Paul, the deceitful cancer guy
As I stated in a comment in my last post, I've found myself ready more than a half hour ahead of when I need to leave so I have some time to go over this story. I suspect 30 mins will be ample. This tale isn't particularly long or complicated.
The setting starts in Feb 2008 when I worked at the grocery store beside where we live. I worked there until April when I started at a wine retail location because the grocery store is unionised so my hours were crap and my union dues were about half my weekly paycheque. Not harping on unions in general, just saying that setup was not good for my finances.
While I worked there I met a guy named Paul. The name is common enough I don't feel a need to hide it. Anyway, working in the same place we came to chat and I took a bit of a fancy to him and wanted to start a friendship. I'll admit it was a bit of a crush but I was in a relationship with my bf who I was living with (and still do) and I certainly wasn't going to cheat. But friends never hurts. So he seemed up to hanging out sometime and so I gave him my number. He never phoned and claimed he lost it so I gave it again. In that three month span, I gave him my phone number far more than I should've (maybe 5-6 times) but after the second time it almost became a game for me. I was certain he wasn't going to call and he never did even when he said he was going to call on a specific date or time.
Now, he's about 40, so it's not typical for someone his age to be working part time at a grocery store and I had asked him about it because I'm curious like that. He told me that he has a bone cancer as well as cancer in some other area (it's convoluted) and that he was basically working there while he had the strength to do so, and because they were easy on giving him time off for treatment. Okay, makes sense. It also looked like he was wearing a wig (not obvious, actually) and he has a definite limp (I've theorised it's a prosthetic) so the cancer was plausible enough and I had no reason to doubt his honesty.
Fine, either he was clueless or not interested. So I was relieved to change jobs because it would make things easier as well. Life went on and I mostly forgot about him.
When trying to remember when this was, my bf and I have theorised this was probably around September of 2009. Either way, this was about a year and a half since I worked at the grocery store. My bf and I had broken up in May and by this point I was thinking of us getting back together again and was pretty sure I was going to do so very soon. Now, I'd noticed I hadn't seen Paul in some time and I felt a bit sorry and wondered if he had succumbed to the cancer. So I was honestly pleased and relieved to see him one day, though he looked more gaunt and pallid. Certainly the cancer is taking its toll.
He pulls me aside to chat in an aisle. Okay, fine, whatever. He started asking me if I had been interested in him before, and he told me that he was interested in me before but never acted on it because I had a boyfriend. I pointed out I had tried at least a friendship, but he evaded that point. As the conversation progressed I became unsettled. Partly because I don't like talking about personal details in the middle of a grocery store, but something about this conversation bugged me and I couldn't figure out what it was. In the process of the conversation he had even asked me if when I was interested if I'd have "gone all the way" with him, and if he were to go on a date if I'd let him kiss me. I kept thinking, "WTF?" but kept going along with the conversation and dodging committing to details. At one point he tried to suddenly kiss me, but I quickly turned my head away. I told him I didn't like talking about this in a grocery store but he ignored me. Anyway, he asked if he could take me out on a date and I accepted reluctantly, figuring if nothing else I'd score a free meal and movie. My "roommate" met me at the grocery store during all of this and found me talking with Paul. Unprovoked, Paul introduced himself to sarlacc000. Naturally, sarlacc000 was startled by this. I wanted to facepalm. I, apologetically, told him that Paul had asked me out and that I'd accepted. Anyway, feeling like he'd saved me from this torturous conversation, we went to a cashier.
I must've, just by chance, picked the wrong (or right?) cashier. Paul came up to the register as though he was trying to talk with me, but the cashier struck up chatting with him instead. Based on the conversation, it sounded like he had been showing interest in her and had offered to buy her coffee, but she kept putting him down and calling him "stupid" and obviously was not interested in him. But honestly, it was obvious that he'd been flirting with her.
"A ha!" I thought, figuring that this certainly confirmed my suspicions that something wasn't right about the previous conversation, and I was now certain he asked me out to hedge his bets. Not wanting to be played like that, I told sarlacc000 that I was going to fail to show up for the date. We made up that evening and we're still together now, for what it's worth.
The 7th of April was my bf's 30th birthday. Being stupid, I hadn't bought a cake during the day while he was at work. So, I ran out at ten minutes to 9, hoping to buy a lemon cake before the grocery store closed. Well, turns out they don't sell lemon cakes anymore (bastards!) so I got a normal white cake, his second favourite.
While I was lined up I happened to see Paul. Ah crap. He was asking me to come over to him so we could chat. I pointed at the cake and said "I have to buy this first." He kept being insistent but I was firm and was NOT going to leave the register without paying for the cake (I worked there as a cashier and I know they'll close the register and I'd be out of luck if I delayed any longer.) He looked frustrated by it, but stayed where he was.
Having bought the cake, I walked quickly to where he was. I had every intention of making this conversation as short as possible because I had a birthday boyfriend waiting back home. Paul asked me why I didn't show up, so I told him about how he was flirting with the cashier and that I don't like people who try to mess with me and so I didn't show up. He claimed he wasn't flirting (even my bf says it was obvious flirting) and he also claimed that he had brought a dozen pink roses when he was going to meet me. "Well, it'll make your house smell nice." was my reply to that. After a few minutes I said I had to go because it was my boyfriends' birthday. His face darkened a bit (haha!). "Oh, you have a boyfriend." He asked for my phone number so we could talk the next day. Sure, whatever, I gave him my number and figured that, like every tiem previously, he wasn't going to phone.
He phoned on Friday. (D'oh!)
I played along with the conversation, because I was raised well and I was trying to be polite. We talked AGAIN about how I hadn't shown up, and how he was still interested in me and he wanted to know if I was interested in him. I told him that it had been 2 years since I worked there and by now my feelings were neutral. I told him I'm not the only female out there and he should go ahead and try for anyone else. He replied "You're the only one I'm interested in." I rolled my eyes and sighed in exasperation. Thankfully he couldn't see the eyeroll. Anyway, I persisted that my life is not going well right now, I'm satisfied in my relationship, and I am not willing or planning on disrupting my relationship situation.
That's when he said the line that started my griping a few days ago.
The sheer audacity of such a statement made my jaw drop. Getting myself together I reiterated that I'm not breaking up with my boyfriend. So he wanted to talk about this again "next week." Actually what he wanted was to meet at a Tim Horton's (lol no) to discuss this and I refused, giving a lame (but real) excuse about having to clean the apartment so it'd be best if he just phoned. But I told him only phone in the afternoon because I'm usually not awake in the morning and not to call Tuesday because I have an appointment and will be out.
He phoned Monday at 1, but incidentally I was still in bed but had just woken up. He didn't leave a message. I only know it's him because call ID showed it was him.
Today, Tuesday, he's phoned at 9:30 and again around 11:30.
Crap, it's 12:30, I have to leave. Anyway, by now I'm fed up and through playing along and being polite. I thought about toying with the conversation to try and get him to confess his intentions, but his inability to follow my directions for phoning has me too pissed off to pull it off. Either he's desperate to get laid before he dies and I'm the only female he has left to ask (hence why he's never been content with an offer of friendship), or he's intentionally manipulative. Either way, he's out of luck and I'm ready to tell him to never speak with me again.
The setting starts in Feb 2008 when I worked at the grocery store beside where we live. I worked there until April when I started at a wine retail location because the grocery store is unionised so my hours were crap and my union dues were about half my weekly paycheque. Not harping on unions in general, just saying that setup was not good for my finances.
While I worked there I met a guy named Paul. The name is common enough I don't feel a need to hide it. Anyway, working in the same place we came to chat and I took a bit of a fancy to him and wanted to start a friendship. I'll admit it was a bit of a crush but I was in a relationship with my bf who I was living with (and still do) and I certainly wasn't going to cheat. But friends never hurts. So he seemed up to hanging out sometime and so I gave him my number. He never phoned and claimed he lost it so I gave it again. In that three month span, I gave him my phone number far more than I should've (maybe 5-6 times) but after the second time it almost became a game for me. I was certain he wasn't going to call and he never did even when he said he was going to call on a specific date or time.
Now, he's about 40, so it's not typical for someone his age to be working part time at a grocery store and I had asked him about it because I'm curious like that. He told me that he has a bone cancer as well as cancer in some other area (it's convoluted) and that he was basically working there while he had the strength to do so, and because they were easy on giving him time off for treatment. Okay, makes sense. It also looked like he was wearing a wig (not obvious, actually) and he has a definite limp (I've theorised it's a prosthetic) so the cancer was plausible enough and I had no reason to doubt his honesty.
Fine, either he was clueless or not interested. So I was relieved to change jobs because it would make things easier as well. Life went on and I mostly forgot about him.
When trying to remember when this was, my bf and I have theorised this was probably around September of 2009. Either way, this was about a year and a half since I worked at the grocery store. My bf and I had broken up in May and by this point I was thinking of us getting back together again and was pretty sure I was going to do so very soon. Now, I'd noticed I hadn't seen Paul in some time and I felt a bit sorry and wondered if he had succumbed to the cancer. So I was honestly pleased and relieved to see him one day, though he looked more gaunt and pallid. Certainly the cancer is taking its toll.
He pulls me aside to chat in an aisle. Okay, fine, whatever. He started asking me if I had been interested in him before, and he told me that he was interested in me before but never acted on it because I had a boyfriend. I pointed out I had tried at least a friendship, but he evaded that point. As the conversation progressed I became unsettled. Partly because I don't like talking about personal details in the middle of a grocery store, but something about this conversation bugged me and I couldn't figure out what it was. In the process of the conversation he had even asked me if when I was interested if I'd have "gone all the way" with him, and if he were to go on a date if I'd let him kiss me. I kept thinking, "WTF?" but kept going along with the conversation and dodging committing to details. At one point he tried to suddenly kiss me, but I quickly turned my head away. I told him I didn't like talking about this in a grocery store but he ignored me. Anyway, he asked if he could take me out on a date and I accepted reluctantly, figuring if nothing else I'd score a free meal and movie. My "roommate" met me at the grocery store during all of this and found me talking with Paul. Unprovoked, Paul introduced himself to sarlacc000. Naturally, sarlacc000 was startled by this. I wanted to facepalm. I, apologetically, told him that Paul had asked me out and that I'd accepted. Anyway, feeling like he'd saved me from this torturous conversation, we went to a cashier.
I must've, just by chance, picked the wrong (or right?) cashier. Paul came up to the register as though he was trying to talk with me, but the cashier struck up chatting with him instead. Based on the conversation, it sounded like he had been showing interest in her and had offered to buy her coffee, but she kept putting him down and calling him "stupid" and obviously was not interested in him. But honestly, it was obvious that he'd been flirting with her.
"A ha!" I thought, figuring that this certainly confirmed my suspicions that something wasn't right about the previous conversation, and I was now certain he asked me out to hedge his bets. Not wanting to be played like that, I told sarlacc000 that I was going to fail to show up for the date. We made up that evening and we're still together now, for what it's worth.
The 7th of April was my bf's 30th birthday. Being stupid, I hadn't bought a cake during the day while he was at work. So, I ran out at ten minutes to 9, hoping to buy a lemon cake before the grocery store closed. Well, turns out they don't sell lemon cakes anymore (bastards!) so I got a normal white cake, his second favourite.
While I was lined up I happened to see Paul. Ah crap. He was asking me to come over to him so we could chat. I pointed at the cake and said "I have to buy this first." He kept being insistent but I was firm and was NOT going to leave the register without paying for the cake (I worked there as a cashier and I know they'll close the register and I'd be out of luck if I delayed any longer.) He looked frustrated by it, but stayed where he was.
Having bought the cake, I walked quickly to where he was. I had every intention of making this conversation as short as possible because I had a birthday boyfriend waiting back home. Paul asked me why I didn't show up, so I told him about how he was flirting with the cashier and that I don't like people who try to mess with me and so I didn't show up. He claimed he wasn't flirting (even my bf says it was obvious flirting) and he also claimed that he had brought a dozen pink roses when he was going to meet me. "Well, it'll make your house smell nice." was my reply to that. After a few minutes I said I had to go because it was my boyfriends' birthday. His face darkened a bit (haha!). "Oh, you have a boyfriend." He asked for my phone number so we could talk the next day. Sure, whatever, I gave him my number and figured that, like every tiem previously, he wasn't going to phone.
He phoned on Friday. (D'oh!)
I played along with the conversation, because I was raised well and I was trying to be polite. We talked AGAIN about how I hadn't shown up, and how he was still interested in me and he wanted to know if I was interested in him. I told him that it had been 2 years since I worked there and by now my feelings were neutral. I told him I'm not the only female out there and he should go ahead and try for anyone else. He replied "You're the only one I'm interested in." I rolled my eyes and sighed in exasperation. Thankfully he couldn't see the eyeroll. Anyway, I persisted that my life is not going well right now, I'm satisfied in my relationship, and I am not willing or planning on disrupting my relationship situation.
That's when he said the line that started my griping a few days ago.
The sheer audacity of such a statement made my jaw drop. Getting myself together I reiterated that I'm not breaking up with my boyfriend. So he wanted to talk about this again "next week." Actually what he wanted was to meet at a Tim Horton's (lol no) to discuss this and I refused, giving a lame (but real) excuse about having to clean the apartment so it'd be best if he just phoned. But I told him only phone in the afternoon because I'm usually not awake in the morning and not to call Tuesday because I have an appointment and will be out.
He phoned Monday at 1, but incidentally I was still in bed but had just woken up. He didn't leave a message. I only know it's him because call ID showed it was him.
Today, Tuesday, he's phoned at 9:30 and again around 11:30.
Crap, it's 12:30, I have to leave. Anyway, by now I'm fed up and through playing along and being polite. I thought about toying with the conversation to try and get him to confess his intentions, but his inability to follow my directions for phoning has me too pissed off to pull it off. Either he's desperate to get laid before he dies and I'm the only female he has left to ask (hence why he's never been content with an offer of friendship), or he's intentionally manipulative. Either way, he's out of luck and I'm ready to tell him to never speak with me again.