YunJae one-shot by me ^^'
Title: Can't Say I Love You
Pairing: YunJae
Rating: NC-17
Genre: Smut, romance, angst
A/N: As you guys probably know, English is not my first language so please forgive if there are some errors .__.' I used to write a lot before but in Finnish so.. Hope you guys will like it!
In the darkest hours of one busy Friday night in Seoul, Yunho and Jaejoong meet again.
It's way below zero degrees and Jaejoong is freezing. He's stepping out of a convenience store and lighting a cigarette. He sees a familiar figure approaching, his face is hidden but Jaejoong can tell who it is before the man even crosses the street.
He can feel his insides turning and the cigarrette is forgotten as he lays his eyes on his ex-bandmate. Yunho has a beanie and sunglasses on, he looks busy and is probably out after schedule to buy a midnight snack.
A few seconds pass and Yunho enters the Seveneleven. Jaejoong can breathe again, his presence was unnoticed. He sits down on a bench in front of the shop and inhales some smoke, his hands trembling.
He knows he should go. Yunho and him have nothing and too much to say to each other; he knows it's better to leave and pretend it never happened. But Jaejoong can't help but think: he looked so good, he looked so good. I can at least say hello to him.
But Jaejoong is scared, he's afraid Yunho won't speak to him or even look at him. Before he has a chance to make a decision, Yunho exits the store with a small plastic bag of food. He stops to check if his wallet is still in his back pocket and then sees Jaejoong sitting on the bench beside him.
"Yunho." Jaejoong says and looks up at the man he's loved from the very first moment they met. Yunho doesn't reply - he looks like he's frozen in sheer shock, but then their eyes meet for a second and Yunho is turning away. No, don't. Not like this.
"Yunho, please don't go." Jaejoong stands up, too afraid to touch the man but he knows Yunho is listening from the way his neck stiffens.
"I've missed you. Please, talk to me," Jaejoong says and his voice is so quiet Yunho almost can't hear him but then, Yunho turns, sighs and sits down on the bench Jaejoong was occupying just now.
He takes the club sandwich he just bought from his bag and opens the package. It's ham and cheese and Jaejoong doesn't really like it but when Yunho hands him the cheese one, he takes it anyway and sits next to Yunho.
Jaejoong's heart is beating so fast he's sure Yunho can hear it, does he hate me?
"It's freezing in here. Should you be sitting outside in front of a convenience store all by yourself?" Yunho asks and his voice is raspy. Jaejoong can tell his been singing all day. Are they releasing a new album?
"I don't know", Jaejoong says and feels stupid for answering like that. The love of his life is sitting right beside him and he can't think of anything better to say! But Yunho just looks so good, Jaejoong notices; he's gained some weight and is a little tanned, probably from a commercial filmed abroad in some sunny location.
"Don't you have stuff to do?"
"Don't you?"
"Yeah, we had an interview at a radio station just a block away from here. Changmin's waiting for me." Yunho mumbles while eating his sandwich.
Jaejoong is starting to panic. He doesn't have a lot of time, Yunho has to go soon and he hasn't gotten anything out of his mouth other than meaningless small talk so he grabs Yunho's sleeve. Tears are threatning to come out of his eyes but Jaejoong bites his lip, not wanting to cry in front of Yunho - he knows Yunho doesn't like it when he cries.
Yunho looks at the man who has a death grip on his sleeve and smiles tenderly. He can't be angry when Jaejoong looks like that.
"Your bottom lip is quivering, you big cry baby. I still have a few minutes left."
"Why didn't you return my calls?" Jaejoong tries to change the subject and lets go of Yunho's clothing. It feels embarrassing but Yunho doesn't seem to be affected at all.
"You know I can't. I have a new number."
They sit in silence for a short moment until Yunho suddenly takes Jaejoong's hand. He holds their joined hands on the bench between their bodies, safe from the eyes of people passing by. Yunho doesn't look at him but Jaejoong knows. He gasps - Yunho still loves him.
"I want to kiss you", Jaejoong whispers and squeezes the warm hand in his cold one. It's starting to snow. It doesn't really look pretty but to Jaejoong it's the most beautiful sight ever, the gray pavement under his feet turning white. Yunho loves him!
Jaejoong hears Yunho breath a little uneven and inches just a bit closer, he rests his head on Yunho's shoulder and doesn't really care if someone sees them like that. It feels so warm, so safe.
It's quiet again and for a moment Jaejoong thinks Yunho doesn't want to kiss him anymore until Yunho clears his throat and says in a hoarse voice:
"There's a motel nearby.."
The cheese sandwich is left forgotten on the bench as Jaejoong stands up together with Yunho, their hands separate but they walk side by side. Jaejoong's heart is going crazy, the beats are frantic and almost hurt.
There's a flashing sign that says there are rooms available in the shabby love hotel they enter. Yunho presses a random room number, not really caring what the room will look like and hides his face as he takes the key from the counter.
The elevator takes them up four floors until they reach their destination and enter room number 421. Jaejoong can barely get his shoes off before Yunho kisses him hard, and in seconds he feels himself fall back in love with the taller man.
Yunho touches his sides and hips like he's saving the best part for last, and Jaejoong grabs Yunho's hair urging him to continue. The kiss turns even more hungry as the back of Jaejoong's knees touch the bed and then Yunho is on top of him, between his legs like every night they spent together a few years ago.
Jaejoong is gasping for air as Yunho kisses his neck. He doesn't care if Yunho leaves marks, doesn't care if a bomb were to explode right there right now, cause in this moment Yunho is his again.
A moan escapes Jaejoong's lips when he feels Yunho's groin press onto his and he lifts his hips, desperate to feel more friction between them. Yunho is just as excited, his hands loved by Jaejoong shake a little when he takes his jacket and shirt off and kisses the man underneath him again.
Yunho has forgotten about Changmin waiting in the car in front of the radio station and doesn't hear his phone ring when Jaejoong's shirt comes off, exposing all that milky skin Yunho craves to touch.
Jaejoong's nails dig into Yunho shoulders and then trail into Yunho's dark locks when he feels Yunho's tongue on his nipples. It feels so good Jaejoong almost can't take it and he doesn't even try to be quiet.
"Yunho..." Jaejoong tries to speak but fails because Yunho's tongue has travelled to his navel and Yunho is grabbing his arousal through Jaejoong's jeans. "Ah!"
How much has Jaejoong missed these hands on his body, loving every inch of him.
"Don't speak, please don't speak." Yunho mutters against Jaejoong's skin sounding so desperate that freaks Jaejoong out a little - Yunho is never desperate. It's always Jaejoong who's the demanding one.
The jeans come off and Yunho is back on top of him, kissing his neck and ears. Yunho is obviously avoiding Jaejoong's gaze but Jaejoong won't stop him now. Not when they're finally together here.
Yunho's hands sneak onto Jaejoong's backside, the older man arching his back to encourage Yunho. Jaejoong returns the favor and starts savoring Yunho's neck and feels fingers inside his boxers touching his entrance.
It's been a while and it hurts a little when two fingers enter him and Jaejoong spreads his legs wider but Yunho is gentle. Slowly, Yunho starts to move his fingers and Jaejoong gasps grabbing Yunho's shoulders again.
There's no time for proper foreplay so Yunho just withdraws his fingers and opens his jeans while Jaejoong takes off his boxers and then reaches for the lube on the nightstand and squeezes a generous amount on his hand. Jaejoong can't wait anymore so he pulls Yunho back to his plump lips and grabs his dick with a lubed hand.
There's a restrained moan from Yunho when Jaejoong starts pumping his hand to get the lube on him and Jaejoong feels proud because Yunho rarely makes any noises in bed.
Yunho lifts Jaejoong's legs to his sides and touches Jaejoong's entrance with the head of his penis. Jaejoong forgets all about Yunho's request to not speak and gasps;
"Fuck me, fuck me already!"
And then Yunho is entering and it hurts so good, Jaejoong feels so full and doesn't care if he sounds like a needy bitch moaning like that but it's all for Yunho. He wants Yunho to know how good he feels, how perfect their encounter is to him.
Small drops of sweat are forming on Yunho's forehead when he tries not to move too quickly, slowly pulling out and back in and to him, Jaejoong is the most perfect sight under him.
Yunho can already feel Jaejoong's inner muscles constrict around him and he looks in the eyes of the beautiful man on the verge of orgasm.
Yunho takes his face in his hands and kisses him, whispering,
"Stay with me baby. Stay with me."
He kisses the tears from Jaejoong's eyes and keeps moving slowly, making love to the man he never stopped loving. Jaejoong is already so close when he looks into Yunho's warm eyes and sees the longing in there, the yearning to love Jaejoong like nothing ever happened.
Jaejoong breathes out and kisses Yunho with all he's got, this might be the only night they'll ever have together and Jaejoong wants Yunho to remember it until the day he dies. The pace quickens, Yunho grips Jaejoong's hips and thrusts in, no more caring if Jaejoong comes.
Jaejoong's eyes roll into the back of his head; he can feel Yunho so deep inside him and he tries to hold back but it's just too much. His grip on Yunho's hair tighten and he can't control his voice anymore, whimpering when the first waves of his orgasm hit him.
Yunho hits Jaejoong's prostate dead on and Jaejoong is coming, muffling his scream into the back of his hand as strands of white hit Yunho's stomach.
There's no need for Yunho to hold back either and they're still in a hurry, so Yunho fucks him harder, enjoying the last spasms of Jaejoong's worn out body. It feels like they never broke up when Yunho comes hard inside the older man's body and bites Jaejoong's upper lip, a moan escaping his lips into his lover's open mouth.
His orgasm lasts forever, and when Yunho finally opens his eyes, he sees Jaejoong under him, hair ruffled up, cheeks red, glowing.
They look into each others eyes, trying to catch their breath.
"I'm sorry I can't say I love you", Yunho whispers and strokes Jaejoong's chin and lower lip with his thumb.
"You don't have to. I know", Jaejoong smiles and blinks tears away from his eyes. "You have to go."
"I know."
Yunho sighs and gets off Jaejoong, zips up his pants and tries to find where his shirt landed before. Jaejoong admires Yunho's back muscles when the taller man puts on his sweater and jacket before turning to look at the other man on the messed up bed.
Jaejoong doesn't try to hide his naked body and sits up, reaching for Yunho's face. They kiss for a long time until Yunho breaks away reluctantly and pecks Jaejoong's forehead.
"Take care", Yunho says and goes, leaving Jaejoong alone sitting on the bed they made love in.
It's way past 2 am when Jaejoong leaves the motel, finds out that Yunho has already paid for it and for some reason he feels like walking home. It's still snowing and the roofs of the cars parked on the love hotel's parking lot are covered in snow.
The streets look like a nightmare for late night drivers going home and it's freaking cold. Jaejoong is about to light a cigarette when his phone in his pocket vibrates.
It's a new text message from a number Jaejoong doesn't know and he opens it, expecting it to be about work.
'Got home, the maknae's pissed. Hope this is your number. You owe me for that sandwich. From, your lovely U-know.'
Jaejoong smiles and his heart skips a beat. Snowflakes fall on his iphone's screen and he puts it back into his pocket, heading towards home admiring his gray world turning white.
END
~*~*~
So.. tell me what you think? *www*
Pairing: YunJae
Rating: NC-17
Genre: Smut, romance, angst
A/N: As you guys probably know, English is not my first language so please forgive if there are some errors .__.' I used to write a lot before but in Finnish so.. Hope you guys will like it!
In the darkest hours of one busy Friday night in Seoul, Yunho and Jaejoong meet again.
It's way below zero degrees and Jaejoong is freezing. He's stepping out of a convenience store and lighting a cigarette. He sees a familiar figure approaching, his face is hidden but Jaejoong can tell who it is before the man even crosses the street.
He can feel his insides turning and the cigarrette is forgotten as he lays his eyes on his ex-bandmate. Yunho has a beanie and sunglasses on, he looks busy and is probably out after schedule to buy a midnight snack.
A few seconds pass and Yunho enters the Seveneleven. Jaejoong can breathe again, his presence was unnoticed. He sits down on a bench in front of the shop and inhales some smoke, his hands trembling.
He knows he should go. Yunho and him have nothing and too much to say to each other; he knows it's better to leave and pretend it never happened. But Jaejoong can't help but think: he looked so good, he looked so good. I can at least say hello to him.
But Jaejoong is scared, he's afraid Yunho won't speak to him or even look at him. Before he has a chance to make a decision, Yunho exits the store with a small plastic bag of food. He stops to check if his wallet is still in his back pocket and then sees Jaejoong sitting on the bench beside him.
"Yunho." Jaejoong says and looks up at the man he's loved from the very first moment they met. Yunho doesn't reply - he looks like he's frozen in sheer shock, but then their eyes meet for a second and Yunho is turning away. No, don't. Not like this.
"Yunho, please don't go." Jaejoong stands up, too afraid to touch the man but he knows Yunho is listening from the way his neck stiffens.
"I've missed you. Please, talk to me," Jaejoong says and his voice is so quiet Yunho almost can't hear him but then, Yunho turns, sighs and sits down on the bench Jaejoong was occupying just now.
He takes the club sandwich he just bought from his bag and opens the package. It's ham and cheese and Jaejoong doesn't really like it but when Yunho hands him the cheese one, he takes it anyway and sits next to Yunho.
Jaejoong's heart is beating so fast he's sure Yunho can hear it, does he hate me?
"It's freezing in here. Should you be sitting outside in front of a convenience store all by yourself?" Yunho asks and his voice is raspy. Jaejoong can tell his been singing all day. Are they releasing a new album?
"I don't know", Jaejoong says and feels stupid for answering like that. The love of his life is sitting right beside him and he can't think of anything better to say! But Yunho just looks so good, Jaejoong notices; he's gained some weight and is a little tanned, probably from a commercial filmed abroad in some sunny location.
"Don't you have stuff to do?"
"Don't you?"
"Yeah, we had an interview at a radio station just a block away from here. Changmin's waiting for me." Yunho mumbles while eating his sandwich.
Jaejoong is starting to panic. He doesn't have a lot of time, Yunho has to go soon and he hasn't gotten anything out of his mouth other than meaningless small talk so he grabs Yunho's sleeve. Tears are threatning to come out of his eyes but Jaejoong bites his lip, not wanting to cry in front of Yunho - he knows Yunho doesn't like it when he cries.
Yunho looks at the man who has a death grip on his sleeve and smiles tenderly. He can't be angry when Jaejoong looks like that.
"Your bottom lip is quivering, you big cry baby. I still have a few minutes left."
"Why didn't you return my calls?" Jaejoong tries to change the subject and lets go of Yunho's clothing. It feels embarrassing but Yunho doesn't seem to be affected at all.
"You know I can't. I have a new number."
They sit in silence for a short moment until Yunho suddenly takes Jaejoong's hand. He holds their joined hands on the bench between their bodies, safe from the eyes of people passing by. Yunho doesn't look at him but Jaejoong knows. He gasps - Yunho still loves him.
"I want to kiss you", Jaejoong whispers and squeezes the warm hand in his cold one. It's starting to snow. It doesn't really look pretty but to Jaejoong it's the most beautiful sight ever, the gray pavement under his feet turning white. Yunho loves him!
Jaejoong hears Yunho breath a little uneven and inches just a bit closer, he rests his head on Yunho's shoulder and doesn't really care if someone sees them like that. It feels so warm, so safe.
It's quiet again and for a moment Jaejoong thinks Yunho doesn't want to kiss him anymore until Yunho clears his throat and says in a hoarse voice:
"There's a motel nearby.."
The cheese sandwich is left forgotten on the bench as Jaejoong stands up together with Yunho, their hands separate but they walk side by side. Jaejoong's heart is going crazy, the beats are frantic and almost hurt.
There's a flashing sign that says there are rooms available in the shabby love hotel they enter. Yunho presses a random room number, not really caring what the room will look like and hides his face as he takes the key from the counter.
The elevator takes them up four floors until they reach their destination and enter room number 421. Jaejoong can barely get his shoes off before Yunho kisses him hard, and in seconds he feels himself fall back in love with the taller man.
Yunho touches his sides and hips like he's saving the best part for last, and Jaejoong grabs Yunho's hair urging him to continue. The kiss turns even more hungry as the back of Jaejoong's knees touch the bed and then Yunho is on top of him, between his legs like every night they spent together a few years ago.
Jaejoong is gasping for air as Yunho kisses his neck. He doesn't care if Yunho leaves marks, doesn't care if a bomb were to explode right there right now, cause in this moment Yunho is his again.
A moan escapes Jaejoong's lips when he feels Yunho's groin press onto his and he lifts his hips, desperate to feel more friction between them. Yunho is just as excited, his hands loved by Jaejoong shake a little when he takes his jacket and shirt off and kisses the man underneath him again.
Yunho has forgotten about Changmin waiting in the car in front of the radio station and doesn't hear his phone ring when Jaejoong's shirt comes off, exposing all that milky skin Yunho craves to touch.
Jaejoong's nails dig into Yunho shoulders and then trail into Yunho's dark locks when he feels Yunho's tongue on his nipples. It feels so good Jaejoong almost can't take it and he doesn't even try to be quiet.
"Yunho..." Jaejoong tries to speak but fails because Yunho's tongue has travelled to his navel and Yunho is grabbing his arousal through Jaejoong's jeans. "Ah!"
How much has Jaejoong missed these hands on his body, loving every inch of him.
"Don't speak, please don't speak." Yunho mutters against Jaejoong's skin sounding so desperate that freaks Jaejoong out a little - Yunho is never desperate. It's always Jaejoong who's the demanding one.
The jeans come off and Yunho is back on top of him, kissing his neck and ears. Yunho is obviously avoiding Jaejoong's gaze but Jaejoong won't stop him now. Not when they're finally together here.
Yunho's hands sneak onto Jaejoong's backside, the older man arching his back to encourage Yunho. Jaejoong returns the favor and starts savoring Yunho's neck and feels fingers inside his boxers touching his entrance.
It's been a while and it hurts a little when two fingers enter him and Jaejoong spreads his legs wider but Yunho is gentle. Slowly, Yunho starts to move his fingers and Jaejoong gasps grabbing Yunho's shoulders again.
There's no time for proper foreplay so Yunho just withdraws his fingers and opens his jeans while Jaejoong takes off his boxers and then reaches for the lube on the nightstand and squeezes a generous amount on his hand. Jaejoong can't wait anymore so he pulls Yunho back to his plump lips and grabs his dick with a lubed hand.
There's a restrained moan from Yunho when Jaejoong starts pumping his hand to get the lube on him and Jaejoong feels proud because Yunho rarely makes any noises in bed.
Yunho lifts Jaejoong's legs to his sides and touches Jaejoong's entrance with the head of his penis. Jaejoong forgets all about Yunho's request to not speak and gasps;
"Fuck me, fuck me already!"
And then Yunho is entering and it hurts so good, Jaejoong feels so full and doesn't care if he sounds like a needy bitch moaning like that but it's all for Yunho. He wants Yunho to know how good he feels, how perfect their encounter is to him.
Small drops of sweat are forming on Yunho's forehead when he tries not to move too quickly, slowly pulling out and back in and to him, Jaejoong is the most perfect sight under him.
Yunho can already feel Jaejoong's inner muscles constrict around him and he looks in the eyes of the beautiful man on the verge of orgasm.
Yunho takes his face in his hands and kisses him, whispering,
"Stay with me baby. Stay with me."
He kisses the tears from Jaejoong's eyes and keeps moving slowly, making love to the man he never stopped loving. Jaejoong is already so close when he looks into Yunho's warm eyes and sees the longing in there, the yearning to love Jaejoong like nothing ever happened.
Jaejoong breathes out and kisses Yunho with all he's got, this might be the only night they'll ever have together and Jaejoong wants Yunho to remember it until the day he dies. The pace quickens, Yunho grips Jaejoong's hips and thrusts in, no more caring if Jaejoong comes.
Jaejoong's eyes roll into the back of his head; he can feel Yunho so deep inside him and he tries to hold back but it's just too much. His grip on Yunho's hair tighten and he can't control his voice anymore, whimpering when the first waves of his orgasm hit him.
Yunho hits Jaejoong's prostate dead on and Jaejoong is coming, muffling his scream into the back of his hand as strands of white hit Yunho's stomach.
There's no need for Yunho to hold back either and they're still in a hurry, so Yunho fucks him harder, enjoying the last spasms of Jaejoong's worn out body. It feels like they never broke up when Yunho comes hard inside the older man's body and bites Jaejoong's upper lip, a moan escaping his lips into his lover's open mouth.
His orgasm lasts forever, and when Yunho finally opens his eyes, he sees Jaejoong under him, hair ruffled up, cheeks red, glowing.
They look into each others eyes, trying to catch their breath.
"I'm sorry I can't say I love you", Yunho whispers and strokes Jaejoong's chin and lower lip with his thumb.
"You don't have to. I know", Jaejoong smiles and blinks tears away from his eyes. "You have to go."
"I know."
Yunho sighs and gets off Jaejoong, zips up his pants and tries to find where his shirt landed before. Jaejoong admires Yunho's back muscles when the taller man puts on his sweater and jacket before turning to look at the other man on the messed up bed.
Jaejoong doesn't try to hide his naked body and sits up, reaching for Yunho's face. They kiss for a long time until Yunho breaks away reluctantly and pecks Jaejoong's forehead.
"Take care", Yunho says and goes, leaving Jaejoong alone sitting on the bed they made love in.
It's way past 2 am when Jaejoong leaves the motel, finds out that Yunho has already paid for it and for some reason he feels like walking home. It's still snowing and the roofs of the cars parked on the love hotel's parking lot are covered in snow.
The streets look like a nightmare for late night drivers going home and it's freaking cold. Jaejoong is about to light a cigarette when his phone in his pocket vibrates.
It's a new text message from a number Jaejoong doesn't know and he opens it, expecting it to be about work.
'Got home, the maknae's pissed. Hope this is your number. You owe me for that sandwich. From, your lovely U-know.'
Jaejoong smiles and his heart skips a beat. Snowflakes fall on his iphone's screen and he puts it back into his pocket, heading towards home admiring his gray world turning white.
END
~*~*~
So.. tell me what you think? *www*