[original] i dreamed about ray charles last night & he could see just fine.
part of li's prompt; Four ordinary children visit a magical world. They go home. Three of the children forget about the magical world; the other one has spent his/her life looking for a doorway back into that world.
The trucks pass the doorstep every so often. They make a mess of noise, chugchugchugging away on that diesel, a black stream of exhaust floating behind it, like a bride walking down that aisle in off-white.
Elena and Oscar sit on the steps, looking past the blushing brides to the smiling sunset of the West.
-No hay nada como el créspulo de Arizona -Oscar comments casually. Nothing he says is ever casual, but Elena isn't in the mood for calculating intent.
Elena agrees, in a soft voice. Her eyes remain locked onto the horizon. There definitely hadn't been anything like it in Jackson or at Princeton. Every day that ball of gas disappeared in pale oranges and light pinks behind grey and brown buildings, like a tongue disappearing behind so many teeth.
-Elena.
She faced her brother, his earnest expression, honestly, was rather worrying.
-What're we doing? -he asks her, his voice soft and pleading, strange and confused. He was never lost, never thrown for a loop.
-Where? Here?
-Anywhere -he replied, shrugging.
And for the first time she allowed herself to really think about it. They'd moved on before and it hadn't been a problem. They needed enough money to repair the car, or someone was in need of bedrest and medication. Necessities, health and the freedom of movement.
But there was nothing anchoring them here, now. Nothing but this wild flutter in her chest, this necessity for some sense of stability and anything which resembled warmth.
And she'd been giving them, and herself, excuses all summer. But now it was almost fall, and it had come, the moment where she'd make herself drop the veils.
-I think I've found...met someone. Brinn's sister, the one...
Recognition lit his face with the green glow of the traffic light. He nodded slowly, silently asking her to go on, explain further. Oscar was always the quiet one, the one who gathered information with this silence, and always understood the best way to string together his understanding into eloquence. It was almost enough to make one fear to speak with him, for fear he'd understand their own mind better.
But at the same time, this could be a relief from the pressure of figuring out your own desires and fears.
-I mean, she's interested and I'm...interested, if that's the word for it, I don't know. But i can't start anything without knowing if...
-What's she like?
-She reminds me of...people. Very solid, a very strong presence. And, oh god, she can be sweet. So sweet. She doesn't come off that way, but she is willing to do a lot for someone if she cares enough, even if it is reluctantly.
-And she's pretty?
-Oh. I suppose. Yes, she's very attractive, who am I fooling? My type.
-Huh. Big girl? -He had a small smile growing from the side of his lip, a knowing leer in the works, and it immediately began to grate her nerves. She paused, suddenly feeling a great fool for not having realized what he had really been trying to get at. She stood up, glaring and dusting off her behind, brushing away bits of brick and concrete.
-She's not Ismene, if that's what you're trying to imply -she told him, the volume of her voice rising exponentially.
He didn't move to follow her, remaining in his spot on the stairs, and instead turned his head to look instead out toward the sunset, which was fading quickly now, with most of the sky already covered by a heavy blanket of night.
-It sounds a lot like her -Elena immediately opened her mouth to spit out a furious retort, but he put up his hand, and she allowed herself to be cut off out of habit. -No, sh. Listen to me for a second, alright? I'm not saying it's a bad thing, okay? Alejandro will think it's terrible, but ignore him. He doesn't know much beyond...well, beyond the actions of things. It's cruel to say he doesn't get emotions, but that's kind of true.
-You don't know much either.
-Right. Sh. I do know it won't last, María Elena. No va a durar, como lo que tuviste con Ismena no duro. Fue algo que quemo muy fuerte y con mucha pasión, pero eso no hace que las cosas duren años, niña. Te vas a tener que ir, como te fuiste de Jackson. No tiene que ser justo ahora, pero va a sucededir.
Elena sat down next to her brother once more, her face blank and vulnerable. She had taken in his every word and absorbed it as truth. She let her gaze fall one last time on the vanishing sun, eyes burning lightly.
-I left trying to start over, you know? I was trying to leave what baggage I could abandon back there because I didn't want to become one of those people whose ghosts reflect back at you through their sleep-deprived eyes. I wanted...needed, to be free of that future. Clean slate, and all those stupid lies you tell yourself to not throw yourself underneath the train.
Oscar moved his hand as if to let it fall on Elena's shoulder, but instead he let it drop onto his own leg, and said nothing.
-Ever since we left, I feel like instead of moving forward I'm groping around desperately for a doorway back there. Not just back to Jackson, but back to Ismene and Mamá, which is what makes it so ridiculous. I know I can't go back there, it's impossible...and yet... -Her voice cracked dangerously, and she let her chin fall onto her palms, elbows resting on her knees.
-Is this girl a doorway, then?
Elena sighed deeply, and the sun faded away completely, the stars glittering like dangerous dagger tips in the nighttime sky.
-No. She's a broken window.
The trucks pass the doorstep every so often. They make a mess of noise, chugchugchugging away on that diesel, a black stream of exhaust floating behind it, like a bride walking down that aisle in off-white.
Elena and Oscar sit on the steps, looking past the blushing brides to the smiling sunset of the West.
-No hay nada como el créspulo de Arizona -Oscar comments casually. Nothing he says is ever casual, but Elena isn't in the mood for calculating intent.
Elena agrees, in a soft voice. Her eyes remain locked onto the horizon. There definitely hadn't been anything like it in Jackson or at Princeton. Every day that ball of gas disappeared in pale oranges and light pinks behind grey and brown buildings, like a tongue disappearing behind so many teeth.
-Elena.
She faced her brother, his earnest expression, honestly, was rather worrying.
-What're we doing? -he asks her, his voice soft and pleading, strange and confused. He was never lost, never thrown for a loop.
-Where? Here?
-Anywhere -he replied, shrugging.
And for the first time she allowed herself to really think about it. They'd moved on before and it hadn't been a problem. They needed enough money to repair the car, or someone was in need of bedrest and medication. Necessities, health and the freedom of movement.
But there was nothing anchoring them here, now. Nothing but this wild flutter in her chest, this necessity for some sense of stability and anything which resembled warmth.
And she'd been giving them, and herself, excuses all summer. But now it was almost fall, and it had come, the moment where she'd make herself drop the veils.
-I think I've found...met someone. Brinn's sister, the one...
Recognition lit his face with the green glow of the traffic light. He nodded slowly, silently asking her to go on, explain further. Oscar was always the quiet one, the one who gathered information with this silence, and always understood the best way to string together his understanding into eloquence. It was almost enough to make one fear to speak with him, for fear he'd understand their own mind better.
But at the same time, this could be a relief from the pressure of figuring out your own desires and fears.
-I mean, she's interested and I'm...interested, if that's the word for it, I don't know. But i can't start anything without knowing if...
-What's she like?
-She reminds me of...people. Very solid, a very strong presence. And, oh god, she can be sweet. So sweet. She doesn't come off that way, but she is willing to do a lot for someone if she cares enough, even if it is reluctantly.
-And she's pretty?
-Oh. I suppose. Yes, she's very attractive, who am I fooling? My type.
-Huh. Big girl? -He had a small smile growing from the side of his lip, a knowing leer in the works, and it immediately began to grate her nerves. She paused, suddenly feeling a great fool for not having realized what he had really been trying to get at. She stood up, glaring and dusting off her behind, brushing away bits of brick and concrete.
-She's not Ismene, if that's what you're trying to imply -she told him, the volume of her voice rising exponentially.
He didn't move to follow her, remaining in his spot on the stairs, and instead turned his head to look instead out toward the sunset, which was fading quickly now, with most of the sky already covered by a heavy blanket of night.
-It sounds a lot like her -Elena immediately opened her mouth to spit out a furious retort, but he put up his hand, and she allowed herself to be cut off out of habit. -No, sh. Listen to me for a second, alright? I'm not saying it's a bad thing, okay? Alejandro will think it's terrible, but ignore him. He doesn't know much beyond...well, beyond the actions of things. It's cruel to say he doesn't get emotions, but that's kind of true.
-You don't know much either.
-Right. Sh. I do know it won't last, María Elena. No va a durar, como lo que tuviste con Ismena no duro. Fue algo que quemo muy fuerte y con mucha pasión, pero eso no hace que las cosas duren años, niña. Te vas a tener que ir, como te fuiste de Jackson. No tiene que ser justo ahora, pero va a sucededir.
Elena sat down next to her brother once more, her face blank and vulnerable. She had taken in his every word and absorbed it as truth. She let her gaze fall one last time on the vanishing sun, eyes burning lightly.
-I left trying to start over, you know? I was trying to leave what baggage I could abandon back there because I didn't want to become one of those people whose ghosts reflect back at you through their sleep-deprived eyes. I wanted...needed, to be free of that future. Clean slate, and all those stupid lies you tell yourself to not throw yourself underneath the train.
Oscar moved his hand as if to let it fall on Elena's shoulder, but instead he let it drop onto his own leg, and said nothing.
-Ever since we left, I feel like instead of moving forward I'm groping around desperately for a doorway back there. Not just back to Jackson, but back to Ismene and Mamá, which is what makes it so ridiculous. I know I can't go back there, it's impossible...and yet... -Her voice cracked dangerously, and she let her chin fall onto her palms, elbows resting on her knees.
-Is this girl a doorway, then?
Elena sighed deeply, and the sun faded away completely, the stars glittering like dangerous dagger tips in the nighttime sky.
-No. She's a broken window.