take a few simple steps to be more friendly to deaf people.
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