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Santa Saves Christmas
Santa Claus squeezed himself out of the fireplace, brandishing an AK-47. His beard singed and blackend with soot; his sleeves torn with claw marks. His jolly belly jiggling with each frantic breath, Santa dashes out of the den and into the main hall. Outside the sirens blare- old air raid towers, leftovers from the cold war ( Read more... ) -
Ideas
Ideas come from somewhere- the ether of the subconscience? Either way, I gotta have a place to spooge them, so it might as well be here ( Read more... ) -
Very Little Time Left...
The world crumbles slowly at first, but as there is less and less to hang on to, it gets faster and faster ( Read more... ) -
Terrible ideas...
- Kidnap orphans and demand ransom from their parents
- Drink beer through your nose with a straw
- Goudge out your own eyes and eat them
- Email naked pictures of yourself to santa
- Write a script about two guys who sit at a table and play parcheesi. -
Waste of time, waste of energy
It's 10pm, and I haven't touched it. Not once. Not in a long while. I used to spend so much time and care, but lately, I've been letting it sit- letting it sleep. Dangling on the backburner as other things keep coming up. Tonight I tried to move it around; to try something fresh. I approached it from a different angle. I looked at it for a long ( Read more... ) -
4:54
Puked. Spat. Brushed. Here comes the acid reflux again, scorching my throat. It's mingling with the toothpaste in my mouth somewhere at the back of the throat, but all I can still feel is the smell of vomit, rising from the caverns below ( Read more... ) -
I shit my pants at the end of the world
The rain poured down as I waded out of the ocean. No turning back now, I thought. Behind me, the remnants of the 747 Jet-plane I had come in on sank below the surface. In the bubbling uproar, bodies and limbs swirled around lifeless oxygen masks in the water ( Read more... ) -
Apathy
Another school shooting. A highway collapses in Montreal. Iraq borders on civil war. Africans are starving. Natural resources are depleting. The climate is crashing.
But you know what? Nobody seems to care.
And why should we? We have MTV!
The world is a giant cardboard box that's filling up with those little styrofoam peanuts.
