This would be Hamlet commentary, I guess
I apologize for the amount of David Tennant fangirling in this. Without further ado I present my commentary on The Lion King Hamlet.
WOOOO INTRO STUFFS.
I’m soooo happy that Patrick Stewart was finally knighted. :D
OH SNAP DAWG IT’S A SECURITY CAMERA!
“HOLLA BERNARDO.”
OH SNAP THERE BE A GHOST UP IN THIS CASTLE. THEY’D BETTER CALL TAPS.
SWEET BEANS IT’S CAPTAIN PICARD.
DAMN YOU ROOSTER. PICARD WAS ABOUT TO SAY SOMETHING.
YES TELL HAMLET YOU’VE JUST SEEN THE GHOST OF HIS FATHER. FUCK HIM UP EVEN MORE.
I’m not liking Dave’s hair all slicked down like that.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR CROCODILE TEARS CLAUDIUS.
GERTRUDE YOU ARE A MASSIVE HO.
OH HEY WASSUP LAERTES.
“Tis unmanly grief” I have no idea why I love this line so much.
Oooo nice glare Tennant.
Awwwwwww he’s crying….I’m literally tearing up. He is the only actor that makes me cry just because he is. I wanna hug him so bad right now.
OH FUCK HE’S LOOKING DIRECTLY AT THE CAMERA.
“Frailty thy name is woman”
DEAR GOD HE IS SO INTENSE. I think I might have just jizzed myself.
HORATIO! *HUGZ*
I love the WTF face that Tennant is giving right now.
GUH HE’S LOOKING AT THE CAMERA AGAIN.
Why hello there Ophelia
Loooool, this is the whole, “Don’t sleep with Hamlet” speech.
LAERTES JUST GOT SCHOOLED. NICE USE OF CONDOMS.
SOMEONE GET TENNANT HIS DOCTOR COAT HE’S FUCKING COLD.
OMG DADDIE? YOU IS ALIVE?
Tennant does terrified sooooo well.
HAMLET’S GONNA CUT YOU IF YOU GET IN HIS WAY.
“Something’s rotten in the state of Denmark.”
MURDER. XD IS IT SAD THAT ALL I COULD THINK OF WAS THIS:
ANGRY TENNANT IS ANGRY.
Man Patrick Stewart is breaking my heart in this scene.
This scene, just wow.
OH FUCK HE’S LOOKING AT THE CAMERA AGAIN. *jizzes self again*
THAT EYEBROW HE JUST DID. OH FUCK THAT WAS…..
OH FUCK WHERE DID HE GET A SWITCHBLADE?!
Aaaaand he’s lost it.
DISEMBODIED PATRICK STEWARD. THIS IS REMINDING ME OF THE BEGINNING OF DRAGONHEART.
YAY! HIS HAIR IS ALL MESSED UP.
LOOKING AT CAMERA AGAIN.
Oh Polonius spying on your son. Tisk tisk.
Damnit Ophelia, no one likes a snitch.
ROSENCRANTZ AND GUILDENSTERN. WOOOOO.
WOOO NORWAY ISN’T GONNA ATTACK!
You suck Ophelia, you suck.
Polonius you win the horrible father of the year award.
OH SHIT HAMLET, LETS ALL LEAVE.
OH FUCK THAT MUSCLE SHIRT, IT IS DISTRACTING. Unfortunately Tennant’s six pack isn’t as well formed as that shirt:
Ah the ‘To be or not to be’ soliloquy.
TENNANT JIZZ FACE. THAT IS A JIZZ FACE RIGHT THERE.
I’m torn on wether or not I want him to stop looking at the camera.
TENNANT HAPPY TRAIL. :D
OH SHIT I THINK HAMLET KNOWS HE’S BEING SPIED ON.
HE’S BAREFOOT?!
No one cares Ophelia, no one cares.
HE JUST ‘WELLED’
Not liking Polonius breaking the 4th wall as much.
BUT I’M LOVING THAT READING POSSITION.
WOOOOOOOOORDS.
LOOOL THAT FACE.
WOOOOO BUDDIES.
CROTCH SHOT. PLEASE DON’T SIT LIKE THAT DAVID, YOU ARE MAKING ME THINK NAUGHTY THOUGHTS.
Damn, he’s still sitting like that. I just can’t pay attention.
Oh good he got up. *is partly sad*
LIARS.
WOOOOO A PLAY! :D
DAVE STOMACH.
Jeez no wonder Tennant killed his back doing this.
OK I’m loving this old guy.
STFU POLONIUS.
THANK YOU HAMLET.
BRAVO OLD GUY BRAVO.
THAT WAS A VERY DOCTORLY THINK YOU JUST DID. IT WAS LIKE THIS:
ONLY WITHOUT A SONIC AND PHONE SEX WITH JOHN SIMM (Sorry that this clip was so long, I couldn't find the shorter one that I used to have somewhere).
AGAIN WITH THE LOOKING AT THE CAMERA.
FUCK. SO DAMN. INTENSE.
PFFFFT YOU THINK SHIPPING HIM OFF TO ENGLAND WILL SOLVE EVERYHTING. GOOD LUCK WITH THAT.
WOOO TENNANT WITH A CAMERA. THIS REMINDS ME OF HIS VIDEO DIARIES.
TA DA! ILU ROSENCRANTZ AND GUILDENSTERN.
WHISTLING TENNANT FTW.
Is Tennant still barefoot?
TENNANT DANCE!
LOL, CLAUDIUS IS TOTES THINKING “ICWUTUDIDTHAR”
SLINKY PENIS FTW.
TENNANT POINTING WITH HIS FEET, WHY IS THIS SO ADORABLE?
Ooooo lovely glare Sir Patrick.
Head shake. LOL.
LOL THE WRIST.
I’m loving this scene so much.
DAMNIT MAKE HIM HAPPY AND PLAY THE DAMN RECORDER.
HAMLET DOESN’T LIKE BEING FUCKED WITH.
LOL THREE BLIND MICE.
GAH SURPRISE CAMERA TALKING.
You should really get those allergies checked Claudius.
Sorry Claudius murdering your brother isn’t something that really can be forgiven.
OH FUCK NOW PATRICK STEWART IS LOOKING AT THE CAMERA.
He just said engaged. XD
LOL THEY SHOULD PLAY THE JAWS MUSIC RIGHT HERE.
SWITCHBLADE. Aaaaaan commercial.
AAAAAN COMMERCIAL OVER.
Ooooo a voice over.
Yes, Hamlet, plot, you plot good.
GUH CAMERA LOOKING AGAIN.
He should have done the I’m watching you gesture.
YOU EVIL BASTARD CLAUDIUS.
MOTHA! XD
NOW MOTHER WHAT’S THE MATTER?!
OH SNAP HAMLET JUST SHOT POLONIUS.
YOU HAD THE SECKS WITH HIM YOU SICKO.
GERTRUDE’S NIPPLES. DEAR GOD WOMAN WEAR A BETTER BRA.
DADDIE! :D
DUDE TENNANT’S HAMLET IS SO SPAZZTIC.
THAT FACE. I WANT TO HUG HIM SO BAD, HE’S MAKING ME TEAR UP.
Awwww finger kisses.
HE’S CRYING! *wibble wibble*
D’AWWWW HAMLET IS GOING AWAY.
GOOD NIGHT MOTHAR! *drags off body* PFFFT.
PFFT THEY’RE RUNNING AROUND LIKE CHICKENS WITH THEIR HEADS CUT OFF.
SPONGE. XD
HE’S SO CRAZY! I LOVE HIM.
FOR SERIOUS?! DON’T YOU KNOW STRAPPING TENNANT TO A CHAIR AND GAGGING HIM HAS BEEN DONE BEFORE?!
WOOOO TO ENGLAND.
WHEEEEEE.
Oh Ophelia, poor insane Ophelia.
Ooooo Laertes is piiiiiissssed
I like insane Ohpelia better than normal Ophelia for some reason.
WOOOOOO TENNANT IS BACK! :D
AND THE CAMERA LOOKIN IS BACK. OOOO MANLY STUBBLE! :D
POISON. THE PLAY IS NEARING IT’S END.
Aaaaand Ophelia is dead.
Awwwww Laertes needs a hug.
I’m loving this gravedigger.
Awwww Tennant hasn’t shaved yet.
“Alas Poor Yorick, I knew him Horatio” I loved how he delivered that line for some reason.
Awwwww Hamlet sad now.
They’re all like “Fuck. Hamlet’s back.”
JEEBUZ HIS BACK.
BAM SHOULDERED.
ROSENCRANTZ AND GUILDENSTERN ARE DEAD.
GUH TENNANT. IN THAT SHOT:
HE JUST ‘WELL-ED” AGAIN. :D
GUH FENCING SHIRT.
JEANS ARE NOT GOOD FOR FENCING HAMLET, DESPITE THE FACT THAT THEY FRAME YOUR DELICIOUS ASS SO WELL.
Claudius you evil bastard.
Nice little dance there.
YAY A HIT.
DON’T DRINK THE KOOLAID.
WOOOOO ANOTHER HIT! :D
GERTUDE JUST POISONED HERSELF. WOOOOOO.
OH FUCK. HE JUST POISONED HAMLET.
OH SHIT THEY’RE BOTH POISONED.
WOO KILL HIM HAMLET.
*shrug* I LOVE YOU PATRICK STEWART
Aaaaaand Laertes is dead.
HAAAAAMLEEEEEET NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. I mean I knew this was coming but.
DAMNIT I HATE SEEING DAVID TENNANT DIE.
*wibble wibble*
The rest is silence. *sobs*
“Good night sweet prince.”
Aaaaand then Q and the Master show up, prod Picard and the Doctor awake. The Doctor and Picard shake hands and congratulate each other on a brilliant performance. Q and Picard return to the Enterprise, the Master and the Doctor return to the TARDIS, and they all live happily ever after.
Well, at least in my world. XD
I apologize again for the amount of Tennant fangirling, I really can't help myself.
WOOOO INTRO STUFFS.
I’m soooo happy that Patrick Stewart was finally knighted. :D
OH SNAP DAWG IT’S A SECURITY CAMERA!
“HOLLA BERNARDO.”
OH SNAP THERE BE A GHOST UP IN THIS CASTLE. THEY’D BETTER CALL TAPS.
SWEET BEANS IT’S CAPTAIN PICARD.
DAMN YOU ROOSTER. PICARD WAS ABOUT TO SAY SOMETHING.
YES TELL HAMLET YOU’VE JUST SEEN THE GHOST OF HIS FATHER. FUCK HIM UP EVEN MORE.
I’m not liking Dave’s hair all slicked down like that.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR CROCODILE TEARS CLAUDIUS.
GERTRUDE YOU ARE A MASSIVE HO.
OH HEY WASSUP LAERTES.
“Tis unmanly grief” I have no idea why I love this line so much.
Oooo nice glare Tennant.
Awwwwwww he’s crying….I’m literally tearing up. He is the only actor that makes me cry just because he is. I wanna hug him so bad right now.
OH FUCK HE’S LOOKING DIRECTLY AT THE CAMERA.
“Frailty thy name is woman”
DEAR GOD HE IS SO INTENSE. I think I might have just jizzed myself.
HORATIO! *HUGZ*
I love the WTF face that Tennant is giving right now.
GUH HE’S LOOKING AT THE CAMERA AGAIN.
Why hello there Ophelia
Loooool, this is the whole, “Don’t sleep with Hamlet” speech.
LAERTES JUST GOT SCHOOLED. NICE USE OF CONDOMS.
SOMEONE GET TENNANT HIS DOCTOR COAT HE’S FUCKING COLD.
OMG DADDIE? YOU IS ALIVE?
Tennant does terrified sooooo well.
HAMLET’S GONNA CUT YOU IF YOU GET IN HIS WAY.
“Something’s rotten in the state of Denmark.”
MURDER. XD IS IT SAD THAT ALL I COULD THINK OF WAS THIS:
Click to viewANGRY TENNANT IS ANGRY.
Man Patrick Stewart is breaking my heart in this scene.
This scene, just wow.
OH FUCK HE’S LOOKING AT THE CAMERA AGAIN. *jizzes self again*
THAT EYEBROW HE JUST DID. OH FUCK THAT WAS…..
OH FUCK WHERE DID HE GET A SWITCHBLADE?!
Aaaaand he’s lost it.
DISEMBODIED PATRICK STEWARD. THIS IS REMINDING ME OF THE BEGINNING OF DRAGONHEART.
YAY! HIS HAIR IS ALL MESSED UP.
LOOKING AT CAMERA AGAIN.
Oh Polonius spying on your son. Tisk tisk.
Damnit Ophelia, no one likes a snitch.
ROSENCRANTZ AND GUILDENSTERN. WOOOOO.
WOOO NORWAY ISN’T GONNA ATTACK!
You suck Ophelia, you suck.
Polonius you win the horrible father of the year award.
OH SHIT HAMLET, LETS ALL LEAVE.
OH FUCK THAT MUSCLE SHIRT, IT IS DISTRACTING. Unfortunately Tennant’s six pack isn’t as well formed as that shirt:
Ah the ‘To be or not to be’ soliloquy.
TENNANT JIZZ FACE. THAT IS A JIZZ FACE RIGHT THERE.
I’m torn on wether or not I want him to stop looking at the camera.
TENNANT HAPPY TRAIL. :D
OH SHIT I THINK HAMLET KNOWS HE’S BEING SPIED ON.
HE’S BAREFOOT?!
No one cares Ophelia, no one cares.
HE JUST ‘WELLED’
Not liking Polonius breaking the 4th wall as much.
BUT I’M LOVING THAT READING POSSITION.
WOOOOOOOOORDS.
LOOOL THAT FACE.
WOOOOO BUDDIES.
CROTCH SHOT. PLEASE DON’T SIT LIKE THAT DAVID, YOU ARE MAKING ME THINK NAUGHTY THOUGHTS.
Damn, he’s still sitting like that. I just can’t pay attention.
Oh good he got up. *is partly sad*
LIARS.
WOOOOO A PLAY! :D
DAVE STOMACH.
Jeez no wonder Tennant killed his back doing this.
OK I’m loving this old guy.
STFU POLONIUS.
THANK YOU HAMLET.
BRAVO OLD GUY BRAVO.
THAT WAS A VERY DOCTORLY THINK YOU JUST DID. IT WAS LIKE THIS:
ONLY WITHOUT A SONIC AND PHONE SEX WITH JOHN SIMM (Sorry that this clip was so long, I couldn't find the shorter one that I used to have somewhere).
AGAIN WITH THE LOOKING AT THE CAMERA.
FUCK. SO DAMN. INTENSE.
PFFFFT YOU THINK SHIPPING HIM OFF TO ENGLAND WILL SOLVE EVERYHTING. GOOD LUCK WITH THAT.
WOOO TENNANT WITH A CAMERA. THIS REMINDS ME OF HIS VIDEO DIARIES.
TA DA! ILU ROSENCRANTZ AND GUILDENSTERN.
WHISTLING TENNANT FTW.
Is Tennant still barefoot?
TENNANT DANCE!
LOL, CLAUDIUS IS TOTES THINKING “ICWUTUDIDTHAR”
SLINKY PENIS FTW.
TENNANT POINTING WITH HIS FEET, WHY IS THIS SO ADORABLE?
Ooooo lovely glare Sir Patrick.
Head shake. LOL.
LOL THE WRIST.
I’m loving this scene so much.
DAMNIT MAKE HIM HAPPY AND PLAY THE DAMN RECORDER.
HAMLET DOESN’T LIKE BEING FUCKED WITH.
LOL THREE BLIND MICE.
GAH SURPRISE CAMERA TALKING.
You should really get those allergies checked Claudius.
Sorry Claudius murdering your brother isn’t something that really can be forgiven.
OH FUCK NOW PATRICK STEWART IS LOOKING AT THE CAMERA.
He just said engaged. XD
LOL THEY SHOULD PLAY THE JAWS MUSIC RIGHT HERE.
SWITCHBLADE. Aaaaaan commercial.
AAAAAN COMMERCIAL OVER.
Ooooo a voice over.
Yes, Hamlet, plot, you plot good.
GUH CAMERA LOOKING AGAIN.
He should have done the I’m watching you gesture.
YOU EVIL BASTARD CLAUDIUS.
MOTHA! XD
NOW MOTHER WHAT’S THE MATTER?!
OH SNAP HAMLET JUST SHOT POLONIUS.
YOU HAD THE SECKS WITH HIM YOU SICKO.
GERTRUDE’S NIPPLES. DEAR GOD WOMAN WEAR A BETTER BRA.
DADDIE! :D
DUDE TENNANT’S HAMLET IS SO SPAZZTIC.
THAT FACE. I WANT TO HUG HIM SO BAD, HE’S MAKING ME TEAR UP.
Awwww finger kisses.
HE’S CRYING! *wibble wibble*
D’AWWWW HAMLET IS GOING AWAY.
GOOD NIGHT MOTHAR! *drags off body* PFFFT.
PFFT THEY’RE RUNNING AROUND LIKE CHICKENS WITH THEIR HEADS CUT OFF.
SPONGE. XD
HE’S SO CRAZY! I LOVE HIM.
FOR SERIOUS?! DON’T YOU KNOW STRAPPING TENNANT TO A CHAIR AND GAGGING HIM HAS BEEN DONE BEFORE?!
WOOOO TO ENGLAND.
WHEEEEEE.
Oh Ophelia, poor insane Ophelia.
Ooooo Laertes is piiiiiissssed
I like insane Ohpelia better than normal Ophelia for some reason.
WOOOOOO TENNANT IS BACK! :D
AND THE CAMERA LOOKIN IS BACK. OOOO MANLY STUBBLE! :D
POISON. THE PLAY IS NEARING IT’S END.
Aaaaand Ophelia is dead.
Awwwww Laertes needs a hug.
I’m loving this gravedigger.
Awwww Tennant hasn’t shaved yet.
“Alas Poor Yorick, I knew him Horatio” I loved how he delivered that line for some reason.
Awwwww Hamlet sad now.
They’re all like “Fuck. Hamlet’s back.”
JEEBUZ HIS BACK.
BAM SHOULDERED.
ROSENCRANTZ AND GUILDENSTERN ARE DEAD.
GUH TENNANT. IN THAT SHOT:
HE JUST ‘WELL-ED” AGAIN. :D
GUH FENCING SHIRT.
JEANS ARE NOT GOOD FOR FENCING HAMLET, DESPITE THE FACT THAT THEY FRAME YOUR DELICIOUS ASS SO WELL.
Claudius you evil bastard.
Nice little dance there.
YAY A HIT.
DON’T DRINK THE KOOLAID.
WOOOOO ANOTHER HIT! :D
GERTUDE JUST POISONED HERSELF. WOOOOOO.
OH FUCK. HE JUST POISONED HAMLET.
OH SHIT THEY’RE BOTH POISONED.
WOO KILL HIM HAMLET.
*shrug* I LOVE YOU PATRICK STEWART
Aaaaaand Laertes is dead.
HAAAAAMLEEEEEET NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. I mean I knew this was coming but.
DAMNIT I HATE SEEING DAVID TENNANT DIE.
*wibble wibble*
The rest is silence. *sobs*
“Good night sweet prince.”
Aaaaand then Q and the Master show up, prod Picard and the Doctor awake. The Doctor and Picard shake hands and congratulate each other on a brilliant performance. Q and Picard return to the Enterprise, the Master and the Doctor return to the TARDIS, and they all live happily ever after.
Well, at least in my world. XD
I apologize again for the amount of Tennant fangirling, I really can't help myself.