when will this get easier?

[girlsetsfire_]

i am facing one of the biggest changes i'll ever have to face. graduating. something i'm unprepared and unwilling to do. something that affects my life monumentally. now, there's an entirely new "change" to throw in as well. the love of my life, my fucking soulmate & roommate & partner in crime, doesn't love me anymore. how am i supposed to handle

Comments

[miss_fitzz]

it honestly seems like he's doing this just to "get back" at you. that's the only reason i could think of. what a dick, though.

and people DO care about you, even if they don't voice it. i'm sure all your friends are having the same thoughts that you are-- it's a weird stage in life, man.

[girlsetsfire_]

he says it's not in retalliation. that he just doesn't feel for me the way he used to. but i cannot fathom how his thoughts and feelings for me changed in literally a matter of hours.

when i picture my life a decade from now, a year from now, a month from now, an hour from now - he is always right by my side, making my imperfections seem beautiful.

and now what am i left as? a lonely girl with imperfections, who will never be able to look at herself as beautiful ever again.

we always said we'd remain best friends no matter what. and he even mentions that now - he wants my friendship still, even though that sounds selfish. and i am willing to give it. but are friends supposed to turn and walk away when they see the other crying?

i really feel that he still loves me and our relationship could end up being twenty times healthier and more beautiful than it was. but he won't give it a chance. which i guess is the most obvious signal that he wants no part of me anymore.

[miss_fitzz]

well i don't believe him when he says it's not retalliation. of course he'd never admit to it, ya know? because then he'll realize what a dick he is being. just give it time i suppose. and you're beautiful with or without him; you dont need him there to confirm that fact.