A review of the Rite of Sending and Graduation
Although this post is going up at some time after the fact, I wanted to debrief myself with respect to the Rite of Sending and graduation - both things being pre-ordination events at Sacred Heart School of Theology. As a refresher, Sacred Heart is where I studied and took classes while I lived at Saint Francis. I spent the last five years of my life largely favoring the community of Sacred Heart. The older men, complete with 40+ years of life experience, made for much better company. Every year Sacred Heart has a Rite of Sending on the final Wednesday of the year, before we are all scattered to the four corners of the world. Everyone gets the chance to make a two-minute speech - our last words to the school and its staff. Here's my speech - largely unchanged over the last four years of floating around my head.
"For those of you who know me, you may be aware that the last five years of my life has been... incredibly difficult. All the things I thought would be challenges turned out to be nothing at all to fret... And the places where I hoped to find joy, solace, and hope were anything but. The most cruel and merciless things that have ever been said to me have been spoken by a priest or a seminarian. Such things weigh heavily upon me. But I wanted to take this moment to clearly say to you all that for all of this, Sacred Heart has been nothing less than a sanctuary for me. The peace that I enjoyed among this community was immeasurably valuable, especially during my darker days.
There are some that scoff at Sacred Heart, but not me. I know that this place produces great priests, and so many of you have been as Christ to me. Such things have not gone unnoticed by me. So if anyone tries to explain that you or your students are second-hand Catholics, I hope you stand up for yourselves! And if they persist, you sent them to me! I'll set them straight. So thank you all, men and women of Sacred Heart, for your generosity, hospitality, and most of all your righteousness. And don't forget the words of Saint James: the fervent prayer of a righteous person is powerful indeed."
Some of the guys knew what I was going to say and advised me to hold back a bit - to not go quite so bitter. But I chose not to take that advice. I felt the need to be honest, because they deserved it. The message needed the bitterness in my voice: you are righteous, and I know that because I know what un-righteousness looks like. Most everyone of Sacred Heart thanked me for my words and those who knew me understood why I said what I did. The difficulties of my time in seminary were clear enough for those with enough time to observe and study me. It was truly a fine day; all that I could have asked for.
Graduation was two days later on the last Friday of the semester. As the final day at school, I chose to put my fears to rest and fulfill my old promise to Lex: to put a mustache on Saint Awesomeous' statue in the front lobby. Not only did I do so, I wore said mustache around other people and a few choice locations. It got a lot of laughs. One guy, without knowing about the mustache, asked:
"Hey Justin, how's your last day going?"
"I've been making good use of my final hours here."
"That was an odd answer. What are you up to?"
"NOTHING!"
Later on, Father Glenn just asked for it.
"You're about to graduate, Justin. I hope you're not planning to embarrass Saint Francis Seminary."
"Oh, Father Glenn, I would never do anything embarrassing!"
Needless to say, Father Glenn burst out laughing as I pulled out the mustache as I spoke those very words.
So to take a serious turn for a moment, the actual graduation ceremony was absolutely perfect. I honestly wasn't expecting much - I didn't even bother inviting my parents to come. But it turned out that a good graduation experience was exactly what I needed. See, I absolutely hated my graduation from Beloit. I needed to leave and yet needed to stay at the same time. I knew perfectly well that the chances of actually using my degree for something worthwhile was unlikely at best, and that I had graduated by the skin of my teeth. I felt like a complete and total failure that day. My horrible year in Madison following graduation didn't help much in that department.
All this pain dulled in time, as most pain does, and I no longer felt like a failure after Peace Corps. Accomplishing something worthwhile and challenging did wonders for me. You might say that my wounds of Beloit had nicely scabbed over. Nevertheless, some injury still remained beneath the surface. That's what was washed away last Friday: wounds and pains that I had forgotten were even still a part of my being. Knowing that I had earned a master's* degree and earned it well was a part of it. Knowing that I had meaningful work ahead of me was a part of it. But it was also the ceremony itself. I was chosen to give the reading on behalf of the graduates: it was the bit from Ephesians that explains that everyone is called to different tasks by their different gifts - it's a favorite of mine. And Father Weldon's address was wonderfully perfect. He talked about the historicity of the text and how it probably wasn't literally written by Paul himself. He declared this time to be an age of heroes for priests, as the state of the Church will not make life terribly easy for any of us... Rewarding, to be sure, but by no means easy.
He reminded us of our respect for one another in the face of very divergent personal theologies. This was the key for me. I need respect in life. In terms of interacting with other human beings, there may not be anything more important. And disrespectful people have been absolute pains for me: in my social life just as surely as in the parish or seminary. And I am deeply grateful to Father Weldon for saying that my class' primary virtue was our respect for each other. It was a true statement, and it was the main reason I felt more comfortable there than with the guys closer to me in age, experience, or vocation. In short, Weldon's talk nicely mirrored life as experienced by me over the last half-decade. Oh, and the Marion canticle was my favorite tune for that part of the prayer service - and added bonus.
We had a dinner after all that, and my good friend Nick (from Hawaii) presented all the graduates with a lei representing enlightenment and peace. Very cool. He also got me a bottle of sake in recognition for my attempt to get some Japanese down in my free time (Nick also knew some Japanese before entering seminary). I spent the entire evening table hopping and saying my goodbyes to my friends and professors. With the graduation ceremony starting at 4:30, I believe that I headed home at 10:30 or so. The last hour was probably spent at the snarky table, where the other jackasses and I finished off the wine and had our last laughs of the semester. It was good to celebrate till the very end of the night - I rarely stay to the end of a party due to boredom. That wasn't a problem this time! I left by the main doors, rang the bell in front to signal the fact that I was leaving for the last time**, and returned home. It was a night in which I could not ask for anything more, and perfect nights are too rare to go by unappreciated!
As always, thanks for reading.
*Well, a diet master’s degree at any rate.
**Most of the guys try to time their departure such that they ring the bell at 3:00 am. I’m sure it’s hilarious for everyone!
Saint Awesomeous, in all his mustached glory!
A close-up.
When you’re around that much manliness, you can’t help but make a face to reflect your feelings of awe. One day you may understand.
Part of the deal made with Lex is that it had to be my own hair. Thus, I needed a photo as if such a mustache could be grown by a face of mine.
Really, is a caption needed here?
Dr. Gallam and I think philosophic thoughts together, in true dignity.
Father Don and I.
My article in the Catholic Herald. Good article, lousy title. Of course, it’s absolutely true: “Former Peace Corps volunteer to wear Roman Collar instead of lab coat”. It only needed one thing.
Much better!
This was my attempt to make the same facial expression as Father Dehon, the founder of Sacred Heart School of Theology. Frankly, it needed some work.
Two of my good and trusted classmates, from the very beginning. Tony on the left and Rob on the right.
Another good friend, Kelly.
Pat and Kelly, the two Canadian seminarians, don’t see eye-to-eye. Occasionally, that statement can be taken literally.
Having a mustache is no reason not to relive the best scene from Tommy Boy.
