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[happyness4eva]

Well Today was FANTASTIC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yeh just being able to talk to you's all and it just seemed like old times and i hope it stay that way...... which it should!! Im just over all my problems so ive decided i have no problems and im just happy happy happy... omg rennae and me walked home this arvo and i fell over

Comments

[dookie_182]

yes i am very much still feeling dogged. not so much by emma anymore. but i am very angry at one person very much and she pushes me the wrong way tomorro im going to skitz up at her so bad coz ive had enough of her shit

[happyness4eva]

wel i dunno if they did u'll have 2 ask them but i wasnt even looking your way so yeh.. and it does sound a bit like ur having a go at me but u say ur not so i believe ya! and i didnt say u werent allowed i was asking how u felt...so i dnt know where u got that from.. u cant help how u feel. i knew u would start freaking out but im not gonna forget you ive just found that for me its the best way to live and to have fun.. theres always room in our group 4 u always u no that. like i dont mean to make u freak out but being happy and carefree is me i want to live each day as it comes and like its my last because you never know when your time is up and i wanna die HAPPY.. happy just me being down is one way that i cant live and as some1 pointed out to me.. i bottle up emotions so i can stay happy and then wen i finally fall i fall right down to the bottom and then soon after i pick myself up again and back to me and i have to say shes right.. yes fiona is right what she sed but there are so many ways to look at different problems so there

[dookie_182]

i understand that you need to be happy and carefree and thats great. and i know you are like that.
but it just seems like people use me to talk to when they are feeling shit but the moment they are feeling better i dont exsist. and i was thinking that you might do the same thing. and im scared of losing that closness with you bcoz it felt so good. and it was just like for once you knew where i was coming from and kinda understood. and now i dunno i just feel like i might have lost that.
and i know i shut you out, and it is becoz i know you wont understand but it just hurts coz i say 2 emma or rennae or you that i just need someone to notice when im not ok and just give me a hug and re-assure me and tell me that i mean something to them. and none of yous really take it in. i dont think im making too much sense. im pretty emotional right now and theres so much going on. its just rennae is being the biggest dog n she doesnt even realise im shitty at her....maybe i will talk to her, but i can just see her denying everything..........