team spirit
The three of them were strolling through a corridor of the A&E wards together; Stuart with his usual slightly affected, mildly unconvincing swagger, Rachid sloping along with a more natural-looking confidence, and Ashley-as usual-being the only one not thinking about it and therefore appearing the most composed.
“We’d better get back to the bus before the ‘team’ tossing fucking bloody stupid ‘leader’ shows up to make things difficult,” Stuart said as they rounded the corner, heading outwards from the acceptably sterilised heart of the emergency rooms.
“I don’t get this big vendetta you have against the term ‘team leader’,” Ashley replied, mainly because he was bored and knew Stuart well enough to know that it would trigger a rant. It did.
“Because it’s a lovey-dovey bloody useless shitcake of a phrase that’s meant to make us all sound like a bunch of smiley, happy, fused-together, giggly, affable, dot-eyed Care Bears about to dissolve into a hugging, hyperglycaemic puddle of familial togetherness and it’s bullshit! What next? Crew buddy? Gang mascot? Maybe instead of EMTs we’ll be known as Ambulance Friends, yeah?”
“Mate, if you’re reading this much into it, I think you need serious help,” Ashley replied, marginally more amused than he had been before.
“Or you need to get a life,” Rachid interjected, and Ashley gave a solemn incline of the head in assent.
“Piss off.” The three of them hit the cold, quiet outside air with their usual expressions of relief. “And the ‘team leader’ herself isn’t all jellybeans and unicorns, perpetually teetering on the brink of fury with her eyebrows like hairline cracks in a china plate…”
“Have you ever considered, like, enjoying life, Stu?” Rachid asked, sounding almost admiring. But only almost.
“What’s to enjoy?”
“Aside from relentless whining, you mean?” Ashley replied.
“Relentless whining we have to put up with.” Stuart levelled a look at Rachid for his comment and then opened out his arms in an exaggerated shrug.
“You know, you two, you should be thankful that I make you think.”
“Make us think? More like bloody miserable,” Ashley said.
“Suicidal is closer.” Rachid pulled out one of his ever-present packets of Revels from a pocket of his jumpsuit that was not technically for chocolate, popped it open and stuffed a finger into it. Before Stuart even opened his mouth-“No.”
“That’s pretty stingy, Rachid. I’m hurt.”
“Why? Because we’re teammates? No way, man, I’m subscribing to your line of thinking. You can fuck right off.”
Ashley laughed at that. Stuart didn’t-out loud, anyway.
“We’d better get back to the bus before the ‘team’ tossing fucking bloody stupid ‘leader’ shows up to make things difficult,” Stuart said as they rounded the corner, heading outwards from the acceptably sterilised heart of the emergency rooms.
“I don’t get this big vendetta you have against the term ‘team leader’,” Ashley replied, mainly because he was bored and knew Stuart well enough to know that it would trigger a rant. It did.
“Because it’s a lovey-dovey bloody useless shitcake of a phrase that’s meant to make us all sound like a bunch of smiley, happy, fused-together, giggly, affable, dot-eyed Care Bears about to dissolve into a hugging, hyperglycaemic puddle of familial togetherness and it’s bullshit! What next? Crew buddy? Gang mascot? Maybe instead of EMTs we’ll be known as Ambulance Friends, yeah?”
“Mate, if you’re reading this much into it, I think you need serious help,” Ashley replied, marginally more amused than he had been before.
“Or you need to get a life,” Rachid interjected, and Ashley gave a solemn incline of the head in assent.
“Piss off.” The three of them hit the cold, quiet outside air with their usual expressions of relief. “And the ‘team leader’ herself isn’t all jellybeans and unicorns, perpetually teetering on the brink of fury with her eyebrows like hairline cracks in a china plate…”
“Have you ever considered, like, enjoying life, Stu?” Rachid asked, sounding almost admiring. But only almost.
“What’s to enjoy?”
“Aside from relentless whining, you mean?” Ashley replied.
“Relentless whining we have to put up with.” Stuart levelled a look at Rachid for his comment and then opened out his arms in an exaggerated shrug.
“You know, you two, you should be thankful that I make you think.”
“Make us think? More like bloody miserable,” Ashley said.
“Suicidal is closer.” Rachid pulled out one of his ever-present packets of Revels from a pocket of his jumpsuit that was not technically for chocolate, popped it open and stuffed a finger into it. Before Stuart even opened his mouth-“No.”
“That’s pretty stingy, Rachid. I’m hurt.”
“Why? Because we’re teammates? No way, man, I’m subscribing to your line of thinking. You can fuck right off.”
Ashley laughed at that. Stuart didn’t-out loud, anyway.