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[gray_ghost710]

“If there are sound reasons or bases for the points you demand, then there is no need to use violence. On the other hand, when there is no sound reason that concessions should be made to you but mainly your own desire, then reason cannot work and you have to rely on force. Thus, using force is not a sign of strength but rather a sign of weakness.

Comments

[vincent710]

So what happens when the other people you argue against don't care/don't believe/don't understand your reason and/or your just not smart enough to express your demands/desires?

Reply 1

[gray_ghost710]

Indeed this is a problem that many people deal with in a day-to-day basis. I would advices the following as an antidote to the problem.

1. Compassion: wanting others to be free from suffering. So compassion is the definition of the highest scope of motivation. It is said that to generate genuine compassion, one needs to realize that oneself is suffering, that an end to suffering is possible, and that other beings similarly want to be free from suffering.

Reply 2

[gray_ghost710]

Compassion would be very important in this situation for it gives us the ability to see the true nature of suffering in the world. Compassion allows us to bear witness to that suffering, whether it is in ourselves or others, without fear; it allows us to name injustice without hesitation, and to act strongly, with all the skill at our disposal. To develop this mind state of compassion… is to learn to live, as the Buddha put it, with sympathy for all living beings, without exception. When you bring a one pointed mindset of compassion toward the other person or people that have failed to head your words, then it lets you begin to understand the reason for why they do not care/don't believe/don't understand your reason. Then closely following compassion is patience. Patience is the main antidote to anger. Once one understands that problems and frustration is a basic fact of life, it can reduce our impatience with our own unrealistic expectations. In other words: nothing is perfect, so don't expect it. Because of my belief that things are

Reply 3

[gray_ghost710]

In case a situation is really unacceptable, and another person needs to be convinced that something is to be done or changed, there is no need to become upset and angry. It is likely much more efficient if you show of understanding and try to make the other understand the need for change. If one needs to appear angry for some reason to convince the other person of the seriousness of the situation, one can think like a parent acting wrathful to prevent the child from harming itself. In general, to be really effective one needs to reflect on quite a number of aspects in one's own mind like; forgiveness, peace of mind, fears, self-acceptance (no acceptance of others is really possible without self-acceptance), habits, prejudices etc. This is also something to keep in mind: “All our hand postures are mudras in that they are associated with subtle or not-so-subtle energies. Take the energy of the fist, for instance. When we get angry, our hands tend to close into fists. Some people unknowingly practice this mudra a lot in their lives. It