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Jan 11, 2007 08:08

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question about poly. lotusbites August 19 2008, 19:03:23 UTC
Hi there,

I read your comment on a post in the polyamory group and I was fascinated by your story. It sounds like you have two very solid relationships. I was just wondering if you might be able to tell me what first brought you to decide to explore polyamory. I know it is a rather personal question. In fairness I will share some personal details with you: I myself am a commitied monogamist. I have a friend who has dated two poly men in the past few years and both relationships were very hurtful to her. Both men were selfish and manipulative. I have feared that by seeking out poly men she was ruining her chance at happyness. Until I read your post. I want to be a good friend to her and be able to support her but although we have been close for years I know that she has felt judged by my stance on polyamory and this has hurt our friendship. I really want to understand. Why not just one?

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Re: question about poly. hakatrip August 26 2008, 01:49:30 UTC
Sorry to take so long to reply. I am on a road trip, and internet access has been extremely minimal. What brought me to explore it was a book my husband handed me back when we were just friends. It just made so much sense... I had broken up with someone as a teen because I was attracted to someone else, not because the relationship was bad. It just seemed so wrong, and it was so painful for him. I have many family members who have had affairs and split their families, and remarried, and etc. I studied biology, and primatology was by far my favorite class. We are primates. Chimps and bonobos are our closest animal cousins, and they are not monogamous ( ... )

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