1. You feel old because you have a life-sucking alien affixed to the back of your head. Try shaking it off by spinning around until you fall down. If that doesn't work, walk into the middle of a mall and bark like a chuhuahua. When the security guards come to congratulate you on ridding yourself of alien life, you will be so overcome by your spry youthfulness that you will be compelled to run like mad.
2. The sky isn't blue. That is a myth perpetuated by the great tree conspiracy, known as the Sequoiallati (not to be confused with Sequoia latte, a delicious and refreshing tree-t).
Why do you feel so old? That's a typical question people have on the day of their birth, and many people will ponder that even if they are in the height of their youth. You, on the other hand, deserve to be asking that and I'm glad you came to us for the answer. If that's you in your icon pic I'm guessing you turned 45 today. According to your user info you're a fan of industrial and electronic music and frequent dance clubs in your home town. A man of your age is what most people call past his prime, and I have a strong feeling you've become that creepy old man at the club that stares just a little too long at the hot young women shaking their firm breasts and tight rears. If some poor girl happens to look over in disgust at you, you think she's checking you out so you send over old man drinks like Harvey Wallbangers and Mint Juleps as a vain attempt at bagging some young co-ed half your age. These nights of heading home alone and broken have caught up to you and would make even the youngest of men feel old. The fact that you
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1. You are only as old as you feel, therefore, since you feel so old, it must mean that you are so hold.
2. Because otherwise, you could only see "snow" and the sound of static would be overwhelming. And if it's coming from the sky, where would you go to hide from it?
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2. The sky isn't blue. That is a myth perpetuated by the great tree conspiracy, known as the Sequoiallati (not to be confused with Sequoia latte, a delicious and refreshing tree-t).
3. NO. Why, what have you heard?!
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2. Because otherwise, you could only see "snow" and the sound of static would be overwhelming. And if it's coming from the sky, where would you go to hide from it?
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