You Have Your Answer, Chapter 4
Title: You Have Your Answer
Author: HeddaMac
Pairing: Daniel/Vala
Rating/Category: T to be safe
Spoilers: Stargate SG-1-Season 10, Ark of Truth
Stargate Atlantis-First Contact, The Lost Tribe
Chapter Four
Thanks to Spacegypsy1 for the massive Beta help to keep this on track.
Lam finally allowed Daniel his laptop-not that he could concentrate on the last set of texts SG-6 had brought in from a planet connected to the Canaanite goddess Asherah. He couldn’t remember ever being so overwhelmed by helplessness. At least when Amonet had Sha’re he was able to fight to free her even though he ultimately failed to save her life. And when he was ascended he chose to interfere because he knew saving the galaxy from Anubis was more important than a set of rules disregarding life on a lower plain.
Sha’re. Daniel shuddered recalling the roller coaster of waking up naked with no memory, remembering his beloved wife, and finally regaining the knowledge that Sha’re was dead. He’d felt empty then. When he woke in the infirmary with memories of the fifty years on the Odyssey, for a moment he knew the same joy that he experienced when he remembered his wife. But when Jack told him Vala was missing, the desolation threw him back to the moment when he realized Sha’re was long dead. Daniel tried to center his thoughts on the fact that Vala was still out there with SG-1; she wasn’t gone forever.
He knew, however, that the people he cared for the most got hurt. It was part of the reason he pushed Vala away. It was difficult for him to not catalog all of the times he nearly lost her. When she disappeared during the Ori Beachhead, Daniel had hope that he would find her, and he had no doubt that she was doing everything in her power to get back home. He couldn’t build his own supergate to bring her back, but he could fight the Ori and hope that it brought him one step closer to finding her.
He could admit now that seeing her pregnant when he was trapped in her body made him jealous, but that was nothing compared to the fear that rushed through him when he was back in his own body listening to the recording of her saying she knew nothing about how she conceived. It was a comfort, however, to know that she was still fighting. At the second supergate when he realized he had beamed himself aboard one of the Ori ships, he wanted to take the ship back to the Ori galaxy to find her. But he didn’t have to because she was there. To use her word she had to be all “wonko” and try to save him from a staff blast. Thank God Adria healed her. The moment he recognized the sensation of the Asgard beaming technology he grabbed her because there was no way in hell he was going to be that close to saving her only to lose her one more time.
When she was kidnapped he spent weeks doing everything he could to get a lead on Athena. And God, the relief when she said his name, and he was able to pull her close to comfort her. He sighed when he recalled the warmth that overwhelmed him when he held her. Even then though, he couldn’t admit that he was beyond in love with her. But damn it; this time Lam had him confined to the infirmary. He had to think. Jack needed to get him out of there. If not that, then he had to find another way to help find Vala. He had finally realized he loved her, but he couldn’t save her unless he could come up with a plan. The rest of SG-1 couldn’t even save her. Hell, the rest of SG-1. Guilt washed over Daniel. He had hardly spared them a thought. How would he tell Cassandra if something happened to Sam and Teal’c?
Luckily Jack interrupted his depressing train of thought.
“I see Lam finally let you have your computer.”
Daniel didn’t acknowledge Jack’s statement. Instead he asked, “Jack, what do you do?”
Jack didn’t need to ask what Daniel was referring too. It was what he dealt with each time his former team went on a mission. “Well, I work for a demanding boss that keeps me busy, and I have faith. Faith in Carter to shut down a black hole. Faith in T to level an army with a raised eyebrow. Now I have faith in Mitchell to keep everyone together, and faith in the Princess to maneuver them through every sleazy underbelly from here to Pegasus. You know what they’re capable of, and you need to trust that they’ll do what is needed to get home.”
Daniel shifted in the bed and debated whether or not to ask Jack his next question. They never discussed Sam. But he needed the perspective. “How do you handle it when Sam goes missing?”
It was Jack’s turn to shift uncomfortably in the chair next to Daniel’s bed. “Daniel…”
“Jack…”
Jack could hear the edge of worry in his voice, so he caved, “Don’t you ever-and I mean never, Daniel-repeat this to Carter because she will kill me. If you do, I will take away all your Ancient toys and books. When I first stepped away from the team to run the SGC I had to fight worrying about her, but Carter needed to know I believed in her. There were moments when she doubted that I trusted her, but it wasn’t that. It was my own fear and my own feeling of uselessness. For the most part I am fine now, but sometimes it catches up to me. It’s easier when I know she’s with the rest of SG-1 and not out there alone. Odd, isn’t it, since you are all danger prone. You could get in trouble turning on your office light, so I am thrilled that you can ascend as quickly as you can translate. Vala, on the other hand, is cunning. She’s strong and determined. You know she can handle herself. ”
“Thanks, Jack. Oh, and get me out of here.”
“I’ll talk to Lam. At the very least, I’ll try to get her to give you a few hours a day in your office even if she won’t release from the infirmary completely. I’ll have Reynolds and Dixon come brief you about what they’ve found as soon as their teams get back. Until then SG-6 needs your help. Get to it.”
Posted via LiveJournal app for iPhone.