A life lesson maybe?

[hairlessgerbil]

For years, my parents have not been close to anyone. No members of the family, extended family or friends. They have acquaintances and such. They talk to the relatives and see them occasionally. I don't remember them being close to anyone since I was about 9 or 10 years old. My parents never hugged us, never told us they loved us, until we

Comments

[summersnowflake]

I feel very fortunate to have you as a friend. I don't have many, but I treasure the ones I have.

Love you, my favorite gerbil :)

[hairlessgerbil]

Love you, my favorite flake :)

Who would've thought that the internet would do this stuff?

[autifon]

After having you explain your relationship to your parents, I would be surprised if you were much closer than you are. Many in your situation would still be openly hostile.

They gave you away - abandoned, disinherited, cast you off - at some level that sort of betrayal from your parents has got to cut pretty deep. While I believe your wildchild stories, for parents to take those sort of steps is really very serious, & I cannot believe w/o consequences.

There's no reasonable way for him to expect closeness from someone he pushed away in such a markedly visible way. Social Security has a statistic: (and to be honest, the cornerstone of their business philosophy) historically, men die 2-3 yrs after they retire

[hairlessgerbil]

I think what really bothered me most about my disinherited childhood was that they actually blamed me for absolutely everything that happened during that time and after it. They blamed me for having to quit their jobs and move, and literally blamed me for the downturn of the next ten years of their lives. That is a weighty responsibility for a 15 year old, no? :)

I'm telling you, that therapy and that love from actual human beings did wonders. Getting away from my parents at an early age helped quite a bit too. I grew up to consider that disinheriting thing as a gift. Freedom from madness.

I can understand why that statistic exists. Unless you actually have a plan, you flounder. I want to start our own business so we never have to retire :D

[autifon]

Everything seems to interest me. I swear, if I didn't have to work, I would never get bored! There is always something I want to do!

Constantly searching for work is maddening. I hate it w/ a passion, & when my plan to go back to school got squashed, that was a heavy blow.

[hairlessgerbil]

I think our generation will be very different. It is almost as if the entire world opened up to us with the internet and such and it has really broadened our horizons and our interests I think.

[ceciliacarnage]

It is hard when you realize you don't feel the way other people expect that your SHOULD feel. But in all honesty, Miss Yerbihl, how you feel is how YOU should feel. Just because how you feel doesn't fit in with other people's views of it doesn't make it wrong.

Easier said than done not to beat yourself up over it, but you shouldn't. You are a good person. You are doing what you can but you don't owe anyone anything.

It would be like my biological father asking me for something. He wouldn't get it because the man that is my dad married my mother when I was 15.

And I am grateful for the friends, other half and family that I have. =)
You being among one of my favorite friends.

[hairlessgerbil]

You know, that is the conclusion I came to. I can't change it, and I'm just not going to try. I think the real killer is trying to fake it on the phone :)

Awww thanks :) You are too sweet!

[ceciliacarnage]

I don't know about that whole being sweet thing but thank you. =)

It has to be rough trying to cover up that you aren't really wanting to be the comforting one for him at the moment. That whole feeling of being torn between what is almost a familial kind of duty and knowing that it isn't what you want to do...I couldn't do it.

Stronger person than I am ma'am.