Dear Abby...

Dec 04, 2011 20:25

the advice column meme


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ninja death cult, meme, ali is matt murdock in drag

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Comments 372

bests December 5 2011, 01:27:08 UTC
bests December 5 2011, 02:55:00 UTC
Carol,

Can I call you Carol?

-No Good At Flirting

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bests December 5 2011, 02:57:21 UTC
No Good At Flirting,

Not if you're planning on flirting with me.

- C. Danvers

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bests December 5 2011, 03:17:57 UTC
See, I knew that wouldn't work. Fuck.

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vettecrasher December 5 2011, 01:27:15 UTC

crabulous December 5 2011, 01:27:31 UTC
everyone listen to zoidberg!

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crabulous December 5 2011, 01:30:28 UTC
Dear Zoidberg,

I'd like to break out of jail and kill everyone involved in putting me there, do you have any tips for that? Especially for not ending up in jail again afterward.

Thanks,
Daydreaming of Murder

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crabulous December 5 2011, 01:37:17 UTC
Dear Daydreaming,

Get your head out of the clouds and back into reality! You'll never achieve your goals if you do nothing to actualize them! First you must envision yourself as you wish to be, then you must make it so, why not! Make a plan and follow through, and don't listen to anyone who says you're too ugly or smelly to succeed!

Best wishes,

John A. Zoidberg
A Medical Corporation

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crabulous December 5 2011, 01:40:49 UTC
Dear Zoidberg,

I was looking for actual advice, and those are really awful tips. Who gave you this advice column? I might add them to my list.

No thanks,
Daydreaming of Murder

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(The comment has been removed)

anonymous December 5 2011, 02:06:47 UTC
Catman,

I am attempting to choose a Christmas present for someone. Do you have any gift ideas?

Sincerely,

Santa

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(The comment has been removed)

anonymous December 5 2011, 02:16:43 UTC
Thomas,

Is there anything that could be made in my workshop?

- Santa

PS: Expect numerous designer eyepatches in your stocking.

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screwmeister December 5 2011, 01:27:32 UTC
this is the guy to go to for advice for sure

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screwmeister December 5 2011, 02:54:05 UTC
Dear Professor

How do I convince someone I can take care of myself?

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