...For America. [1/5]
anonymous
August 14 2009, 04:53:01 UTC
I really do apologize. The prompt called for a crack-filled lulz-fest. But after listening to the song too many times, I wrote…well, I wrote something very long and quite a bit more serious than you were probably expecting. And the theme of the song is used…very ironically.
Beware: Serious!Philosophical!America
Hank Peterson was a self-proclaimed true American patriot. He drove an American-made Ford F-150 pickup (no teeny-weeny foreign cars would ever be allowed to park in his driveway) plastered with dozens of “God Bless America” bumper stickers. Every morning he would raise the stars and stripes proudly on the flagpole in his front yard, pronouncing every word of the Pledge of Allegiance with all the passion of a great orator. He happily flaunted his second amendment rights, owning several kinds of firearms for hunting and self-defense. He proudly voted Republican, the party of small business and personal freedom, the party that reflected the true spirit of the United States. He was a good Christian man, a proud believer in the
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...For America. [4/5]
anonymous
August 14 2009, 05:12:21 UTC
There was a long silence as America stopped to catch his breath. His words caught Hank completely off-guard. He hadn’t expected such an eloquent speech. The words echoed through his mind.
America is talking to me, he mused, in a brief moment of clarity. My country is talking to me. He shook his head to try to ignore just how ridiculous that sounded
( ... )
...For America. [5/5]
anonymous
August 14 2009, 05:15:23 UTC
When he woke up, sun was pouring through the windows of his bedroom. He realized that he was lying in his own bed, and his wife was standing over him. His head pounded fiercely, but for some reason, it didn’t seem to bother him as much as usual
( ... )
Re: ...For America. [5/5]
anonymous
August 14 2009, 16:06:28 UTC
My gosh, anon. That was beautiful in so many ways. I love how you portrait Hank as the typical conservative American and the bitter ideas that he carries.
And gosh! Can America get any cooler than he was in this fill?! I think NOT! Serious!America is such a turn on! >w
Re: ...For America. [5/5]
anonymous
August 14 2009, 17:16:36 UTC
Oh, that was really well done, Anon! This Anon's ENTIRE family is like this- NRA-touting, hardcore Republican patriots- so to see the change of heart at the end was refreshing. Great job!
Re: ...For America. [5/5]
anonymous
August 15 2009, 07:12:30 UTC
Is it bad that my favorite part of this was England being a badass? He seems right at home breaking some guys nose in a bar.
Aww, I like Hank, good honest man. :) I can't help loving a man who loves his wife raises his family. I face palmed at some of the things he said in his drunken(?) state. lol ,but it's nothing I haven't heard before. It's cool that he studied up and got active in local government.
I couldn't help it, I laughed.
anonymous
August 18 2009, 05:57:07 UTC
Hank... That name instantly made me think of Hank Hill from King of the Hill. And this sentence here "He went back to work at his job at the construction company, he still drove his Ford pickup proudly, he still loved hunting with his guns, he still went to the bar every Friday night and church every Sunday morning" made me laugh immensely, even though it shouldn't have. I live in Texas, and more than half of the people where I live do exactly that, as well as think like Hank did.
I wish the things that happened in this story would happen to people here, because the world (or in this case, should I say America?) could sure use it.
Any America/X couple is fine.
reCaptcha says: only bisons. Yeah, America is home to bisons. XD
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Beware: Serious!Philosophical!America
Hank Peterson was a self-proclaimed true American patriot. He drove an American-made Ford F-150 pickup (no teeny-weeny foreign cars would ever be allowed to park in his driveway) plastered with dozens of “God Bless America” bumper stickers. Every morning he would raise the stars and stripes proudly on the flagpole in his front yard, pronouncing every word of the Pledge of Allegiance with all the passion of a great orator. He happily flaunted his second amendment rights, owning several kinds of firearms for hunting and self-defense. He proudly voted Republican, the party of small business and personal freedom, the party that reflected the true spirit of the United States. He was a good Christian man, a proud believer in the ( ... )
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America is talking to me, he mused, in a brief moment of clarity. My country is talking to me. He shook his head to try to ignore just how ridiculous that sounded ( ... )
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And gosh! Can America get any cooler than he was in this fill?! I think NOT! Serious!America is such a turn on! >w
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Thank you thank you thank you for doing such lovely art!
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Aww, I like Hank, good honest man. :) I can't help loving a man who loves his wife raises his family. I face palmed at some of the things he said in his drunken(?) state. lol ,but it's nothing I haven't heard before. It's cool that he studied up and got active in local government.
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I wish the things that happened in this story would happen to people here, because the world (or in this case, should I say America?) could sure use it.
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Damn it, why is it not possible to +memory a comment? TTATT
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