Holiday From Real - extra scenes
Title: Holiday From Real
Author: gluckspirat
Artist: loverstar
Fandom: CW RPF
Genre: Slash, AU.
Pairing: Jensen Ackles/Jared Padalecki
Rating: R
Disclaimer: The following story is fiction and it never happened. I don't know nor own the characters.
Word count: 39,975
Summary: Jared's life finally seems to be on track: he's living with his friend Chad, studying what he loves, and now that he's working for his mother, he can afford both things. Even the introduction of Jensen Ackles to the picture doesn't appear to shake things up much - he's charming and hot and funny, and Jared feels an instant attraction, but it's just another crush on a straight guy and Jared's positive he'll get over it. That is, until Jensen starts flirting back and sending Jared mixed signs - which would be great, really, if it wasn't for the tiny little fact that Jensen's getting married, and that he's chosen Jared's mom's catering business to serve at his wedding.
#1: Chad first meets Chris.
The bar is completely packed and all Chad can smell is the sweat and alcohol coming out of other people's bodies. He's lost Zach and Milo into the crowd a while ago when they left with those girls who certainly didn't look legal in Chad's eyes, but really, he couldn't care less at the moment.
He's heading straight towards a guy sitting at the bar, both forearms placed over the wooden surface, long hair falling over his broad shoulders. The guy's just gotten off the stage and Chad swears he can see the skin on his neck glistening in the sexiest way.
"Hey," he plasters a grin on his face, and slides into the empty stool next to the guy. "Great show, man."
The guy looks at him, his face unreadable. "Thanks."
"Seriously, you were awesome." Chad's been known for sucking up to people every now and then, little white lies that get him where he wants to be - which is generally inside the other person's pants - but this time, he's being honest. This guy and the other one, he thinks the band was called Kane or something close, really rocked, and though their music wasn't what Chad usually listens to, he found himself nodding his head to the beat and wanting more after their set was over. And this guy has clearly heard how good he is way too many times, as the only thing he does is smile at Chad for a brief second before looking away. "I'm Chad." Again, nothing but a smile. Chad raises his eyebrows slightly. "And you're...?"
Finally, the guy meets his gaze for more than a second and shows him a crooked grin. "Too old for you."
Chad shakes his head with a snort and ignores his words - just as he ignores the way his stomach turns a little at the other man's smile. "Can I buy you a beer, then?"
The guy lets out a low chuckle. "Cute," he says, and then he stands up and leaves.
Huh. Well. That's new. Chad's not too used to being let down, but he's not one to give up, either. Especially when this guy is so hot, and has a killer smile that's making Chad's body react in ways it never has before.
So he calls the bartender over, a woman who squints at him as if wondering if Chad's of age, and he asks for two beers. He makes sure his voice sounds weak and unsure enough just hoping she'll ask to see his ID - hell, after years of trying to look old, now he's dying to pull it out every chance he has just to show it off - but she simply nods her head and brings him the two drinks.
Chad pays and then quickly looks around, his eyes searching the crowd while looking for his guy. He catches a few flirtatious girls batting their eyelashes at him, but he feels like he's on a mission now, and he's not backing out, so he ignores them.
Finally, he spots him at the other end of the bar, alone. Chad can barely hold back his smirk. Oh, please. He practically has a sign saying 'come hit on me! I'm free!', he thinks. So he goes to do exactly that.
"What're you doing?" The guy asks as Chad sits next to him again, holding one beer in each hand, but the frown on his face is more amused than pissed off.
Chad grins. "Oh, nothing. I bought one beer and the bartender gave me this one for free. I think she has a crush on me or something."
The man laughs, his entire face lightning up and losing the few threatening signs that were still showing. Chad falls in love with the sound instantly - and no, that's not too girly, sounds are cool and manly and it's not like he's falling over the dude's hair. Which, by the way, is pretty awesome, too.
"Yeah, especially 'cause her husband is right over there." The guy nods his head at somewhere over Chad's shoulder, but he's really not interested in seeing the bartender's man, so his eyes don't move from the other's face.
"Yeah, well. Many women make the mistake of getting married before meeting me." He throws in a smirk after his words just so the guy knows he's just kidding, and for that he gets another laugh. "So, uh. I guess I'll just leave this here," he says, placing one drink over the bar, "and maybe someone will want it."
Finally, finally, the guy takes it and tilts his head back to gulp down a third of the bottle in his first go. When he's done, he looks at Chad up and down, a faint smile on his lips. "How old are you, anyway?"
Damn. This is not one of those moments in which Chad wants to be thought of as younger. He really doesn't want to have to pull his ID out now.
"Old enough," he says, but apparently, that's not cutting it, for all it gets him from the other guy is raised eyebrows and a doubtful expression. "I'm 22. And I'm being totally honest, so now you have to tell me your age, too."
"Eh." The guy shrugs, and for the first time, his eyes look a bit unsure. "About to pass the barrier of 30."
Chad couldn't really care less about that number, and he's quick to let the other guy know as he grins and takes a sip of his beer. "In my opinion, that's the best barrier you can pass in your life." Now he's just saying bullshit, really, and the guy can clearly tell and doesn't laugh this time. "So, listen. Your show was awesome, dude. And I'm not just saying that because I think you're hot," he adds with a smirk, admiring the way the other's face flushes at his words. "Really. You guys did great."
The man meets Chad's gaze and looks honest as he says, "Thanks, man. I appreciate it."
Chad grins and drinks down some more beer, feeling like he's finally getting the other to open up and maybe his mission will be successful after all.
But then the guy throws a glance over his shoulder and then looks back at Chad regretfully. "I, uh. I have to get back on stage." Shit. Or not.
"Yeah, uh." Chad's not too thrilled about losing his guy just when things were starting to look up, so he rakes his brain in search of something to say to keep the other sitting there at least one more second. "So, hey. I didn't really get your name."
His guy hesitates for a moment before he smiles. "Chris."
Chris. The name alone sends a shiver down his spine. Fuck, that can't be good. "Cool. I'm Chad."
"Yeah, so you said." Chris doesn't look too sure as to why he's hearing this information again, so Chad throws one last teasing grin at him.
"Just a reminder. You know, so you can dedicate a song to me."
And then the guy's laughing again as he walks away, throwing one glance over his shoulder as he gets on stage, and receiving an almost proud pat on the back from his band mate. He doesn't dedicate a song to Chad, but his eyes stay connected to his through almost the entire show; and when their second set is over, and Chris assures him he's not getting on again and offers to buy Chad a drink, Chad says they can get it on the way, and they leave in a rush, Chris' hand gripping Chad's wrist tightly.
#2: Chad goes looking for Jensen.
"Quit with the fucking staring and open up your fucking ears, pal, because I'm only going to say this shit once."
Jensen slowly closes the door behind him, though he regrets it the moment he sees Chad's determined, threatening face. Fuck, this day was already crappy enough without the surprise visit and probably getting beaten up by Jared's best friend.
"What - I mean, how did you get my address?"
"Jared may be too good of a guy to go through his mom's client files, but I'm not," Chad says, narrowing his eyes at Jensen. "Now, I'm going to ask you one question, and one question only, and you better give me a fucking decent answer, or things aren't going to be looking too nice. For you, that is."
Jensen continues to gape at Chad before he can pull himself together. "You - scrawny, little - you think you can just barge in here and threaten me? Who the fuck do you think you are?"
"Threaten you?" Chad frowns at Jensen, looking actually surprised. "Dude, threats won't be necessary. Not if you do things right."
Jensen's eyebrows go up. "That is a threat."
"Whatever." Chad waves him off. "Just listen. I'm here because, despite how much of an ass you've been to my boy, and despite how much I hate you right now, he seems to believe you're somewhat amazing. And I think you really care about Jared." He makes a pause. "Do you?"
Jensen is about to answer the obvious 'yes', but instead he frowns at the man standing in front of him. "Does Jared know you're here?"
"The Almighty says don't change the subject, just answer the fucking question."
"You're actually quoting Braveheart to me?"
"Just - dude, let's make this easy for both of us," Chad says. "You really care about Jared, don't you? I can see it."
Jensen allows his body to relax, and lets out a sigh. "Yeah." His voice comes out a bit shaky, and he has to clear his throat. "Yes, of course I do."
"So, if you weren't about to get fucking married, you wouldn't dump him over and over again like the asshole you are now?"
"Of course not," Jensen says, guilt creeping up on him. "I - I'm trying to make things right."
Chad nods his head once, looking satisfied. "Good. That's all I needed to know." He starts to walk to the door, then turns around and throws a glance around the room. "You, uh, might want to clean up, man."
"Huh?"
But Chad doesn't answer, he simply winks at him and closes the door behind him, leaving Jensen standing in the middle of the room, still confused.
#3: Chad and Chris at the wedding.
"Look at him. How do they even... I mean, how can he - how can anyone..."
"How can they get married without being in love?"
"I was gonna say how can they get married knowing that they've both cheated on the other, but yeah, that works, too."
He sees Chris shrug out of the corner of his eye, then an arm falls around his shoulder and pulls him close to a solid and firm chest. Chad finds himself breathing in as he always does when around Chris, but for some reason, at this moment it doesn't make him feel any better. His mind keeps going back to Jared alone at their apartment, suffering over some asshole who fucked him up just because his wife wouldn't put out. Or was it that he wanted to see if he could pull it off? Did Jensen see it as some kind of challenge, seeing if he could get some kid to be with him at the same time he was planning his wedding? Testing if Danneel found out, for future reference?
Chad looks up just in time to catch Jensen smiling down gently at Danneel in the middle of their dance, and he feels an unusual surge of violence run through him. "I want to punch his face in."
Chris' arm tightens around him. "That would make quite a scene."
"I'm serious. I just want to go over there and ruin his pretty face, then tear his balls out and shove them down his throat."
"Ouch," Chris says with a wince. He says nothing for a few seconds, then leans down to nibble at Chad's ear affectionately. "Don't. Marrying Danneel is the biggest mistake of his life, and he's gonna realize that sooner or later. And it won't be pretty."
Chad simply sighs. "I hope it's painful."
At this, Chris chuckles and pulls back from their embrace to look at Chad in the eyes. "You sure have a lot of negative energy inside you, that can't be good." He brings his lips close to Chad's in a soft kiss, then grins. "We should take all that energy and put it to good use."
A flush covers Chad's cheeks and neck. "I think our cake plan just took a whole new meaning."
"Hm, I like that. So. We ditchin'?"
"Just for a while, I want to go back to Jared tonight." Chad looks over at Jensen again, sees him standing in a corner as Danneel dances with his brother. "You think Jensen will be upset if you leave?"
Chris simply shrugs. "I hope he is. Someone's gotta teach him what it's like to be second in their lives."
His eyes meet Chad's and matching grins break out in their faces. Chris reaches out to grip Chad's wrist and tug him closer for a kiss, then pulls him in the direction of the door.
#4: Jensen and Danneel's short marriage and their divorce.
Their honeymoon is okay. Jensen figures that if he uses the word 'okay' to describe what are supposed to be the happiest days of his life then there's something clearly wrong, but he doesn't even have the strength to mention it.
They go to Acapulco for three weeks. They spend half their time there inside their hotel suite, and the other half chilling at the beach. Danneel takes a book with her every single time, and she reads it while Jensen goes for a swim, or as he falls asleep under the sun. The day she finishes her novel, she goes up to the hotel to find something else to read, gets caught up with some magazines she finds at the reception, and when she sees Jensen return four hours later, he's got an ugly sunburn and his entire skin is glaring red. That's the only night in which they go to bed without having sex; they sleep with a huge space between them, Jensen on his stomach and covered up in some cream he applies to himself in the bathroom.
When they return to the States and move into their new house in Dallas, it feels like taking a couple of steps back as far as their relationship goes. Arranging furniture and unpacking thousands of boxes isn't fun, and by the time they're done, Jensen's exhausted, and not in that good way one feels after doing something productive. He can only think about going back to Austin and to their old house - what'd been his old house before Danneel moved in. Jensen can't help but believe that, now that the pressure of getting along during their honeymoon is gone, there's nothing left to keep them together.
Danneel's words on that night before their wedding keep ringing in his mind. We owe ourselves a try, don't we?, she had asked him, her gentle fingers running through his hair and over his face, almost begging. Jensen remembers perfectly because it had been the first time they'd talked in a civil way to each other ever since she'd arrived home to find him sobbing over the loss of Jared. Except trying isn't enough anymore. She goes out with her friends, invites her parents over, convinces Jensen to have a special dinner the 8th of every month, and looks overall like she's doing fine. She insists on showing Jensen the clothes she buys after she goes shopping with the girls, and he puts his good face on and pretends he's interested.
But he isn't. He doesn't care what clothes she's bought, or what her mom thinks about their new set of curtains, or about the fucking set of curtains in the first place. Hell, he doesn't even know who the girls are - even if Danneel mentions them all the time - and he just doesn't care.
They never talk about what happened. Danneel is good at looking past it, but Jensen isn't. He looks at her, and all he sees is her in bed with someone else. He wonders if that's what she sees in him, too, him and other guy, and whether she just doesn't care enough to be bothered by it.
Because he's sure she's aware of how he spends entire nights awake, thinking about everything except her. How he stares at his phone waiting for a call he knows will never come. He knows she's seen the photo of him and Jared, now also the background of his laptop, but she hasn't said anything about it so he hasn't changed it.
He doesn't know if Danneel can sense the hole in his chest, the pain that eats him up from the inside. The few times they visit, his friends have told him he looks like shit - and he sees it too, when he looks at himself in the mirror - but Danneel seems to be the only one who can't tell how much this marriage and this whole situation is wearing Jensen out.
In the end, they last more than Jensen would've thought of.
"Dani, I think we should talk."
Danneel is busy in the kitchen attempting another of her mom's recipes. She looks up at him, sees how serious his face is, and puts everything down to give him all her attention.
"Listen, um." Jensen looks around, trying to find the right words. "I don't think I can go on with this."
Surprisingly, Danneel doesn't look shocked. Her eyes fall to Jensen's chest, then to his feet, and she nods her head slowly and silently. She pushes the hair off her face with one hand, her eyes a bit glassy.
"I know."
Jensen sighs and looks down as well. "I'm sorry."
"Me too." She sniffs, then lets out a shaky laugh, almost as if she feels she's not allowed to cry as her marriage comes to an end. "God, I just... I really wanted to make this work, you know?" A few tears make their way down her cheeks, and she wipes them away furiously. "I really thought we'd make it work," she adds in a soft voice.
Jensen doesn't think as he closes the distance between them and hugs her gently, bringing her up close to his chest. The realization of how much he cares about her despite everything, how much he doesn't want to lose her, hits him suddenly and leaves him slightly breathless.
They stand like that for a few minutes, maybe hours, in silence. Danneel stops crying eventually, but her arms don't move from around Jensen's waist. Finally, when he pulls back, she offers him a shaky smile.
"Are you going back to Austin?" she asks. It sounds like a simple question, something trivial amongst all the other things she should be worrying about, but Jensen understands what she's asking. She wants to know the reason why, and he owes her that much.
"Yeah," he says.
She nods her head again and looks away for a few seconds, then back at Jensen. "I guess this is it, then."
Jensen's chest tightens and he lets out a long breath. "Yeah."
His vision starts to blur, so he does the only thing he knows and pulls her back into his arms.
#5: Jared and Chad move out.
The first person Jared thinks of when Jensen pops the question - after his mind has recovered from the breathtaking kiss and blinding grin Jensen gives him after Jared says yes - is Chad.
It's been an exact month since the night in which Jensen showed up at Jared's exhibition and they poured their hearts out to each other like in a cheesy movie - and really, Jared hadn't even considered that until Chad points it out to him. But he's not embarrassed, not one bit, because even if it is one of his Top Five moments as far as number of tears dropped, it is, ironically, one of the happiest nights of his life, as well.
So when Jensen asks him that night over the pizza and beer that conform their impromptu anniversary dinner if he wants to move in, Jared doesn't let Jensen finish nervously listing off the reasons of why this is such a good idea and agrees. And then, he thinks of Chad.
Moving in together into an apartment of their own as soon as they finished school had been the plan since they were both 14-year-olds with no real concept of house contracts or payments or even college. But the idea had stayed steady throughout the years that had followed, and with a little help from their parents and working off their asses during three summers, they had rented an apartment and moved in their first year after graduating.
Living with Chad never was what Jared had expected in the beginning. It was less of the promised parties and alcohol, and more of having a friend who sometimes just didn't wake up in the morning for long enough to make Jared worry and call someone. It was dirty socks laying everywhere, half-eaten packages of food that were left to rot somewhere in the back of the cupboards, and Jared's clothes suddenly reappearing after a while with old, un-removable stains and letting Jared with no recollection as to when he'd lent them in the first place.
But then, it was also videogames until 3 am during weekdays, and Chad worrying enough to pick Jared up some days, sharing his food, and the little things, like making sure there was always enough beer and condoms for the both of them - even if they never got around to use the latter - and recording Jared's favorite TV shows for him while he was at work.
And when Jensen had gotten married and Jared had moped for weeks non-stop, Chad had decided to take on a second job so they could move out to a new apartment, because he wanted to give Jared a fresh start.
Jared's nervous about telling his friend. He doesn't want to leave Chad stranded, doesn't want to make Chad deal with this new apartment all by himself when they moved into it because of Jared in the first place. More than that, he doesn't want to let his friend believe he's been relegated to a second position by Jensen or that Jared cares any less for him - especially because, despite whatever Chad says, Jared's sure his friend still hasn't warmed up to Jensen entirely after everything that happened.
Because of this, Jared spends days trying to figure out how to say it, until one night, as he and Chad are sitting in the living room, both in their sweatpants and nothing else and watching a bad movie, his friend beats him to it.
"When are you gonna tell me, then?" Chad asks, not even looking away from the screen.
Jared chokes on his soda. "Tell you what?"
At this, Chad turns to look at him, his face relaxed and unchanged. "That you're moving out," he says calmly, and Jared's eyebrows shoot up his forehead. Chad chuckles. "Yeah, yeah, don't worry, I know you were thinking of a way to tell me. I just thought I'd save you all the angst."
"Oh." Jared lets out a relieved sigh, but he's still a little confused at Chad being one-hundred percent okay with this. He was expecting some little more arguing, an are you sure about this, Jay? in that soft voice Chad always uses whenever he's about to say something about Jensen and doesn't want to offend Jared. "So what, did Jensen tell Chris and he told you?"
Chad shakes his head. "No. Jensen called me to talk to me about it," Chad says, and then he grins. Jared can't remember the last time Chad grinned like that after saying Jensen's name, and it makes a warm feeling spread inside his chest. Now he understands why Chad had been so nervous the night he'd introduced Jared to Chris. "He rung up before asking you, you know," Chad goes on, ignoring Jared's surprised expression. "He wanted to see if I was okay with it, which is kinda funny. I'm not your mother."
Jared chuckles, still a bit thrown away. "Jensen called you before telling me?"
"Yeah. He's a pretty decent guy."
"Which is what I've been trying to tell you for months," Jared points out, his face stretched in a wide smile. "So what, are you okay with this?"
Chad looks at him, his expression staying serious for a second before nodding and smiling. "If you're happy, dude, then I'm more than okay with this." He rolls his eyes at himself before grabbing his own drink and taking a sip. "I might move in with Chris, you know."
Jared can't help but grin at this. "Seriously?"
"Well, yeah. I mentioned you were moving out, he asked me, and I said why not, man. I mean, it's not like I don't spend all the time over there, anyway, and he could use some help paying the rent. So could I." Chad shrugs like it's no big deal. "It works for both of us."
Jared immediately translates those last words to we're in love, so why the fuck not? inside his head, and he smiles. "That's awesome, man."
Chad turns back to the TV and scratches at his chest lazily, an absent smile on his lips before he raises the soda can to take another drink. "Yeah. It's pretty great."
The actual process of moving out of this apartment turns out to be a little harder than what they'd thought. They haven't lived here long enough to have to look under the sofa for old underwear - and seriously, Jared will never understand how Chad's boxers showed up there in their first apartment, nor does he want to - but the tough part is to determine what belongs to who. Moving to this place had only meant putting everything in common boxes, there had been no point in separating their stuff because it was going to the same location, anyway.
Now, though, they have to go through an entire pile of jeans and undershirts and socks that have once belonged to either one of them, but were later used enough by the other to blur the lines of possession. In the end, Chad agrees to Jared taking the black pair of jeans as long as he gets to keep the new version of Halo, which he insists he has total right over since Jared's taking their PS2 to Jensen's - only a consequence of Chris already having his own. They evenly split their DVD collection - Chad even makes an approximate chart with how many explosions and deaths each movie has so that the deal is completely fair for both of them - and they spend their last night, on Chad's insistence, trying to eat all of the food left in the fridge.
"You know I'll only be, like, twenty minutes away, right?" Chad speaks up out of nowhere, his mouth stuffed with cheese. "So you have no excuse."
Jared looks at him with a smile. "I don't need one, dude," he replies. "Me and Jensen will be over at your guys' place so much that you'll be sick of us and kick us out."
"No, but seriously," Chad goes on, his face impassive. "We should at least agree on seeing each other once a week. And we can go on from that. I still want to beat your ass at whatever game we play."
Jared gives Chad a small smile and nods. "Agreed, dude. Though I gotta tell you, you'll be seeing me more than once a week."
"I won't be complaining," Chad answers, and then, after a second, catches up with what he said and frowns at himself. "Much," he adds, and Jared laughs. "It's weird, man," Chad goes on before Jared can say anything. "We've owned this place for a little over a year. It was a good place, dude, I'm kinda sad to be leaving it."
Jared looks around, his fingers tracing the rim of the bottle in his hands, and thinks of all the memories this place holds - all the nights he spent locked up in his own bedroom, all the talks he and Chad had in the living room, the times Chad caught Jared just tearing up over his coffee in this very same kitchen and had dropped everything to give him a hug.
"I'm not sad," Jared finally says after a while.
Chad catches up to what he means and nods in agreement, then picks up the carton of apple juice next to him and tips it towards Jared. "To our new lives, man," he says.
Jared grins and knocks his bottle against Chad's, then they both tilt their heads back and drink.
Masterpost | Previous
Author: gluckspirat
Artist: loverstar
Fandom: CW RPF
Genre: Slash, AU.
Pairing: Jensen Ackles/Jared Padalecki
Rating: R
Disclaimer: The following story is fiction and it never happened. I don't know nor own the characters.
Word count: 39,975
Summary: Jared's life finally seems to be on track: he's living with his friend Chad, studying what he loves, and now that he's working for his mother, he can afford both things. Even the introduction of Jensen Ackles to the picture doesn't appear to shake things up much - he's charming and hot and funny, and Jared feels an instant attraction, but it's just another crush on a straight guy and Jared's positive he'll get over it. That is, until Jensen starts flirting back and sending Jared mixed signs - which would be great, really, if it wasn't for the tiny little fact that Jensen's getting married, and that he's chosen Jared's mom's catering business to serve at his wedding.
#1: Chad first meets Chris.
The bar is completely packed and all Chad can smell is the sweat and alcohol coming out of other people's bodies. He's lost Zach and Milo into the crowd a while ago when they left with those girls who certainly didn't look legal in Chad's eyes, but really, he couldn't care less at the moment.
He's heading straight towards a guy sitting at the bar, both forearms placed over the wooden surface, long hair falling over his broad shoulders. The guy's just gotten off the stage and Chad swears he can see the skin on his neck glistening in the sexiest way.
"Hey," he plasters a grin on his face, and slides into the empty stool next to the guy. "Great show, man."
The guy looks at him, his face unreadable. "Thanks."
"Seriously, you were awesome." Chad's been known for sucking up to people every now and then, little white lies that get him where he wants to be - which is generally inside the other person's pants - but this time, he's being honest. This guy and the other one, he thinks the band was called Kane or something close, really rocked, and though their music wasn't what Chad usually listens to, he found himself nodding his head to the beat and wanting more after their set was over. And this guy has clearly heard how good he is way too many times, as the only thing he does is smile at Chad for a brief second before looking away. "I'm Chad." Again, nothing but a smile. Chad raises his eyebrows slightly. "And you're...?"
Finally, the guy meets his gaze for more than a second and shows him a crooked grin. "Too old for you."
Chad shakes his head with a snort and ignores his words - just as he ignores the way his stomach turns a little at the other man's smile. "Can I buy you a beer, then?"
The guy lets out a low chuckle. "Cute," he says, and then he stands up and leaves.
Huh. Well. That's new. Chad's not too used to being let down, but he's not one to give up, either. Especially when this guy is so hot, and has a killer smile that's making Chad's body react in ways it never has before.
So he calls the bartender over, a woman who squints at him as if wondering if Chad's of age, and he asks for two beers. He makes sure his voice sounds weak and unsure enough just hoping she'll ask to see his ID - hell, after years of trying to look old, now he's dying to pull it out every chance he has just to show it off - but she simply nods her head and brings him the two drinks.
Chad pays and then quickly looks around, his eyes searching the crowd while looking for his guy. He catches a few flirtatious girls batting their eyelashes at him, but he feels like he's on a mission now, and he's not backing out, so he ignores them.
Finally, he spots him at the other end of the bar, alone. Chad can barely hold back his smirk. Oh, please. He practically has a sign saying 'come hit on me! I'm free!', he thinks. So he goes to do exactly that.
"What're you doing?" The guy asks as Chad sits next to him again, holding one beer in each hand, but the frown on his face is more amused than pissed off.
Chad grins. "Oh, nothing. I bought one beer and the bartender gave me this one for free. I think she has a crush on me or something."
The man laughs, his entire face lightning up and losing the few threatening signs that were still showing. Chad falls in love with the sound instantly - and no, that's not too girly, sounds are cool and manly and it's not like he's falling over the dude's hair. Which, by the way, is pretty awesome, too.
"Yeah, especially 'cause her husband is right over there." The guy nods his head at somewhere over Chad's shoulder, but he's really not interested in seeing the bartender's man, so his eyes don't move from the other's face.
"Yeah, well. Many women make the mistake of getting married before meeting me." He throws in a smirk after his words just so the guy knows he's just kidding, and for that he gets another laugh. "So, uh. I guess I'll just leave this here," he says, placing one drink over the bar, "and maybe someone will want it."
Finally, finally, the guy takes it and tilts his head back to gulp down a third of the bottle in his first go. When he's done, he looks at Chad up and down, a faint smile on his lips. "How old are you, anyway?"
Damn. This is not one of those moments in which Chad wants to be thought of as younger. He really doesn't want to have to pull his ID out now.
"Old enough," he says, but apparently, that's not cutting it, for all it gets him from the other guy is raised eyebrows and a doubtful expression. "I'm 22. And I'm being totally honest, so now you have to tell me your age, too."
"Eh." The guy shrugs, and for the first time, his eyes look a bit unsure. "About to pass the barrier of 30."
Chad couldn't really care less about that number, and he's quick to let the other guy know as he grins and takes a sip of his beer. "In my opinion, that's the best barrier you can pass in your life." Now he's just saying bullshit, really, and the guy can clearly tell and doesn't laugh this time. "So, listen. Your show was awesome, dude. And I'm not just saying that because I think you're hot," he adds with a smirk, admiring the way the other's face flushes at his words. "Really. You guys did great."
The man meets Chad's gaze and looks honest as he says, "Thanks, man. I appreciate it."
Chad grins and drinks down some more beer, feeling like he's finally getting the other to open up and maybe his mission will be successful after all.
But then the guy throws a glance over his shoulder and then looks back at Chad regretfully. "I, uh. I have to get back on stage." Shit. Or not.
"Yeah, uh." Chad's not too thrilled about losing his guy just when things were starting to look up, so he rakes his brain in search of something to say to keep the other sitting there at least one more second. "So, hey. I didn't really get your name."
His guy hesitates for a moment before he smiles. "Chris."
Chris. The name alone sends a shiver down his spine. Fuck, that can't be good. "Cool. I'm Chad."
"Yeah, so you said." Chris doesn't look too sure as to why he's hearing this information again, so Chad throws one last teasing grin at him.
"Just a reminder. You know, so you can dedicate a song to me."
And then the guy's laughing again as he walks away, throwing one glance over his shoulder as he gets on stage, and receiving an almost proud pat on the back from his band mate. He doesn't dedicate a song to Chad, but his eyes stay connected to his through almost the entire show; and when their second set is over, and Chris assures him he's not getting on again and offers to buy Chad a drink, Chad says they can get it on the way, and they leave in a rush, Chris' hand gripping Chad's wrist tightly.
#2: Chad goes looking for Jensen.
"Quit with the fucking staring and open up your fucking ears, pal, because I'm only going to say this shit once."
Jensen slowly closes the door behind him, though he regrets it the moment he sees Chad's determined, threatening face. Fuck, this day was already crappy enough without the surprise visit and probably getting beaten up by Jared's best friend.
"What - I mean, how did you get my address?"
"Jared may be too good of a guy to go through his mom's client files, but I'm not," Chad says, narrowing his eyes at Jensen. "Now, I'm going to ask you one question, and one question only, and you better give me a fucking decent answer, or things aren't going to be looking too nice. For you, that is."
Jensen continues to gape at Chad before he can pull himself together. "You - scrawny, little - you think you can just barge in here and threaten me? Who the fuck do you think you are?"
"Threaten you?" Chad frowns at Jensen, looking actually surprised. "Dude, threats won't be necessary. Not if you do things right."
Jensen's eyebrows go up. "That is a threat."
"Whatever." Chad waves him off. "Just listen. I'm here because, despite how much of an ass you've been to my boy, and despite how much I hate you right now, he seems to believe you're somewhat amazing. And I think you really care about Jared." He makes a pause. "Do you?"
Jensen is about to answer the obvious 'yes', but instead he frowns at the man standing in front of him. "Does Jared know you're here?"
"The Almighty says don't change the subject, just answer the fucking question."
"You're actually quoting Braveheart to me?"
"Just - dude, let's make this easy for both of us," Chad says. "You really care about Jared, don't you? I can see it."
Jensen allows his body to relax, and lets out a sigh. "Yeah." His voice comes out a bit shaky, and he has to clear his throat. "Yes, of course I do."
"So, if you weren't about to get fucking married, you wouldn't dump him over and over again like the asshole you are now?"
"Of course not," Jensen says, guilt creeping up on him. "I - I'm trying to make things right."
Chad nods his head once, looking satisfied. "Good. That's all I needed to know." He starts to walk to the door, then turns around and throws a glance around the room. "You, uh, might want to clean up, man."
"Huh?"
But Chad doesn't answer, he simply winks at him and closes the door behind him, leaving Jensen standing in the middle of the room, still confused.
#3: Chad and Chris at the wedding.
"Look at him. How do they even... I mean, how can he - how can anyone..."
"How can they get married without being in love?"
"I was gonna say how can they get married knowing that they've both cheated on the other, but yeah, that works, too."
He sees Chris shrug out of the corner of his eye, then an arm falls around his shoulder and pulls him close to a solid and firm chest. Chad finds himself breathing in as he always does when around Chris, but for some reason, at this moment it doesn't make him feel any better. His mind keeps going back to Jared alone at their apartment, suffering over some asshole who fucked him up just because his wife wouldn't put out. Or was it that he wanted to see if he could pull it off? Did Jensen see it as some kind of challenge, seeing if he could get some kid to be with him at the same time he was planning his wedding? Testing if Danneel found out, for future reference?
Chad looks up just in time to catch Jensen smiling down gently at Danneel in the middle of their dance, and he feels an unusual surge of violence run through him. "I want to punch his face in."
Chris' arm tightens around him. "That would make quite a scene."
"I'm serious. I just want to go over there and ruin his pretty face, then tear his balls out and shove them down his throat."
"Ouch," Chris says with a wince. He says nothing for a few seconds, then leans down to nibble at Chad's ear affectionately. "Don't. Marrying Danneel is the biggest mistake of his life, and he's gonna realize that sooner or later. And it won't be pretty."
Chad simply sighs. "I hope it's painful."
At this, Chris chuckles and pulls back from their embrace to look at Chad in the eyes. "You sure have a lot of negative energy inside you, that can't be good." He brings his lips close to Chad's in a soft kiss, then grins. "We should take all that energy and put it to good use."
A flush covers Chad's cheeks and neck. "I think our cake plan just took a whole new meaning."
"Hm, I like that. So. We ditchin'?"
"Just for a while, I want to go back to Jared tonight." Chad looks over at Jensen again, sees him standing in a corner as Danneel dances with his brother. "You think Jensen will be upset if you leave?"
Chris simply shrugs. "I hope he is. Someone's gotta teach him what it's like to be second in their lives."
His eyes meet Chad's and matching grins break out in their faces. Chris reaches out to grip Chad's wrist and tug him closer for a kiss, then pulls him in the direction of the door.
#4: Jensen and Danneel's short marriage and their divorce.
Their honeymoon is okay. Jensen figures that if he uses the word 'okay' to describe what are supposed to be the happiest days of his life then there's something clearly wrong, but he doesn't even have the strength to mention it.
They go to Acapulco for three weeks. They spend half their time there inside their hotel suite, and the other half chilling at the beach. Danneel takes a book with her every single time, and she reads it while Jensen goes for a swim, or as he falls asleep under the sun. The day she finishes her novel, she goes up to the hotel to find something else to read, gets caught up with some magazines she finds at the reception, and when she sees Jensen return four hours later, he's got an ugly sunburn and his entire skin is glaring red. That's the only night in which they go to bed without having sex; they sleep with a huge space between them, Jensen on his stomach and covered up in some cream he applies to himself in the bathroom.
When they return to the States and move into their new house in Dallas, it feels like taking a couple of steps back as far as their relationship goes. Arranging furniture and unpacking thousands of boxes isn't fun, and by the time they're done, Jensen's exhausted, and not in that good way one feels after doing something productive. He can only think about going back to Austin and to their old house - what'd been his old house before Danneel moved in. Jensen can't help but believe that, now that the pressure of getting along during their honeymoon is gone, there's nothing left to keep them together.
Danneel's words on that night before their wedding keep ringing in his mind. We owe ourselves a try, don't we?, she had asked him, her gentle fingers running through his hair and over his face, almost begging. Jensen remembers perfectly because it had been the first time they'd talked in a civil way to each other ever since she'd arrived home to find him sobbing over the loss of Jared. Except trying isn't enough anymore. She goes out with her friends, invites her parents over, convinces Jensen to have a special dinner the 8th of every month, and looks overall like she's doing fine. She insists on showing Jensen the clothes she buys after she goes shopping with the girls, and he puts his good face on and pretends he's interested.
But he isn't. He doesn't care what clothes she's bought, or what her mom thinks about their new set of curtains, or about the fucking set of curtains in the first place. Hell, he doesn't even know who the girls are - even if Danneel mentions them all the time - and he just doesn't care.
They never talk about what happened. Danneel is good at looking past it, but Jensen isn't. He looks at her, and all he sees is her in bed with someone else. He wonders if that's what she sees in him, too, him and other guy, and whether she just doesn't care enough to be bothered by it.
Because he's sure she's aware of how he spends entire nights awake, thinking about everything except her. How he stares at his phone waiting for a call he knows will never come. He knows she's seen the photo of him and Jared, now also the background of his laptop, but she hasn't said anything about it so he hasn't changed it.
He doesn't know if Danneel can sense the hole in his chest, the pain that eats him up from the inside. The few times they visit, his friends have told him he looks like shit - and he sees it too, when he looks at himself in the mirror - but Danneel seems to be the only one who can't tell how much this marriage and this whole situation is wearing Jensen out.
In the end, they last more than Jensen would've thought of.
"Dani, I think we should talk."
Danneel is busy in the kitchen attempting another of her mom's recipes. She looks up at him, sees how serious his face is, and puts everything down to give him all her attention.
"Listen, um." Jensen looks around, trying to find the right words. "I don't think I can go on with this."
Surprisingly, Danneel doesn't look shocked. Her eyes fall to Jensen's chest, then to his feet, and she nods her head slowly and silently. She pushes the hair off her face with one hand, her eyes a bit glassy.
"I know."
Jensen sighs and looks down as well. "I'm sorry."
"Me too." She sniffs, then lets out a shaky laugh, almost as if she feels she's not allowed to cry as her marriage comes to an end. "God, I just... I really wanted to make this work, you know?" A few tears make their way down her cheeks, and she wipes them away furiously. "I really thought we'd make it work," she adds in a soft voice.
Jensen doesn't think as he closes the distance between them and hugs her gently, bringing her up close to his chest. The realization of how much he cares about her despite everything, how much he doesn't want to lose her, hits him suddenly and leaves him slightly breathless.
They stand like that for a few minutes, maybe hours, in silence. Danneel stops crying eventually, but her arms don't move from around Jensen's waist. Finally, when he pulls back, she offers him a shaky smile.
"Are you going back to Austin?" she asks. It sounds like a simple question, something trivial amongst all the other things she should be worrying about, but Jensen understands what she's asking. She wants to know the reason why, and he owes her that much.
"Yeah," he says.
She nods her head again and looks away for a few seconds, then back at Jensen. "I guess this is it, then."
Jensen's chest tightens and he lets out a long breath. "Yeah."
His vision starts to blur, so he does the only thing he knows and pulls her back into his arms.
#5: Jared and Chad move out.
The first person Jared thinks of when Jensen pops the question - after his mind has recovered from the breathtaking kiss and blinding grin Jensen gives him after Jared says yes - is Chad.
It's been an exact month since the night in which Jensen showed up at Jared's exhibition and they poured their hearts out to each other like in a cheesy movie - and really, Jared hadn't even considered that until Chad points it out to him. But he's not embarrassed, not one bit, because even if it is one of his Top Five moments as far as number of tears dropped, it is, ironically, one of the happiest nights of his life, as well.
So when Jensen asks him that night over the pizza and beer that conform their impromptu anniversary dinner if he wants to move in, Jared doesn't let Jensen finish nervously listing off the reasons of why this is such a good idea and agrees. And then, he thinks of Chad.
Moving in together into an apartment of their own as soon as they finished school had been the plan since they were both 14-year-olds with no real concept of house contracts or payments or even college. But the idea had stayed steady throughout the years that had followed, and with a little help from their parents and working off their asses during three summers, they had rented an apartment and moved in their first year after graduating.
Living with Chad never was what Jared had expected in the beginning. It was less of the promised parties and alcohol, and more of having a friend who sometimes just didn't wake up in the morning for long enough to make Jared worry and call someone. It was dirty socks laying everywhere, half-eaten packages of food that were left to rot somewhere in the back of the cupboards, and Jared's clothes suddenly reappearing after a while with old, un-removable stains and letting Jared with no recollection as to when he'd lent them in the first place.
But then, it was also videogames until 3 am during weekdays, and Chad worrying enough to pick Jared up some days, sharing his food, and the little things, like making sure there was always enough beer and condoms for the both of them - even if they never got around to use the latter - and recording Jared's favorite TV shows for him while he was at work.
And when Jensen had gotten married and Jared had moped for weeks non-stop, Chad had decided to take on a second job so they could move out to a new apartment, because he wanted to give Jared a fresh start.
Jared's nervous about telling his friend. He doesn't want to leave Chad stranded, doesn't want to make Chad deal with this new apartment all by himself when they moved into it because of Jared in the first place. More than that, he doesn't want to let his friend believe he's been relegated to a second position by Jensen or that Jared cares any less for him - especially because, despite whatever Chad says, Jared's sure his friend still hasn't warmed up to Jensen entirely after everything that happened.
Because of this, Jared spends days trying to figure out how to say it, until one night, as he and Chad are sitting in the living room, both in their sweatpants and nothing else and watching a bad movie, his friend beats him to it.
"When are you gonna tell me, then?" Chad asks, not even looking away from the screen.
Jared chokes on his soda. "Tell you what?"
At this, Chad turns to look at him, his face relaxed and unchanged. "That you're moving out," he says calmly, and Jared's eyebrows shoot up his forehead. Chad chuckles. "Yeah, yeah, don't worry, I know you were thinking of a way to tell me. I just thought I'd save you all the angst."
"Oh." Jared lets out a relieved sigh, but he's still a little confused at Chad being one-hundred percent okay with this. He was expecting some little more arguing, an are you sure about this, Jay? in that soft voice Chad always uses whenever he's about to say something about Jensen and doesn't want to offend Jared. "So what, did Jensen tell Chris and he told you?"
Chad shakes his head. "No. Jensen called me to talk to me about it," Chad says, and then he grins. Jared can't remember the last time Chad grinned like that after saying Jensen's name, and it makes a warm feeling spread inside his chest. Now he understands why Chad had been so nervous the night he'd introduced Jared to Chris. "He rung up before asking you, you know," Chad goes on, ignoring Jared's surprised expression. "He wanted to see if I was okay with it, which is kinda funny. I'm not your mother."
Jared chuckles, still a bit thrown away. "Jensen called you before telling me?"
"Yeah. He's a pretty decent guy."
"Which is what I've been trying to tell you for months," Jared points out, his face stretched in a wide smile. "So what, are you okay with this?"
Chad looks at him, his expression staying serious for a second before nodding and smiling. "If you're happy, dude, then I'm more than okay with this." He rolls his eyes at himself before grabbing his own drink and taking a sip. "I might move in with Chris, you know."
Jared can't help but grin at this. "Seriously?"
"Well, yeah. I mentioned you were moving out, he asked me, and I said why not, man. I mean, it's not like I don't spend all the time over there, anyway, and he could use some help paying the rent. So could I." Chad shrugs like it's no big deal. "It works for both of us."
Jared immediately translates those last words to we're in love, so why the fuck not? inside his head, and he smiles. "That's awesome, man."
Chad turns back to the TV and scratches at his chest lazily, an absent smile on his lips before he raises the soda can to take another drink. "Yeah. It's pretty great."
The actual process of moving out of this apartment turns out to be a little harder than what they'd thought. They haven't lived here long enough to have to look under the sofa for old underwear - and seriously, Jared will never understand how Chad's boxers showed up there in their first apartment, nor does he want to - but the tough part is to determine what belongs to who. Moving to this place had only meant putting everything in common boxes, there had been no point in separating their stuff because it was going to the same location, anyway.
Now, though, they have to go through an entire pile of jeans and undershirts and socks that have once belonged to either one of them, but were later used enough by the other to blur the lines of possession. In the end, Chad agrees to Jared taking the black pair of jeans as long as he gets to keep the new version of Halo, which he insists he has total right over since Jared's taking their PS2 to Jensen's - only a consequence of Chris already having his own. They evenly split their DVD collection - Chad even makes an approximate chart with how many explosions and deaths each movie has so that the deal is completely fair for both of them - and they spend their last night, on Chad's insistence, trying to eat all of the food left in the fridge.
"You know I'll only be, like, twenty minutes away, right?" Chad speaks up out of nowhere, his mouth stuffed with cheese. "So you have no excuse."
Jared looks at him with a smile. "I don't need one, dude," he replies. "Me and Jensen will be over at your guys' place so much that you'll be sick of us and kick us out."
"No, but seriously," Chad goes on, his face impassive. "We should at least agree on seeing each other once a week. And we can go on from that. I still want to beat your ass at whatever game we play."
Jared gives Chad a small smile and nods. "Agreed, dude. Though I gotta tell you, you'll be seeing me more than once a week."
"I won't be complaining," Chad answers, and then, after a second, catches up with what he said and frowns at himself. "Much," he adds, and Jared laughs. "It's weird, man," Chad goes on before Jared can say anything. "We've owned this place for a little over a year. It was a good place, dude, I'm kinda sad to be leaving it."
Jared looks around, his fingers tracing the rim of the bottle in his hands, and thinks of all the memories this place holds - all the nights he spent locked up in his own bedroom, all the talks he and Chad had in the living room, the times Chad caught Jared just tearing up over his coffee in this very same kitchen and had dropped everything to give him a hug.
"I'm not sad," Jared finally says after a while.
Chad catches up to what he means and nods in agreement, then picks up the carton of apple juice next to him and tips it towards Jared. "To our new lives, man," he says.
Jared grins and knocks his bottle against Chad's, then they both tilt their heads back and drink.
Masterpost | Previous