The Question
I had written this fic back in March after reflecting on what might happen with Sam and Pete. It's funny how every time I see them together, and see Sam liking him so much, I stop feeling so strongly about Sam and Jack. But here is what I wrote during a lull.
Title: The Question
Author: Heidiweidel
Spoilers: Chimera, possibly Affinity
Rated: G
Author's Note: This story was begun before season 7 was over
and before season 8 spoilers began. Rushed to post upon
seeing a reference to a spoiler photo. My version of reality. Mine!
Many thanks to Evangeline, my ever-patient and equally-committed-
to-perfection beta-reader, to Venom for the insightful comments
that whipped this into shape, and to Linz for helping me sort out some
pesky verbage and cheering me on. You are all fantastic!
Disclaimer: Not for profit; not my characters.
My story; copyright Mar. 7, 2004.
Technical note: ** indicate thoughts or emphasis.
----
SG-1 was encamped on a lovely spot overlooking the ocean of a
remarkably earthlike world. It was evening, and the moonlight shone
brightly. They were on a routine mission to follow up successful
treaty negotiations. The team was relaxed, their enemies
had been defeated, and times were starting to look brighter.
Colonel O'Neill had taken a brief walk to stretch his legs before
turning the watch over to Major Carter. He returned to find the
major staring blankly into space. It was time to find out what
had been troubling her these past few days.
"Carter." She turned to him, startled. "You've
been…preoccupied lately. What gives?"
Sam came to attention guiltily and apologized. "Sorry, sir, it
won't happen again. I'm good for my rotation." At his
continuing expectant look, she added with a shake of her
head, "It's personal."
Jack gazed at her for a moment, and then dropped down beside her
on the log they'd made a seat of.
"Carter, how long have we known each other? Seven, eight years?
C'mon, spill." His voice was understanding, his eyes
concerned.
She softened slightly from her overtly professional stance, and
confessed reluctantly, "Pete asked me to marry him."
Jack felt the blood drain from his face and hoped it wasn't too
obvious that she had just turned his world upside down with those
few simple words. He sucked in his breath and put on a brave face.
"Ah, I see. And yet…no humming? Not brimming with joy?"
He tried to sound casual and as usual, turned to humor
as a cover.
"More like panic," Sam admitted. She ducked her eyes
sheepishly.
Jack huffed a bit in amusement and quipped, "Panic? That's
what guys usually do when they hear the "M" word."
Sam responded wryly, "I guess I've been hanging around the
military too long." She chuckled lightly along with him;
then fell silent. *That was too true.*
Jack thought a bit, looking around awkwardly before finally
venturing, "So, what did you tell him?"
She gazed pensively out at the waves lapping at the shoreline.
"That I'm not sure. That I might not be ready."
"Ouch."
"I know…I had to be honest, though. He deserves that."
Jack hated to admit it, but he had to agree. He cleared his throat
around the lump that had been forming there and nodded,
letting his morbid curiosity take over. "How'd he take
it?"
"He was disappointed, but I think he understands. He's
giving me some space..." Sam looked down at her hands idly
rolling the hem of her shirt and added quietly, "...to think."
Jack kicked at a rock, trying to decide if he should ask. At last
he queried, "So, what seems to be the problem?"
She closed her eyes, bit her bottom lip, and turned away from him
with a reticence that made him regret asking. But before he
could apologize, she answered hesitantly, "I think
it's…you." She braved a glance to see his reaction.
Raised eyebrows.
"Me?" He fought to hide the rising tide of emotion in his
chest. * Whoa, hold on, maybe she just wants my approval.
Couldn't really be….* He shifted uncomfortably.
She seemed not to notice as she nodded slowly. "I thought
I'd…moved on. Or maybe that I'd been using…all
*that*… to keep from getting hurt." She pondered the
darkness as if it held the answer.
He struggled for a response. "All *that"? She could make out
the familiar squint of his eyes scrutinizing her face for the
truth.
Sam looked away in embarrassment, and spoke in measured tones,
"I got to thinking that maybe I had set my sights on…the
unattainable…to keep from getting involved with someone
else."
"Uh huh." Jack still wondered what the hell she was talking
about. What was unattainable? But he decided to cut to the
chase. "And now?"
Sam shook her head, uncertain, and yet spoke determinedly, "I
don't know. I *do* know that I can't marry Pete while
I'm still wondering if there might have been a chance…."
She broke off, suddenly afraid to say the words.
"A chance?"
She mustered her courage and turned, looking straight into his eyes.
"…for *us*."
He was both startled and thrilled by her candor - there could be
no doubt of what she meant now -- but again he tried to keep
the hope out of his voice. He wouldn't unduly influence her by
his own feelings. He said in measured tones, "What if I can
answer that for you?"
He saw a guarded look come into her eyes. She waited, hushed.
Jack took the leap. "Yes. Yes, there was a chance for us."
He saw her flinch at the word `was.' "Maybe…there
still *is*?" He finished, watching her reaction closely.
Sam's face grew pale and she seemed to find it hard to breathe.
She sat there, as if stunned, swallowing feverishly.
"Carter. Sam. Remember to breathe," Jack urged gently. He
laid his hand on hers, a smile beginning to spread across his
face.
She still could not answer, just gave a tremulous smile and
fought back the tears. She could scarcely look at him.
"Panic?" he teased, his eyes sparkling.
His playful manner broke her paralysis. She shook with silent
laughter and whispered, "Joy…." A brilliant smile lit up
her face as she turned her shining eyes to his.
"…so `hum-worthy.'"
Jack chortled happily as he wrapped his arms around her. His spirits
skyrocketed. He could hear her heart pacing quickly as she returned
his embrace.
A few moments later she pulled away, realizing that they were still
on duty. They grinned sheepishly at each other until Sam sobered
and looked away. "I'll need to talk to Pete…"
"Of course. And there's no pressure...."
Sam turned back to him with a warm smile. "I know." She touched his
shoulder lightly then rose to begin her watch.
Jack watched as she walked away. She didn't look back. He
recalled once more that awkward moment in the elevator and began
to hum. *Poor Pete.*
-----
Fin
Since last night's episode, I know I will be taking a break from S/J writing, but the muse will return. :)
Title: The Question
Author: Heidiweidel
Spoilers: Chimera, possibly Affinity
Rated: G
Author's Note: This story was begun before season 7 was over
and before season 8 spoilers began. Rushed to post upon
seeing a reference to a spoiler photo. My version of reality. Mine!
Many thanks to Evangeline, my ever-patient and equally-committed-
to-perfection beta-reader, to Venom for the insightful comments
that whipped this into shape, and to Linz for helping me sort out some
pesky verbage and cheering me on. You are all fantastic!
Disclaimer: Not for profit; not my characters.
My story; copyright Mar. 7, 2004.
Technical note: ** indicate thoughts or emphasis.
----
SG-1 was encamped on a lovely spot overlooking the ocean of a
remarkably earthlike world. It was evening, and the moonlight shone
brightly. They were on a routine mission to follow up successful
treaty negotiations. The team was relaxed, their enemies
had been defeated, and times were starting to look brighter.
Colonel O'Neill had taken a brief walk to stretch his legs before
turning the watch over to Major Carter. He returned to find the
major staring blankly into space. It was time to find out what
had been troubling her these past few days.
"Carter." She turned to him, startled. "You've
been…preoccupied lately. What gives?"
Sam came to attention guiltily and apologized. "Sorry, sir, it
won't happen again. I'm good for my rotation." At his
continuing expectant look, she added with a shake of her
head, "It's personal."
Jack gazed at her for a moment, and then dropped down beside her
on the log they'd made a seat of.
"Carter, how long have we known each other? Seven, eight years?
C'mon, spill." His voice was understanding, his eyes
concerned.
She softened slightly from her overtly professional stance, and
confessed reluctantly, "Pete asked me to marry him."
Jack felt the blood drain from his face and hoped it wasn't too
obvious that she had just turned his world upside down with those
few simple words. He sucked in his breath and put on a brave face.
"Ah, I see. And yet…no humming? Not brimming with joy?"
He tried to sound casual and as usual, turned to humor
as a cover.
"More like panic," Sam admitted. She ducked her eyes
sheepishly.
Jack huffed a bit in amusement and quipped, "Panic? That's
what guys usually do when they hear the "M" word."
Sam responded wryly, "I guess I've been hanging around the
military too long." She chuckled lightly along with him;
then fell silent. *That was too true.*
Jack thought a bit, looking around awkwardly before finally
venturing, "So, what did you tell him?"
She gazed pensively out at the waves lapping at the shoreline.
"That I'm not sure. That I might not be ready."
"Ouch."
"I know…I had to be honest, though. He deserves that."
Jack hated to admit it, but he had to agree. He cleared his throat
around the lump that had been forming there and nodded,
letting his morbid curiosity take over. "How'd he take
it?"
"He was disappointed, but I think he understands. He's
giving me some space..." Sam looked down at her hands idly
rolling the hem of her shirt and added quietly, "...to think."
Jack kicked at a rock, trying to decide if he should ask. At last
he queried, "So, what seems to be the problem?"
She closed her eyes, bit her bottom lip, and turned away from him
with a reticence that made him regret asking. But before he
could apologize, she answered hesitantly, "I think
it's…you." She braved a glance to see his reaction.
Raised eyebrows.
"Me?" He fought to hide the rising tide of emotion in his
chest. * Whoa, hold on, maybe she just wants my approval.
Couldn't really be….* He shifted uncomfortably.
She seemed not to notice as she nodded slowly. "I thought
I'd…moved on. Or maybe that I'd been using…all
*that*… to keep from getting hurt." She pondered the
darkness as if it held the answer.
He struggled for a response. "All *that"? She could make out
the familiar squint of his eyes scrutinizing her face for the
truth.
Sam looked away in embarrassment, and spoke in measured tones,
"I got to thinking that maybe I had set my sights on…the
unattainable…to keep from getting involved with someone
else."
"Uh huh." Jack still wondered what the hell she was talking
about. What was unattainable? But he decided to cut to the
chase. "And now?"
Sam shook her head, uncertain, and yet spoke determinedly, "I
don't know. I *do* know that I can't marry Pete while
I'm still wondering if there might have been a chance…."
She broke off, suddenly afraid to say the words.
"A chance?"
She mustered her courage and turned, looking straight into his eyes.
"…for *us*."
He was both startled and thrilled by her candor - there could be
no doubt of what she meant now -- but again he tried to keep
the hope out of his voice. He wouldn't unduly influence her by
his own feelings. He said in measured tones, "What if I can
answer that for you?"
He saw a guarded look come into her eyes. She waited, hushed.
Jack took the leap. "Yes. Yes, there was a chance for us."
He saw her flinch at the word `was.' "Maybe…there
still *is*?" He finished, watching her reaction closely.
Sam's face grew pale and she seemed to find it hard to breathe.
She sat there, as if stunned, swallowing feverishly.
"Carter. Sam. Remember to breathe," Jack urged gently. He
laid his hand on hers, a smile beginning to spread across his
face.
She still could not answer, just gave a tremulous smile and
fought back the tears. She could scarcely look at him.
"Panic?" he teased, his eyes sparkling.
His playful manner broke her paralysis. She shook with silent
laughter and whispered, "Joy…." A brilliant smile lit up
her face as she turned her shining eyes to his.
"…so `hum-worthy.'"
Jack chortled happily as he wrapped his arms around her. His spirits
skyrocketed. He could hear her heart pacing quickly as she returned
his embrace.
A few moments later she pulled away, realizing that they were still
on duty. They grinned sheepishly at each other until Sam sobered
and looked away. "I'll need to talk to Pete…"
"Of course. And there's no pressure...."
Sam turned back to him with a warm smile. "I know." She touched his
shoulder lightly then rose to begin her watch.
Jack watched as she walked away. She didn't look back. He
recalled once more that awkward moment in the elevator and began
to hum. *Poor Pete.*
-----
Fin
Since last night's episode, I know I will be taking a break from S/J writing, but the muse will return. :)