Rejection
#44. Rejection [Eunhyuk/Eunhyuk]
Fandom/Pairing: Super Junior- onesided!Eunhae, Kihae
Length: One-shot
Rating: G
Genre: Angst
Summary: A small cut, but deep, and fatal combined with all the other small cuts you’ve accumulated over time. Because you’re too stupid to avoid getting scratched. Because you never learn your lesson.
You don’t want to think about it. You don’t want to, but the images keep bouncing back into your head.
Donghae and Kibum talking together. Donghae and Kibum laughing together. Donghae and Kibum holding hands. Donghae and Kibum kissing….
Donghae and Kibum.
You growl and fist your bed sheets in frustration.
Why Kibum? What did he have that you don’t?! Why does Donghae keep choosing Kibum over you?!
You clench your eyes shut in fear of your tears spilling over.
You don’t want it to, but the stinging in your eyes, in your chest, is a constant reminder of all the times Donghae has shot you down.
You’re positive that the younger dancer never meant to hurt you- you doubt the fact that Donghae can harm anyone on purpose. That doesn’t change the fact that he did. Donghae’s hurt you countless times, and sometimes you can’t help but think- why?! Can’t you see how much I love you?! And you feel like breaking something, that’s how frustrated you get.
But every time you do, every time, Donghae will come up to you, take a look in your eyes- though you try to avoid his- and ask with all the concern in the world “What’s wrong, Hyukkie? You don’t look well!” And you force yourself to bite your lip and reply, “Nothing. I just thought of something sad.”
And after that, for a while, things will be amazing, because all of Donghae’s attention will be on you. You’ll play games, and laugh, and make fun of each other.
You can’t touch Donghae like Kibum does, but you thinks just being near the younger boy is enough to light a thousand fireworks in your heart.
Things will be well for you until Kibum comes home, and Donghae will pounce on the young actor, and he’ll kiss him on the cheek and he’ll laugh when Kibum pulls a face. He’ll leave you there by yourself, like you were never there in the first place.
And it’s like getting cut on the knife that managed to knick you only the day before. A small cut, but deep, and fatal combined with all the other small cuts you’ve accumulated over time. Because you’re too stupid to avoid getting scratched. Because you never learn your lesson.
Because you always go back to him.
You open your eyes and look blankly at the ceiling.
You do realize that you’ve never actually confessed to Donghae. You realize, for a moment, that there might be a chance that the younger boy feels the same towards you, that everything with Kibum is nothing but a close friendship.
But then you scoff. Close friendship? Who are you kidding?
You contemplate telling Donghae how you feel, but a knock at the door breaks you from your thoughts.
“Are you thinking about sad stuff again?” Donghae asks you with a concerned look on his face.
And you think that it’s better to keep what you have- the happy moments and the sympathy- than risk rejection and ruin everything.
“Yea. Sad things.”
Fandom/Pairing: Super Junior- onesided!Eunhae, Kihae
Length: One-shot
Rating: G
Genre: Angst
Summary: A small cut, but deep, and fatal combined with all the other small cuts you’ve accumulated over time. Because you’re too stupid to avoid getting scratched. Because you never learn your lesson.
You don’t want to think about it. You don’t want to, but the images keep bouncing back into your head.
Donghae and Kibum talking together. Donghae and Kibum laughing together. Donghae and Kibum holding hands. Donghae and Kibum kissing….
Donghae and Kibum.
You growl and fist your bed sheets in frustration.
Why Kibum? What did he have that you don’t?! Why does Donghae keep choosing Kibum over you?!
You clench your eyes shut in fear of your tears spilling over.
You don’t want it to, but the stinging in your eyes, in your chest, is a constant reminder of all the times Donghae has shot you down.
You’re positive that the younger dancer never meant to hurt you- you doubt the fact that Donghae can harm anyone on purpose. That doesn’t change the fact that he did. Donghae’s hurt you countless times, and sometimes you can’t help but think- why?! Can’t you see how much I love you?! And you feel like breaking something, that’s how frustrated you get.
But every time you do, every time, Donghae will come up to you, take a look in your eyes- though you try to avoid his- and ask with all the concern in the world “What’s wrong, Hyukkie? You don’t look well!” And you force yourself to bite your lip and reply, “Nothing. I just thought of something sad.”
And after that, for a while, things will be amazing, because all of Donghae’s attention will be on you. You’ll play games, and laugh, and make fun of each other.
You can’t touch Donghae like Kibum does, but you thinks just being near the younger boy is enough to light a thousand fireworks in your heart.
Things will be well for you until Kibum comes home, and Donghae will pounce on the young actor, and he’ll kiss him on the cheek and he’ll laugh when Kibum pulls a face. He’ll leave you there by yourself, like you were never there in the first place.
And it’s like getting cut on the knife that managed to knick you only the day before. A small cut, but deep, and fatal combined with all the other small cuts you’ve accumulated over time. Because you’re too stupid to avoid getting scratched. Because you never learn your lesson.
Because you always go back to him.
You open your eyes and look blankly at the ceiling.
You do realize that you’ve never actually confessed to Donghae. You realize, for a moment, that there might be a chance that the younger boy feels the same towards you, that everything with Kibum is nothing but a close friendship.
But then you scoff. Close friendship? Who are you kidding?
You contemplate telling Donghae how you feel, but a knock at the door breaks you from your thoughts.
“Are you thinking about sad stuff again?” Donghae asks you with a concerned look on his face.
And you think that it’s better to keep what you have- the happy moments and the sympathy- than risk rejection and ruin everything.
“Yea. Sad things.”