I would like out of this time machine, please.
It's kind of interesting to think about how far back we've really gone when it comes to sex within the last few years. I mean, I remember that condoms weren't this weird taboo thing, and the idea of women fucking because they want to was actually like relatively common. Like Salt-n-Pepa songs. And Left Eye from TLC with her condom eyepatch.It seems like that's changed somewhere between when I was a teenager and when I was grown. And, how I feel most of the time aside, I'm not that old.
And now, we get shit like this in terms of trend pieces. This is that online mag's health editor. Really. Jesus wept.
Starting with the "abortion is murder" rhetoric and the Camille Paglia quote (I didn't know anyone read her still, now that we have Ann Coulter to be unpleasantly right-wing) , and heading into the raging bullshit about the pill. Yes, some may cause weight gain, and some may cause spotting. Alternately, pregnancy tends to cause a lot of tummy-girth and the pill is actually used to treat spotting. And then the "lol, teehee, I only take pills right if they're getting me high, also the pill never works for me.!" Uhh, I think I found your problem. Also, Plan B is just a super megadose of the pill, but I suspect she actually hasn't picked up on this.
I know there's a lot of debate going around as to whether this is supposed to be satire or not. Poe's Law strikes again! There's no wit or wink that would be there is it were good satire, so maybe it's terrible satire and she's an incompetent writer? This is a mystery like some kind of non-Euclidean relic in a Lovecraft story, where no matter what, I will go irreparably insane from pondering it. So, moving along.
Can I just point out how completely ridiculous it is to write "I hate talking about my sex life!" over and over in your column, the subject of which you chose, and presumably you have a delete key? It's this creepy 1950s coyness that's seeping its way back in to the basement of our view on sex like Love Canal groundwater. And about as healthy! Because there's nothing that says "I am an adult who actively consents to sex" like this "Ooh, I shouldn't, but I suppose if it doesn't look like I planned it, I could just say it happened!" thing. Which, hey, is also what she's doing when it comes to actual sex, not just talking about it, so I suppose I can give her a gold star for being consistent.
But that's not what really got me. It hit me like a ton of bricks while I was sitting here, drinking my coffee.
This passage here: " Condoms. Nope! As if. I don't know. I don't sleep with that many people and so I just don't do condoms! "
STIs are not actually a deity's punishment for harlotry, nor do they emerge as a form of spontaneous generation from a mysteriously-able-to-count orifice. Along related lines, meat does not spontaneously generate maggots, and mice to not appear from grain. I'm sorry if this comes as a shock to anyone, but I thought we had already as a society pretty much accepted germ theory. It turns out that there are people who don't still, and they're not just weird fundamentalists. Apparently hip magazine writers are kicking it old-school. I can't wait to see her next feature, where we learn how to balance our humours. Alchemical makeup?
And now, we get shit like this in terms of trend pieces. This is that online mag's health editor. Really. Jesus wept.
Starting with the "abortion is murder" rhetoric and the Camille Paglia quote (I didn't know anyone read her still, now that we have Ann Coulter to be unpleasantly right-wing) , and heading into the raging bullshit about the pill. Yes, some may cause weight gain, and some may cause spotting. Alternately, pregnancy tends to cause a lot of tummy-girth and the pill is actually used to treat spotting. And then the "lol, teehee, I only take pills right if they're getting me high, also the pill never works for me.!" Uhh, I think I found your problem. Also, Plan B is just a super megadose of the pill, but I suspect she actually hasn't picked up on this.
I know there's a lot of debate going around as to whether this is supposed to be satire or not. Poe's Law strikes again! There's no wit or wink that would be there is it were good satire, so maybe it's terrible satire and she's an incompetent writer? This is a mystery like some kind of non-Euclidean relic in a Lovecraft story, where no matter what, I will go irreparably insane from pondering it. So, moving along.
Can I just point out how completely ridiculous it is to write "I hate talking about my sex life!" over and over in your column, the subject of which you chose, and presumably you have a delete key? It's this creepy 1950s coyness that's seeping its way back in to the basement of our view on sex like Love Canal groundwater. And about as healthy! Because there's nothing that says "I am an adult who actively consents to sex" like this "Ooh, I shouldn't, but I suppose if it doesn't look like I planned it, I could just say it happened!" thing. Which, hey, is also what she's doing when it comes to actual sex, not just talking about it, so I suppose I can give her a gold star for being consistent.
But that's not what really got me. It hit me like a ton of bricks while I was sitting here, drinking my coffee.
This passage here: " Condoms. Nope! As if. I don't know. I don't sleep with that many people and so I just don't do condoms! "
STIs are not actually a deity's punishment for harlotry, nor do they emerge as a form of spontaneous generation from a mysteriously-able-to-count orifice. Along related lines, meat does not spontaneously generate maggots, and mice to not appear from grain. I'm sorry if this comes as a shock to anyone, but I thought we had already as a society pretty much accepted germ theory. It turns out that there are people who don't still, and they're not just weird fundamentalists. Apparently hip magazine writers are kicking it old-school. I can't wait to see her next feature, where we learn how to balance our humours. Alchemical makeup?