Constraints [2/5?]
anonymous
November 17 2009, 02:43:40 UTC
A week passed, and then another, and Ivan began to feel whole again, as though he could cope.
And as soon as he could smile again, Stalin returned to his bed.
Again, the man asked for no consent, simply stripped Ivan of his clothing and pushed him down, mocking him even as he violated him, taunting him, encouraging him to lift the pipe and strike out, laughing at him when he did nothing but cry.
And every time Ivan began to recover from one attack, Stalin raped him again, and the cycle began anew. And each renewal broken Ivan closer and closer to a deep, ominous cliff in his mind, until he teetered on the very brink of it. And he knew that one more time, one last step, and he would be lost, and his people, his children, the citizens that so loved his abuser and needed him so- they would suffer.
But a Nation could not harm his people, and Ivan could not save himself.
Finally, finally, Ivan was granted peace. There was no call for Stalin to be at the meeting- the conference was for Nations alone, and their bosses did not attend
( ... )
Constraints [3/5?]
anonymous
November 17 2009, 02:46:15 UTC
They were all whispering the next day. He could hear them, caught snatches of words and phrases as they gave him sidelong glances and snickered behind their hands. Ivan did his best to ignore them, to concentrate on important things and hold himself together, but it was hard
( ... )
Constraints [4/5?]
anonymous
November 17 2009, 02:49:20 UTC
Silence followed Ivan's exit. None of the Nations still in the room were quite sure what to make of that speech for a long moment, then the room erupted in a confused babble
( ... )
Constraints [5/6]
anonymous
November 17 2009, 02:51:32 UTC
Both of them together managed to lift Ivan and support him out of the hall and back to the hotel where he was staying. They got him settled as comfortably as possible, then Alfred literally kicked Arthur out, leaving a boot print on the back of Arthur's jacket and a bruise on his face from hitting the wall
( ... )
Constraints [6/6]
anonymous
November 17 2009, 02:57:31 UTC
Alfred woke with a neckache. Small wonder, since he'd spent all night sleeping in a chair. Also, his back hurt and he had a headache. But Ivan seemed to be sleeping okay, so he smiled and stood and stretched quietly before slipping out of the room.
Arthur was waiting uncomfortably in the hall, shifting from foot to foot and looking like he'd rather be naked and tied to Francis's bed than here.
“How... how is he?” He asked quietly, not meeting Alfred's eyes.
“As well as can be expected, considering he's been raped by one of his own citizens and you spread that fact around like it's fucking funny.”
Arthur at least had the decency to wince. “It's... not a citizen, Alfred.” He said after a moment, biting his lip. “It's his... his boss.”
Alfred stared at him for a long moment, face blank, before backhanding him into the wall.
“You absolute ass.” He snarled, glaring down at Arthur. “I swear to fucking God, when I'm done with Stalin, I'm coming after you.”
Ivan didn't return to Russia, after all. Not immediately, at least.
( ... )
Trigger!Anon
anonymous
November 17 2009, 03:11:37 UTC
Oh, Ivan...
Your Alfred gets several Crowning Moments of Awesome. Especially the part about Lithuania. While I will admit I felt some parts were rushed, I can't wait to see what you do with this when you de-anon - this feels as though it could be extended into a multi-chaptered story.
But take time with your NaNo, and then come back and play with this a bit, if you feel the need. Well done, Anon, everything considered.
I feel as though you're someone I know on my f-list....
Re: Trigger!Anon
anonymous
November 17 2009, 03:24:05 UTC
I don't think I'll ever de-anon, at least not on lj. If anything, I'll probably wind up posting anything here that I rewrite on dA. I just don't feel comfortable on lj yet, since I've only been here for a week.
Yet this is my fifth fill on the kink meme. I'm such a meme-whore. ;-;
*ahem*
Any tips on what can be improved for when I come back to this story? Effusive praise is nice and all, but I like advice better.
Re: Trigger!Anon
anonymous
November 17 2009, 03:36:12 UTC
Advice...hmm. Let me think.
When you come back to this, the first thing I'd suggest is writing out more scenes between Arthur and Ivan - particularly when Ivan comes to stay with Arthur. It doesn't even have to be talking - just show us that Arthur is walking on eggshells with Ivan, rather than telling us. And maybe experiment with using flashbacks as well, instead of telling us all about the abuse in the beginning. Reveal what happened in pieces - that will allow you to get to the meeting - and the conflict there - faster.
...I hope that made sense, at least, and that it helps you when the time comes. Good luck!
Ah, never mind, I just thought I knew you from somewhere. An F-list is a friendslist.
Re: Trigger!Anon
anonymous
November 17 2009, 03:43:26 UTC
It made perfect sense, and I'll definitely take it into account later, although I made a conscious decision to start with the abuse and work from there.
The lack of flashbacks is due to the abundance of them in my NaNo project (poor Alfred ;-; ), and when I'm writing two similar stories at once, they tend to bleed over and I feel like I'm overusing something if I use it in both stories. Hence why I said I should probably have waited to write this.
I wanted more Arthur/Ivan screen time, but it's already almost my bedtime, and I wanted to be done tonight. This is why, at least in my eyes, this fill is sort of fail. -3-
As a born and raised American who's proud of his country - even when we're basically being the jackasses of the world (*does not approve of Iraq*) - I find I tend to make America very badass. I try not to fawn too much. ^^;
*hands you tissues*
I am glad you liked it, but this is definitely a fill I'll be revisiting come December.
Also, I apologize if it seems a bit rushed, but I'm also doing NaNo, and really, I shouldn't be doing fills at all, so... yeah.
Pretty sure it'll be five parts, but it might be six. Now on with the fill already, amirite?
A Nation cannot hurt his people ( ... )
Reply
And as soon as he could smile again, Stalin returned to his bed.
Again, the man asked for no consent, simply stripped Ivan of his clothing and pushed him down, mocking him even as he violated him, taunting him, encouraging him to lift the pipe and strike out, laughing at him when he did nothing but cry.
And every time Ivan began to recover from one attack, Stalin raped him again, and the cycle began anew. And each renewal broken Ivan closer and closer to a deep, ominous cliff in his mind, until he teetered on the very brink of it. And he knew that one more time, one last step, and he would be lost, and his people, his children, the citizens that so loved his abuser and needed him so- they would suffer.
But a Nation could not harm his people, and Ivan could not save himself.
Finally, finally, Ivan was granted peace. There was no call for Stalin to be at the meeting- the conference was for Nations alone, and their bosses did not attend ( ... )
Reply
Reply
Reply
Reply
Arthur was waiting uncomfortably in the hall, shifting from foot to foot and looking like he'd rather be naked and tied to Francis's bed than here.
“How... how is he?” He asked quietly, not meeting Alfred's eyes.
“As well as can be expected, considering he's been raped by one of his own citizens and you spread that fact around like it's fucking funny.”
Arthur at least had the decency to wince. “It's... not a citizen, Alfred.” He said after a moment, biting his lip. “It's his... his boss.”
Alfred stared at him for a long moment, face blank, before backhanding him into the wall.
“You absolute ass.” He snarled, glaring down at Arthur. “I swear to fucking God, when I'm done with Stalin, I'm coming after you.”
Ivan didn't return to Russia, after all. Not immediately, at least. ( ... )
Reply
Your Alfred gets several Crowning Moments of Awesome. Especially the part about Lithuania. While I will admit I felt some parts were rushed, I can't wait to see what you do with this when you de-anon - this feels as though it could be extended into a multi-chaptered story.
But take time with your NaNo, and then come back and play with this a bit, if you feel the need. Well done, Anon, everything considered.
I feel as though you're someone I know on my f-list....
Reply
Yet this is my fifth fill on the kink meme. I'm such a meme-whore. ;-;
*ahem*
Any tips on what can be improved for when I come back to this story? Effusive praise is nice and all, but I like advice better.
what's an f-list?
Reply
When you come back to this, the first thing I'd suggest is writing out more scenes between Arthur and Ivan - particularly when Ivan comes to stay with Arthur. It doesn't even have to be talking - just show us that Arthur is walking on eggshells with Ivan, rather than telling us. And maybe experiment with using flashbacks as well, instead of telling us all about the abuse in the beginning. Reveal what happened in pieces - that will allow you to get to the meeting - and the conflict there - faster.
...I hope that made sense, at least, and that it helps you when the time comes. Good luck!
Ah, never mind, I just thought I knew you from somewhere. An F-list is a friendslist.
Reply
The lack of flashbacks is due to the abundance of them in my NaNo project (poor Alfred ;-; ), and when I'm writing two similar stories at once, they tend to bleed over and I feel like I'm overusing something if I use it in both stories. Hence why I said I should probably have waited to write this.
I wanted more Arthur/Ivan screen time, but it's already almost my bedtime, and I wanted to be done tonight. This is why, at least in my eyes, this fill is sort of fail. -3-
Reply
Reply
*hands you tissues*
I am glad you liked it, but this is definitely a fill I'll be revisiting come December.
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