(no subject)
I was going to explode yesterday at work. I almost did. But I've proved to be a dud. It didn't have anything to do with coffeemaking, but here are some notes for people who order coffee:
Breve - pronounced breh vay. Also, made of half and half. That's right, CREAM. Don't order these. No one needs them. Just because you're on the Adkins Diet does not mean that you should consume as much fat as possible.
2% lattes don't exist at our store. You tell me you want a 2% latte, I'll nod and smile and you end up with whatever I have left over in my pitcher combined with whatever milk the next latte ordered is getting.
If you're bouncing off the wall and ordering more than 2 shots, you're not getting them.
Conversely, if you're a jerk and ordering half-caf, I'm giving you a heart attack.
When you order at the register, the person there writes your directions on the cup. You don't need to repeat them to me. They're on there. Also, don't change your mind or ask for extras. You wouldn't at Starbucks because they're corporate and scary.
Don't assume that I know what you want when you approach the register and plop your money down. We have between 400-600 transactions in an 8 hour shift and at least 250 of those are People Who Come in Regularly. There's no way in hell that I'm going to remember all those drinks.
Don't ask what's on the flatbreads like I have some secret insight. My eyes are worse than yours, and they are what I'll be using to judge what's on there.
Will I cut your sandwich in half? Maybe, if I like you. Otherwise do it yourself.
Old men: I am not here to stroke your ego or be flirted with.
Young men: I am. Please don't look so frightened.
We don't use thermometers to check milk temperature. Don't ask for a specific degree. If you ask for extra hot, you'll probably get scalded. And don't be sassy and say "not too hot, not too cold." I'm likely to write it on your cup and we'll bitch about you later.
If the you've been standing in line for a long time, don't get to the register and not know what you want. It's also helpful if you tell me the whole name of your drink. Not "short regular" or "12 oz. skinny."
When you are ordering, phrase your order as a question. You are asking for something. And use the word please, preferably more than once.
Wrong: "I'll take a..."
Wrong: "I'll have a...
Wrong: "I want a..."
Right: "May I please have a..."
Right: "Could I please get a..."
Right: "Good morning, I would like a...please"
Try this in other situations, not just when ordering at the coffee shop.
A helpful hint: If you're in a hurry, the drinks to order are Americanos, iced lattes and iced chais.
Breve - pronounced breh vay. Also, made of half and half. That's right, CREAM. Don't order these. No one needs them. Just because you're on the Adkins Diet does not mean that you should consume as much fat as possible.
2% lattes don't exist at our store. You tell me you want a 2% latte, I'll nod and smile and you end up with whatever I have left over in my pitcher combined with whatever milk the next latte ordered is getting.
If you're bouncing off the wall and ordering more than 2 shots, you're not getting them.
Conversely, if you're a jerk and ordering half-caf, I'm giving you a heart attack.
When you order at the register, the person there writes your directions on the cup. You don't need to repeat them to me. They're on there. Also, don't change your mind or ask for extras. You wouldn't at Starbucks because they're corporate and scary.
Don't assume that I know what you want when you approach the register and plop your money down. We have between 400-600 transactions in an 8 hour shift and at least 250 of those are People Who Come in Regularly. There's no way in hell that I'm going to remember all those drinks.
Don't ask what's on the flatbreads like I have some secret insight. My eyes are worse than yours, and they are what I'll be using to judge what's on there.
Will I cut your sandwich in half? Maybe, if I like you. Otherwise do it yourself.
Old men: I am not here to stroke your ego or be flirted with.
Young men: I am. Please don't look so frightened.
We don't use thermometers to check milk temperature. Don't ask for a specific degree. If you ask for extra hot, you'll probably get scalded. And don't be sassy and say "not too hot, not too cold." I'm likely to write it on your cup and we'll bitch about you later.
If the you've been standing in line for a long time, don't get to the register and not know what you want. It's also helpful if you tell me the whole name of your drink. Not "short regular" or "12 oz. skinny."
When you are ordering, phrase your order as a question. You are asking for something. And use the word please, preferably more than once.
Wrong: "I'll take a..."
Wrong: "I'll have a...
Wrong: "I want a..."
Right: "May I please have a..."
Right: "Could I please get a..."
Right: "Good morning, I would like a...please"
Try this in other situations, not just when ordering at the coffee shop.
A helpful hint: If you're in a hurry, the drinks to order are Americanos, iced lattes and iced chais.