If our ends are unjustifiable, why worry ourselves about the means?
Here is the first chapter of an original story that I'm pretty excited about. Read it, you'll like it. X-posted everywhere.
The Pursuit of Grandeur
Pilot Chapter - The Fool
The end of the world was appealing to a lot of people. That was one of the things that Mr. Michael Stubs the Coordinating Assistant Editor of the New York office was most surprised to learn when he first started talking to the strange gentleman. Surely, he thought, if there were such people (other such people, he had begun to correct himself) they would be ashamed at their inability to be satisfied with existence, and would keep their heads down. And yet here were four standing beyond the frame of the doorway in the unassuming room on the 17th floor of the stately New York City lodge. He had just enough time to think that they didn't seem to be particularly outstanding people when the lean man hurried him into the room, frowning and clearly ruffled. Beyond the doorway, the gentleman was sitting comfortably in an uncomfortable looking armchair, ruffling a young woman's hair affectionately while she smiled up at him from the bed beside the chair. A woman examined Stubbs from the other side of the double bed, her brow furrowed in worry lines that seemed to be the natural state of her face. The lean man with the hooked nose, in contrast, did not look at Stubbs's and seemed preoccupied with locking the room.
After the door closed behind him, the occupants of the room stood in stark silence. It took Stubs a moment to realize the reason for the tension, and a pang of guilt struck him as he remembered his wife, forgotten in all his excitement. He turned to look at her, now awkward and hoping she could give him some idea of what to say. She was no help, and simply looked at him with the stern expression that only a wife can convey. Failing her, Stubbs turned to his gentleman, who was sitting contentedly in the simple cloth armchair, with a look of bemused curiosity on his face. He leaned forward to address Stubbs directly.
"Who is she, Stubbs?"
"She's, well she's my wife, sir."
"Were my instructions clear that you were to be accompanied by no one?"
"Yes, they were. But, sir, you must understand, she refused to stay, I couldn't force her to…" The gentleman frowned.
"Stubbs," he interrupted, "I have explained to you our purpose. I have also explained to you our requirements. In order to join us, you would have to leave everything behind. To all family, friends, employers, you must be dead and gone. There was no need to explain anything to her." He paused to push his glasses back against his face. "The question is Stubbs, if you were unable to come here without her, can we expect you fight, kill or die with her? How are we to be certain that you will put anything of importance over her preferences?"
"May I have a word here?" Cut in Stubbs' wife, curtly.
"As many as you like." answered their host, pleasantly. This response was perhaps a bit unexpected, as it took the woman a moment to think of something to say.
"What do you want with my husband?"
"My dear Mrs. Stubbs! You make it sound as though we have kidnapped him!
"You've clearly done something terrible to Micheal, brainwashing or the like. It's a subtle kidnapping. You seem to be the leader of this damned cult, and I have no doubt that you are a master of the ways to subvert a man's mind until you have his psyche dependent on your empty words.” This made the man laughed.
“If that's the case, I'm not much of a master, am I? In fact, I would seem to have failed miserably.” Their was an edge on the voice, and Stubbs had no doubt that is was not the gentleman's own failure of which he was speaking.
"I don't know why, I just had to bring her, sir. I just..."
"But I know why you brought her, Stubbs. It's very clear why you brought her. You brought her because you were unsure of yourself. You were about to cast off the experiences of you entire life, to let go of all the basic rules. You brought her as a lifeline. It's really quite understandable, it would be too much for you to do it all at once, and all on you're own. Which is, of course, why it will be so very effective for you when we convert her to our point of view." The gentleman seemed inexcusably smug.
"When you what?" asked his wife with righteous indignation. Eyebrows raised around the room. The young woman sitting on the bed laughed out loud and Ms. Stubbs shot her a contemptuous look. "I not only think it ridiculous that you believe that I could become a part of this laughable little 'movement,” she curtly informed the gentleman "I think it ridiculous that you are so incorrectly certain that I am going to stay in this room to hear your arguments. My husband and I are getting out of this place now. We are going to get into the car, and we are going to drive home, and we are going to get some sleep, and then we are going to get our heads back together."
"Well, that is most unfortunate, Mr. Stubbs. The organization will be sad to see you go." The gentleman leaned back. Perhaps taking this as consent, the unfortunate wife turned back to Micheal. He looked very small considering that he was not a small man.
“You see all this, Micheal? Take a good look. There is no miracle here, there is no God here, there is no answer here waiting for you with outstretched arms. These people are crazy, demented, and they don't need you to continue their little delusion.” She unlocked the door and motioned to her husband commandingly. “Come with me, Micheal, we're leaving now.” He didn't move. “I said now, Micheal, we're leaving now, Michael.” There was a long pause. When he spoke, his voice was small and quiet.
“I, I just can't..please, not yet, Jenny...” As he trailed off, his wife could only throw her hands up in exasperation.
I'd love some critique on this, no matter how harsh. Any other thoughts would be very much welcomed.
The Pursuit of Grandeur
Pilot Chapter - The Fool
The end of the world was appealing to a lot of people. That was one of the things that Mr. Michael Stubs the Coordinating Assistant Editor of the New York office was most surprised to learn when he first started talking to the strange gentleman. Surely, he thought, if there were such people (other such people, he had begun to correct himself) they would be ashamed at their inability to be satisfied with existence, and would keep their heads down. And yet here were four standing beyond the frame of the doorway in the unassuming room on the 17th floor of the stately New York City lodge. He had just enough time to think that they didn't seem to be particularly outstanding people when the lean man hurried him into the room, frowning and clearly ruffled. Beyond the doorway, the gentleman was sitting comfortably in an uncomfortable looking armchair, ruffling a young woman's hair affectionately while she smiled up at him from the bed beside the chair. A woman examined Stubbs from the other side of the double bed, her brow furrowed in worry lines that seemed to be the natural state of her face. The lean man with the hooked nose, in contrast, did not look at Stubbs's and seemed preoccupied with locking the room.
After the door closed behind him, the occupants of the room stood in stark silence. It took Stubs a moment to realize the reason for the tension, and a pang of guilt struck him as he remembered his wife, forgotten in all his excitement. He turned to look at her, now awkward and hoping she could give him some idea of what to say. She was no help, and simply looked at him with the stern expression that only a wife can convey. Failing her, Stubbs turned to his gentleman, who was sitting contentedly in the simple cloth armchair, with a look of bemused curiosity on his face. He leaned forward to address Stubbs directly.
"Who is she, Stubbs?"
"She's, well she's my wife, sir."
"Were my instructions clear that you were to be accompanied by no one?"
"Yes, they were. But, sir, you must understand, she refused to stay, I couldn't force her to…" The gentleman frowned.
"Stubbs," he interrupted, "I have explained to you our purpose. I have also explained to you our requirements. In order to join us, you would have to leave everything behind. To all family, friends, employers, you must be dead and gone. There was no need to explain anything to her." He paused to push his glasses back against his face. "The question is Stubbs, if you were unable to come here without her, can we expect you fight, kill or die with her? How are we to be certain that you will put anything of importance over her preferences?"
"May I have a word here?" Cut in Stubbs' wife, curtly.
"As many as you like." answered their host, pleasantly. This response was perhaps a bit unexpected, as it took the woman a moment to think of something to say.
"What do you want with my husband?"
"My dear Mrs. Stubbs! You make it sound as though we have kidnapped him!
"You've clearly done something terrible to Micheal, brainwashing or the like. It's a subtle kidnapping. You seem to be the leader of this damned cult, and I have no doubt that you are a master of the ways to subvert a man's mind until you have his psyche dependent on your empty words.” This made the man laughed.
“If that's the case, I'm not much of a master, am I? In fact, I would seem to have failed miserably.” Their was an edge on the voice, and Stubbs had no doubt that is was not the gentleman's own failure of which he was speaking.
"I don't know why, I just had to bring her, sir. I just..."
"But I know why you brought her, Stubbs. It's very clear why you brought her. You brought her because you were unsure of yourself. You were about to cast off the experiences of you entire life, to let go of all the basic rules. You brought her as a lifeline. It's really quite understandable, it would be too much for you to do it all at once, and all on you're own. Which is, of course, why it will be so very effective for you when we convert her to our point of view." The gentleman seemed inexcusably smug.
"When you what?" asked his wife with righteous indignation. Eyebrows raised around the room. The young woman sitting on the bed laughed out loud and Ms. Stubbs shot her a contemptuous look. "I not only think it ridiculous that you believe that I could become a part of this laughable little 'movement,” she curtly informed the gentleman "I think it ridiculous that you are so incorrectly certain that I am going to stay in this room to hear your arguments. My husband and I are getting out of this place now. We are going to get into the car, and we are going to drive home, and we are going to get some sleep, and then we are going to get our heads back together."
"Well, that is most unfortunate, Mr. Stubbs. The organization will be sad to see you go." The gentleman leaned back. Perhaps taking this as consent, the unfortunate wife turned back to Micheal. He looked very small considering that he was not a small man.
“You see all this, Micheal? Take a good look. There is no miracle here, there is no God here, there is no answer here waiting for you with outstretched arms. These people are crazy, demented, and they don't need you to continue their little delusion.” She unlocked the door and motioned to her husband commandingly. “Come with me, Micheal, we're leaving now.” He didn't move. “I said now, Micheal, we're leaving now, Michael.” There was a long pause. When he spoke, his voice was small and quiet.
“I, I just can't..please, not yet, Jenny...” As he trailed off, his wife could only throw her hands up in exasperation.
I'd love some critique on this, no matter how harsh. Any other thoughts would be very much welcomed.