You're always like that, selfish basta*d!
I've never knew that there'll come a time that you're scared of marriage commitment.
I always thought that when two people love each other, the next phase that we wanted to go is "marriage".
Unfortunately the idea has slipped out from my mind lately, i dont think i'd find anyone that would accept the incoherent me.
That would accept someone that:
--who secretly over excited when she saw her favorite kpop bands comeback.
--but at the sametime trying hard to keep reality in check and stay grounded, close to the reason of her living: her God.
About a month ago, i've received a msg on FB from my ex. It's been 7 years since we last talked to each other.
I remember telling the story of him to my friends when we talked about dating experiences.
He's been always a memory in my head, both good and bad. He's created a benchmark on what type of guy i'd like to have in my life.
However, after more than 10 years of break up, i dont think i'd still have feelings for him. I've moved on.
I mean, i always wonder what he's been up to thesedays but its just a nice feeling to know of his whereabouts. Thats all.
So when he reconnected last month, it didnt feel like "cinta lama berputik kembali", its just a great feeling of seeing your bestfriend after such a long time. And feels nostalgic that nothing has changed.
I asked him what is the purpose of him contacting me back? He said he had no other intention. He just wanted to know if im doing alright, thats all. So i said "okay, then i'll treat you like how i normally treat my other guy friend. No string attached." Period.
Couple of days later i've received another msg from him, he asked me if he can changed his mind? And asking me to marry him.
I was really shocked to be honest. Yeah, its true that we've had a thing before but both of us had moved on since then and he even got married and had a child!
How can he just met his past girlfriend and expecting the feeling is still there? That's really weird and ridiculous.
Please dont decide you're going into a relationship just bcs you're bored! *bricks*
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