(no subject)
I've talked a bit before about things that just don't do it for me in cyber, but that was more about fetish type stuff. There are plenty of "don'ts" to remember in general as well.
Don't ignore what the other person likes. There's a reason I ask at the start of anything, because the goal of cybering is for both people to enjoy themselves. If both people aren't enjoying what they're doing, then it's fucking pointless.
Don't stray from the scene. There's one particular person I'm thinking of that would do this over and over and over again and now I just ignore her. Say we brainstorm up a scenario about a teacher and student after school. That's fine, as long as you stick to those roles and that setting. To just suddenly change it up so that we're cousins at a cabin on a lake really takes you out of the moment. Especially when there have been like 3 other role and location changes inbetween.
Don't add extra characters. This has happened so many times, and once they introduce another character into the fantasy, I know it's going to be over. It almost always boils down to one person playing two or even three characters and eventually they're just talking to themself, leaving you to just sit there and watch. If I wanted to just sit there and watch, I'd go download porn instead of finding somebody else to have sexy chat with.
Don't take over. This kinda goes along with the above. If you're going to be telling me what to say and do and how to act, then why am I even participating? I'd like to think that people cyber because they enjoy the interaction with another person in exploring a fantasy. If you have to micromanage every little part of it, then you should just write a story and enjoy it by yourself.
Don't break character. If you are playing an 18-year old cheerleader, don't then tell me "btw, i'm really 34, married, and have 3 kids." It ruins the fantasy. Even if you do it before we start or after we're done. If I wanted to know and care about who you were, I'd be on a dating service or something else a little less...skeevy.
Don't look for oranges in the apple bin. Ok, that's kind of a metaphor, but it happens more than you would think. If I'm in a chat room titled something like Girls Who Swallow, then it's pretty obvious what I'm there looking for. If you are not a girl, or you do not swallow, then I have no interest in talking to you. If I wanted to talk to a guy who likes it in the ass, I'd probably be in a chat room titled Guys Who Like It In The Ass.
Lastly, Don't be a tease. If you have come to do the nasty via your keyboard, then don't play hard to get for 3 hours. It's a waste of my time. Seriously, these things take a while to do. It's not unusual for cybering to take 2 hours, start to finish, because both sides have to type everything out. If clothes aren't coming off within 45 minutes, then it's taking too long and I'll get bored. There is an exception to that, and that's if you're an interesting person who puts some life into your end of the bargin. Be descriptive about you, your body language, your expressions, share your thoughts. Cyber sex is like writing a story together. Think about the last really good book you read, and then think about how bland it would be if nothing was explained or described in any detail and nobody had any personality. It really helps.
Don't ignore what the other person likes. There's a reason I ask at the start of anything, because the goal of cybering is for both people to enjoy themselves. If both people aren't enjoying what they're doing, then it's fucking pointless.
Don't stray from the scene. There's one particular person I'm thinking of that would do this over and over and over again and now I just ignore her. Say we brainstorm up a scenario about a teacher and student after school. That's fine, as long as you stick to those roles and that setting. To just suddenly change it up so that we're cousins at a cabin on a lake really takes you out of the moment. Especially when there have been like 3 other role and location changes inbetween.
Don't add extra characters. This has happened so many times, and once they introduce another character into the fantasy, I know it's going to be over. It almost always boils down to one person playing two or even three characters and eventually they're just talking to themself, leaving you to just sit there and watch. If I wanted to just sit there and watch, I'd go download porn instead of finding somebody else to have sexy chat with.
Don't take over. This kinda goes along with the above. If you're going to be telling me what to say and do and how to act, then why am I even participating? I'd like to think that people cyber because they enjoy the interaction with another person in exploring a fantasy. If you have to micromanage every little part of it, then you should just write a story and enjoy it by yourself.
Don't break character. If you are playing an 18-year old cheerleader, don't then tell me "btw, i'm really 34, married, and have 3 kids." It ruins the fantasy. Even if you do it before we start or after we're done. If I wanted to know and care about who you were, I'd be on a dating service or something else a little less...skeevy.
Don't look for oranges in the apple bin. Ok, that's kind of a metaphor, but it happens more than you would think. If I'm in a chat room titled something like Girls Who Swallow, then it's pretty obvious what I'm there looking for. If you are not a girl, or you do not swallow, then I have no interest in talking to you. If I wanted to talk to a guy who likes it in the ass, I'd probably be in a chat room titled Guys Who Like It In The Ass.
Lastly, Don't be a tease. If you have come to do the nasty via your keyboard, then don't play hard to get for 3 hours. It's a waste of my time. Seriously, these things take a while to do. It's not unusual for cybering to take 2 hours, start to finish, because both sides have to type everything out. If clothes aren't coming off within 45 minutes, then it's taking too long and I'll get bored. There is an exception to that, and that's if you're an interesting person who puts some life into your end of the bargin. Be descriptive about you, your body language, your expressions, share your thoughts. Cyber sex is like writing a story together. Think about the last really good book you read, and then think about how bland it would be if nothing was explained or described in any detail and nobody had any personality. It really helps.