The Eye

[guttersnipe_]

Title: The Eye
Fandom: Harry Potter
Characters: Rufus Scrimgeour, Alastor Moody
Rating: Maybe PG for some blood. Yay blood.
Other: Written for the October 14th challenge (An ice cold eye) for 30_hath.

Comments

[dolabellae]

I've been enjoying your latest politician!fic an awful lot. I like the cold, calculating prose, which seems totally appropriate for Scrimgeour's point of view - and yes, that's a deliberate near quotation of the cold calculation Scrimgeour notices in Moody's eye, because I'm sure one of the things that would make him uneasy would be recognising one of his own qualities, never before associated with Moody, in this new mechanical organ.

And “It’s never polite to stare, Scrimgeour.” is pure Moody. I'm sure he knows exactly what a smile does to his ruined face, too...

(btw, having had a look at the comments posted at the fest, I don't see anything wrong with the 'hads' in your second paragraph. That's what you get when you write in the pluperfect, after all... More formal than much spoken English, of course, but that's just what you want here, isn't it?)

[guttersnipe_]

Hey, thanks for reading this. :D And commenting, whee. Because, aye, would definitely be thinking along the same lines of what yo usaid with Rufus and Moody, which makes me grin. And you just know Moody'd grin to piss Rufus off. XD

(To be fair, I did edit it a bit after that, heh... It was kinda ridiculous. Ah dear. But aye, it does tend to happen that way. And aye, general ideas works pour moi.)

Thanks again. :)