The Burning, Chapter 3 (GaaNaru)
WARNINGS: This story contains yaoi (male/male) sexuality, violence, and mature themes. Also, this chapter includes a scene of slightly dubious consent. If any of this bothers you, feel free to read something else. :) For the rest of you... I hope you enjoy! Happy new year (almost)!
Naruto fidgeted, shifting from foot to foot. He knew it would do nothing to help the heat, but he couldn’t just stand still, even though his teammates were relatively quiescent as they awaited their orders. In the short few hours he’d taken to get used to Suna shinobi garments, he’d learned that Gaara was absolutely right about the under-layer… and the headdress.
Gaara, he thought. Why is it always Gaara? His mind drifted to another time he’d said those words, screamed them aloud. He’d been insane then, he decided, insane with grief over having lost his best friend, especially after Gaara had changed his life so completely in order to become a good leader… after all that, to die at the hands of some stupid jerks who cared only for the tailed beast that had been the absolute bane of Gaara’s existence… it was just too much. But insane or not, he’d meant every word, and for every tear he’d shed over the lifeless body he’d shed a thousand more inside. He knew the absolute loneliness of being a jinchuriki, and the absolute joy that came from having that loneliness turned into warmth and companionship. It wasn’t something anyone else could understand.
His mind twisted away from that terrible day. The shock on Gaara’s face when he awoke, his expression, as if he’d been saved from the clutches of Hell itself … it wasn’t something Naruto wanted to think about long. What mattered is that Gaara was here now, Naruto decided firmly. But why did the redhead seem to always have something up his sleeve? The few times they’d come into contact with each other, it was as if Gaara almost had a different personality each time. At first he’d been cold and homicidal, next time a combination of an invalid and gracious and caring leader, then this last time - a nervous wreck! Something, something hadn’t been right his first day here. Gaara had seemed so happy to see him and then he’d changed. And Naruto still hadn’t had a chance to ask him what was really going on. He was a pretty bold person, but they’d also kept him pretty busy.
“All right.” The mission leader’s voice was quiet, but it carried. Everyone went absolutely still and faced forward. “You’ve been briefed already. We’ve just received word that the target is to the west. I don’t have to tell you to be extremely cautious.” There were nods and murmurs of assent. “Eight of our best have been taken down by this… thing, whatever it is.” He jerked his head. “Uzumaki, I need you in front, please.”
“Yes sir,” Naruto snapped brightly and joined the commander. He was proud to be out in front. Whatever it was, he was confident he could fry it with a well-placed Rasengan - assuming he was allowed to get close enough. That wasn’t in the plan, of course, but who knew what might happen? He could feel Yamato’s eyes on him, as well as Neji’s Byakugan.
As they ran, Naruto reflected on what he knew. Small squads of patrolling shinobi had been felled by a menace no one could detect, much less identify. They were not killed, strangely enough, but were knocked out cold… all but one. There was always one left conscious, and that person returned to report the damage. The council had decided that whatever this person or thing was, it was likely some kind of spy, something meant to test the powers of the shinobi. Just before losing consciousness, one of the warriors - a battle-hardened sensory-type with a high rating of empathy - had reported feeling the greatest concentration of hatred he had ever sensed from anyone or anything. Thus the presence of Naruto: someone had remembered the connection between hatred and the nine-tailed fox. They knew it was risky to involve him since the menace was unknown. Neither Tsunade nor Gaara had liked the idea the least bit, but Naruto - being Naruto - was intrigued and, as usual, had argued to be allowed to join the fight. Of course, the fact that it would put him in close proximity to Gaara again couldn’t have anything to do with his desire to visit Suna.
After what seemed like hours of running through the sand, the company halted. They had almost-literally stumbled across three bodies, a good mile from where the last sentries had been posted. Of course, they then discovered that these were not dead bodies, but -
“Still alive,” the commander announced grimly. Six warriors hastened forward to carry the fallen back to the medical corps at the rear. The commander drew a kunai and stared around them grimly.
Suddenly, there was a loud cry to Naruto’s left, which was abruptly cut off. At the same time he felt it: in the damp prison inside his soul, the fox growled and lashed his tails, teeth bared. Without thinking about it, Naruto’s eyes canted to the left. “Neji!” he screamed, hurling a kunai in the direction he sensed.
The two of them worked together in deadly choreography. It was immediately clear that Neji’s Byakugan couldn’t see the attacker clearly, and neither was Naruto’s fox-sense entirely accurate, but between the both of them they managed to hit the thing: one of Neji’s kunai drew blood.
Having a visual target, Yamato struck out with Wood Style and several sand shinobi joined in with mid-range weaponry and jutsu. To Naruto’s astonishment, though, any shinobi that got too close was immediately rendered unconscious, and the thing seemed to dodge the attacks with amazing accuracy - even slipping around Yamato’s branches. It’s reading our goddamned minds, Naruto thought with frustration. He had been carefully instructed to stay back since most of his attacks were close-range, but that didn’t stop him from joining his kunai with the others’.
A sudden sandstorm blew up right next to that elusive splash of blood, and then coalesced around it, revealing a human form. The sand continued to pour in and contract … and then was suddenly blown off, as if by a bomb. There was a deafening roar, and simultaneously, several more shinobi collapsed. The commander stepped forward with a blistering oath and slammed his hands into the earth.
And all hell broke loose.
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“GY-AAAAAH! GET ME OUT OF HERE!” Gaara felt several rapid-fire blows to the sand shield - annoying, but not enough to crack it.
“Calm DOWN, Naruto! It’s just my sand. And we can’t leave yet.”
Gaara heard Naruto’s sharp intake of breath at the sound of his voice. “Gaara?”
“Who else?” Gaara asked wryly.
“Wh-what happened? Where are we?”
“The enemy struck you and knocked you out… I think. And then my captain blew up half the countryside, from the feel of it.”
“Blew up - what do you mean? Where ARE we?” Gaara heard the panic re-entering Naruto’s voice. Funny, Gaara thought. I never knew he was claustrophobic. “We’re inside my sand shield,” Gaara said. “When I said he blew up half the countryside, I meant it. He’s an Earth Style user. But it seems the enemy got him.”
“So we’re underground, then?” Naruto’s voice was quieter, almost resigned. Gaara heard him sit down on the ground, then jump up rapidly. “HEY! I could bust us out of here -”
“You can’t, Naruto,” Gaara replied wearily. “The only reason we’re not crushed right now is my sand. My people know we’re down here. We’re just going to have to wait.”
“Oh.” Naruto all but collapsed in disappointment. “How can you be sure they know where we are?”
“My sand,” Gaara said simply.
“Your sand is up there too?” Naruto sounded astonished.
“Some of it is,” Gaara explained. “From what I can tell, my sand is much like your shadow clones. I know what the sand knows. I can feel the pressure of the rocks and dirt on us, and I can… hear what they’re saying up there. The commander was incapacitated after he performed his jutsu, but they’ll get us out soon enough. They have another Earth Style user on the way.”
“Gaara,” Naruto said - and Gaara could hear that edge of panic creeping back in. “How - how do you know we won’t run out of air? I feel like I - can’t breathe.”
“Try to calm down.” Without really thinking about it, Gaara reached out, and felt what he assumed was Naruto’s shoulder. “There is plenty of air. The rocks above us are… broken up. It’s not a solid wall. Even my sand shield isn’t airtight. It just feels that way.”
“It feels -” Naruto began to pant slightly. “It feels like I - I can’t get enough air -”
A series of images flashed in Gaara’s mind: a small farming village; a spooked horse; a lady stepping in to hold the horse’s head, stroking its neck, murmuring soothing words near its ear. Gaara felt around and located his friend’s other shoulder, then shifted his weight onto his knees so he could embrace Naruto fully. He instantly received a faceful of spiky hair, and moved his head until he felt his lips graze the shell of an ear. “Naruto,” he whispered. “Slow down your breathing. There is plenty of air. I promise. Do you trust me?”
In spite of himself, Naruto shivered, feeling Gaara’s voice down at the base of his spine. Gaara wouldn’t lie to me, he thought, somewhat irrationally. He’s the Kazekage. “Yes,” he panted.
“Then hear my words. We will not suffocate. I have been inside this shield many times, under considerably more pressure than this.”
Naruto gulped and nodded. He had a fleeting thought that he should be struggling out of Gaara’s grip, but somehow he didn’t want to. Gaara felt warm, and … sturdy. Grounded. Like the earth itself.
“Trust me.”
Naruto inhaled deeply. He smelled dust, dirt, something explosive… almost like a firecracker… and below that, the tang of sweat, and something sweetly spicy. Like cinnamon, almost. He inhaled again and realized the spicy smell clung to Gaara’s hair. Still dizzy, he concentrated on just that smell, and started to feel a little better.
At the same time, Gaara’s heart rate was speeding up. Now that he knew they were both safe, relatively unharmed, and that they would be down here for … quite a while … his thoughts were racing. He could smell Naruto’s fear, his adrenaline-soaked sweat, hear his still-harsh breathing, and feel his pounding pulse.
Hesitantly, lightly, hands almost trembling, Gaara began to stroke Naruto’s back. “It’s all right,” he murmured over and over. “It’s all right, we’re safe, it’s all right…” Hearing Naruto’s breathing slow down a bit more, Gaara ran his fingers over the blond shinobi’s spiky hair, continuing down the side of his face. His motions were slow and repetitive. He realized that he had somehow shifted from holding Naruto against his body, to sitting almost face to face with him. As he touched him, Gaara felt Naruto’s head tilt gradually up and back, almost like a cat inviting him to scratch under his chin.
The vulnerability of his friend’s neck, the absolute darkness, the sound of Naruto’s shuddering breaths, were suddenly too much for Gaara. The predator inside him - no longer Shukaku, but his own lust, mixed with a desperate love and longing - hissed at him that now was the time to go for the kill, to take what he wanted. A low growl issued from the Kazekage’s throat. One hand fisted in Naruto’s spiky locks, pulling his head back even farther, while the other snaked around Naruto’s ribs to draw him as close as humanly possible to Gaara’s pounding heart. His teeth found Naruto’s pulse; the blonde’s surprised gasp only encouraged him, and he sucked greedily at the tender flesh. Naruto moaned and twisted; his hands flew to the back of Gaara’s head, but didn’t try to push Gaara away. Further encouraged, the redhead used his grip on Naruto’s hair to guide the blonde’s gasping, whimpering mouth to Gaara’s own. He licked hungrily, impatiently, at the other shinobi’s lips; when Naruto opened up - to cry out or to breathe, Gaara wasn’t sure - Gaara eagerly dived in. Their tongues locked as if in battle, teeth clicking together. Naruto’s grip tightened on Gaara’s hair, not to pull the redhead away, but to pull him closer. He was still breathing hard, but (to Gaara’s relief) he seemed to be enjoying himself, if his whispery moans were any indication.
Gaara felt as if he were melting and drowning at the same time. Naruto’s tongue and lips were so warm, so wet and slick - the taste of battle and fear so strong - the blond shinobi’s body so close - the heat between them made Gaara think of shimmering, dancing waves in the baking desert sand. How am I not on fire? he wondered vaguely. His body was screaming at him; his skin - all of his skin - thirsted for his precious blonde. He could not hold enough, could not touch enough, could not taste enough to keep up with his desire.
Naruto pulled back just a little. “Gaara,” he growled. “Aaah…” For the Kazekage’s hands were not idle. Gaara grabbed both layers of Naruto’s desert robes, tugging them over his head and yanking Naruto’s arms upward, and then sunk his slender fingers into the mesh shirt that Naruto had apparently insisted on wearing as well. He gave a hard yank. The mesh did not rip completely. Groaning in frustration, he attacked the fabric with hands and teeth. He was tugging impatiently at the drawstring of Naruto’s shorts when he felt hands pulling tentatively at his own clothing. He sat back on his heels and quickly stripped himself down to his own shorts before going back to work on Naruto.
Meanwhile, the blond shinobi helpfully untied the string, allowing Gaara to pull the shorts down around his knees. He caressed Gaara’s smooth back, marveling at the softness of the skin and the strength of the lean muscles beneath. Then he gasped and forgot everything else when Gaara’s mouth returned to his heated flesh.
Naruto was moving on a wave of sensations - the pain of the rocks digging into his back and legs; the warm, hard strength of his friend’s arms around him; the intense pleasure of Gaara’s insistent tongue and gentle teeth. Gradually - as if in a dream, or underwater - he became aware of a strange sound; one that persisted and grew stronger. With a snap, he realized what it was… and that both of them were about to be in a very awkward situation.
“Gaara,” he moaned huskily. Gaara did not stop; if anything, his pace increased. “Hey - G-Gaara!” With a monumental effort, he drew himself back from the Kazekage’s very warm and insistent mouth.
The knowledge that Naruto was trying to tell him something finally penetrated Gaara’s lust-fogged brain. He sat up, taking a deep breath. “What is it?” he rasped.
“They’re coming,” Naruto panted. “I think I hear digging.”
Gaara paused. He heard what Naruto was talking about: not traditional digging using shovels, but the careful shifting of the ground by the earth-style shinobi. Since Neji was unavailable, the Suna shinobi wasn’t sure exactly where his Kazekage was buried, and so was being very deliberate in his work.
Gaara drew a deep, shuddering breath. “I hate to say it,” he began quietly, “but we should get dressed.”
Naruto instinctively nodded, then remembered Gaara couldn’t see him and replied aloud, “Okay.” He stood carefully on shaky legs, pulled his shorts back up, and re-tied them. He was just wondering how he was going to locate the rest of his clothes when he felt Gaara push them gently into his chest. “Thanks.” He found the neck-hole, and after a few more seconds, determined which side was the front. He briefly considered separating the outer and inner robes and donning them one at a time, then decided that they were stuck together so firmly that he could probably just slip them both on at once. He fingered the remains of his mesh shirt clinging to his arms before allowing it to slide off. There would be no saving it. As he struggled back into the still-unfamiliar robes, he thought to himself: What the hell just happened?
Gaara pulled on his own clothes quickly and quietly, his mind in turmoil. His emotions teetered wildly from elation, to annoyance, to consternation, to concern. As the Kazekage, he felt incredibly guilty for taking his attention off his people after a battle, even if there was nothing he could do for them at that moment (the menace had been dealt with, at least temporarily). As a man in love - he blinked. In love? … yes, he was, wasn’t he? - he was ecstatic that he had made his wishes known, and that his advances had not been rejected. He was thrilled about the possibilities the future might hold. He was extremely irritated that their tryst had been interrupted, even though rationally he could hardly blame his people for coming to the rescue as quickly as possible. Finally, as a friend, he worried that he had upset Naruto. In the heat of the moment, he hadn’t stopped to think that his friend might consider his attention unwanted… even somewhat of an assault - especially considering Naruto’s vulnerable state of mind from the close quarters. And just because Naruto hadn’t stopped him, didn’t mean he welcomed Gaara’s advances. Gaara sighed heavily. In all his thoughts and dreams - and there had been many - he had never imagined that this would be the way he would inform his best friend of his desires.
He could feel the pressure above them lessening. Quickly, he turned toward Naruto; his friend had stopped rustling, which must mean he was finished getting dressed. “Naruto?” he queried tentatively.
“Yeah - I’m here,” Naruto said. He sounded distracted, maybe even annoyed.
“Are you all right?”
“I’m fine now.” Naruto sighed. “They’re almost here, aren’t they?”
“Just a few more minutes.” Gaara kept his tone neutral, but his mind was once again in overdrive. Was Naruto “fine” now that he was about to be rescued from the dark, enclosed space? Or “fine” now that Gaara had stopped his advances? Gaara thought again of how his best friend had moaned and writhed beneath him, and shivered.
“Gaara.” Now the blonde’s tone was definitely more somber. “What just happened here?”
“Naruto…” Gaara swallowed hard. “I’m sorry I never told you.” He was even sorrier that there was no light; he couldn’t read his friend’s expression, couldn’t tell what he should do, how much he should disclose. What the hell, he decided miserably. This can’t get much worse. “I’ve been - I’ve had … thoughts about you for a while now. I meant to discuss it with you first. I didn’t mean to do it like th-”
“I know that,” Naruto said with a touch of asperity in his voice. “You may be the Kazekage, but I don’t think you could have planned this!” He gestured around them, then paused, remembering they were still in the dark. “The cave-in, I mean. And I’m so glad your sand was there. You saved me.”
Gaara read between the lines. Glad you saved me. Not glad you practically raped me.
His heart sank.
“Naruto,” he replied, his voice heavy. “I’m so sorry.”
“It’s okay, Gaara,” Naruto said, and Gaara could hear the sincerity in his tone. “Really. It wasn’t - wasn’t bad. It felt good. Really good! It was just - I just didn’t expect it. You know? We’re both guys. I never thought…” He trailed off.
“Naruto,” Gaara breathed. He had to hurry; the time for conversation was almost over. “If you don’t want - if you are not interested, I can - this doesn’t have to continue. Things can be like they were before.” He could hear the desperation in his own voice, but he couldn’t control it. “I can’t afford to lose your friendship.” He paused. “I would rather die again.”
Naruto gasped. “Gaara, don’t say that!”
“It’s true.” Gaara looked up. He could feel the movement of the earth over the sand just above them. “Naruto, we will have to finish this conversation another time. I only ask - no matter what else happens… please promise me that you won’t go away.” He realized there were tears leaking from his eyes, and angrily swiped at them with his hand. “Please - don’t stop being my friend just because I made a mistake.” He was begging, he realized. The Kazekage was begging. But he was too upset to feel ashamed. More than anything, he wanted to touch Naruto again - to hug him, or reach for his hand.
“Gaara, I would never,” and now there was genuine regret in Naruto’s tone. “You’re one of my precious people, believe it! And of course we have to stay friends, because I’ll be Hokage someday and we’ll have all those boring conferences and meetings and stuff and we’ll have to take breaks and none of the other Kages like ramen...” Naruto knew he was babbling but couldn’t stop himself. “Just - don’t worry about anything, okay? We have to deal with this jerk who’s been attacking your village and - we have a job to do,” Naruto finished firmly. “There will be time to talk later.”
I hope so, Gaara thought. Things didn’t look good, but at least he had Naruto’s word that their friendship would continue. He clung to that thought, trying to seal his bleeding heart.
His shinobi were just outside now. His heart lifted as he prepared to dissolve his sand. He would be glad to see them, to know that they were all right. They were what was most important. His personal dilemmas could wait.