* * * America forgets. He doesn't want to, but his memory is fickle. 1812 never happened, it was an 'accidental' fire; the wood of that grand old house was worn out from its years. Canada would say differently. America would let him, but he would never believe him. His brother spent too much time with France; they spoke differently there. The word for accident in their shared language could just as well have been arson. America forgets
( ... )
Your first? I'm honoured! And so good, too! What an interesting thing you did with my prompt, author anon...I was expecting and easier characterization and a simpler fic, instead you delivered something less easy to define, a complex relationship and a piece full of subtle emotions.
Myself, I especially loved the mentions to their different age, and the passage of time, Russia's lines on his face, America's newly acquired maturity that doesn't really reach tact yet. And of course, the little bittersweet mentions of some things, like Russia's heart aching when he hears others talk intimately, or his passing comment about visiting during summer and the lightbugs season. The parting not-quite-dialogue was perfect in its incompleteness, its implying and not saying outright.
I really loved this and I can't wait to see your next contribution to the meme! ^^
Hahah, I'm glad you enjoyed it. Ah, I admit when I first read your prompt, my mind did think of simple characterisations... but my heart felt something more, and those are the feelings I wanted to convey. So I'm glad that you picked up on them.
<3 I enjoy how everything you liked were my favourite points in writing this, and I shall definitely be contributing more to the meme. I've been lurking it long enough, (and FINALLY found a unfilled requests thread~), so why not give back?
Especially when I don't want to study for exams. x3
Re: [Part 9] "He forgets that Russia isn’t as strong as he used to be"[Ame/Rus] 2/2
anonymous
December 14 2010, 00:55:56 UTC
Oh this is so nice! The atmosphere between Russia and America was so understated and yet poignant at the same time. I especially loved the first 2 paragraphs. There was just something about them that made me feel sad and nostalgic (even though I never lived through those two era.)
Also: I love America in this. He's still the somewhat "tactless" teen we know, but he is becoming more mature under the weight of all the pressure he's under. serious!America is a turn on for me so yeah...
Just some typos I noticed for in case you plan to post this elsewhere :]
America's voice is close, but not boisterously loud. For this, Russia is thankful. Some days, most nights, he does not want to deal with eth nose the man can create. should be the noise
Russia continued, and America let him. But when no more words followed, the butter blonde nodded. And for this I think you meant other blond otherwise describing someone's hair color as butter color is a bit jarring. lol
* * * America forgets. He doesn't want to, but his memory is fickle. 1812 never happened, it was an 'accidental' fire; the wood of that grand old house was worn out from its years. Canada would say differently. America would let him, but he would never believe him. His brother spent too much time with France; they spoke differently there. The word for accident in their shared language could just as well have been arson. America forgets ( ... )
Reply
Reply
Myself, I especially loved the mentions to their different age, and the passage of time, Russia's lines on his face, America's newly acquired maturity that doesn't really reach tact yet. And of course, the little bittersweet mentions of some things, like Russia's heart aching when he hears others talk intimately, or his passing comment about visiting during summer and the lightbugs season. The parting not-quite-dialogue was perfect in its incompleteness, its implying and not saying outright.
I really loved this and I can't wait to see your next contribution to the meme! ^^
Reply
<3 I enjoy how everything you liked were my favourite points in writing this, and I shall definitely be contributing more to the meme. I've been lurking it long enough, (and FINALLY found a unfilled requests thread~), so why not give back?
Especially when I don't want to study for exams. x3
Reply
Also: I love America in this. He's still the somewhat "tactless" teen we know, but he is becoming more mature under the weight of all the pressure he's under. serious!America is a turn on for me so yeah...
Just some typos I noticed for in case you plan to post this elsewhere :]
America's voice is close, but not boisterously loud. For this, Russia is thankful. Some days, most nights, he does not want to deal with eth nose the man can create.
should be the noise
Russia continued, and America let him. But when no more words followed, the butter blonde nodded.
And for this I think you meant other blond otherwise describing someone's hair color as butter color is a bit jarring. lol
Reply
Ahhh.
Typos~
Me and them go way back.
Thank you for the corrections!
I might be reposting this elsewhere some day... x3
But I am glad you liked!
And Serious!America is my favourite beyond Commie!Hunter America. x3
Reply
Leave a comment