Fic: Ti, a drink with jam and bread
"Carol tells me you're angry."
Ginny's frown was closer to confusion at why and how that sentence was coming out of her father's mouth, but it was a frown.
"I see she's right."
She looked away.
"Want to talk about it?"
And she looked back with wide eyes.
"With you?"
"Yeah. Sure. Why not?"
She thought: Because a father-daughter chat about boy troubles, friend troubles, team troubles, self-esteem issues, or all of the above has never even occurred to me as a possibility let alone occurred in reality.
She said, "Do you have any idea what's going on?"
"I was under the impression my ideas were at the heart of it. "
She looked at him as if he might be mad. In the hatter way.
"Unless you mean you and Mr. Parker."
Ginny scowled and fell back against her pillow. Tony took this as a positive turn in the conversation and sat beside her.
"Why are you angry?"
"I feel like I'm not allowed to be mad at him."
"You're allowed to be anything."
She answered with a Look.
He Looked right back.
"Bianca and I have plans to bring in a negotiator. For the team."
Tony nodded. "That's very responsible of you. It's not the topic at hand."
Another scowl and she flopped even further into her pillow. "Maybe I don't want to talk about the topic at hand right now."
"I have meetings all afternoon." His tone was direct and matter-of-fact. But she took it as the rejection she was waiting for.
"I won't keep you from them," she replied through tight lips.
"Right now, I want to talk to you."
He was met with silence.
"I understand your Ben wants to talk to you, too."
This was met with shouting. "He's not my Ben."
"Not always."
"Not ever!"
Tony sat back. "I don't agree."
She rolled her eyes. "How would you know?"
A moment passed. Ginny picked at invisible threads on her bedspread.
"Do you know why Amelia -- and her mother -- get attention?"
She rolled her eyes again. "She flounces around and forces it. She has a fit if you aren't paying attention." Ginny had had just about enough of it, too. Everything everywhere doesn't have to come down to what Amelia wants.
"That's right."
Her head whipped around. "I shouldn't have to have a temper tantrum to be noticed!"
"You don't."
This conversation was infuriating.
"What do you mean? Why can't anyone just say what they mean?"
Tony leaned forward again. "Why did I have to hear about your life from Carol?"
"How is that my fault?" She was, in the moment, the spitting image of her mother.
"Why are you angry?"
"Because I'm tired of being set aside for good behavior!" It was patently ridiculous that no one cared about her because she was too polite or calm or reasonable or -- okay that makes her sound really boring but it is still not fair!
"Does Amelia get awarded for bad behavior?"
Ginny fell back again, annoyed. "Not awarded but ... She gets all the attention. Always."
"You think she's undeserving."
She sighed. "No. That's not what I mean."
"You think she takes it for granted."
She thought a moment longer this time but answered "No," again. "Not really."
"You feel left out."
"I guess? No. ...I just want to be the most important person to someone." Instantly she hated how whiny that sounds.
"You're the most important person to your mother."
It bothered her that another father -- like Amelia's probably -- would have said she was most important to him. But it wasn't surprising and she knew it was because saving the world was always most important. No one can compete with a world in need of saving.
It was also not worth saying it wasn't her mother's attention she wanted.
"He didn't trust me to help. It was more important to not disappoint her than me."
"Triage."
She frowned. "What?"
"Making a decision based on who's most likely to bleed out."
"This wasn't a life or death situation, Dad. Nobody's bleeding out."
"You're certain?"
"She does it all the time!" She sounded angry but not actually certain.
"Why are you angry?"
She threw up her hands. "Why do you keep asking that?! "
"I want the real answer."
"I told you! I'll never be important enough. Not to Ben, not to you, not to anybody."
"That's only part of it."
"Amelia is a spoiled brat. I don't want to be like her."
"No one wants you to be like her."
"You do!" Isn't that what the 'try being demanding' pep talk was about?
"No."
Ginny was going to cry any second and he was as calm as he always is. She wanted to scream but it wouldn't do any good. Briefly she thought maybe this was how Amelia felt before she ran away.
"I feel useless."
"Are you?"
She threw a pillow at him. He caught it.
"You're not useless."
"She's supposed to be my best friend and he's supposed to be my boyfriend and I can't help either. They won't let me try."
"Carol says you're not taking his calls."
Ginny looked away as the tears finally began to fall. "It's my fault. That's what you're saying. That's why Carol called you and that's why we're talking at all."
"No."
She looked up; eyes full of tears implored him to answer her. "Then what? What's your point?"
"Why are you really angry?"
She shook her head in frustration, but answered. "Because I want to help and no one will let me."
"What can you do about that?"
She thought through their conversation. "...Make them let me."
"How can you do that?"
"Talk to Ben."
"That's my point."
She flopped into her pillow once again. "Fine. Next time you should lead with that."
He could say he had, but instead he said, "Really?"
He got a small but genuine smile in response. "No." He put the pillow in her hands and leaned close to kiss her forehead.
Ginny's frown was closer to confusion at why and how that sentence was coming out of her father's mouth, but it was a frown.
"I see she's right."
She looked away.
"Want to talk about it?"
And she looked back with wide eyes.
"With you?"
"Yeah. Sure. Why not?"
She thought: Because a father-daughter chat about boy troubles, friend troubles, team troubles, self-esteem issues, or all of the above has never even occurred to me as a possibility let alone occurred in reality.
She said, "Do you have any idea what's going on?"
"I was under the impression my ideas were at the heart of it. "
She looked at him as if he might be mad. In the hatter way.
"Unless you mean you and Mr. Parker."
Ginny scowled and fell back against her pillow. Tony took this as a positive turn in the conversation and sat beside her.
"Why are you angry?"
"I feel like I'm not allowed to be mad at him."
"You're allowed to be anything."
She answered with a Look.
He Looked right back.
"Bianca and I have plans to bring in a negotiator. For the team."
Tony nodded. "That's very responsible of you. It's not the topic at hand."
Another scowl and she flopped even further into her pillow. "Maybe I don't want to talk about the topic at hand right now."
"I have meetings all afternoon." His tone was direct and matter-of-fact. But she took it as the rejection she was waiting for.
"I won't keep you from them," she replied through tight lips.
"Right now, I want to talk to you."
He was met with silence.
"I understand your Ben wants to talk to you, too."
This was met with shouting. "He's not my Ben."
"Not always."
"Not ever!"
Tony sat back. "I don't agree."
She rolled her eyes. "How would you know?"
A moment passed. Ginny picked at invisible threads on her bedspread.
"Do you know why Amelia -- and her mother -- get attention?"
She rolled her eyes again. "She flounces around and forces it. She has a fit if you aren't paying attention." Ginny had had just about enough of it, too. Everything everywhere doesn't have to come down to what Amelia wants.
"That's right."
Her head whipped around. "I shouldn't have to have a temper tantrum to be noticed!"
"You don't."
This conversation was infuriating.
"What do you mean? Why can't anyone just say what they mean?"
Tony leaned forward again. "Why did I have to hear about your life from Carol?"
"How is that my fault?" She was, in the moment, the spitting image of her mother.
"Why are you angry?"
"Because I'm tired of being set aside for good behavior!" It was patently ridiculous that no one cared about her because she was too polite or calm or reasonable or -- okay that makes her sound really boring but it is still not fair!
"Does Amelia get awarded for bad behavior?"
Ginny fell back again, annoyed. "Not awarded but ... She gets all the attention. Always."
"You think she's undeserving."
She sighed. "No. That's not what I mean."
"You think she takes it for granted."
She thought a moment longer this time but answered "No," again. "Not really."
"You feel left out."
"I guess? No. ...I just want to be the most important person to someone." Instantly she hated how whiny that sounds.
"You're the most important person to your mother."
It bothered her that another father -- like Amelia's probably -- would have said she was most important to him. But it wasn't surprising and she knew it was because saving the world was always most important. No one can compete with a world in need of saving.
It was also not worth saying it wasn't her mother's attention she wanted.
"He didn't trust me to help. It was more important to not disappoint her than me."
"Triage."
She frowned. "What?"
"Making a decision based on who's most likely to bleed out."
"This wasn't a life or death situation, Dad. Nobody's bleeding out."
"You're certain?"
"She does it all the time!" She sounded angry but not actually certain.
"Why are you angry?"
She threw up her hands. "Why do you keep asking that?! "
"I want the real answer."
"I told you! I'll never be important enough. Not to Ben, not to you, not to anybody."
"That's only part of it."
"Amelia is a spoiled brat. I don't want to be like her."
"No one wants you to be like her."
"You do!" Isn't that what the 'try being demanding' pep talk was about?
"No."
Ginny was going to cry any second and he was as calm as he always is. She wanted to scream but it wouldn't do any good. Briefly she thought maybe this was how Amelia felt before she ran away.
"I feel useless."
"Are you?"
She threw a pillow at him. He caught it.
"You're not useless."
"She's supposed to be my best friend and he's supposed to be my boyfriend and I can't help either. They won't let me try."
"Carol says you're not taking his calls."
Ginny looked away as the tears finally began to fall. "It's my fault. That's what you're saying. That's why Carol called you and that's why we're talking at all."
"No."
She looked up; eyes full of tears implored him to answer her. "Then what? What's your point?"
"Why are you really angry?"
She shook her head in frustration, but answered. "Because I want to help and no one will let me."
"What can you do about that?"
She thought through their conversation. "...Make them let me."
"How can you do that?"
"Talk to Ben."
"That's my point."
She flopped into her pillow once again. "Fine. Next time you should lead with that."
He could say he had, but instead he said, "Really?"
He got a small but genuine smile in response. "No." He put the pillow in her hands and leaned close to kiss her forehead.