Jennifer and my's song....
"Imaginary"
I linger in the doorway
Of alarm clock screaming
Monsters calling my name
Let me stay
Where the wind will whisper to me
Where the raindrops
As they’re falling tell a story
[Chorus:]
In my field of paper flowers
And candy clouds of lullaby
I lie inside myself for hours
And watch my purple sky fly over me
Don’t say I’m out of touch
With this rampant chaos- your reality
I know well what lies beyond my sleeping refuge
The nightmare I built my own world to escape
[Chorus]
Swallowed up in the sound of my screaming
Cannot cease for the fear of silent nights
Oh how I long for the deep sleep dreaming
The goddess of imaginary light
.........
That's OUR song. :P I'll let your little imaginations just wonder why. we knows it. *sigh* sheesh I miss her now more than ever... she knows all my family drama and I know hers. We go through the same things... and it used to be that we had eachother all the time. When she said that's what she was finding hardest about my being gone, I took it with a pinch of salt but thinking back on it... we spoke EVERYDAY. Just like Marie and I did. I was dumb and would forget it was my turn to call and she would always call me, even if we only saw eachother 20 minutes ago. I never fully appreciated that. I love her so much. I wish she were here right now so I could have a Jennifer hug and we could cry together like the amazing people we are. :P I miss my Big Sister... and she really is like a sister to me. We fight, she puts up with my moodiness, but we make up. Like the day she was pissed off with me in December and we got in the car and she wouldn't talk to me and I knew I'd fucked up and I kept trying to pretend it didn't happen in true Kerry style but she called me on it and I felt like an ass and then before you know it we were laughing again... That's the way it's suppoed to be. Not one person freaking out and never talking to the other person again. Jeez if there's anyone in this world I need forgiveness from it's Jennifer. I don't deserve her friendship most of the time, I'm not even half as amazing as that girl.
really and truly.
She saved me. The Ursuline was a shitty place and she saved me.
I want to say "I need another Jennifer right now" but there isn't one. I just want my Jennifer. Yeah when you see us together we are two dorks but most of the time I don't care about anyone else in the room (unless there's hot males ;)... so many memories...
haha
most of them with us being sick and perverted... actually no I agree with her, we have only become really dirty in recent times. "STANDARDS!" I'm so sorry I let you down in a few ways but I'm trying now, I really am. I really do love you, in a totally non-lesbain way of course, and I just don't even know how to begin to thank you for everything you have shown me/done for me. I'm seriously not worthy.
"Outside"
And you
Bring me to my knees
Again
All the times
That I could beg you please
In vain
All the times
That I felt insecure
For you
And I leave
My burdens at the door
But I'm on the outside
I'm looking in
I can see through you
See your true colors
'Cause inside you're ugly
You're ugly like me
I can see through you
See to the real you
All the times
That I felt like this won't end
It's for you
And I taste
What I could never have
It was from you
All the times
That I've cried
My intentions
Full of pride
But I waste
More time than anyone
But I'm on the outside
And I'm looking in
I can see through you
See your true colors
'Cause inside you're ugly
You're ugly like me
I can see through you
See to the real you
All the times
That I've cried
All this wasted
It's all inside
And I feel
All this pain
Stuffed it down
It's back again
And I lie
Here in bed
All alone
I can't mend
But I feel
Tomorrow will be OK
But I'm on the outside
And I'm looking in
I can see through you
See your true colors
'Cause inside you're ugly
You're ugly like me
I can see through you
See to the real you
our OTHER song. :)