Sempiternal [for citrus_sarang]
For: citrus_sarang
Title: Sempiternal
Pairing(s)/focus: JB/JR
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 2,005
Warnings: blood, minor character death, mentions of war
Author's notes: To my recipient, thank you for the wonderful prompts! I had to cycle through the prompts because I had a hard time choosing, but I ultimately went with this one. I hope you enjoy! ^ o ^
Summary: For vampires, forever is too much time. For Jaebum, forever is not enough.
“Do you remember being human?”
It’s the first thing Jinyoung’s said to him the entire evening, after the city died down and the only ones awake were the night walkers. People like them. The supernatural. Jaebum tightens his fingers around Jinyoung’s smaller hand, holding him closer out of habit. Where he expects to hear heartbeats, he hears nothing, just silence.
“It’s been too long to even,” Jaebum answers softly against Jinyoung’s neck. “I can’t even remember anymore.”
Jaebum’s gotten used to the change.
The first time he smelled blood, it was intoxicating. It filled with him with an inhuman desire, and for him, it became him new reality. He didn’t want it. He didn’t want to become this, monster. This vampire. He wanted to be human. He wanted his old life back.
“Sometimes… I do.”
Jinyoung was there to comfort him, to guide him into his new life, and slowly, Jaebum learned to live with it.
The thrill of the hunt. The rush of excitement whenever the moon shined bright against his skin. It was pure bliss. He craved more. He wanted to feel exhilarated, to make up for the pain his thirst carved into his soul. It was an almost animalistic fervor that compelled him to move. To fulfill his new destiny.
“Do you?”
But sometimes, Jaebum’s wishes he was back home with his family, to sleep in familiarity.
That was eighty years ago.
“Will you stay with me forever?” Jinyoung asks one evening, as he fills his thirst with a lone college student they’d found walking the streets.
He remembers to drink only what he needs and nothing more, to make sure that the person stays alive after their feeding. He has much better control than Jaebum, delicate technique as his teeth sink into soft flesh and draw droplets of red.
“Forever is a long time,” Jaebum answers, crossing his arms as he watches Jinyoung drink.
The moon is hidden tonight.
Jinyoung pulls back after a few seconds, wiping away the red on his lips. “It’s not long for us.”
“Not anymore.”
The words hang heavy between them, threatening to choke them as the noose curls tighter around their necks. Jaebum struggles to breathe, but Jinyoung just watches him with pity in his eyes. It’s moments like this that Jinyoung is able to make Jaebum feel human again. Where he feels the guilt slowly wash over him.
Jaebum swallows his words before taking a turn to drink.
He tries not to notice the way Jinyoung stares at him, unblinking.
“I will,” Jaebum says as they lie awake in bed. “Stay with you.”
Jinyoung sits up, letting the black velvet glide along his bare skin until it pools near his hips. He looks just as innocent as the day Jaebum followed him under the light of the moon, all those years ago. His eyes glow a soft red underneath his bangs, just as black as the sky outside.
Breathless. It leaves Jaebum tracing his entire frame with his eyes, taking in the soft curves of his skin, how his chest rises softly with each breath.
When Jinyoung leans forward, curling up his body with his arms wrapped around his knees, Jaebum traces his back, years of memories adorning his skin like a beautiful tattoo. So many questions. Just what kind of person was Jinyoung when he was human?
Was he the same person staring back?
“Do you mean it?” Jinyoung’s voice is meek. Afraid.
With a slowly nod, Jaebum reaches over to brush Jinyoung’s bangs away.
“I promise.”
Jaebum wills himself to believe his words.
When he was human, Jaebum was a lover of music.
He wanted to be a singer, to stand on stage and share his voice with the world. He remembers long nights of sweat and tears, where he would practice until his body caved in and he couldn’t move no more.
It all paid off in the end, when he first stepped out into the spotlight and felt the adrenaline rush into him.
They praised him, showered him with golden words and false promises. Gave him a chance that many only dreamed of. Even now, he dreams. He dreams of standing on that stage one more time, to offer his voice to the millions who waited on him, who lived only for him.
“Jaebum…”
Sometimes Jinyoung catches him singing to himself, and Jaebum would just gaze out through the window, lost yet again.
He can’t give it up.
The last piece of humanity he has left.
Jinyoung was a dancer in his previous life.
Through the small glimpses he allows Jaebum to see, Jaebum learns that Jinyoung was but one of many trainees who failed to make the cut, failure after failure. He never got to see the joy of standing on stage, always too slow, too stiff, not stiff enough.
It’s all that he knows.
Sometimes he dances in the moonlight, drifting along the heavenly glow like a butterfly. He melts into the darkness, and springs to life in the light. A moving masterpiece. His eyes are closed, as if he’s imagining the lights and cheers of the audience he always wanted.
Jaebum can’t take it away from him.
He watches from afar, admiring how Jinyoung’s body bends and twists. How it carves through the air, building a story with the language only his body can speak. Every time he ends, he’s left breathless. They’re both breathless.
“You’re a natural,” Jaebum praises.
Jinyoung shakes his head, cheeky smile flashing back. “I’m not. But thank you. I wish I could show it on a proper stage, but well, life happens.”
“I think it’s better like this,” Jaebum says. “It’s intimate.”
“Intimate…” Jinyoung repeats quietly.
“Do you remember Yugyeom?”
Jaebum scrunches up his face in an attempt to put a face to the name. When he comes up short, he shakes his head sadly.
“Oh,” Jinyoung says.
A heavy conversation dies down before it can even start. When Jaebum stands up to wash his plate in the sink, he catches the obituary post in the newspaper. There, he spots the box circled in red.
Yugyeom Kim. 93. Peace Activist, passed away at 02:45 AM.
Recognition struggles to come back to him, but he just can’t remember the name well enough. Too many memories. They all disappear eventually.
He doesn’t ask when Jinyoung starts to cry.
People die. But they won’t.
“My name is Jaebum. My name is Jaebum. My name is Jaebum.”
He repeats it like a mantra to himself because he doesn’t want to forget. It’s been so long, he’s forgotten his surname all together. A memory that faded away with the rest of the world.
It’s been too long now. Are they still living?
Jinyoung returns after scouring the city for his next feeding, but he comes back with a slump in his shoulders, frustration settling in his brows. Jaebum’s become too familiar with this scene, ever since the city started evacuating itself when the first signs of war loomed over their heads.
People are fragile beings. They don’t want to take any chances. Jaebum doesn’t blame them. He envies them.
“Do you want to leave?”
Jinyoung turns to him slowly, pursing his lips at the question.
“My home is here,” he answers.
The room is empty. No photos. No books or trophies. No videos. No family. Everything from their previous life is gone, withered away into dust.
“Your home is with me.”
The city is empty.
Hand in hand, they walk the streets, never changing, even under the gravity of time. There’s still buildings from a few months ago. Or was it a few years ago? Hell, it might even be a few decades, Jaebum doesn’t know anymore.
“What if we’re the only ones left?” Jinyoung asks as he brings his hand up to clutch at his arm.
Jaebum chuckles, dryly. “Then it looks like I kept my promise.”
A smile stretches across Jinyoung’s lips and it’s there, the same Jinyoung from before. Jaebum brings his arm around Jinyoung and pulls him close to his body, leaning over to press a kiss against Jinyoung’s crown. It has the younger vampire shying away from the touch, but the smile he carries only grows.
“How long has the war been going on?”
Jaebum doesn’t answer as a missile flies overhead, a deadly ghost in the sky. They stop to watch the missile fly into the distance, landing on some unsuspecting city miles away. The heat from the explosion splashes across their bodies, and Jaebum takes it all in, basking in the afterglow. It warms him, knowing that humanity is still the same.
“Too many years,” Jaebum answers later as they walk towards the ruination.
Finding blood in a world gone to hell is much easier than expected.
Jaebum sits by the bank of the river, hidden away by the bridge above them. Jinyoung’s off to the side, feasting away on one of the men-Jackson, he said his name was-who offered them a ride back to the mainland. It was simple to gain his trust, and even simpler to draw blood.
After too many months, Jinyoung almost loses control in his feeding, coming far too close to killing the man. It’s only when Jaebum brings him back to reality does he stop, red eyes calming down from his high.
The reflection in the water is a muddy grey, masking away the imperfections of a face that does not age. It taunts him, reminding him of the fact that he’s not going to die. That he was immortal. He had nothing to live for anymore because he was going to live far beyond it.
He can’t make friends, only to end up sitting at their funeral. He can’t live with that pain anymore.
“You asked if I remember Yugyeom earlier,” Jaebum says after he hears Jinyoung finishing.
Closing up Jackson’s wound, Jinyoung makes a noncommittal sound through his throat.
“The truth is…” Jaebum starts. “I do remember him. Now. He was a good kid. I didn’t think I’d remember anything but, it’s still there. All those years ago. I still remember.”
Strong arms come around to wrap him, secure. Jaebum brings a hand up to rub soft circles into Jinyoung’s forearm.
“Do you ever wonder what it’s like to die?”
Jinyoung has a knife in his hand, but he’s trembling. The kitchen is stale, old blood staining the wall. The edge of Jinyoung’s metal is clean, but he’s trembling.
“Sometimes,” Jaebum says quietly, slowly peeling the knife away. “Living for this long… It’s cruel.”
Jinyoung makes a frustrated noise in his throat. “When can we stop living?”
“I don’t know.” Jaebum offers him a smile. “Maybe one day, when forever isn’t as long.”
The bell from the church tower starts to ring, and Jaebum settles in the chair closest to the window. He motions for Jinyoung to follow, and with trepidation, the young vampire walks over before sitting on his lap, making sure to face him as his hands come up to hold on his shoulders.
“Maybe in another life, we can actually live,” Jinyoung says, keeping his eyes firm on Jaebum.
The sound of gunfire grows louder in the distance.
“That would be nice.”
Jinyoung leans over until his body is too close, his neck poised right at Jaebum’s lips, delicious skin bare and unmarred. It’s an open invitation, but Jaebum takes one glance over to Jinyoung’s eyes to make sure. There’s nothing but red heat staring back him, a soul that’s finally done with everything.
“Go.”
And maybe, Jaebum is too.
Drawing a deep breath, he lets go and sinks his fangs into Jinyoung, blood quickly rushing into his mouth and filling him with a new type of warmth. Lust.
Jinyoung lets out a moan as he shuffles closer, chest to chest, and Jaebum drinks it all in. Tastes everything. Enjoys everything. He could last like this forever.
“I love you.”
He doesn’t say a word as the missile draws closer to them, before everything disappears in white.
[readers, don't forget to leave a comment! anonymous is on if you're shy.]
Title: Sempiternal
Pairing(s)/focus: JB/JR
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 2,005
Warnings: blood, minor character death, mentions of war
Author's notes: To my recipient, thank you for the wonderful prompts! I had to cycle through the prompts because I had a hard time choosing, but I ultimately went with this one. I hope you enjoy! ^ o ^
Summary: For vampires, forever is too much time. For Jaebum, forever is not enough.
“Do you remember being human?”
It’s the first thing Jinyoung’s said to him the entire evening, after the city died down and the only ones awake were the night walkers. People like them. The supernatural. Jaebum tightens his fingers around Jinyoung’s smaller hand, holding him closer out of habit. Where he expects to hear heartbeats, he hears nothing, just silence.
“It’s been too long to even,” Jaebum answers softly against Jinyoung’s neck. “I can’t even remember anymore.”
Jaebum’s gotten used to the change.
The first time he smelled blood, it was intoxicating. It filled with him with an inhuman desire, and for him, it became him new reality. He didn’t want it. He didn’t want to become this, monster. This vampire. He wanted to be human. He wanted his old life back.
“Sometimes… I do.”
Jinyoung was there to comfort him, to guide him into his new life, and slowly, Jaebum learned to live with it.
The thrill of the hunt. The rush of excitement whenever the moon shined bright against his skin. It was pure bliss. He craved more. He wanted to feel exhilarated, to make up for the pain his thirst carved into his soul. It was an almost animalistic fervor that compelled him to move. To fulfill his new destiny.
“Do you?”
But sometimes, Jaebum’s wishes he was back home with his family, to sleep in familiarity.
That was eighty years ago.
“Will you stay with me forever?” Jinyoung asks one evening, as he fills his thirst with a lone college student they’d found walking the streets.
He remembers to drink only what he needs and nothing more, to make sure that the person stays alive after their feeding. He has much better control than Jaebum, delicate technique as his teeth sink into soft flesh and draw droplets of red.
“Forever is a long time,” Jaebum answers, crossing his arms as he watches Jinyoung drink.
The moon is hidden tonight.
Jinyoung pulls back after a few seconds, wiping away the red on his lips. “It’s not long for us.”
“Not anymore.”
The words hang heavy between them, threatening to choke them as the noose curls tighter around their necks. Jaebum struggles to breathe, but Jinyoung just watches him with pity in his eyes. It’s moments like this that Jinyoung is able to make Jaebum feel human again. Where he feels the guilt slowly wash over him.
Jaebum swallows his words before taking a turn to drink.
He tries not to notice the way Jinyoung stares at him, unblinking.
“I will,” Jaebum says as they lie awake in bed. “Stay with you.”
Jinyoung sits up, letting the black velvet glide along his bare skin until it pools near his hips. He looks just as innocent as the day Jaebum followed him under the light of the moon, all those years ago. His eyes glow a soft red underneath his bangs, just as black as the sky outside.
Breathless. It leaves Jaebum tracing his entire frame with his eyes, taking in the soft curves of his skin, how his chest rises softly with each breath.
When Jinyoung leans forward, curling up his body with his arms wrapped around his knees, Jaebum traces his back, years of memories adorning his skin like a beautiful tattoo. So many questions. Just what kind of person was Jinyoung when he was human?
Was he the same person staring back?
“Do you mean it?” Jinyoung’s voice is meek. Afraid.
With a slowly nod, Jaebum reaches over to brush Jinyoung’s bangs away.
“I promise.”
Jaebum wills himself to believe his words.
When he was human, Jaebum was a lover of music.
He wanted to be a singer, to stand on stage and share his voice with the world. He remembers long nights of sweat and tears, where he would practice until his body caved in and he couldn’t move no more.
It all paid off in the end, when he first stepped out into the spotlight and felt the adrenaline rush into him.
They praised him, showered him with golden words and false promises. Gave him a chance that many only dreamed of. Even now, he dreams. He dreams of standing on that stage one more time, to offer his voice to the millions who waited on him, who lived only for him.
“Jaebum…”
Sometimes Jinyoung catches him singing to himself, and Jaebum would just gaze out through the window, lost yet again.
He can’t give it up.
The last piece of humanity he has left.
Jinyoung was a dancer in his previous life.
Through the small glimpses he allows Jaebum to see, Jaebum learns that Jinyoung was but one of many trainees who failed to make the cut, failure after failure. He never got to see the joy of standing on stage, always too slow, too stiff, not stiff enough.
It’s all that he knows.
Sometimes he dances in the moonlight, drifting along the heavenly glow like a butterfly. He melts into the darkness, and springs to life in the light. A moving masterpiece. His eyes are closed, as if he’s imagining the lights and cheers of the audience he always wanted.
Jaebum can’t take it away from him.
He watches from afar, admiring how Jinyoung’s body bends and twists. How it carves through the air, building a story with the language only his body can speak. Every time he ends, he’s left breathless. They’re both breathless.
“You’re a natural,” Jaebum praises.
Jinyoung shakes his head, cheeky smile flashing back. “I’m not. But thank you. I wish I could show it on a proper stage, but well, life happens.”
“I think it’s better like this,” Jaebum says. “It’s intimate.”
“Intimate…” Jinyoung repeats quietly.
“Do you remember Yugyeom?”
Jaebum scrunches up his face in an attempt to put a face to the name. When he comes up short, he shakes his head sadly.
“Oh,” Jinyoung says.
A heavy conversation dies down before it can even start. When Jaebum stands up to wash his plate in the sink, he catches the obituary post in the newspaper. There, he spots the box circled in red.
Yugyeom Kim. 93. Peace Activist, passed away at 02:45 AM.
Recognition struggles to come back to him, but he just can’t remember the name well enough. Too many memories. They all disappear eventually.
He doesn’t ask when Jinyoung starts to cry.
People die. But they won’t.
“My name is Jaebum. My name is Jaebum. My name is Jaebum.”
He repeats it like a mantra to himself because he doesn’t want to forget. It’s been so long, he’s forgotten his surname all together. A memory that faded away with the rest of the world.
It’s been too long now. Are they still living?
Jinyoung returns after scouring the city for his next feeding, but he comes back with a slump in his shoulders, frustration settling in his brows. Jaebum’s become too familiar with this scene, ever since the city started evacuating itself when the first signs of war loomed over their heads.
People are fragile beings. They don’t want to take any chances. Jaebum doesn’t blame them. He envies them.
“Do you want to leave?”
Jinyoung turns to him slowly, pursing his lips at the question.
“My home is here,” he answers.
The room is empty. No photos. No books or trophies. No videos. No family. Everything from their previous life is gone, withered away into dust.
“Your home is with me.”
The city is empty.
Hand in hand, they walk the streets, never changing, even under the gravity of time. There’s still buildings from a few months ago. Or was it a few years ago? Hell, it might even be a few decades, Jaebum doesn’t know anymore.
“What if we’re the only ones left?” Jinyoung asks as he brings his hand up to clutch at his arm.
Jaebum chuckles, dryly. “Then it looks like I kept my promise.”
A smile stretches across Jinyoung’s lips and it’s there, the same Jinyoung from before. Jaebum brings his arm around Jinyoung and pulls him close to his body, leaning over to press a kiss against Jinyoung’s crown. It has the younger vampire shying away from the touch, but the smile he carries only grows.
“How long has the war been going on?”
Jaebum doesn’t answer as a missile flies overhead, a deadly ghost in the sky. They stop to watch the missile fly into the distance, landing on some unsuspecting city miles away. The heat from the explosion splashes across their bodies, and Jaebum takes it all in, basking in the afterglow. It warms him, knowing that humanity is still the same.
“Too many years,” Jaebum answers later as they walk towards the ruination.
Finding blood in a world gone to hell is much easier than expected.
Jaebum sits by the bank of the river, hidden away by the bridge above them. Jinyoung’s off to the side, feasting away on one of the men-Jackson, he said his name was-who offered them a ride back to the mainland. It was simple to gain his trust, and even simpler to draw blood.
After too many months, Jinyoung almost loses control in his feeding, coming far too close to killing the man. It’s only when Jaebum brings him back to reality does he stop, red eyes calming down from his high.
The reflection in the water is a muddy grey, masking away the imperfections of a face that does not age. It taunts him, reminding him of the fact that he’s not going to die. That he was immortal. He had nothing to live for anymore because he was going to live far beyond it.
He can’t make friends, only to end up sitting at their funeral. He can’t live with that pain anymore.
“You asked if I remember Yugyeom earlier,” Jaebum says after he hears Jinyoung finishing.
Closing up Jackson’s wound, Jinyoung makes a noncommittal sound through his throat.
“The truth is…” Jaebum starts. “I do remember him. Now. He was a good kid. I didn’t think I’d remember anything but, it’s still there. All those years ago. I still remember.”
Strong arms come around to wrap him, secure. Jaebum brings a hand up to rub soft circles into Jinyoung’s forearm.
“Do you ever wonder what it’s like to die?”
Jinyoung has a knife in his hand, but he’s trembling. The kitchen is stale, old blood staining the wall. The edge of Jinyoung’s metal is clean, but he’s trembling.
“Sometimes,” Jaebum says quietly, slowly peeling the knife away. “Living for this long… It’s cruel.”
Jinyoung makes a frustrated noise in his throat. “When can we stop living?”
“I don’t know.” Jaebum offers him a smile. “Maybe one day, when forever isn’t as long.”
The bell from the church tower starts to ring, and Jaebum settles in the chair closest to the window. He motions for Jinyoung to follow, and with trepidation, the young vampire walks over before sitting on his lap, making sure to face him as his hands come up to hold on his shoulders.
“Maybe in another life, we can actually live,” Jinyoung says, keeping his eyes firm on Jaebum.
The sound of gunfire grows louder in the distance.
“That would be nice.”
Jinyoung leans over until his body is too close, his neck poised right at Jaebum’s lips, delicious skin bare and unmarred. It’s an open invitation, but Jaebum takes one glance over to Jinyoung’s eyes to make sure. There’s nothing but red heat staring back him, a soul that’s finally done with everything.
“Go.”
And maybe, Jaebum is too.
Drawing a deep breath, he lets go and sinks his fangs into Jinyoung, blood quickly rushing into his mouth and filling him with a new type of warmth. Lust.
Jinyoung lets out a moan as he shuffles closer, chest to chest, and Jaebum drinks it all in. Tastes everything. Enjoys everything. He could last like this forever.
“I love you.”
He doesn’t say a word as the missile draws closer to them, before everything disappears in white.
[readers, don't forget to leave a comment! anonymous is on if you're shy.]