(Untitled)

[hannahcarrietta]

Title: The Plan

Comments

[rioko_avalon]

This is really good with keeping with the story line from before. I kept getting mixed up with the dialog, though.

"when someone talks," i say.

"when another person talks," he says. "but then he continues to talk."

then more story. I'm so sorry that I pointed this out but I'm a part time beta and it irked me.

[hannahcarrietta]

I am sorry that you got mixed up.

Dialog is the hardest part of the story for me to write. Also I am usually writing these stories at 3am in the morning when I have a class in a few hours and haven't slept in days. Law school is slowly killing my mind.

Thanks for the review.