(no subject)
Closing distance (repost)
Pairings: Minho/Taemin, slight Jinki/Kibum
Rating: NC-17
Summary: Caught up in the whirlwind of the entertainment business, Minho and Taemin lost sight of each other.
It came out of nowhere - Lee Taemin of SHINee had grown up.
He was no longer the skinny boy with a bowl cut, blinking his eyes far too often when nervous and smiling awkwardly at those that approached him. Taemin's dancing skills were constantly improving, he was already named the youngest dance prince in k-pop and he deserved the title. He got more lines in their songs and wasn’t afraid of singing solos anymore. Besides all that, he was recognized as an all around lovable person by idols and staff all around them after he opened up, sharing his opinions and views of the world.
His progress from a child to a man was amazing, wasn't it?
Well, a certain group member, Choi Minho, wasn't all that crazy about the changes.
Minho still remembered those large doe eyes looking up at him with sincere admiration, respect, and most important: love. In present time, Taemin barely had time for him.
During the rare hours alone, it wasn't the same. There was a tension between them Minho couldn't really break and Taemin seemed unfazed by it. To Minho, it felt like they had somehow went back to being just friends and not even close ones. Taemin either didn’t notice or didn’t care.
It seemed that Taemin had started to keep secrets from Minho, he no longer became over-excited about variety shows and big stages as he used to. Nor was he scared or upset about sasaengs or rude hosts. He was, simply put, like a completely different person.
There were still some occasions, when they locked eyes and the time stopped for them; when Taemin lips curled into the special, familiar smile reserved for only Minho.
As they drifted apart at an alarming speed, those moments became few and far in between.
It was a warm summer evening with blossoms dotting the ground when Kibum asked them to buy some groceries from the nearby convenience store. It was also the day when Minho became aware of Taemin slipping out of his reach.
They were walking hand in hand, side by side, both sweating bullets under the oversized hoodies and caps they were ordered to wear to hide from possible fans. Minho knew he should be grateful for the chance to spend time with his lover, but worries about their future weighed him down.
Taemin tugged his fingers out of Minho’s grasp, his steps light as he playfully jogged ahead of the older. Minho squinted his eyes.
The last rays of sun were blindingly bright and Taemin was running straight into them. For a brief moment, was it an illusion or a trick of the light, it looked as if there was a pair of wings on Taemin’s back.
Soft white angelic wings.
Taemin stopped, standing in the orange hues and staring forward while waiting for Minho to catch up. The sight scared Minho, because it was as if Taemin was preparing to take flight and leave everything behind.
Leave Minho behind.
The rapper felt like breaking into a million pieces as the idea registered in his head. His eyes watered only slightly and he blamed the sunlight. Still, he grabbed hold of his boyfriend’s wrist with desperation, wishing to become his anchor so Taemin vanish into thin air.
“What's wrong, hyung?” Taemin asked softly, glancing over his shoulder. Minho was gazing at him with a frown, his hold on Taemin tight enough to hurt.
He couldn't really see Minho's eyes, hidden behind large designer sunglasses, but it was easy to tell that the rapper was distressed. With a quirk of his lips that was supposed to be reassuring but had the opposite effect, Minho sighed. “Oh, nothing, just remembered something, that's all.”
The man gave Taemin’s hand a squeeze and then dropped it as if the teen’s skin burnt his palm. He picked up a faster pace, pushing past Taemin as his own fears and insecurities became an intolerable ache in his chest.
He never saw the hurt and bafflement in Taemin’s knitted brows.
See, Minho was totally unaware of his own transformation.
Ever since Taemin became more active in the entertainment industry, Minho felt like he should be at least as known as his lover is. So that it was impossible for Taemin to dump him for someone more talented, or witty, or famous.
It was in “Idol Army” when he found that he actually had a pretty good sense of humor under all that shyness, so he decided to put that to use. Soon, he was flirting and cracking jokes on Star King and many other shows, showing off his connections with their sunbaes whenever he could.
He failed to notice how jealous and disappointed his behavior made Taemin. Since Minho kept a distance from him, Taemin was pretty afraid that the rapper might've found someone with more experience and talent, someone prettier and... Not him.
But as the maknae of SHINee, he was told to show a more manlier, independent side of him, so Taemin kept a straight face and hid his feelings.
Due to that, Minho thought he wasn't still trying hard enough and Taemin had already stopped caring.
Taemin, too, felt like Minho was moving out his reach. All of a sudden, the rapper became outgoing and talkative. The distance between them kept growing and growing until their eyes would hardly meet. The part of Minho only Taemin had known was now displayed for the whole world to see. Minho kept running forward, away. The lithe dancer was already going out of his mind to catch up.
Kibum often scolded him for overworking himself when he limped back to their dorm after midnight, his whole body in pain. The “umma” of the group reminded him that Minho loved him for who he was and that Taemin should stop trying to impress the rapper, because he already has Minho's love: both heart and soul.
What more would he want?
But Taemin felt he wasn't worthy. That just having it wasn’t enough. In his opinion, he was only burdening Minho with his worries and troubles, nothing but an annoyance.
The ever-mature Minho never complained or whined about their lifestyle the way Taemin did, it was always Taemin clinging onto the older boy, never the other way ‘round. And it was one of the main reasons why Taemin had agreed to act older and more refined - to give Minho a shoulder to lean on.
Not to mention, Taemin wasn’t experienced in love business, Minho was his first. It was difficult to control his giddiness around Minho. The need to touch him in some way, babble about something meaningless was overwhelming, yet the man avoided Taemin’s searching eyes. His whole body language was screaming “stay away.”
All Taemin wanted was to be attractive, talented and versatile, to make Minho love him again.
So there they were, caught up between practices and rehearsals, both terrified of losing one-another, yet incapable of taking action.
One night, not long after their shopping trip, sleeping alone in the bed he had shared with Taemin, Minho decided he had enough. He missed Taemin's warmth and couldn’t relax, but boy sleeping on the only other bed in the room was calm and still, unbothered.
Taemin no longer crawled under Minho’s blankets at the crack of dawn, lips sleep-swollen and movements uncoordinated, pressing his nose into Minho’s neck before dozing off.
Minho laid awake on his mattress, staring up at the ceiling as the realization that he had to let Taemin go hit him with full force.
He saw the dancer as a graceful butterfly, ready to spread it's wings and fly far-far away, to immeasurable heights. If you love him, let him go, the saying goes. The painful situation, the space between them, it was pure torture for Minho and he wasn't masochistic enough to tolerate it any longer.
A few months ago, Taemin's bed had been practically abandoned, since the owner of said bed had only rested well when he was safely tucked in Minho's arms.
And now it was time to put an end to this.
The man stretched his arms over his head, telling himself to ponder about this on the following morning. Then Taemin mumbled something and Minho stilled in hopes of understanding what the teen said. He didn’t. When Taemin whimpered, Minho wished to just climb out of his bed and calm the restless teen by holding him close, nuzzling into soft auburn hair.
Instead of giving into his urges, Minho turned to face the wall and willed himself to sleep.
---
Two days later they finally had a proper face-off.
Jonghyun was at some late rehearsal and Kibum and Jinki had sneaked out on a date. Neither Taemin or Minho had any plans or schedules, so they had the dorm to themselves.
At first, Taemin watched some boring TV-drama and Minho wasted time in their bedroom, reading a book one of his hyungs recommended him. Over an hour was spent, separated by walls, until Minho couldn’t ignore the ache in his chest any longer.
This weird but painful charade had lasted long enough, he told himself, placing the novel on his bedside table and joining Taemin in the living room.
But as he plopped down on the couch next to his so-called lover, the heartfelt speech he had prepared flew from his mind.Taemin was totally immersed in watching TV and Minho couldn't help but to wonder if the teen was even aware of his presence.
“Taemin-ah.”
“Ne?” the teen asked absentmindedly, eyes remaining glued on the screen.
“Taemin-ah.” the rapper tried again. This time he received no reply. Or so he thought, not noticing the way Taemin's hands curled into fists. Minho talking to him in a serious tone could not mean anything good. “Taeminnie.”
“Ne, hyung?” Taemin finally spared Minho some attention.
He tried to look as unaffected and composed as possible, even with his pulse speeding up with anxiety.
“I think we should talk.” In the dim light, Minho couldn’t read Taemin’s expressions, didn’t see the fear. “Or course, Minho-hyung. About what?”
“Taemin-ah.”
“Ne?”
Minho had practiced pretty words explaining how depressed he was and how lonely he had been lately, how much it hurt to see Taemin flying, while his feet were stuck in the ground.
Nervous as he was, he skipped all of that and blurted out a plain “let's break up.”
“...”
With his gaze trained on the younger, Minho waited for a reaction, any reaction, but Taemin blinked lazily and turned back to his drama. It hurt.
“I’m sorry,” Minho whispered weakly, unable to stand the earsplitting silence and pushing himself off the couch. He had gotten his answer so he left his ex-lover alone.
To Taemin, the world stopped spinning. Everything shattered into pieces in front of his eyes. At first he couldn't comprehend what Minho had just said, the words sounding wrong to his ears. Only several seconds after the door of their room had fallen shut after Minho, the tears started to fall.
His worst nightmares - of Minho not deeming him worthy - came true. He clutched the material of his trousers to stop his hands from shaking and watched as dark little blotches appeared on the fabric.
Minho didn’t want him echoed over and over again in his head and Taemin felt trapped, like all his efforts were in vain.
Afraid of disturbing the rapper's peace with his sobbing, since at that point Taemin was positive he was nothing but a menace to the older teen, Taemin wanted some fresh air to clear his head.
He forgot to take his jacket, turn off the television or clean his face, but he didn’t really notice or care, rushing down the stairs as if his life depended on it.
The streets weren’t busy at that time of night, much to his luck, but he still hung his head low so people wouldn’t see the thick tracks on his cheeks.
There was a park nearby, which Taemin set as his destination after a while of wandering around aimlessly and stumbling on the cracks in the pavement. The street lamps were merciless, but the pedestrians walking by paid him no mind.
The world with its lights and faces passed as a blur, because the source of his strenght wasn’t there for him anymore and fresh tears prickled at the corners of his eyes.
Taemin sat on an old swing which creaked every time it moved and stared at his sneakers, digging the noses into wet sand. He was aware that he didn’t have much time to gather himself together fast, or the others would panic, but he allowed himself just a minute of misery and self-pity.
If only his heart was broken, why did it feel like his whole self was in fragments?
Minho, in the meantime was furiously striding back and forth in their room, having given up on reading since he couldn’t concentrate on anything but what had happened.
This was it, he convinced himself. Taemin would soon fly away. When he heard the maknae leave their apartment, probably to celebrate his new-found freedom, something inside Minho had snapped. He punched the wall so hard that he left a small dent in it. His knuckles hurt, but that was nothing compared to the pain he felt inside.
It's over. This way you won't be hurt when he leaves for real.
Still, Minho regretted clumsily muttering those horrible words. He was baffled - how could such a small phrase destroy something that had taken them years to grow?
His eyes kept straying towards Taemin's empty unmade bed and he couldn’t resist the temptation.
For old times’ sake.
Hesitatingly, he sat down on the edge of the mattress and grabbed Taemin’s favorite pillow. It smelled like the teen’s shampoo, a scent incredibly arousing and comforting to Minho. He laid himself down on the blankets and tried to imagine their lives as strictly only roommates, group mates. Swallowing heavily, Minho wondered if there would be a difference, since things had been strained between them for quite a while.
He stretched himself out, reminiscing about the days when they had hung out in their room, just Minho and Taemin, lazing around and exchanging innocent kisses. He thought about how Taemin's expression had lit up when their eyes met, the way their bodies had fit like puzzle pieces.
Oh no.
Minho stopped himself there, because sulking and reminding himself of all the good times would only make him feel worse. As he placed the pillow back to his original place, his hand touched a hard and smooth square object.
Curiosity got the best of him, so lifted the sheets off just to reveal what seemed to be a large book with thick covers.
It was a photo album.
Looking through the colorful pages, it took him a while to realize he had never seen any of those pictures before. On most of them Taemin wasn't present, so he could tell that the maknae had taken them secretly.
After photos of their pre-debut days, Minho's face started getting more and more frequent on the pages. Minho smiling, being serious, bored, sleepy- all of his expressions were there.
At first, he smiled bitterly at them, but then he reached the last filled pages, on which were rather recent pictures. The latest one seemed to be from only a few days ago, of Minho staring somewhere to his right.
Under some, Taemin had scribbled little messages in the lines of “i miss you,” “hwaiting!” with emoticons and and smileys.
Minho lost every ounce of strength he had in his arms shoved the album back to its hiding place, feeling as if he’d done something awful. Various questions spun around in his head - why, had Taemin been watching him, had Taemin been supporting him all along?
What if all this was all just a misunderstanding?
Hope bubbled up in his chest as fled the dorm in search for confirmation, only pausing to pull on some shoes and a warm sweater.
Out in the cold, Minho looked around desperately, racking his brain where Taemin could’ve gone. He knew the teen. He knew him better than he knew himself. He loved Taemin.
The park!
His breathing was heavy and his throat burned from forcibly inhaling chilly air when he got to the patch of green grass near their dorm.
“Taemin!” he called out, squinting to see in the darkness.
Whipping his head around wildly, Minho noticed a person trying to blend into the shadows on the playground. Without hesitation, he sprinted towards the swings, stopping a few feet away to watch the familiar figure calmly swing back and forth. “Taemin?”
The boy ignored him and kept going.
“Taemin.” Minho stepped closer. “Look at me, Taemin.”
When Taemin didn’t acknowledge Minho’s presence, he rapper cupped his chin, forcing Taemin's eyes to meet his. “Just please... Look at me.” Minho voice broke, seeing his love's swollen eyes.
“Taemin.”
Minho had never hated himself as much as he did then, for being the one that had made the dancer cry. Startled, he took in the teen’s appearance and wrapped his arms around him hastily, because Taemin was freezing in his thin t-shirt and jeans.
“Taemin...” he chanted, as if that name was the only thing he knew, holding the dancer close. Minho smiled softly, feeling lighter than air when Taemin hiccuped, his arms limp at his sides.
“Taemin... Oh, Taemin...” hearing his name fall from those sinfully plump lips, weakened the defenses Taemin had hurriedly put up, when Minho approached him. He was exhausted from the emotions, the running and shaking from the cold.
Giving in was his only option, so he did, numb fingers clutching onto the back of Minho’s jacket as Taemin all but dove into his embrace.
Minho felt like they were flying.
Together.
He wished to enjoy the moment of wholeness, but Taemin shivered, lips purplish, and Minho was worried for his health. Thus, he helped the teen stand up and was more than happy when Taemin leaned onto him for support.
They still hadn't talked things through, but that could wait. Warming Taemin up was more important.
The rapper pretty much carried Taemin up the stairs, silently thanking god that their group-members were yet to return. Hearing the teen cough, Minho didn't waste any time and headed straight to the bathroom, gently settling Taemin down on the toilet before filling up the tub with hot water.
Even though he was seriously concerned, Minho was elated to able to baby the one he adored.
Taemin’s head was pounding. He barely noticed the older boy helping him out of his clothes, but the hot water woke up his senses. It felt like pins and needles against his skin, but he gritted his teeth, understanding that it was for the best.
Between sneezing and scratching at his frost-bitten thighs, Taemin tried to figure out why Minho was stripping his own shirt and trousers off.
In a minute, he got his answer as a toned body slid next to his own and a pair of strong arms circled his naked waist. The touch was familiar, and Taemin shifted closer to MInho on autopilot. Rough fingertips brushed over his cheeks to clean up his face, then smooth palms slid all over his body to help speed up his blood circulation.
Taemin felt perfectly content with his head tucked under Minho's chin, gazing sleepily at the boring white wall in front of them.
“Taemin.”
The teen twisted his neck to look at Minho's face. He was sitting between the rapper's legs, feeling like the most protected and cherished person in the world. “Ne?”
“Taemin... Do you love me?”
That was all Minho needed to know. He was willing to overlook all his suspicions, hesitations and fears if Taemin said yes. Because after all the drama, he couldn’t deny the way he felt at home with Taemin curled up against him.
“I do, hyung.”
Taemin muttered quietly, entwining their fingers and Minho wasn't sure if he heard it right. “What was that, Taeminnie?”
Instead of repeating himself, Taemin grabbed the sides of the bathtub and flipped himself around, kneeling in the warm water in front of Minho to face him. He used this new position to his advantage and before Minho could voice his discontent at space between their bodies, Taemin cupped his face and pressed their mouths together.
It started innocent childlike kiss, just lips against lips, but the fact that they were both naked heated it up. It also helped that it had been a while since they last had any physical contact with each other. Being teenagers, it was only natural to get aroused by the closeness.
Minho licked Taemin's swollen lips hesitatingly before slipping his tongue inside the wet cavern, pulling the boy into him. Taemin sat on Minho’s thighs awkwardly, tilting his head to give Minho better access and the freedom to do as he pleased.
Warming Taemin up had become so much more and it wasn't long before Minho had the dancer pinned down, the younger's head barely over the water-line.
Hovering above Taemin, the rapper felt like a predator, unable to tame himself near his prey. Minho checked his lover out shamelessly, enjoying the view and making sure Taemin knew it. He lowered himself onto Taemin carefully, careful not to crush the teen’s lithe body under his weight.
Taemin's cheeks were flushed, his hair messy and eyes closed. Minho couldn’t help but to stare as Taemin bit into his fat lower lip expectantly.“Look at me,” he ordered.
Their eyes met and that moment the tension and uncertainties melted away. They wanted this.
Minho wanted to kissed Taemin softly, to worship him and re-discover each part of his body slowly, but as the hormones got the best of him, he grew needier, rougher. Taemin didn’t mind, his hands finding their way into Minho’s hair, tugging gently to encourage him.
Being with Taemin was always exhilarating and addicting for Minho. They weren't even doing anything too sexual yet, plainly kissing and touching, savoring the foreplay until it became too much.
“Let's have sex.” Taemin whispered needily in between sloppy lip-locks.
“Not sex,” Minho answered, his voice sounding alarmingly breathy and high-pitched while placing butterfly kisses on Taemin's face. Seeing Taemin's questioning-scared stare, he smiled like an idiot in love.
“I wanna make love to you.”
He knew those words were corny as hell, and he even felt embarrassed after letting them slip, but the heavenly smile on Taemin's ravished lips was worth it.
Minho untangled himself from Taemin and parted those long milky legs so that they could become one, like they both so badly desired. Taemin's hands clutched at his shoulders, trusting him, but making sure he wouldn’t be able to leave. Not that Minho was capable of leaving with Taemin in front of him, flushed and desperate.
The rapper let his hands run freely, his fingertips still remembering the places that make Taemin lose his control and emit pleased moans. It was a miracle that after the long while of not being able to be with his lover, Minho had some self-restraint and didn’t attack the teen.
He kept stroking up and down Taemin's stomach as he reached over the edge of the tub to grab one of the bottles of lotion Kibum always kept there. Most of the time, everyone was annoyed by the numerous cosmetic products, gels and bottles scattered around the bathroom, but occasionally it was rather useful.
While Minho was having difficulties opening the tap of the creamy gel, Taemin wriggled, pushing their pelvises together. He looked embarrassed for his actions, which made Minho wonder if Taemin knew just how irresistible, delectable, delicious he looked.
Placing the long legs everyone admired but only he got to touch around his waist and looking down, Minho gulped. He was never a religious man but the sight made him want go to church and donate a few millions. Damn, he must have done something right in his previous life to deserve this.
Minho prepared his lover patiently and by the concentrated expression Taemin wore, he knew that he was right about Taemin not having touched himself much since the last time they were together. It was going to be uncomfortable for him, in the beginning at least, so the fact that the dancer wanted to go through with this with him filled Minho with pride and warmth.
When Taemin started to get vocal, writhing under him and thrusting back, Minho became restless.
“Are you okay?” he asked cautiously while taking his place between Taemin's thighs and coating his length with the slimy strawberry-scented cream. Taemin gave him a slight smile. The special one, full of shy happiness.
Minho pushed in slowly, dragging their bodies together and throwing his head back in ecstasy. Nothing could compare to being with Taemin. No one could ever be better than him.
Taemin arched his back, and Minho slid into him deeper, finding the spot that made him whimper in pleasure.
Their pace got faster, touches got hurried, Minho felt himself losing bits of his sanity. He held onto Taemin's hips hard enough to leave bruises, hastily, desperately needing the friction. Both of them panted heavily, almost in sync yet far from being satisfied.
Minho sucked hickeys on the smooth expanse of Taemin’s neck, claiming the boy as his just as he was Taemin’s.
Their groans and grunts echoed in the small tiled room as Taemin reached his climax. Minho felt the teen’s inner muscles tighten around him and sloppily jerked the Taemin’s cock, already glistening with pre-cum. Taemin's eyes rolled backwards and he held onto Minho as tight as he could, leaving nail marks on the man’s torso when white bliss finally hit him and he came.
The tensing and pulsating of Taemin's body felt incredibly good so Minho followed soon after, emptying himself into the dancer. Minho took his sweet time to ride out his orgasm, whispering nothings into his ear before sliding his still semi-hard cock out of Taemin's ass and collapsing on top of the teen.
Naturally, Minho's arms found their way around Taemin and he cradled the teen close, wowing to himself never to let Taemin go again as they stabilized their breathing.
They stayed unmoving for a while, Minho’s face pressed into Taemin’s hair, until the little minx leaned up to speak into his ear, purposely hitting the sensitive earlobe with his moist breath.
“The water's cold.”
Minho swore to himself, having forgotten about his mission of warming Taemin up. He dragged them out of the lukewarm water and insisted on drying Taemin off with the fluffiest towel he could find, while the teen just stood there and let Minho pamper him. Afterwards, ignoring Taemin’s surprise yelps, Minho picked him up princess style and playfully took him to their room.
Taemin, of course, struggled and whined half-heartedly, grumbling about not being a girl, but he didn’t make a move to escape the hold.
Placing Taemin on his bed, Minho contemplated about bringing up the photo album and clearing up the possible misunderstanding. But seeing the pout on Taemin’s lips as the boy wrestled with the sheets to wrap them around his naked body, Minho couldn't bring himself to ruin the moment.
Ridding himself of the towel he had tied around his waist, Minho stood before Taemin in all his naked glory, the smile on his face somewhat troubled.
Taemin made him some room, rolling over to his side as an invitation and Minho slipped under the covers, sighing contently.As soon as the rapper was comfortably lying down, his hands searched for Taemin, grabbing him by the hips and pulling him close.
Unlike on those awful nights they slept on their own respective beds, Taemin relaxed immediately, listening to the soft beating of Minho's heart and letting it lull him to sleep.
A few hours later, they were woken up by screaming. A disturbingly familiar voice was screeching at the top of his lugs:
“I cannot believe it! Jinki, dear, look! We go out for one night and they make such a mess in the bathroom! Poor Jjong was so shocked he had to go to the neighbor's just to take a piss! They even left water in the tub! Omo- is that jizz floating in it?! Aah! My favorite moisturizer! What have they done?!”
The loud stomping came closer to the room in which the two lovebirds were stirring from their deep slumber. Taemin grinned at Minho sleepily, and Minho feared for his life (or worse, his dick), hearing his name being called.
“Minho~?!” Kibum barged into their room with a horrifyingly fake smile on his face which couldn’t mean anything good. What was even worse - Kibum had a spatula in his hand that had never looked quite as deadly.
But the scary expression transformed into a look of curiosity when Kibum saw the couple cuddling in bed. Taemin looked happy, which made Kibum happy, since his best friend had been depressed for long weeks. Kibum had been close to giving Minho a proper earful for making the boy sad and only Taemin’s pleads had stopped him.
“You guys, uh- made up?”
Taemin giggled at Kibum’s shock, Minho was uncertain- were his balls no longer in danger?
The rapper looked down at Taemin, blissfully snuggled up to him and his lips curled up as he hoped that from then on, he could wake up like that every morning (without Kibum's screaming, of course).
“Oh, oka-ay.” Kibum said slowly, staring at them uncertainly. Minho ruffled Taemin's hair and chuckled, when the teen let out a small mewl. Kibum’s anger dissolved. What could he do- seeing Taemin smile sincerely was like a weight had been lifted from his chest.
Kibum sighed, hiding a small smile of his own. “Well then. I’m giving you two half an hour. Then I expect you, Minho, to clean the bathroom,” Kibum told them sternly, putting all the blame on the rapper before leaving the pair alone.
Minho watched soft morning light play on his lover's hair and huffed. He hated himself for it, but there were still some issues left unsettled. “Taeminnie?”
The teen didn't look up from where he was toying with Minho's nipple, an activity which Minho found very distracting “Yeah?”
“Why do you have that album?”
Minho immediately felt the small body in his arms stiffen and he held onto Taemin tighter. He felt more than heard a sigh leave Taemin's lungs, but no words escaped just yet.
“Well...” The teen finally started. “I've always liked to take pictures, you know. So that I don't miss or forget anything or anyone. I guess, that's why?”
The tone he used was light and easy, but with a tinge of guilt. Minho frowned, sitting up so that he could look his lover in the eyes. “I think you know what I meant.” he said sadly, still holding Taemin close, but carefully observing the changes in his body language.
“You avoided me.” it was a simple statement, but it shook the ground under Minho, whose eyes widened with incomprehension. “I avoided you? I think it was the other way around. You were always so busy, always doing something new and meeting new people.”
The barely concealed jealousy was audible in Minho’s shaking voice. Taemin laid his head on Minho's shoulder and rested a hand on the rapper's heart to satiate him.
“Well, If you want the truth, I-I just wanted you to look at me.”
“Huh? But- I'm always looking at you! What are you talking about?”
Taemin sighed, rubbing soothing circles into the rapper’s chest. Minho looked down at him pleadingly, begging for explanations.
“You're always so far away. So strong. So good to anyone. Me, too, of course. But you don't tell about your troubles and issues to anyone. And I kind of thought I was troubling you, always being like a clingy baby. So I thought that if I became a better Taemin, someone you could be proud of, someone you could lean on, not just someone who's way too dependent, can't handle himself, and-”
“Ssh.” Minho said, rocking them back and forth as he sensed Taemin getting upset. He never wanted to make Taemin cry again. “You know, baby. I've never thought of you that way.”
“Then why were you getting all distant?” Taemin inquired, the words slightly muffled by Minho's shoulder, as he pressed himself as close as it was humanly possible, holding on as if he was the one scared of the other disappearing.
“I thought you were going to leave me.”
“Wha-” Minho didn't let him interrupt. He needed to get it off his chest, then or never.
“Have you looked at yourself in the mirror lately, Minnie? You- You're, well, beautiful, talented, amazing, hard-working, cute, awesome at everything you do. You have so many skills and you're not afraid of trying anything new. You were suddenly, just, everywhere. Doing so many things. Developing so fast, that my head started spinning. Taemin, I'm just a normal guy. I don't have super powers. When you outgrow me, I won't be able to catch up with you. I just, uh, don't want you to go...”
Taemin hugged Minho without saying anything and Minho knew he got his message across. The dancer's smooth palms were on him, moving without a destination, just assuring him that it is real, that Taemin was with him and not planning to go anywhere.
Then Taemin lifted his head to meet Minho's eyes. Those large orbs, filled to the brim with innocence and happiness had pearly tears in the corners. He was smiling.
“Funny, I was thinking almost the same thing. You were suddenly so carefree and letting people in so easily. I thought you were the one trying to leave me behind.”
They kept the eye-contact, conveying messages of reassurance which couldn’t be put into words. Then, as the mood in the room eased, Taemin started making childish faces. He was gleeful. They were okay. Minho loved him.
The older boy snorted and mumbled something about “Taemin's fantastic elastic face”, before diving deep under the covers and taking Taemin with him.
“You silly boy” Minho mumbled into the maknae's hair, not ready to leave the warmth of the sheets yet “Don't you ever doubt in my love.”
“But you have to tell me stuff, too, okay?” Taemin demanded, pouting. Minho laughed, amused by his lover's...Indeed, his lover's bratty antics. “Yeah, okay, whenever I get scared of ghosts, you'll be the first to know.”
“Hey! Hyung, that's not fair! Why are you like this?”
Minho wondered if they could get away with a morning quickie, now that their troubles had turned into dust and Taemin was hot and naked, in bed with him.
The dancer play-punched Minho for not paying attention and zoning off. Minho was just about to pin Taemin under him, ravish him until he squealed, when someone knocked on the door timidly.
Jonghyun poked his head into the room, keeping his eyes trained on the floor in fear of seeing something he’d rather not witness.
“Um, guys? Could you clean up the bathroom now? I would really appreciate a shower. And Kibum says breakfast is ready and-”
Minho threw the closest thing- which happened to be a dirty sock- at Jonghyun to get him out. After their door closed, he planned to curl around Taemin once more and continue what had been started, but the smal teen easily slid out of his reach.
“Wha? Where'ya going?” Minho asked, a chill sneaking under the sheets when Taemin crawled out of bed.. The dancer gave him a wicked smile, before blowing a kiss and pulling on some nice tight boxers. Minho appreciated the view, of course.
“You can sleep. I'll go fetch some breakfast. You want me to bring you some?” Taemin asked innocently, slipping into one of Minho's old T-shirts. It was large for Minho, thus huge for Taemin, but he looked endearingly adorable and very much owned by Minho so he didn’t mind.
“I could just eat you...”
“Okay, breakfast in bed it is.” Taemin suggested with a wink, ignoring Minho's perverted offer and twirling around to leave the room. Minho couldn't help but stare, and not just because Taemin looked damn cute.
The rapper smiled to himself, stretching out his muscles and grinning, recalling the reason why he was so sore. Soon, Taemin would return to his side and Minho would bribe the teen to mouth-feed him.
Their lives would go on. Together. And that one moment when Taemin was standing there with his back towards Minho, just before he opened the door, would be etched into Minho’s memory for years.
Because Taemin had no wings.
a/n: while this i definitely not the best fanfic i've ever written, it's still very important to me and i'd go as far as to say that it holds a special place in my heart, since it was the first fic i ever wrote in this fandom about three years ago. this is an edited version - i changed the wording a bit, cut some unnecessary parts and fixed some mistakes, but tried my best to keep the story line and its awkwardness as it was.
i guess it shows how much i've grown during the years. ^^
Pairings: Minho/Taemin, slight Jinki/Kibum
Rating: NC-17
Summary: Caught up in the whirlwind of the entertainment business, Minho and Taemin lost sight of each other.
It came out of nowhere - Lee Taemin of SHINee had grown up.
He was no longer the skinny boy with a bowl cut, blinking his eyes far too often when nervous and smiling awkwardly at those that approached him. Taemin's dancing skills were constantly improving, he was already named the youngest dance prince in k-pop and he deserved the title. He got more lines in their songs and wasn’t afraid of singing solos anymore. Besides all that, he was recognized as an all around lovable person by idols and staff all around them after he opened up, sharing his opinions and views of the world.
His progress from a child to a man was amazing, wasn't it?
Well, a certain group member, Choi Minho, wasn't all that crazy about the changes.
Minho still remembered those large doe eyes looking up at him with sincere admiration, respect, and most important: love. In present time, Taemin barely had time for him.
During the rare hours alone, it wasn't the same. There was a tension between them Minho couldn't really break and Taemin seemed unfazed by it. To Minho, it felt like they had somehow went back to being just friends and not even close ones. Taemin either didn’t notice or didn’t care.
It seemed that Taemin had started to keep secrets from Minho, he no longer became over-excited about variety shows and big stages as he used to. Nor was he scared or upset about sasaengs or rude hosts. He was, simply put, like a completely different person.
There were still some occasions, when they locked eyes and the time stopped for them; when Taemin lips curled into the special, familiar smile reserved for only Minho.
As they drifted apart at an alarming speed, those moments became few and far in between.
It was a warm summer evening with blossoms dotting the ground when Kibum asked them to buy some groceries from the nearby convenience store. It was also the day when Minho became aware of Taemin slipping out of his reach.
They were walking hand in hand, side by side, both sweating bullets under the oversized hoodies and caps they were ordered to wear to hide from possible fans. Minho knew he should be grateful for the chance to spend time with his lover, but worries about their future weighed him down.
Taemin tugged his fingers out of Minho’s grasp, his steps light as he playfully jogged ahead of the older. Minho squinted his eyes.
The last rays of sun were blindingly bright and Taemin was running straight into them. For a brief moment, was it an illusion or a trick of the light, it looked as if there was a pair of wings on Taemin’s back.
Soft white angelic wings.
Taemin stopped, standing in the orange hues and staring forward while waiting for Minho to catch up. The sight scared Minho, because it was as if Taemin was preparing to take flight and leave everything behind.
Leave Minho behind.
The rapper felt like breaking into a million pieces as the idea registered in his head. His eyes watered only slightly and he blamed the sunlight. Still, he grabbed hold of his boyfriend’s wrist with desperation, wishing to become his anchor so Taemin vanish into thin air.
“What's wrong, hyung?” Taemin asked softly, glancing over his shoulder. Minho was gazing at him with a frown, his hold on Taemin tight enough to hurt.
He couldn't really see Minho's eyes, hidden behind large designer sunglasses, but it was easy to tell that the rapper was distressed. With a quirk of his lips that was supposed to be reassuring but had the opposite effect, Minho sighed. “Oh, nothing, just remembered something, that's all.”
The man gave Taemin’s hand a squeeze and then dropped it as if the teen’s skin burnt his palm. He picked up a faster pace, pushing past Taemin as his own fears and insecurities became an intolerable ache in his chest.
He never saw the hurt and bafflement in Taemin’s knitted brows.
See, Minho was totally unaware of his own transformation.
Ever since Taemin became more active in the entertainment industry, Minho felt like he should be at least as known as his lover is. So that it was impossible for Taemin to dump him for someone more talented, or witty, or famous.
It was in “Idol Army” when he found that he actually had a pretty good sense of humor under all that shyness, so he decided to put that to use. Soon, he was flirting and cracking jokes on Star King and many other shows, showing off his connections with their sunbaes whenever he could.
He failed to notice how jealous and disappointed his behavior made Taemin. Since Minho kept a distance from him, Taemin was pretty afraid that the rapper might've found someone with more experience and talent, someone prettier and... Not him.
But as the maknae of SHINee, he was told to show a more manlier, independent side of him, so Taemin kept a straight face and hid his feelings.
Due to that, Minho thought he wasn't still trying hard enough and Taemin had already stopped caring.
Taemin, too, felt like Minho was moving out his reach. All of a sudden, the rapper became outgoing and talkative. The distance between them kept growing and growing until their eyes would hardly meet. The part of Minho only Taemin had known was now displayed for the whole world to see. Minho kept running forward, away. The lithe dancer was already going out of his mind to catch up.
Kibum often scolded him for overworking himself when he limped back to their dorm after midnight, his whole body in pain. The “umma” of the group reminded him that Minho loved him for who he was and that Taemin should stop trying to impress the rapper, because he already has Minho's love: both heart and soul.
What more would he want?
But Taemin felt he wasn't worthy. That just having it wasn’t enough. In his opinion, he was only burdening Minho with his worries and troubles, nothing but an annoyance.
The ever-mature Minho never complained or whined about their lifestyle the way Taemin did, it was always Taemin clinging onto the older boy, never the other way ‘round. And it was one of the main reasons why Taemin had agreed to act older and more refined - to give Minho a shoulder to lean on.
Not to mention, Taemin wasn’t experienced in love business, Minho was his first. It was difficult to control his giddiness around Minho. The need to touch him in some way, babble about something meaningless was overwhelming, yet the man avoided Taemin’s searching eyes. His whole body language was screaming “stay away.”
All Taemin wanted was to be attractive, talented and versatile, to make Minho love him again.
So there they were, caught up between practices and rehearsals, both terrified of losing one-another, yet incapable of taking action.
One night, not long after their shopping trip, sleeping alone in the bed he had shared with Taemin, Minho decided he had enough. He missed Taemin's warmth and couldn’t relax, but boy sleeping on the only other bed in the room was calm and still, unbothered.
Taemin no longer crawled under Minho’s blankets at the crack of dawn, lips sleep-swollen and movements uncoordinated, pressing his nose into Minho’s neck before dozing off.
Minho laid awake on his mattress, staring up at the ceiling as the realization that he had to let Taemin go hit him with full force.
He saw the dancer as a graceful butterfly, ready to spread it's wings and fly far-far away, to immeasurable heights. If you love him, let him go, the saying goes. The painful situation, the space between them, it was pure torture for Minho and he wasn't masochistic enough to tolerate it any longer.
A few months ago, Taemin's bed had been practically abandoned, since the owner of said bed had only rested well when he was safely tucked in Minho's arms.
And now it was time to put an end to this.
The man stretched his arms over his head, telling himself to ponder about this on the following morning. Then Taemin mumbled something and Minho stilled in hopes of understanding what the teen said. He didn’t. When Taemin whimpered, Minho wished to just climb out of his bed and calm the restless teen by holding him close, nuzzling into soft auburn hair.
Instead of giving into his urges, Minho turned to face the wall and willed himself to sleep.
---
Two days later they finally had a proper face-off.
Jonghyun was at some late rehearsal and Kibum and Jinki had sneaked out on a date. Neither Taemin or Minho had any plans or schedules, so they had the dorm to themselves.
At first, Taemin watched some boring TV-drama and Minho wasted time in their bedroom, reading a book one of his hyungs recommended him. Over an hour was spent, separated by walls, until Minho couldn’t ignore the ache in his chest any longer.
This weird but painful charade had lasted long enough, he told himself, placing the novel on his bedside table and joining Taemin in the living room.
But as he plopped down on the couch next to his so-called lover, the heartfelt speech he had prepared flew from his mind.Taemin was totally immersed in watching TV and Minho couldn't help but to wonder if the teen was even aware of his presence.
“Taemin-ah.”
“Ne?” the teen asked absentmindedly, eyes remaining glued on the screen.
“Taemin-ah.” the rapper tried again. This time he received no reply. Or so he thought, not noticing the way Taemin's hands curled into fists. Minho talking to him in a serious tone could not mean anything good. “Taeminnie.”
“Ne, hyung?” Taemin finally spared Minho some attention.
He tried to look as unaffected and composed as possible, even with his pulse speeding up with anxiety.
“I think we should talk.” In the dim light, Minho couldn’t read Taemin’s expressions, didn’t see the fear. “Or course, Minho-hyung. About what?”
“Taemin-ah.”
“Ne?”
Minho had practiced pretty words explaining how depressed he was and how lonely he had been lately, how much it hurt to see Taemin flying, while his feet were stuck in the ground.
Nervous as he was, he skipped all of that and blurted out a plain “let's break up.”
“...”
With his gaze trained on the younger, Minho waited for a reaction, any reaction, but Taemin blinked lazily and turned back to his drama. It hurt.
“I’m sorry,” Minho whispered weakly, unable to stand the earsplitting silence and pushing himself off the couch. He had gotten his answer so he left his ex-lover alone.
To Taemin, the world stopped spinning. Everything shattered into pieces in front of his eyes. At first he couldn't comprehend what Minho had just said, the words sounding wrong to his ears. Only several seconds after the door of their room had fallen shut after Minho, the tears started to fall.
His worst nightmares - of Minho not deeming him worthy - came true. He clutched the material of his trousers to stop his hands from shaking and watched as dark little blotches appeared on the fabric.
Minho didn’t want him echoed over and over again in his head and Taemin felt trapped, like all his efforts were in vain.
Afraid of disturbing the rapper's peace with his sobbing, since at that point Taemin was positive he was nothing but a menace to the older teen, Taemin wanted some fresh air to clear his head.
He forgot to take his jacket, turn off the television or clean his face, but he didn’t really notice or care, rushing down the stairs as if his life depended on it.
The streets weren’t busy at that time of night, much to his luck, but he still hung his head low so people wouldn’t see the thick tracks on his cheeks.
There was a park nearby, which Taemin set as his destination after a while of wandering around aimlessly and stumbling on the cracks in the pavement. The street lamps were merciless, but the pedestrians walking by paid him no mind.
The world with its lights and faces passed as a blur, because the source of his strenght wasn’t there for him anymore and fresh tears prickled at the corners of his eyes.
Taemin sat on an old swing which creaked every time it moved and stared at his sneakers, digging the noses into wet sand. He was aware that he didn’t have much time to gather himself together fast, or the others would panic, but he allowed himself just a minute of misery and self-pity.
If only his heart was broken, why did it feel like his whole self was in fragments?
Minho, in the meantime was furiously striding back and forth in their room, having given up on reading since he couldn’t concentrate on anything but what had happened.
This was it, he convinced himself. Taemin would soon fly away. When he heard the maknae leave their apartment, probably to celebrate his new-found freedom, something inside Minho had snapped. He punched the wall so hard that he left a small dent in it. His knuckles hurt, but that was nothing compared to the pain he felt inside.
It's over. This way you won't be hurt when he leaves for real.
Still, Minho regretted clumsily muttering those horrible words. He was baffled - how could such a small phrase destroy something that had taken them years to grow?
His eyes kept straying towards Taemin's empty unmade bed and he couldn’t resist the temptation.
For old times’ sake.
Hesitatingly, he sat down on the edge of the mattress and grabbed Taemin’s favorite pillow. It smelled like the teen’s shampoo, a scent incredibly arousing and comforting to Minho. He laid himself down on the blankets and tried to imagine their lives as strictly only roommates, group mates. Swallowing heavily, Minho wondered if there would be a difference, since things had been strained between them for quite a while.
He stretched himself out, reminiscing about the days when they had hung out in their room, just Minho and Taemin, lazing around and exchanging innocent kisses. He thought about how Taemin's expression had lit up when their eyes met, the way their bodies had fit like puzzle pieces.
Oh no.
Minho stopped himself there, because sulking and reminding himself of all the good times would only make him feel worse. As he placed the pillow back to his original place, his hand touched a hard and smooth square object.
Curiosity got the best of him, so lifted the sheets off just to reveal what seemed to be a large book with thick covers.
It was a photo album.
Looking through the colorful pages, it took him a while to realize he had never seen any of those pictures before. On most of them Taemin wasn't present, so he could tell that the maknae had taken them secretly.
After photos of their pre-debut days, Minho's face started getting more and more frequent on the pages. Minho smiling, being serious, bored, sleepy- all of his expressions were there.
At first, he smiled bitterly at them, but then he reached the last filled pages, on which were rather recent pictures. The latest one seemed to be from only a few days ago, of Minho staring somewhere to his right.
Under some, Taemin had scribbled little messages in the lines of “i miss you,” “hwaiting!” with emoticons and and smileys.
Minho lost every ounce of strength he had in his arms shoved the album back to its hiding place, feeling as if he’d done something awful. Various questions spun around in his head - why, had Taemin been watching him, had Taemin been supporting him all along?
What if all this was all just a misunderstanding?
Hope bubbled up in his chest as fled the dorm in search for confirmation, only pausing to pull on some shoes and a warm sweater.
Out in the cold, Minho looked around desperately, racking his brain where Taemin could’ve gone. He knew the teen. He knew him better than he knew himself. He loved Taemin.
The park!
His breathing was heavy and his throat burned from forcibly inhaling chilly air when he got to the patch of green grass near their dorm.
“Taemin!” he called out, squinting to see in the darkness.
Whipping his head around wildly, Minho noticed a person trying to blend into the shadows on the playground. Without hesitation, he sprinted towards the swings, stopping a few feet away to watch the familiar figure calmly swing back and forth. “Taemin?”
The boy ignored him and kept going.
“Taemin.” Minho stepped closer. “Look at me, Taemin.”
When Taemin didn’t acknowledge Minho’s presence, he rapper cupped his chin, forcing Taemin's eyes to meet his. “Just please... Look at me.” Minho voice broke, seeing his love's swollen eyes.
“Taemin.”
Minho had never hated himself as much as he did then, for being the one that had made the dancer cry. Startled, he took in the teen’s appearance and wrapped his arms around him hastily, because Taemin was freezing in his thin t-shirt and jeans.
“Taemin...” he chanted, as if that name was the only thing he knew, holding the dancer close. Minho smiled softly, feeling lighter than air when Taemin hiccuped, his arms limp at his sides.
“Taemin... Oh, Taemin...” hearing his name fall from those sinfully plump lips, weakened the defenses Taemin had hurriedly put up, when Minho approached him. He was exhausted from the emotions, the running and shaking from the cold.
Giving in was his only option, so he did, numb fingers clutching onto the back of Minho’s jacket as Taemin all but dove into his embrace.
Minho felt like they were flying.
Together.
He wished to enjoy the moment of wholeness, but Taemin shivered, lips purplish, and Minho was worried for his health. Thus, he helped the teen stand up and was more than happy when Taemin leaned onto him for support.
They still hadn't talked things through, but that could wait. Warming Taemin up was more important.
The rapper pretty much carried Taemin up the stairs, silently thanking god that their group-members were yet to return. Hearing the teen cough, Minho didn't waste any time and headed straight to the bathroom, gently settling Taemin down on the toilet before filling up the tub with hot water.
Even though he was seriously concerned, Minho was elated to able to baby the one he adored.
Taemin’s head was pounding. He barely noticed the older boy helping him out of his clothes, but the hot water woke up his senses. It felt like pins and needles against his skin, but he gritted his teeth, understanding that it was for the best.
Between sneezing and scratching at his frost-bitten thighs, Taemin tried to figure out why Minho was stripping his own shirt and trousers off.
In a minute, he got his answer as a toned body slid next to his own and a pair of strong arms circled his naked waist. The touch was familiar, and Taemin shifted closer to MInho on autopilot. Rough fingertips brushed over his cheeks to clean up his face, then smooth palms slid all over his body to help speed up his blood circulation.
Taemin felt perfectly content with his head tucked under Minho's chin, gazing sleepily at the boring white wall in front of them.
“Taemin.”
The teen twisted his neck to look at Minho's face. He was sitting between the rapper's legs, feeling like the most protected and cherished person in the world. “Ne?”
“Taemin... Do you love me?”
That was all Minho needed to know. He was willing to overlook all his suspicions, hesitations and fears if Taemin said yes. Because after all the drama, he couldn’t deny the way he felt at home with Taemin curled up against him.
“I do, hyung.”
Taemin muttered quietly, entwining their fingers and Minho wasn't sure if he heard it right. “What was that, Taeminnie?”
Instead of repeating himself, Taemin grabbed the sides of the bathtub and flipped himself around, kneeling in the warm water in front of Minho to face him. He used this new position to his advantage and before Minho could voice his discontent at space between their bodies, Taemin cupped his face and pressed their mouths together.
It started innocent childlike kiss, just lips against lips, but the fact that they were both naked heated it up. It also helped that it had been a while since they last had any physical contact with each other. Being teenagers, it was only natural to get aroused by the closeness.
Minho licked Taemin's swollen lips hesitatingly before slipping his tongue inside the wet cavern, pulling the boy into him. Taemin sat on Minho’s thighs awkwardly, tilting his head to give Minho better access and the freedom to do as he pleased.
Warming Taemin up had become so much more and it wasn't long before Minho had the dancer pinned down, the younger's head barely over the water-line.
Hovering above Taemin, the rapper felt like a predator, unable to tame himself near his prey. Minho checked his lover out shamelessly, enjoying the view and making sure Taemin knew it. He lowered himself onto Taemin carefully, careful not to crush the teen’s lithe body under his weight.
Taemin's cheeks were flushed, his hair messy and eyes closed. Minho couldn’t help but to stare as Taemin bit into his fat lower lip expectantly.“Look at me,” he ordered.
Their eyes met and that moment the tension and uncertainties melted away. They wanted this.
Minho wanted to kissed Taemin softly, to worship him and re-discover each part of his body slowly, but as the hormones got the best of him, he grew needier, rougher. Taemin didn’t mind, his hands finding their way into Minho’s hair, tugging gently to encourage him.
Being with Taemin was always exhilarating and addicting for Minho. They weren't even doing anything too sexual yet, plainly kissing and touching, savoring the foreplay until it became too much.
“Let's have sex.” Taemin whispered needily in between sloppy lip-locks.
“Not sex,” Minho answered, his voice sounding alarmingly breathy and high-pitched while placing butterfly kisses on Taemin's face. Seeing Taemin's questioning-scared stare, he smiled like an idiot in love.
“I wanna make love to you.”
He knew those words were corny as hell, and he even felt embarrassed after letting them slip, but the heavenly smile on Taemin's ravished lips was worth it.
Minho untangled himself from Taemin and parted those long milky legs so that they could become one, like they both so badly desired. Taemin's hands clutched at his shoulders, trusting him, but making sure he wouldn’t be able to leave. Not that Minho was capable of leaving with Taemin in front of him, flushed and desperate.
The rapper let his hands run freely, his fingertips still remembering the places that make Taemin lose his control and emit pleased moans. It was a miracle that after the long while of not being able to be with his lover, Minho had some self-restraint and didn’t attack the teen.
He kept stroking up and down Taemin's stomach as he reached over the edge of the tub to grab one of the bottles of lotion Kibum always kept there. Most of the time, everyone was annoyed by the numerous cosmetic products, gels and bottles scattered around the bathroom, but occasionally it was rather useful.
While Minho was having difficulties opening the tap of the creamy gel, Taemin wriggled, pushing their pelvises together. He looked embarrassed for his actions, which made Minho wonder if Taemin knew just how irresistible, delectable, delicious he looked.
Placing the long legs everyone admired but only he got to touch around his waist and looking down, Minho gulped. He was never a religious man but the sight made him want go to church and donate a few millions. Damn, he must have done something right in his previous life to deserve this.
Minho prepared his lover patiently and by the concentrated expression Taemin wore, he knew that he was right about Taemin not having touched himself much since the last time they were together. It was going to be uncomfortable for him, in the beginning at least, so the fact that the dancer wanted to go through with this with him filled Minho with pride and warmth.
When Taemin started to get vocal, writhing under him and thrusting back, Minho became restless.
“Are you okay?” he asked cautiously while taking his place between Taemin's thighs and coating his length with the slimy strawberry-scented cream. Taemin gave him a slight smile. The special one, full of shy happiness.
Minho pushed in slowly, dragging their bodies together and throwing his head back in ecstasy. Nothing could compare to being with Taemin. No one could ever be better than him.
Taemin arched his back, and Minho slid into him deeper, finding the spot that made him whimper in pleasure.
Their pace got faster, touches got hurried, Minho felt himself losing bits of his sanity. He held onto Taemin's hips hard enough to leave bruises, hastily, desperately needing the friction. Both of them panted heavily, almost in sync yet far from being satisfied.
Minho sucked hickeys on the smooth expanse of Taemin’s neck, claiming the boy as his just as he was Taemin’s.
Their groans and grunts echoed in the small tiled room as Taemin reached his climax. Minho felt the teen’s inner muscles tighten around him and sloppily jerked the Taemin’s cock, already glistening with pre-cum. Taemin's eyes rolled backwards and he held onto Minho as tight as he could, leaving nail marks on the man’s torso when white bliss finally hit him and he came.
The tensing and pulsating of Taemin's body felt incredibly good so Minho followed soon after, emptying himself into the dancer. Minho took his sweet time to ride out his orgasm, whispering nothings into his ear before sliding his still semi-hard cock out of Taemin's ass and collapsing on top of the teen.
Naturally, Minho's arms found their way around Taemin and he cradled the teen close, wowing to himself never to let Taemin go again as they stabilized their breathing.
They stayed unmoving for a while, Minho’s face pressed into Taemin’s hair, until the little minx leaned up to speak into his ear, purposely hitting the sensitive earlobe with his moist breath.
“The water's cold.”
Minho swore to himself, having forgotten about his mission of warming Taemin up. He dragged them out of the lukewarm water and insisted on drying Taemin off with the fluffiest towel he could find, while the teen just stood there and let Minho pamper him. Afterwards, ignoring Taemin’s surprise yelps, Minho picked him up princess style and playfully took him to their room.
Taemin, of course, struggled and whined half-heartedly, grumbling about not being a girl, but he didn’t make a move to escape the hold.
Placing Taemin on his bed, Minho contemplated about bringing up the photo album and clearing up the possible misunderstanding. But seeing the pout on Taemin’s lips as the boy wrestled with the sheets to wrap them around his naked body, Minho couldn't bring himself to ruin the moment.
Ridding himself of the towel he had tied around his waist, Minho stood before Taemin in all his naked glory, the smile on his face somewhat troubled.
Taemin made him some room, rolling over to his side as an invitation and Minho slipped under the covers, sighing contently.As soon as the rapper was comfortably lying down, his hands searched for Taemin, grabbing him by the hips and pulling him close.
Unlike on those awful nights they slept on their own respective beds, Taemin relaxed immediately, listening to the soft beating of Minho's heart and letting it lull him to sleep.
A few hours later, they were woken up by screaming. A disturbingly familiar voice was screeching at the top of his lugs:
“I cannot believe it! Jinki, dear, look! We go out for one night and they make such a mess in the bathroom! Poor Jjong was so shocked he had to go to the neighbor's just to take a piss! They even left water in the tub! Omo- is that jizz floating in it?! Aah! My favorite moisturizer! What have they done?!”
The loud stomping came closer to the room in which the two lovebirds were stirring from their deep slumber. Taemin grinned at Minho sleepily, and Minho feared for his life (or worse, his dick), hearing his name being called.
“Minho~?!” Kibum barged into their room with a horrifyingly fake smile on his face which couldn’t mean anything good. What was even worse - Kibum had a spatula in his hand that had never looked quite as deadly.
But the scary expression transformed into a look of curiosity when Kibum saw the couple cuddling in bed. Taemin looked happy, which made Kibum happy, since his best friend had been depressed for long weeks. Kibum had been close to giving Minho a proper earful for making the boy sad and only Taemin’s pleads had stopped him.
“You guys, uh- made up?”
Taemin giggled at Kibum’s shock, Minho was uncertain- were his balls no longer in danger?
The rapper looked down at Taemin, blissfully snuggled up to him and his lips curled up as he hoped that from then on, he could wake up like that every morning (without Kibum's screaming, of course).
“Oh, oka-ay.” Kibum said slowly, staring at them uncertainly. Minho ruffled Taemin's hair and chuckled, when the teen let out a small mewl. Kibum’s anger dissolved. What could he do- seeing Taemin smile sincerely was like a weight had been lifted from his chest.
Kibum sighed, hiding a small smile of his own. “Well then. I’m giving you two half an hour. Then I expect you, Minho, to clean the bathroom,” Kibum told them sternly, putting all the blame on the rapper before leaving the pair alone.
Minho watched soft morning light play on his lover's hair and huffed. He hated himself for it, but there were still some issues left unsettled. “Taeminnie?”
The teen didn't look up from where he was toying with Minho's nipple, an activity which Minho found very distracting “Yeah?”
“Why do you have that album?”
Minho immediately felt the small body in his arms stiffen and he held onto Taemin tighter. He felt more than heard a sigh leave Taemin's lungs, but no words escaped just yet.
“Well...” The teen finally started. “I've always liked to take pictures, you know. So that I don't miss or forget anything or anyone. I guess, that's why?”
The tone he used was light and easy, but with a tinge of guilt. Minho frowned, sitting up so that he could look his lover in the eyes. “I think you know what I meant.” he said sadly, still holding Taemin close, but carefully observing the changes in his body language.
“You avoided me.” it was a simple statement, but it shook the ground under Minho, whose eyes widened with incomprehension. “I avoided you? I think it was the other way around. You were always so busy, always doing something new and meeting new people.”
The barely concealed jealousy was audible in Minho’s shaking voice. Taemin laid his head on Minho's shoulder and rested a hand on the rapper's heart to satiate him.
“Well, If you want the truth, I-I just wanted you to look at me.”
“Huh? But- I'm always looking at you! What are you talking about?”
Taemin sighed, rubbing soothing circles into the rapper’s chest. Minho looked down at him pleadingly, begging for explanations.
“You're always so far away. So strong. So good to anyone. Me, too, of course. But you don't tell about your troubles and issues to anyone. And I kind of thought I was troubling you, always being like a clingy baby. So I thought that if I became a better Taemin, someone you could be proud of, someone you could lean on, not just someone who's way too dependent, can't handle himself, and-”
“Ssh.” Minho said, rocking them back and forth as he sensed Taemin getting upset. He never wanted to make Taemin cry again. “You know, baby. I've never thought of you that way.”
“Then why were you getting all distant?” Taemin inquired, the words slightly muffled by Minho's shoulder, as he pressed himself as close as it was humanly possible, holding on as if he was the one scared of the other disappearing.
“I thought you were going to leave me.”
“Wha-” Minho didn't let him interrupt. He needed to get it off his chest, then or never.
“Have you looked at yourself in the mirror lately, Minnie? You- You're, well, beautiful, talented, amazing, hard-working, cute, awesome at everything you do. You have so many skills and you're not afraid of trying anything new. You were suddenly, just, everywhere. Doing so many things. Developing so fast, that my head started spinning. Taemin, I'm just a normal guy. I don't have super powers. When you outgrow me, I won't be able to catch up with you. I just, uh, don't want you to go...”
Taemin hugged Minho without saying anything and Minho knew he got his message across. The dancer's smooth palms were on him, moving without a destination, just assuring him that it is real, that Taemin was with him and not planning to go anywhere.
Then Taemin lifted his head to meet Minho's eyes. Those large orbs, filled to the brim with innocence and happiness had pearly tears in the corners. He was smiling.
“Funny, I was thinking almost the same thing. You were suddenly so carefree and letting people in so easily. I thought you were the one trying to leave me behind.”
They kept the eye-contact, conveying messages of reassurance which couldn’t be put into words. Then, as the mood in the room eased, Taemin started making childish faces. He was gleeful. They were okay. Minho loved him.
The older boy snorted and mumbled something about “Taemin's fantastic elastic face”, before diving deep under the covers and taking Taemin with him.
“You silly boy” Minho mumbled into the maknae's hair, not ready to leave the warmth of the sheets yet “Don't you ever doubt in my love.”
“But you have to tell me stuff, too, okay?” Taemin demanded, pouting. Minho laughed, amused by his lover's...Indeed, his lover's bratty antics. “Yeah, okay, whenever I get scared of ghosts, you'll be the first to know.”
“Hey! Hyung, that's not fair! Why are you like this?”
Minho wondered if they could get away with a morning quickie, now that their troubles had turned into dust and Taemin was hot and naked, in bed with him.
The dancer play-punched Minho for not paying attention and zoning off. Minho was just about to pin Taemin under him, ravish him until he squealed, when someone knocked on the door timidly.
Jonghyun poked his head into the room, keeping his eyes trained on the floor in fear of seeing something he’d rather not witness.
“Um, guys? Could you clean up the bathroom now? I would really appreciate a shower. And Kibum says breakfast is ready and-”
Minho threw the closest thing- which happened to be a dirty sock- at Jonghyun to get him out. After their door closed, he planned to curl around Taemin once more and continue what had been started, but the smal teen easily slid out of his reach.
“Wha? Where'ya going?” Minho asked, a chill sneaking under the sheets when Taemin crawled out of bed.. The dancer gave him a wicked smile, before blowing a kiss and pulling on some nice tight boxers. Minho appreciated the view, of course.
“You can sleep. I'll go fetch some breakfast. You want me to bring you some?” Taemin asked innocently, slipping into one of Minho's old T-shirts. It was large for Minho, thus huge for Taemin, but he looked endearingly adorable and very much owned by Minho so he didn’t mind.
“I could just eat you...”
“Okay, breakfast in bed it is.” Taemin suggested with a wink, ignoring Minho's perverted offer and twirling around to leave the room. Minho couldn't help but stare, and not just because Taemin looked damn cute.
The rapper smiled to himself, stretching out his muscles and grinning, recalling the reason why he was so sore. Soon, Taemin would return to his side and Minho would bribe the teen to mouth-feed him.
Their lives would go on. Together. And that one moment when Taemin was standing there with his back towards Minho, just before he opened the door, would be etched into Minho’s memory for years.
Because Taemin had no wings.
a/n: while this i definitely not the best fanfic i've ever written, it's still very important to me and i'd go as far as to say that it holds a special place in my heart, since it was the first fic i ever wrote in this fandom about three years ago. this is an edited version - i changed the wording a bit, cut some unnecessary parts and fixed some mistakes, but tried my best to keep the story line and its awkwardness as it was.
i guess it shows how much i've grown during the years. ^^