I just do not know.

Feb 28, 2008 15:26

Ahem.

So, I'd like to note, before I say anything else, to those of you who know me 'irl,' this journal is largely used for expressions of frustration with gender identity and things of that nature.  Accordingly, it tends to get rather, well, angsty/intense at points, sometimes very much so.  Sometimes, honestly, I feel a little ridiculous at how ( Read more... )

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goldeneyes17 March 7 2008, 02:15:49 UTC
I appreciate the offer Brien, and as we've already discussed this "irl" so I'll leave this comment at that.

Thank you.

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silberash5 February 29 2008, 01:55:56 UTC
Also hate the pronoun thing. She just isn't me, though most of the time I just let it pass. The name thing bothers me someone in one of my classes used my legal name the other day, and I asked him to NEVER DO THAT AGAIN. Politely.

I honestly prefer the gender-neutral ones zie or hir, which goes over about like a lead balloon in most cases.

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goldeneyes17 March 7 2008, 02:17:58 UTC
Yes, exactly. Godamn, how I wish there was a standardized third gender pronoun in English. Really, that would just be remarkably wonderful. Words have more power than most people realize...

And when words don't even -really- exist(as defined by being used by the majority of people) to describe you... it's just sort of discouraging in a really unpleasant way.

Yeah, it's definitely gotten to the point where when some of my older friends call me by my birth name I almost double-take. It sounds so strange now...

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thec_of_nv February 29 2008, 02:29:01 UTC
I want to find a good gender neutral pronoun to go by. I don't like zie or here at all ( ... )

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goldeneyes17 March 7 2008, 02:33:16 UTC
Man, me neither. Made-up gender neutral pronous seem so awkward and impractical that I'm not even comfortable with using them in real life. It's really fairly depressing that there's not a pronoun for us ( ... )

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booneda February 29 2008, 02:55:01 UTC
Ashton James. That sounds Really cool. I would totally back that decision. And I will also be more than happy to call you with a masculine pronoun. I may forget every now and then, but I'll get it. It's amazing how much power words have, or rather, how much power we give to them.

*HUGS!!*

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goldeneyes17 March 7 2008, 02:19:57 UTC
Aww, thank you so much DA, you're great. ^___^

Forgetting every once in a while is totally understandable. As long as you're trying it totally makes the difference.

-HUGS-

It is really remarkable how not having a third gender pronoun in the English language makes it seem like a third(/non/however people choose to define themselves) gender doesn't even exist.

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openyen March 2 2008, 18:38:40 UTC
I know exactly what you mean about the pronouns. I still don't feel comfortable asking people to use male pronouns for me. I feel like I'm being presumptuous by disrupting their deeply-embedded instinct to refer to feminine-looking/sounding people as "she" and "her", and I don't feel I have the right to make them uncomfortable like that. At the same time, rationally, they are just words, so I don't see why anyone should be uncomfortable or annoyed in the first place. It's like I waver between feeling guilty for throwing off the cadence and feeling rebellious and annoyed that people would care so much in the first place.

I think it's a good idea you told your LGBTA group, though. You can test the pronouns out and see if they're right for you, and if they're not, I doubt anyone in a group like that would mind switching right back. And I'm really glad that it's all coming together for you, man--I'm exactly in that place too, and it's really fucking awesome. You're right, it's funny how we always seem to end up in the same place ( ... )

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goldeneyes17 March 7 2008, 02:27:40 UTC
Gahd, I know exactly what you mean. And also, to me, it seems that if I start going by 'he' then I will officially be "choosing"... but what if I'm not meant to make that choice? What if I'm something in between but just happen to be(generally) significantly more masculine? It feels like I'm going to wind up being mis-perceived either way ( ... )

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