How do you deal with betrayal?

[giwu]

I am now waiting for my dog to return home and I am stuck with very little to do.  I got to thinking about a couple of things and this ended up being a lot longer than what I thought it would be.  Sorry, no smut!

So, a few months ago I was in for a routine follow-up doctor’s appointment and she was running through the usual list of questions.  We

Comments

[kosmickway]

It bothers me that a man can cheat, then ‘upgrade’ or go back to wife, leave a life destroyed and think he should not be held accountable in any way. I can tell you after the breakups, my school work, my job performance, they all took a nose dive. I guess the spouse is supposed to be passive and not divorce him and the ‘other woman’ is supposed to just accept she got screwed and quietly move on with her life (also passive behavior). I agree. A guy I was dating about a year ago turned out to be married and I received a call from his wife-- not an irate call, but an "I want to tell you that my husband is a dog and does this all the time, you totally do not deserve this" call. It was humiliating for me and for her, and severely pissed me off

[giwu]

Geez, I am so glad his wife was decent with you. I am also glad she called you before it could go any further...and I am really glad you are not her

[elfling65]

OY! I'm sorry you have gone through so much! I think I would have sworn off men by now.

I've told my hubby what would happen if I ever found he was cheating. I'd kill him then divorce him, in that order. God help the bitch that he was cheating with, she'd not survive either. Not that I have aggression issues or anything *rolls eyes*.

I would definitely call the wife, I know that I would want to know if my partner was cheating on me. Considering all the nasty shit you can get from unprotected sex? CHRIST! Just the thought of being single scares the crap out of me. Such utter lack of respect is frightening to me, especially since he knew what he was doing to you from the very beginning. Making his life uncomfortable or down right painful seems fair to me. If she knows and doesn't care, that's pretty pathetic, and sad.

[giwu]

Teasing...has your husband pointed out that if your do the former, the latter won't be required, or is he scared of you? Either way, I will be sending you hacksaws in cake until you claw your way out! Somehow, you don't strike me as the type of person who would marry a man who could keep a girlfiend in the dark for X number of years about his marital status. You probably wouldn't open a can of Elf-ass on her if she was ignorant

[beelikej]

I have not been in a relationship, nor do I ever expect to be, since I'm quite happy on my own. But hypothetically speaking: I would tell the partner, for exactly the reasons you stated.

[giwu]

You are nine months younger than I am and so much more secure than I am (insert some mock and sincere envy here). I don't want to be alone for the rest of my life...and I would really like some consistent on a regular basis uhm....snuggling.

Been thinking about you and Bonnie a lot-my town is on its last day of Tulip Time, celebrating its Dutch heritage. Lots of wooden shoes and tourists running around here.

[beelikej]

Well, ehm, snuggling would be nice, but if it means losing a little of myself, I can do without;)

Also: in a comment above you wonder why women stay with cheating men? I fear it's for the reason you hint at yourself: because they are afraid of being alone. That makes me sad.

Oh no: not wooden shoes*! We stole the tulips from the Turks in the Golden Age, but I don't mind getting credit for those:)
*Okay, I admit I have worn those when I was a little kid. Great for walking on soggy gras;)

[giwu]

Oh, you would be in sheer hell...Wooden shoes, Dutch costumes from all the provinces from 200 years ago, Dutch dances with wonderful polka music, vetballen, poferrjees, dutch letters. And lots of Tulips!

Check out the link here: www.pellatuliptime.com

And I wore a Dutch costume and wooden shoes...I was a Dutch Dancer for three years during high school.